Frankie: What if Trixie lost everything? Who would be her saviour? Will she ever be the same? One shot unless people want it continued.
Amber: She owns nothing!
The Flood
Turn the lights out, in the light house, Mara had finally got Jerome, I was all alone again... all my hopes and dreams were gone. It wasn't Maras or Jeromes fault! They loved each other... But I saw pictures of them kissing all over facebook before Jerome bothered to tell me! Stay tonight out, by the beach house, it's all so quiet I knew the waves were icy, when i felt them all retreating, But you can't hold on to water, Rising and falling in my dreams,
I saw you coming,Joy was comforting me but then Nathan had some good news to tell her so I was alone again. Alfie, Amber, Fabian & Nina were on a double date. Mick already got a new girlfriend. So I so basically just existed! Nobody noticed...
Felt the ship wreckIts been a week now, nobody talks to me. The House of Cleopatra girls just sit there and laugh at me saying I am the lonely goth girl. I don't care, I sit there emotionless taking it all in. I see Mara and Jerome squashed on the seat. Jerome laughing so hard and kissing Mara. Does he ever think of me?
Saw the wreckage, i heard you yelling, Laughter filled my eardrums, could he not see I was an emotional wreck? Joy was laughing and yelling with Nathan. Was she bothered about me? The last voice I had coming up to me was Nina & Amber saying better luck next time. I heard Jerome laughing again. I ran up to mine and Maras room. I didn't even want to be there,looking at a picture of Mara & Jerome.
Just a mess when i saw my reflection in the sand,I needed to get out, I needed a breathing space. I needed to think. Somewhere I could be myself. Somewhere nobody knew me at all. A place that was new but old.
Wondering where I was washed up,I didn't know where I was going, I just got on to some random bus. I looked at the bus route it said a beach. I used to go to the beach everyday when
I was a kid. I loved feeling the sand between my toes.
Oh i ran to the water, Mmmmm, I saw a dog centre near by, they said dog walkers need volenteering myself I signed up. " This is Lola!" The worker said. All her family have left her and she is left by herself. I looked down at this chocolate labrador puppy who could possibly leave her? I whispered to her " I know how it feels all my family are gone!" I whispered she understood. So I spent all day with Lola! We played frisbee and went in the waves together. I felt like myself not this hard girl everyone expects me to be. My walls are coming down.
i can put my hands down in it, When I got back to the house, nobody noticed I was gone. I just existed here. I was a nobody gone the days of the Trixie and the Joker. I was just Patricia Williamson now no longer Joys, Maras, Nina and Ambers best friend.
But I won't bring nothing up, Someone finally asked me how I was: Mick. At first I thought he was talking to Mara, I just said I was fine. But he seemed a bit suspicious of me and he was like are you sure. My eyes were screaming NO I AM DEPRESSED but nothing came up.
Sitting at the shore all day, waiting on the tide to come I was just waiting for something to happen to me. Mara & Joy got closer it was all my own fault. Mick kept a close eye on me and I don't know why
But you can't hold on to water I looked in my old box, searching for something. I don't know what. Then I saw it my white pandora charm bead bracelet. Then I did something I would never do I took my blue hair extensions out. And I curled my hair. Would anyone notice?
It fills you up but never stays I was hoping someone notice. I wanted someone to notice. I needed someone to notice. But nobody did! I did my hair like that for a day but then I quickly put my blue hair extensions back in. Nobody cared.
It's only good to wash away, today I sat on my bed, I hated this room. I wanted to stamp on everything about Mara. I wanted to chuck her precious text books out a window. I also wanted to rip that bloody photo of me and Joy. No I needed C-O-M-P-O-S-U-R-E
And your loving me like water I hated myself, I saw myself spiralling down into to a depression. Nobody gave a damn. Nobody could give a rats arse. Was I old news now, no longer useful. I am so ANGRY right now does nobody notice. I have slipped right through their fingers.
Your slippin' through my fingers such I'll have another go talking to Joy, she says she is busy. I hopes she remembers this when I crash and burn. I listen to Boulevard of Broken Dreams by Greenday and Happy ending by Avril Lavigne. So much for my happy ending? Right? Mick had another conversation with me. I was a liar now saying I'm fine when I'm not. Jerome is kissing Mara on the sofa. I am so sick of it, I wish I could throw a fit.
A natural disaster love I try talking to Jara, they just snog away. Is that all they do in their spare time? Just rub it my face why don't they? Why don't they just go and get a room? I shout hello then I scream their names. They finally look up " Hiya Patricia what do you want!" Maybe an apology you lying bastards! I say an apology and chuck a pillow at them...Jerome looks suprised but he just carries on kissing Mara. I tell Trudy I won't be back for the night and I run away. EMOTIONLESS.
Bringing on the flood, the flood I won't cry, no they arn't worth a teardrop. I am not going to cry, Jerome isn't worth it. Joy isn't worth it.
Love me like a flood, a flood I got news for Jara, I am beyond caring about them. I hate it so much. Nobody cares about me, I am out the loop so much. I have slipped through their fingers so much, why should I care. Nobody loves me.
Bring it on they can throw anything, nobody stops and listens or cares anyways. But maybe Mick does...I ran to Lola and the beach my safe haven!
Lit a candle, by the window, so you might find it I took Lola, back to her kennel barefoot not wanting the little traces of today gone. I went back to the hut, took a nice long bath then I realised I was close to tears. I breathed in and out. I got out and put an complimentary dressing gown around myself. I saw an airplane, I wished that I still had my friends or someone to notice I burned. I wish Jerome heard the wish!
Ohhh, oh, Why did my boyfriend and bestfriend do this to me?
I can put my hands down in it, yeah, I walked into House of Anubis the next day, Mick pulled me into another room. He demanded to know what was going on with me. He said he was sick of me feeling sorry for myself. I DAMN WELL SHOULD FEEL SORRY FOR MYSELF DAMN THEM ALL!
But I won't bring nothing up, I tried to run, get out of his away. I couldn't he was being fearless. I didn't tell him anything. I just sat on the window pane until he gave up. He said if I didn't tell him what was going on he would never speak to me again and he was the only person on my side.
Sitting on the shore all day, just waiting on the tide to come, I got the bus to my haven. I didn't take Lola. I wondered what to do...I found myself at the cliffs, remembering what Bella did for love in New Moon. Every impulse was saying to do it. The tide was in, I had nothing to live for.
Went to take a dive in the deep end, The water was deep, I sunk to the bottom. Thats where my real thinking began. What should I do with my life? Who should be my best friend now? But it was too late for all that now...I was sinking nobody knew I was here.
Oh, what was i thinking? I was going to die. I think I would miss Lola and Mick at the end they were the ones who actually cared about me at the end. What was I thinking? I heard a dog barking & two strong arms pulled me to the surface. Then I realised I didn't want to be pulled up..I wanted to be left...
It fills you up but never stays, I opened my mouth to try and get the water to fill my lungs. It wouldn't stay. I didn't want to go to the surface and face it all. I would be old news soon. They would get a perky nice peron to replace me. Why should I even care?
It's only good to wash away, I let the water wash away my powerful tears, I was being pulled and the dog was barking even louder. I let the water flow from the me.
Today and your loving me like water, It was Mick who actually pulled me up and the other House of Anubis members were right beside him they were all crying. Lola was licking me happily. I didn't want their pity. They only realised now how low I felt, they were the only family I had and they threw me in the garbage.
I'm slipping through their fingers touch, I ran away from everyone, but Joy, Mara, Nina and Amber tackled me. Jerome, Fabian, Nathan, Mick and Alfie pinned me down. I screamed at them to let me go. Saying I hated them all and only Mick was there for me. I flipped my lid.
Natural disaster love, bringing on the flood, The anger poured out of me. I realised then I didn't need to peaceful or serene. I needed to vent it out. I told them what I thought of them all. Mara cried, Nina cried, Amber cried, Alfie wailed, Fabian cried, Nathan cried, Jerome broke down. I walked with my head held high.
The flood, I sat by the tide, nobody came to see me. I let the crystal tears stain my pale cheeks. I was letting go. Bye Jixie forever. The flood of tears came down my cheeks. I felt the tears sting and my eyes go blotchy. I looked like a natural disaster.
Rising and the falling of my tears that fill the ocean, (the ocean, the ocean) My tears would have filled the ocean that day. I felt two people shouting sorry and trying to join my side...but sometimes its not enough. I walked alone. Mick beside me. He was like my brother now. I don't know if I ever will forgive Joy and Jerome we will just have to see. And that still makes me cry.