Greetings!

Ah yes, another story playing at Robin's ever-so interesting psyche. What can I say... I'm obsessed!

Oh, ahem. Yes, preparatory notes:

Before his first encounter with Slade, Robin had already had to grow up considerably fast for a bright-eyed, 15 year-old boy. How does he cope with losing the last, measly scraps of his boyish innocence after serving as Slade's apprentice?

The answer is... delving into the (many) thoughts of our beloved Boy Wonder... thus, a story.

Each chapter is generally brief, but focuses on whatever the word or phrase of the chapter may be.

Yes, it's rated T... just to be on the safe side.

Enjoy!

Eyes Wide Shut

"There is so much sound in silence."

My eyes were closed.

For a moment, I absorbed and relished in the silence that surrounded me in the car.

The silence was calming. It felt like peace.

So much had just happened.

I had been ready to give up everything I knew to him.

I was so petrified of him slowly, painfully destroying my friends... my teammates... my family...

In the back of my mind, I had a horrible feeling that the destroying wouldn't stop with only the Titans. I knew that he more than likely had plans for my other family in Gotham as well.

Thus, I had finally agreed to do everything he required of me. Of calling him master... only so that he would let them live.

I had lost so much already... I couldn't lose them, too.

My heart leaped, my eyes watered when they broke into the haunt. There was so much love, so much loyalty etched into each and every one of their faces.

They were so determined to not leave without me. So determined to make it so that I was not alone in this battle.

They ignited the spark of resilience and rebellion I had relinquished literally seconds before.

My eyes still closed, still enjoying the quiet, a small smile came to my lips.

We destroyed him. Beat him. Hard. Completely.

I had never felt so much pride and appreciation for my team. My friends. My family.

I had grudgingly assumed that after the night I faced them on top of the Wayne Enterprises building, they would abandon me...

Not that I didn't deserve it.

Despite that I had lost all faith in myself, they never lost faith in me as their leader and their friend.

My eyes were closed.

Yet, as we were making our way back to the Tower, there was an intense stillness between us. A disconnection.

The silence was not longer peaceful. It was uncomfortable, tense.

Guilt was taking a stranglehold on my brief flickers of happiness.

I had tried to destroy them.

Even though I apologized, even though they knew I couldn't risk him pressing the "Kill" button by disobeying...

I had tried to destroy them.

I betrayed their trust, their friendship.

I took every doubt and weakness they had and turned it against them.

Would they ever forgive me?

Would I ever forgive myself?

My eyes fluttered open.

The car had stopped moving.

We were parked in the sublevel of the Tower.

For a moment, I didn't move.

During the apprenticeship, there were several moments when I had been convinced I would never see this place again. I had never noticed how spotless Cyborg kept this place... the impressive size and power of the T-sub... my R-cycle...

No on spoke as they exited the vehicle.

The silence brought me out of my nostalgia and back to reality.

I slowly scooted my way out of the car.

I couldn't control the shame that was splashed across my face.

As I kept my eyes glued to the ground, I followed my teammates into our home.

As we made our way upstairs, I could feel my heart sinking further.

Through their silence and Beast Boy's lingering eyes on my black & orange armored uniform, I could hear them saying "He can't be trusted."

When we arrived in the common room, each slowly went off to their own, everyday tasks: Turning on the TV, grabbing a soda from the fridge, making tea, looking through the cabinets in hopes of finding something to cook...

Judging from their actions, it was as if the apprenticeship had never happened.

I felt like I was going to be sick. My mind was screaming, the silence booming in my ears.

"Guys..." I finally croaked, fighting the sobs beginning to erupt.

It was amazing how they immediately gave me their full attention.

I closed my eyes, searching for words. "I... I'm so sorr-"

"I got the bathtub in your bathroom working again." Cyborg suddenly said.

I let out a shaky breath, frowning at the abrupt change in subject. I hesitantly looked up at him.

His human eye was filled with warmth... and pity. "You should go try it out." He said softly.

Despite myself, I smiled slightly.

He smiled back.

"Thanks... that's probably a good idea." I said, feeling light... and rather filthy.

I remembered that I hadn't showered in well over three days.

The silence in the car suddenly made sense...

Author's Note:

I had intended for this chapter to be dark, depressing, Robin-esque angst. The twist is chuckle-worthy, yes? :)

Yes, the title of this "moment": Eyes Wide Shut. I've never seen the movie, but I know of it and the "very-R-ness" of it. I just liked the title is all.

Please review!