Jim woke up to an empty bed. None of Sebastian's things were scattered about the room. He started to panic. They had a fight the night before. Sebastian had said 'I love you' again, and Jim didn't say it back, again. Of course Jim loved him, but he'd never say it. Sebastian left, claiming he was going to the bar to get wasted, and Jim went to sleep. And now he wakes up to and empty room. He sat up and looked around for a note, any sign as to where the other man went. Upon not finding one, he put his feet to the cold floor and walked out of their room. He smiled as he saw Sebastian sitting in the kitchen, but stopped when he saw he was drinking.
"What are you doing, Seb?"
Sebastian's words were slurring heavily. "Leaving. Well, I'm trying to, but it's hard to leave the man you love. But you wouldn't understand that, would you?"
"You don't mean that. Stop drinking and put everything back, okay?" Jim slowly walked up to the other man, being very cautious, knowing how Sebastian gets when he's this drunk.
Sebastian slammed his glass down into the counter, almost breaking it, causing Jim to jump back. "No, Jim. I'm not fucking staying anymore. I'm not dealing with this shit you make me do. And I am not fucking dealing with you." He got up and took a step towards Jim, almost falling and causing the smaller man to move back, hitting the wall.
"Just sit back down, Sebastian. Let's talk about this."
Sebastian took another step closer. "No, Jim. I'm done talking. I'm done."
Jim was getting scared. There were only two things that could scare him; When Sebastian wanted to leave, and when he was so drunk he couldn't speak or walk properly. And seeing as both of those were happening, this was not a very good situation.
Sebastian took another step towards Jim. "Shut the fuck up you ungrateful bastard. You treat me like dirt. I give you everything and you just use me for your fucking games." Sebastian was just inches from the other man's face now. Tears started falling down Jim's face. Sebastian had hit him once, and he was afraid he was about to do it again. He wasn't even this drunk when he had done it.
Jim's voice was quiet when he spoke, "No, Sebastian, I don't use you for that. You just help mw with things. I need you, please don't go. Just calm down so we can talk, please."
Sebastian was towing over him now. He slammed his hands into the wall behind Jim, trapping him in. He was screaming now, "No! I am fucking done with you. I am sick of all of your shit." Jim tried to escape, but Sebastian was too close to him. "What's wrong? You scared, Jimmy?"
Jim was sobbing now. Whenever somebody called him that, he'd just get angry. But when Sebastian was drunk and seconds away from hitting him, he'd remember his childhood. How his father hit him when he was drunk. "Sebastian, please stop."
"Oh look, poor Jimmy's crying."
Jim was furious now and started screaming. "Get out! Get the fuck out of my flat. Take all of your shit and get out! And you better fucking run because you are a dead man walking."
"Go ahead." He took a step back. "Kill me. You want me dead so badly, why don't you just do it yourself?"
"I can't. You know I can't."
Sebastian laughed, grabbed his things, and started to walk out. "I'll be waiting, Jimmy."
Jim didn't say anything as Sebastian slammed to door behind him. He slid down the wall to the floor and cried. After a few hours, he curled up into a ball on the floor and closed his eyes, not meaning to fall asleep, but he did anyway.
Jim woke up in his bed in the morning. He just figured he had got up when he was half asleep and had forgotten, but he saw Sebastian's things and knew that he moved him. He jumped up out of bed and walked out into the living room, where the television was on and the volume a bit too loud. Sebastian was passed out on the couch. Jim walked over and shook him a bit to wake him up.
Sebastian didn't open his eyes when he spoke, "Please don't kill me."
"I'm not. I can't, we went over this."
Sebastian opened his eyes and looked at Jim. "I am so sorry. I was just going to leave and stay somewhere for a few days, and then come back. I'm sorry, Jim."
"It's okay, Seb. If you want to leave, go ahead, I can't stop you. I'll let you go."
Sebastian sat up and pulled Jim down to sit next to him. "Jim, I love you, okay? I love you so much, more than anything. It's fine that you won't say it back, I don't give a fuck about that anymore. I don't care that you treat me like shit. I love you."
Jim didn't know what to say. He wanted to say it back, be he couldn't. "Sebastian, you know I do. And you know I can't say it. But I do. I swear I do."
Sebastian smiled at him. "I know you do. Can we go to bed, I'm bloody tired."
Jim smiled and grabbed the blonde's hand, pulling him up to their bedroom and into bed. Jim rested his head onto his chest and put an arm around him. "Seb, I hope you know we're not going to sleep."
"I knew you were going to say that." Sebastian pulled the smaller man on top of him and kissed him deeply.
Jim kissed him back and broke away after a few seconds. "Ready for some fun, Tiger?"
"Ready when you are, Kitten."