As you alread know... i'm Calleigh and Eric all the way... although i'm NOT HAPPY with the spoilers about their break up and the rumors about Eric departure, I decide to write this one. Anyway this might be a multichapters but every chapter will be only one...
I don't own CSI Miami.
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Take it back
[Calleigh Duquesne…]
Once again, she looked at the calendar in the wall. It seemed not to believe that the date was that, that one year has past with such an absurd speed. She remembered the smiles, the promises, the kisses. And of everything that they had done back there. Remember of how her certainties turned doubts, of how her warranties turned powder. They were already in the car, her crying, him hurt. Was her decision. Her break up. He had hurt her, that was true but she had too and a lot yet he had forgive her, why she couldn't do the same? The door beats, the steps hurried. A later turning into a good-bye. And the illusion that she had made the right choice beginning coming undone the following second.
Therefore, the calendar hurts. Something was missing here. The same smiles, the most accustomed kisses, the smell of him in her bed, in her skin; the new promises. Not this emptiness, this intermittent question on what would have been. She had always worked badly with choices – Jake, John, Peter, Jake again – and now she had the sensation that the only one she had done wisely was undone little later, for a succession of actions that it could have work as the synthesis of her life. The car no longer more existed, it had never again returned to the same place. But it was impressive as everything was still alive in her memory. Her memory that always fail, always insists on forgetting.
"One year", she sighed. She thought about the symbolism that this took, in the amount of what could have done on that time that it did simply not exist anymore. The life followed her course, a lot has happened and almost nothing was in the same place. She couldn't say that it had been a bad time. It was only impossible to deny that she wanted him to be there. Because, with him, each victory would have had a special flavor - and those that didn't come, would be something to be shared, but never suffered. Because, with him, dreams would have come truth - and those that proceeded in the field of the imaginary, would be something to be postponed, but never lost. Because, with him, to win and to dream was more complete. She missed the feeling of feel like that.
She scratched out, finally, that day of the calendar. A lot of hours still need to come to end the day, but she thought that it could abbreviate the memories doing this. It was one more attempt of deceiving, as so many another that appeared on those 365 days where the cold, the heat, trips, approvals, discoveries, failures, walking on the beach and so much more she had done without him. She thought about writing what she felt, but she knew how she was bad with words. She lied down in the bed and hugged the pillow that one day belonged to him. She smiled, without know why she made it. And it muttered quietly, as who doesn't get to hold an inappropriate thought: "the truth is that it hurts… you, not to being here."
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Thanks!! R&R.
