Eternally :)
I've woke up from one of them dreams again, the ones that leave me struggling to breathe, the ones that leave me frantic and panicky, the ones that make me feel sick, the ones of Seamus. It's been a while since I've had one, since getting back with Steven; the old man has visited me less and less in my sleep. But tonight it felt real, I could feel his breath on my neck, his hands on my body and no matter how loud I screamed no one came, no one helped me. I wish the nightmares would just go away but nothing seems to keep them at bay for long, not even my beautiful Steven.
He hasn't noticed that I've jolted up in bed, I look over to him to see that he is sleeping peacefully; he even has a smile on his face, I'd love to know what he's dreaming about, I'm just glad he's happy. I still can't believe I'm here with him, that he's standing by me after everything. He has no idea how much I care about him and who knows maybe one day I might just tell him. He is the reason I'm here after all, my only purpose is to love him...there is nothing else for me now.
I just stare at him for a while, listening to him snoring light, watching the rise and fall of his chest. I wonder what I ever did to deserve him, so young, so beautiful and so perfect for me. He is everything that I want and more and losing him would be far worse than anything Seamus did to me. I survived Seamus, losing him would kill me. I can't always show him how much he means to me, but I am trying and I hope with time that I will be able to give him everything he deserves.
I quietly get out of bed, my mouth is dry and I need a drink. I head for the fridge and take out a bottle of beer, I have no idea what the time is but I think I need it after those visions...the dreams that haunt me. I sit on the sofa and make myself comfy, I want to sleep, but I can't and I don't wanna go back in the bedroom and risk waking Steven up, although I don't think he'd mind. I sit in the darkness and try to forget, I try to think of happy things and of course Steven is the one that comes to my mind. In a world of madness he's the only one that keeps me sane.
I can feel my eyes getting tired so I lay out the best I can on the small sofa. Memories of me and Steven play in my head as if I'm watching a film and I'm beginning to feel more relaxed now. I must have fallen asleep as the next thing I know Steven is kissing me lightly on the lips. His lips feel so soft, they entice me to kiss him back and the gentle kiss soon turns into something else. Something with need and want and tongues and teeth clashing and again I am left breathless by him.
I have no control over my feelings for him, he takes over me, makes me powerless and I surrender to him willingly. He climbs upon me, not saying a word, just a cheeky grin and a glint of lust in his eyes. I know what he wants because I want the same thing; every single touch makes me want him more. He is wearing his boxers and an oversized t-shirt...my t-shirt and he looks sexy as fuck in it.
I pull the t-shirt off over his head and for a moment we just stare intently at each other. I trail my fingers down his chest, his skin is soft and warm and I think tonight I may need him more than ever. He finds my lips again, our bodies almost touching and I stroke his back, rub his arse and grab at any other part of him that I can. He is kissing me with urgency now, tugging clumsily at my own top, so I sit up with him still upon me allowing him to take it off with ease. I watch as he slips his boxers off and I soon follow suit.
He is so sexy, his lips so full that he almost looks like he's pouting, his skin so smooth and healthy looking that I crave every inch of it. His eyes wide and shining brightly, that they could light up a room. My blue eyed baby who I'm madly in love with, I just can't get enough of him, even when I'm full up. Our bodies are touching now and I can feel him growing harder, just as I am. His body begins to rock a little and I think he's subtly trying to tell me that he wants some Brady love, he can have that anytime.
He's like medicine for me, no matter what I'm feeling or thinking his love always soothes me and makes me feel better. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones. I laugh at how his gentle rocking soon turns to dry humping and I know he is getting impatient, even though we spent most of our evening together fucking. He is up for it all of the time, but I like that...a lot. I push him down on the sofa and take the dominant roll, his legs are wide open, bum lifted up slightly and I can tell he's ready. Sometimes a quick hard fuck is all you need.
I can see how much he wants me and I give him everything I've got now. I know the bedroom is the one and only place where I haven't disappointed him...yet. I hope it stays that way. I enter him straight away with no messing, fucking him hard and fast. I pound him so hard that I think I might break him, but he takes everything I give him and still begs me for more. It doesn't take long for us both to cum, he is smiling at me and I smile back lovingly. God he looks even more amazing after he's been fucked. He breaks the silence; I wondered how long it would take him.
"What you doing out here Bren, I thought you'd gone."
"Now why would I wanna do that Steven, ye know where I wanna be."
"Why on the sofa then?"
"Had a bad dream and it woke me up, I didn't wanna wake you as well."
"That's silly that, can you wake me next time?"
"Yeah okay Steven."
"So your dream? What was it about?"
"I will tell you, just not yet. Ye have to trust me."
"I do, I just wanna know now."
"Let's go to bed Steven?"
"okay...but one day yeah?
"Yeah."
We get into bed and within seconds I had him up close to me. I wrap my arms around him pulling him to me even closer and I hold on to him tightly. He doesn't realise that this, right here, right now is exactly what I want...sometimes the feel of the one you love lying next to you is all you need. He makes me remember the beautiful things in life, unlike Seamus who had destroyed me beyond repair.
"I love you Bren" Steven whispers.
"I love you too Steven...eternally"
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