Author: TippierCoffee
Disclaimer: I do in no way own, or claim the rights, to any of the characters of the show Codename: Kids Next Door. All credit goes to rightful owner Mr. Tom Warburton.
Invented birthdays of sector V members: Abigail "Abby" Lincoln: January 5th; Hoagie P. Gilligan Jr.: February 2nd; Wallabee "Wally" Beetles: March 4th; Nigel Uno: April 1st; Kuki Sanban: May 3rd.
The LTLY series: 1. Learning To Love You; 2. Again; 3. Alone; 4. Ever After.
Four's feelings.
The flight home had been impossibly silent, no one had said a word to each other, not even when they reached the living room of the tree house. They had just sat down some places in complete silence, even the wind outside seemed to not exist in this world anymore.
Numbuh four had positioned himself on the left arm of the sofa, his chin in his cupped hands. He stared ahead of him with empty eyes as his memory kept replaying Numbuh one taking off. A vortex opened inside of his gut and seemed to drag his heart downward in a strange way that was foreign to him. He kept hearing Numbuh two's teeth clatter together in a hollow manner, responding to the constant opening and closing of his mouth. If Hoagie had something to say he should just say it instead of making that horribly annoying sound.
"I can't believe it." Numbuh five finally managed to say; her voice hoarse and groggy. It sounded like she was doing her best to fight back the urge to cry. "I just—" a sigh escaped her lips "I think I'll go to my room."
She started dragging her feet after her, no one protesting to the fact she was going to leave. In all honesty Numbuh four himself felt like going to his room as well and just be left alone with his thoughts.
"I'll go too." Numbuh two's voice came, all its life sucked out of it. Flat and somber.
As they left their footsteps were the only sound in existence until they were gone; then it was just him and Numbuh three. He could hear her sigh heavily, and felt how his chest rose and sank painfully when he mimicked her. His eyes were burning and his cheeks felt numb yet painful, a dizziness which made his head ache had entered while they were flying towards the tree house after Nigel's departure; it had made him feel strangely air sick.
He had an eerie feeling of his stomach being sucked in and his ribs collapsing, his head was buzzing and burning, his cheeks pricked worse by each rapid breath he managed to heave in through flaring nostrils, and his eyes were becoming so full of moist it made him almost blind. There was nothing in the world he could do to stop the frenzy of emotions coursing through him, tightening around him, igniting him. Every millimeter felt on edge, as if he was being plugged onto something putting him out of control of anything going on around him; and inside of him.
Numbuh three's silent sobs from the other side of the couch made him turn his head to look at her. She looked defeated, her right leg crossed over her left, and her head buried into the arm of the couch between her own crossed arms. It made his heart sink into his guts for a moment and seemed to soften the thunderstorm inside of him for the briefest moment, just to replace it with something else he also had no idea what was. Something that didn't change the feeling of his stomach and ribs being pulled into a black hole, but it didn't make his heart follow, and he had the strangest urge to put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her, though he wasn't too sure about what he would then do or say to calm her down. Every part of him still had that underlying monster hidden, waiting at a box full of dynamite, ready to blast it off with a single stroke of a matchstick.
Why had Numbuh one just left them? Sure, he had explained about stupid space kids in Canada—or wherever—having a bunch of parents and being more under control than the kids on the earth, but they could find someone else to help them; right?
A sigh escaped his lips which turned Numbuh three's attention to him, she looked almost pathetic. Her otherwise shimmering autumn eyes had turned watery, which made the colour in them seemingly dimmed down, her cheeks were painted with a glistening trail of never ending tears and her nose was a little snotty. She had her eyebrows raised in concern, which created wave-shaped lined on her forehead, and her usual smile had turned into a frown, so deep it made the middle of her chin curl in wrinkles.
Every now and again her nostrils would flare in a loud sniff, but other than that she was jut sitting there perfectly quiet looking at him. It was almost as if her eyes were trying to drill into him, and tell him something she couldn't manage to say for one reason o another. But what she wanted to say he didn't know, he wasn't even sure he wanted to know, or if she actually wanted to say something. Frustrated of everything going on around him, and the overwhelming feeling of helplessness, he ruffled his hair with a loud groan and got to his feet a little too fast. Blackness and lack of balance plowed into him, stayed for a second, and then disappeared—only leaving a trail of ever having existed inside of his mind.
"Forget this crud!" He grunted, wiping away tears he hadn't noticed coming. "I'll go to my room; this is dumb!"
When he started walking with heavy, angry, steady steps, he felt his chest starting to twist and burn, tightening and cramping. His throat felt like it was being stabbed on by nails, and he wasn't dumb enough to not know, that if he didn't pound something very soon he would put it on the first person in his way. Which, at given moment, could only be Numbuh three as they were alone in the room. He hardly got to pass her though, before he felt her grab onto his sleeve, softly and unsure. Even though he could have easily tugged himself free of her pitiful grasp he found himself stopping in his tracks and look at her.
"What?" He demanded in a heavy sigh. He didn't mean to sound as annoyed as he had, but right now something inside him made him feel like he just needed to be alone so he could beat something up, while breaking down and screaming.
"Wo-won't you stay in here with me?" She sobbed silently, uncertainty underlining her soft voice.
"And do what; watch cruddy rainbow dorkies on TV? Forget it."
"No, I just don't want to be alone. Please?" She begged, new tears springing to her eyes, while she tightened her grip on his sleeve a little. A feeling of his interior being set on fire spread through his veins and his head started burning as well. If he didn't get out of here soon he would explode and say or do something horrible to her, which he would regret for the rest of his life—or until he left the Kids Next Door where he'd forget this ever happening.
"Let go." He tried to suppress the annoyance in his voice, which only resulted in him sounding mean and threatening. For a moment all the burning feelings of sadness, and the thrusting of his love-struck heart, got overrun with a subtle hint of regret, which made it feel like he was drowning in an ocean of a million of different emotions. Emotions he didn't know how to control, but he knew how to make them go away. However Numbuh three kept holding on tightly, and he had to try again, this time it was much more difficult to control his voice. "Let. Go."
It was all becoming too much. He couldn't breathe and Kuki certainly was not making it any better. She had enforced his heart to thrust against his ribcage, and it just made breathing that much more difficult, which made calming down, and trying to pretend he could control anything, so much harder. He would end up hurting her if she didn't respect his need to be alone soon. He could come back to comfort her when he had calmed down—or something.
"Why won't you stay here?" She whined, only adding to his frustration. Didn't she understand he wanted, no needed to be alone?
"Kuki. Please." The fuse was running out, the dynamite would soon explode, he would go berserk, and she would be the victim.
She stood up and hugged him into her, crying silent tears. They prickled down his neck, warm and moist, and then, the fuse ran out. Everything inside of him burst before turning him blind with frustration and sadness. Any attempt to control his temper was lost completely at that moment, becoming as fake as an illusion, and the volume of his voice rose to a beastly roar.
"I. Said. LET GO 'A ME!" The beast inside him controlled everything he did. It grabbed a hold of her shoulders, tightened its grip which made her wince while new tears he had triggered started showing, and then the monster made him do something he'd never forgive himself for. It made him push her hard to the floor so she landed with a loud thump.
A tear rolled down each of her eyes as she looked up to him with a very hurt expression, which made him realize what he had just done in a fit of blind rage. Rage that took over him for three seconds but would change everything between him and Numbuh three. Ashamed of his actions, angry he hadn't been able to stop himself, and sad he had hurt one of his best friends, Wally started backing away. Everything within him shattered, and tears ran to his eyes while he heard how Numbuhs two and five came running to the living room. He only just got to hear Numbuh five asking a crying Numbuh three what had happened before he turned on his heel, with such a speed he almost tripped over himself, and then he ran to his room.
Once he got inside he impatiently slammed the door behind him, jumped to his boxing ring—almost falling over— turned on his training bot, and started pounding, and pounding, and pounding. Flashes of his childhood friend and sector leader, Nigel Uno, taking off in the space ship appeared before his eyes, and as he kept hitting the training bot furiously the image of Numbuh three falling hard to the ground, because he has pushed her, started showing.
Suddenly his pace slowed and the robot landed a few good punches to his face. With eyes full of tears, and a feeling he would vomit soon, he cast the bot to the ground and turned it off before casting himself onto his bed—back first.
The scene of him pushing down Kuki kept replaying so many times, it was almost as if it was the thing he had been mad about all along. It made his stomach turn and his body shake. Her tears so clear in his memory, it stabbed at his heart and made him wish he had been able to just tear himself out of her grip, or at least explain to her why he needed to be alone and he would be back for her.
-Why?- He though, turning to his side and curling into a ball. Why had he hurt her so badly instead of just thinking, instead of just being so stupid.
Regretfully, he realized that he could never undo this action, it was done and could not be changed.
Rewritten. Hope you liked it :)
Criticism and/or advices on improvements is/are highly welcome, and appreciated :3
~*~TippierCoffee~*~
