Words: 2326
(((((A/N: this is just a little headcanon of mine. I'm not really anti anyone when it comes to the show (well *cough-maybe Gothel-cough*). And it's been circling in my head for a very long time. I didn't, and still don't, hate Neal/Bae (I may not have agreed with certain actions, but I didn't agree with certain actions led by anyone in the show… it's what makes them all different and well-rounded characters and who am I to judge when I've never been placed in those situations), and I honestly would have loved to have seen Neal's character explored more in the show (Captain Swan all the way, but I would have liked to have seen Neal happy too). He will always be Henry's father, but Henry has too much of a big open heart that I just can't see him not calling Killian a second father later down the road. Everyone has differing opinions on the matter, but that's just my two-cents…
ALSO: I promise I'm working on Dull Moment chapter 5, but KnightRook-and everything feelsy to do with them-have taken over my life for the last two weeks. (this is also posted on Tumblr... i have well over 21+ snippets and stories over there under my account black-wolf066 if anyone is interested).
Anyway, I hope you enjoy this Captain Cobra piece, because I seriously can't get enough of the two of them bonding as a family.)))))
When Everything Shifts
In all the chaos after getting his memories back—defeating Zelena, the time traveling, his grandfather betraying them yet again—Henry hadn't had the time to truly sit back and mourn the loss of his father.
It wasn't until after his grandfather was banished from the town by Belle—when things had begun to settle and almost seem normal again—that it all hit and overwhelmed him.
So many conflicting thoughts and emotions from both sets of memories assaulted him.
He remembers meeting Neal in New York, sharing pizza and interests as they got to know each other. Remembers the hurt and betrayal he had felt against Emma for her lying to him (Hadn't Regina done that enough? He thought if he could trust anyone, it would have been his own birth mother—who had done nothing but fight tooth and nail for him since the moment he brought her to Storybrooke). He remembers the shared time at Granny's and walking down by the docks with Neal or the time that Neal had drawn him a comic strip on the back of a napkin (a napkin he still thankfully had safely tucked away in a shoe box inside his closet). He remembers the utter happiness he had felt for finally having a father to include in his large, overly convoluted family tree.
Then Pan and his curse happened and his world had been erased and replaced with a new set of memories.
The memories he held of his father in this new life were non-existent. They held only his birth mother and the struggle they had led-for the first five years of his life-until Emma finally gained a stable enough job where she wasn't always away and leaving him with babysitters. In these memories, Emma was more confident and open; the past was in the past and she wasn't willing to lie to him when he had finally asked about his father. She told him everything, not sugarcoating a single thing of how Neal had set her up for a crime she didn't commit and how she had had to give birth to Henry in a prison.
By the time he had gotten his memories back, all his chances-to ask and question Neal about it all-had been taken away from him.
Henry felt utterly conflicted and lost because of it.
He loved his father, just as he loved both of his mothers; they've all made mistakes they weren't proud of, they weren't perfect, but they were family. His family. He now understood why Emma had lied to him in the beginning; he now understood why she had hesitated and grew defensive every time he or his grandparents had pushed her in Neal's direction. But with Neal gone, Henry would never be able to question him, would never be able to get his side of the story (only the side he was told by August later down the road). He would never get the chance to share stories or ask for drawing tips again.
His father was gone and there was nothing Henry could do about it.
Which lead to Henry sitting one weekend afternoon by Neal's grave with a journal; writing down everything he ever wanted to ask and everything he ever wanted to tell Neal about himself. He wrote down thoughts and what he liked, wrote down everything that Neal had told him he liked so he would never forget them.
Though it didn't change anything, it was cathartic, and for Henry, it would have to be enough.
(***)
Some of his answers came in the form of Hook.
It was after his third venture to the cemetery that he was caught by him.
Hook had said nothing, just sat down beside him in silence while he scribbled away in his journal.
It was only then, that he remembered Hook had told him stories about Neal when Henry wasn't himself. Scanning through the journal, scanning over all his scribbles, questions, and doodles; he realized that Hook could help him fill in the blanks; gaps that Henry hadn't felt comfortable with asking Emma to fill.
"What was my dad like? Like when he was a kid?" Henry finally voiced; flipping to a new section of his journal to chronicle everything.
Hook had given him a half smile, his eyes tinged with sadness as he stared at the tomb they sat near. And as his fingers raised to trace over the name etched into the stone; he began his tale from the beginning.
It became a tradition of sorts after that
(***)
Even after convincing Emma and Regina that he was fine with them dating, Henry still didn't know how he felt about it. On the one hand, he was happy for them. They deserved happiness after everything they've gone through in their lives. But that still didn't change the fact that before Hook and Robin Hood (and Roland), Henry had been the only important person in the world to them (he still was, he knew this. They would sacrifice anything-even their own happiness-if it meant protecting him).
Henry liked Hook; he made Emma smile in ways he hadn't seen her smile before. He also liked that Hook shared stories when prompted and taught him how to sail (and cheat at cards and games-something that David was still oblivious over), and Henry often looked forward to those days when it was just the two of them (even if those days were few and far between with all the chaos going on again).
In the same regard, Henry liked Robin. He was nice and compassionate; he knew exactly what to say to calm Regina down and could be there for her in ways that no one else could. He liked that Robin didn't try hard to win his approval (same as Hook); being genuine in his questions and patient with Henry's (especially after coming to find out that this world's Disney version of him was a fox). Henry liked Roland too, even if the shadowing got annoying after a while (at least he could say he now knew what it would feel like to have a younger sibling).
It was still too early to tell for sure, but they both made his mothers happy, so what right did Henry have to get in between that?
(***)
The day Emma stabbed Hook with Excalibur, was the day Henry realized that he could get used to them being around (only to realize this information too late).
He felt Regina and Robin next to him, felt their hands and their side embraces as Henry watched Hook's body fall to the ground—Emma's heart-wrenching sobs twisting at his own as the shock consumed him.
Gone was the man who made his mother see that she could break down the rest of her walls. Gone was the solid link that Henry had to his father. Gone was the man that Henry had come to rely and lean on as much as he did with David.
That night, Henry created a new journal, and with his emotions and author powers mixing; he filled the pages with questions and stories and doodles much like he had with the other.
He didn't sleep at all that night as he mourned another loss.
(And upon Robin's death and Roland's departure with the Merry Men; Henry would end up creating two more).
(***)
The first time Henry felt he could start calling Hook by his real name, they were at the bottom of the ocean in Nemo's submarine. And it was after Killian was willing to sacrifice himself (yet again) for not just Emma's sake, but for Henry's, that Henry knew he couldn't just call him Hook anymore.
He had told Killian that he couldn't bear to break up another family either, and he'd meant it. Killian was more than simply just Hook—was more than the villainous captain searching for a means to an end. Killian had come such a long way from the darkness, had proved himself worthy of their trust, time and time again. And how had Henry repaid him? By throwing that trust back in his face upon finding the shears.
He still wasn't over his father's death (probably never would be. It would get easier with time, he knew, but he would always mourn that loss), and with everything going on in the six chaotic months after, it was only natural that Henry had snapped and allowed the Evil Queen to get inside his head. It was a lot for someone who was barely even fourteen to handle, and though none of that was any excuse, Henry was human; and even heroes made mistakes.
(And how could he fault Killian for keeping the shears, when his own mother had turned Killian into the dark one for the very same reason: because neither of them was willing to lose and say goodbye to the other).
(***)
The subtle shift in their relationship only grew.
Forming Operation Best Man had been the final nail that made Henry realize Killian didn't just see him as the package deal that came with marrying his mother. Killian loved them both equally and he wanted to be a part of their family. The fact that Killian had come to him before ever going to David, spoke volumes.
And after the Black Fairy, after things had finally quieted down and the town became a normal town again, life in his complex family moved on.
And as the days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months, and those months turned to a year; Henry slowly came to accept Killian as his step-father.
(***)
Henry was sixteen when he finally felt he was ready to call Killian a second father.
Killian had always been whatever Henry wanted out of him, whether that was a friend to lean on, an adult to go to for troubles and relationship advice, or a partner in crime when Henry was feeling particularly mischievous.
This time had been no different.
Violet had broken up with him and Henry had felt devastated, soul crushed and lost. After dropping her off at home (manners, he could hear Regina and Emma say. If you're nothing but a gentleman, they'll have nothing bad to say about you later, he could hear Killian as well); Henry had wanted nothing more than to be alone. Yet there were only so many places he could disappear too that his family didn't know about. But no matter where Henry picked, Killian always seemed to know where to find him.
And he was secretly glad that Killian knew where to find him now, for after spending an hour in silence by his father's grave; he was ready for one of Killian's heart to hearts.
They sat and talked, and when things grew too somber, Killian began to reminisce about his earlier days (he may have been on a ship most of his life, but that didn't stop him from crushing on a few of the girls at port, or Liam from ribbing him raw for it either). Henry was still upset, but the stories—of the embarrassing failures in Killian's teenage years—did help keep his mind off of it for a while; enough so to laugh at least.
"Thanks, dad." It came out before Henry could truly stop it, but he also had had two years to think about it. And really, Henry was ready to give him the title.
Watching Killian though, seeing the many different emotions flit across his face—joy, humility, sadness, worry—made Henry think that maybe he should have talked to him about it first; especially as he watched Killian's eyes flit toward the tombstone next to them.
"I know what you're thinking." Henry interrupted his musing before it could get worse; knowing Killian's habits by now to know that he was already self-doubting and worrying that he may have crossed lines. "So please stop. I'm not calling you dad because you're replacing my father. No one can ever replace him. Neal will always be my dad just like Emma will always be my mom." He met Killian's eyes head on and reached out to grab his hook. "But if I can accept having two mothers, why can't I accept having another father in my life?" He had to look away as the emotion building behind Killian's eyes threatened to have his own boil-over. "You aren't disrespecting him or his memory, you never have. If anything you've honored and kept him alive through your stories whenever I've asked. I got the chance to know my father through you, and in turn, I got to know you as well."
"You really think that, lad?" Killian voiced roughly, swallowing back the emotion lodged in his throat.
Henry's own emotion caught as he nodded in response. When he felt he could continue, he did. "I do. You're always telling me how proud my father would be of me, but I think he would be proud of you too. You've kept us safe not just for him, but because you wanted to… because you've come to love us." He sniffed. "I think that's all my father would have wanted for either of us. To know that we were safe and happy. And you've managed that."
The humble look was back as Killian's eyes shifted toward the grave. "I hope you're right, lad."
"I'm always right." Henry responded cheekily to break up the mood; grinning a little wider when Killian chuckled in response.
"Well, my boy, what say you we go and surprise your mother with dinner?"
"Sure, dad." They shared a grin as they stood, and as they left the cemetery to head home, Henry couldn't help but add. "But no mackerel."
Killian's booming laugh as he pulled Henry into his side and ruffled his hair, echoed along the air.
And Henry couldn't have been happier.
