Harhar, another thing about the two of 'em in bed, but not, like, the way we wish they were. Although it is another one when L tries to get sex from Light… It's lame and awkward. Enjoy.

Oh, and remember:

If I owned a Death Note, you'd be dead.

Just kidding.

I love you.

And yes, that was supposed to sound creepy.

L and Light lie on as opposite sides of the bed as was possible connected to each other. Each was silent, lost in his own thoughts about the case, and evidently, one another.

"Light-kun?" L asked quietly through the darkness.

"Yes, Ryuzaki?" Light replied, unenthused.

L paused for an awkward moment before asking, "Have you ever had sex?"

Light, although it wasn't visible through the darkness, flushed slightly. "Why would you ask that, Ryuzaki?"

"I feel I should get to know you more personally," L replied, giving a shrug.

"And that's the question you come up with?" Light wondered, raising an eyebrow.

"It's the first thing that came to mind," L muttered. There was silence for a moment. "Well, have you?"

Light groaned. "What, you mean like with Misa?" he asked.

"Misa," L agreed, "Any girl. Or guy."

"A guy, Ryuzaki? You really take me for that type?" Light asked. But his blush darkened.

"I don't know which type to take you for, Light-kun," L clarified, "That's why I'm asking."

Light paused. "I have. But certainly never with a man."

"With Misa, then?" L asked.

"Yes," Light admitted, "She certainly seemed to enjoy it."

"Well I can't imagine why she wouldn't," L mused, "Light-kun is very attractive, and passionate- well, for certain things. And from what I've seen on camera, quite well endowed-"

"What about you, Ryuzaki?" Light interrupted, flush burning violently in his cheeks. He was infinitely thankful that the room they shared was so dark.

"I'd actually have to admit that I'm significantly larger than you, Light-kun," L replied.

"Not your penis, Ryuzaki," Light sighed, "I meant- have you ever had sex?"

L fell silent for a moment. "No," he confessed quietly, "But I've wanted to."

Light chuckled, "But you're rich enough, why don't you hire someone to- you know-?"

"I don't think it would be entirely appropriate for me to bring a prostitute into headquarters," L replied.

"Misa's staying here, isn't she? Same thing-" Light muttered.

"Light-kun, that's rude," L told him, but was grinning in amusement.

Light sighed. "Are we done having this conversation yet? May I go to sleep?"

"I suppose," L said, not sounding entirely pleased with the conclusion. Light fell silent on his side of the bed. Suddenly, L turned to him again. "Have you ever considered having sex with a man?" he asked.

"Really, Ryuzaki, you lack tact," Light told him. L stared at him with determined panda eyes. He sighed. "I'm not going to answer that."

"Why not?" L asked, "I will."

"I'd actually rather not hear-" Light began, but was cut short.

"I have," L told him confidently, then grew quieter, "Probably more than I should be comfortable to admit."

"Thank you for sharing that," Light said dryly.

"Well, now you have to answer," L insisted. The boy looked thoroughly unpleased.

"Alright, fine," he sighed, "I have- once or twice-"

L was suddenly much closer to him than he'd noticed him coming. His eyes widened.

"I wonder, Light-kun, if you've ever imagined myself the way I've thought of you?" L said quietly. Light blinked once.

"Considering what we've just been speaking about, I'm quite afraid to ask how that is," he said.

"I'll make myself clearer, then," L replied shortly, "Would you like to have sex with me?"

Light gaped, feeling a blush coming on which he would try desperately to hide behind a smart comment.

"Is that what you were getting at this whole time, Ryuzaki?" he asked, trying very hard to keep his voice from coming out as a squeak.

"In a roundabout way," L admitted, now sharing Light's breathing space. The boy squirmed, although not in discomfort. "And I'd like an answer to my question, please."

"Now?" Light asked.

"Yes, the answer," L replied, his hand not going unnoticed as it crept its way over Light's thigh. "And the sex."

He opened his mouth, nearly able to taste L's sweet breath at how close they were. Words escaped him, and he decided to respond in a way that would certainly not make a fool of himself.

L reacted very naturally to having the younger man's lips pressed firmly against his own, but the kiss only lasted so long before the detective sat up

"One more thing, Light," he said, pressing on the boy's chest as he straddled his waist. Light looked a mix of curiosity and anxiety.

"Another question?" he wondered.

"More of an order," L said, smiling devilishly, "You take it from me."

Light didn't respond.

Once again, I only go that far. And once again, if you're interested in writing me a sex scene to go after this, I'd be super pumped about it. Just let me know if you wanna do it, alright? And review regardless, I'd like to see how much I sucked this time…