"I love you, Edd."

"…I love you too."

Marie Kanker lay against the bare chest of her boyfriend, both of his arms wrapped around her. In the pitched blackness of her bedroom all she could do to relate to him was feel him, and the listen to the sound of his soft, crackling voice. There was something different tonight – he was taking longer to reply, and she was sure this was the closest and tightest he'd ever held her. His voice didn't sound tired; if she had to describe the way he was expressing himself, he seemed nervy tonight.

"-Are you okay?"

This time his response was a much quicker one.

"-Yeah, yeah, I'm good. I'm awesome." He smiled at Marie with one corner of his mouth. She wasn't convinced, and his frantically nodding head had nodded one times too many.

"No, you're not."

Marie cupped her right hand sympathetically around Double D's cheek, feeling his pronounced jawline under her skin. His glassy eyes turned to her once again, giving her another sign that she was probably right.

"What's wrong, baby?" she asked. She was beginning to feel agitated herself – she'd always known Double D to be the most nervous guy she'd ever met, but he'd learnt to deal with his anxiety issues quite a while ago; and he never ran away from her anymore like he used to when he was with his weird friends.

"Marie..." he began, his voice now more ruffled and hasty, "…You know I love you-"

His face was now centimetres away from hers again, his breathing pattern moving in a way that was as if he was about to suffer a panic attack. It was so deep, so angry, and his dark eyes signalled as if something deadly serious was about to happen. Marie suddenly got it.

"-Edd…"

She kissed him intensely, and again, and again. Edd's grip became tighter as the two wildly made out under the covers, but this was distressed kissing, trying to hide the elephant in the room. Marie's kisses stung his lips until eventually he had to eject all the words hiding behind them.

"-I slept with May!"

He had closed his eyes tight shut in the process of squealing his confession. He couldn't face her. He knew that was the end of it, the end of his time with Marie.

He could no longer feel her breath on his face. He could still feel her lying on him, but he didn't dare open his eyes to see what she was doing or what kind of expression was painted on her face right now.

"…You slept with my sister…"

Double D gulped a great lump down his getting-drier throat.

"…You had SEX with my sister…"

Beads of sweat began to bubble out of the pores on Double D's forehead. He suddenly felt Marie's voice harsh against his face again.

"-And you think I'm gonna let you get away with that, Edd?"

Double D winced and squirmed, and couldn't stop as he awaited the force of her palm against his face, or the sound of the door slamming as she got up and walked out. Instead, he felt something unusual going on in the nether-regions.

He opened one eye, and timidly lifted up the blanket to confirm that what was happening was actually happening right this moment. Right now, in real life.

"Marie…?"

Her head popped up from between his legs, and for a moment Double D wondered if he was dreaming. He'd just told his crazy girlfriend that he'd lost his virginity to her sister, and she'd punished him by giving him a blowjob. Her brown eyes twinkled, and she slid the tip of her tongue along with her white teeth, glinting inside of her trademark mischievous grin. Then she opened her mouth, but to say words, not to you-know-what.

"…Let's see how I fuck compared to her."

And with that, she was back down again. Double D was no longer wincing, but now panting, in shock and in pleasure.