AN: okay this is a new story for Densi I hope you guys like it, I'd love to hear what you think about it.
The whole team was working on their reports for the day, trying to finish as quickly as they could. Sam left first; he wanted to be with his family as much as he could, especially after what had happened, and had worked extra hard to complete his report expediently. Callen was the second to leave, having received a call from Joelle, which left just Kensi and Deeks alone in the bullpen.
Kensi was still quietly simmering over her jealousy at what had happened earlier today with Agent Del Campo, who had clearly been all over her partner. Kensi was embarrassed by what she'd done in the boatshed with the DEA agent, how she fell into that war over Deeks, and how pathetic she must have looked at the moment. She knew that her partner wasn't interested in Talia—he'd even told her that—but the insecurities she felt was what had made her do what she did. She wanted to show Deeks that she was here and that she was ready for them—'their thing'—to continue. She'd wanted to show Deeks that she was beautiful and that he didn't need to look at Talia, but the problem was that Deeks already knew that. He'd even told her… and what had she done in return? She'd punched him! 'Oh God,' Kensi thought to herself, feeling even more embarrassment flood her at that thought.
What had her really worried was that Deeks was silent, and had been since they'd returned to the Mission. He hadn't said a word, and she finally decided that she needed to know what was on her partner's mind. "Are you okay Deeks?"
He looked up at her. "Yeah, I'm good. Why are you asking?" His eyes returned to his report and he wrote something down.
"It's just, you haven't said anything since we got back here." She explained.
"I'm just tired, and I still haven't finished my report." Deeks tried to reassure her.
"Okay. So burgers and beers at my place?" She decided to change the subject; she didn't believe him, but maybe she could get him to talk at dinner.
"Maybe some other time. Like I said, I'm pretty tired and still need to finish this report and there's more paperwork that I need to finish before I leave. After that, all I want is to crash on my bed." He saw the moment when disappointment flashed across her face, and he wanted to say yes to her offer, but he couldn't do that… not after what had happened.
Kensi did her best to shrug her disappointment off and gave her partner a confused look, but he didn't meet her gaze. "Yeah, okay. Goodnight partner. See you tomorrow." She stood and gathered her things, preparing to leave.
"Goodnight." Deeks replied, and with that, Kensi left the Mission and Deeks returned to his report with a sigh.
It was midnight when Deeks finally finished his report and the rest of his paperwork. He made sure everything on his desk was organized and took bag and stood up to leave, only to leap up in the air. "Hetty!" What are you doing here? I thought you were in DC?!" Deeks exclaimed, trying to calm his breathing.
"I finished my meeting there and I have returned, but I think the real question is what are YOU still doing here, Mr. Deeks?" Hetty replied calmly.
"Uh, I was finishing my paperwork." Deeks replied, avoiding eye contact.
"Is there anything I should know Mr. Deeks?" Hetty eyed him with her scary eyes.
Deeks swallowed hard. "Actually, there is something you need to know, Hetty."
"Care to explain Mr. Deeks?"
He took a deep breath. "I want to resign and return to the LAPD." Deeks stated flatly, trying to keep the emotion out of his voice.
Hetty was unable to conceal her shock. "Did something happen while I was in DC?" She asked worriedly.
"No." Was his only reply.
"Ah. I see. So it has something to do with Kensi?" Hetty asked, putting the pieces together.
Deeks averted his eyes from Hetty's stare and shifted nervously, but said nothing.
"What happened between you two?" Hetty pressed.
"Nothing happened between us."
"And that's the problem?"
"No."
"Then what IS the problem Mr. Deeks? You can't just resign like this." Hetty stated firmly, pushing him to tell her what was wrong.
"There is no problem Hetty! It's just that I want to go back to the LAPD. That's it!" He told her firmly, trying to convey that he didn't want to discuss this anymore.
"Okay." Hetty sighed. "Think about it for a couple of weeks, and if you still want this, I will not try to stop you." Hetty bargained.
Deeks nodded and started to walk past her before stopping. "There is one more thing." He added, not turning around.
"What is it?" Hetty inquired, also not turning.
"I know you can do it, so I would like you to get Jack back from Afghanistan."
"And why would I do that if the C.I.A. wants him dead? It's not safe for him here."
Deeks chuckled. "I know that you have the connections to get him here and make sure that no one, not even the C.I.A., looks for him. You can convince them to let him go." Deeks clarified, convinced that the petite woman could handle things.
Hetty smiled to herself. "I can do that, but the question is WHY would I do that?"
"Because it will make her happy." Deeks stated simply, not needing to explain who the 'her' was.
"I'll see what I can do." Hetty replied, before walking to her office. She didn't know what to feel: admiration and respect for Deeks for putting Kensi's happiness before his own, or sadness at what he must feel by doing all of this. Giving the love of his life to someone else and breaking his heart in the process all happening no too long after he'd been tortured… but it was all going to depend on Kensi's decision.
Deeks was sitting on his couch, a beer in his hand, considering what he'd just done. Had he made the right call? Or the wrong one? To him, he felt like this had been the right one because it was the only one that made sense after all that had happened in Afghanistan.
In the beginning he was ready to do anything to get Kensi back; he was willing to go back to the LAPD if that meant she'd come back to him, and when he'd learned that she'd been taken by the Taliban… he'd almost lost it. He'd wanted to burn the whole earth just to get her back.
He'd gone with the team to Afghanistan to rescue her, and he'd tried to go with them to look for her, but Callen and Sam stopped him. The moment they started to negotiate with the clerk to try and get information on Kensi and gotten nothing, anger began a slow, deep burn within him. Then Hetty had given him the news about Kensi's murder… and when he saw the picture… that was the last straw.
He lost it. Right then and there, and he unleashed all of his anger on the clerk. All he'd wanted at that moment was to get Kensi's body back. Then they'd realized that the clerk was the father of someone important in the Taliban, and they'd used him to get Kensi and—unexpectedly—Jack back.
But what hurt him the most was when he'd gotten on the plane and found Kensi in Jack's arms as they flew them to a camp to be checked out there, while Deeks and the others waited for another plane.
As soon as Deeks' plane had landed, he'd leapt out and searched for Kensi, only to have his heart smashed when he saw them hugging… when Kensi and Jack had pulled apart she still clung to his arms and had asked him if she would ever see him again; it was like she wanted him to come back with her, if only it hadn't been for the C.I.A. agents who were still looking to eliminate him.
Deeks had hoped it was just a passing moment between two old lovers who'd been engaged, but then he'd gotten back to LA and by chance seen the video that she'd sent to Ops… and then he knew that what they had wasn't as strong as he'd thought. It was for him, but he knew it wasn't for her. He found out that she had let herself get captured just to talk to Jack, and then all she'd had to say to them—her team—was "It was an honor working with you." She hadn't said anything to Deeks. Nothing. Even when she knew she was most likely going to die, she had nothing to tell him. Apparently, he was just the second choice. Jack was the first. It was heart breaking for him to realize this, and then subsequently ask Hetty to bring Jack back, but if it was going to Make Kensi happy and give her the chance to live the life she'd wanted, whatever the price was he was willing to pay it. He was willing to sacrifice his own happiness for her, no questions asked. He would die for her, for God sake.
This was the right decision. He knew Hetty would be able to get the C.I.A. off of Jack's back and that Kensi would then have the chance to continue what those two had missed in the past. He would have stayed to work with her, but he knew he couldn't do that. It would break his heart to see her every day, knowing that she would never be his. Just thinking about that hurt. He wouldn't be able to handle it in person.
He finished his drink in silence before heading to bed.
Meanwhile, while all of this was going through Deeks' mind, Kensi was sitting on her couch. She'd gone straight home after work, taken a shower, and turned on the TV, but she hadn't paid an ounce of attention to it since then; she was lost in her thoughts.
Why had Deeks acted like that? She thought they were getting back on track with their friendship, and she thought they were going to be able to discuss their 'thing,' since she'd been ripped from him the last time they'd tried and they hadn't had time to say anything—not even time to say goodbye.
But the last couple of weeks Deeks had been acting differently. He was staying silent for long periods of time, and he wouldn't talk unless someone spoke to him. Even their nights of hanging out were becoming fewer and far between—she felt like they were growing apart with each passing day and she was already feeling his absence in her life.
'What did you think would happen?' She thought to herself. 'He broke up with you. He wants to move on! But he said that raccoons mate for life… he was talking about us, right? He gave me the knife back so we can have some time to think about what we want.' She argued back and forth in her head until her thoughts were cut short by a knock on the door. She stood to see who was there, deep down hoping it would be Deeks, but, as soon as she opened the door, her hopes were dashed. It was Hetty. "Hetty!" Kensi greeted, confused.
