A/N: So this is my first Twilight fanfic. It's supposed to be funny and the slightest bit romantic. It's a two - shot. Disclaimer: If you really think I own this... you're so wrong.
Well, Jasper and Emmett come up with this nickname: Bedward for Bella and Edward. Firstly, because it's their names and secondly it's Bedward. As in about to go to bed and "be grown - ups". A mean nickname, especially in the eyes of the acclaimed Bedward. Enjoy!
Bedward
1/2
Carlisle came in to the living room where Jasper and Emmett were playing video games. He was holding a folder of Bella's death papers.
"Jasper!" Emmett yelled. "Stop crashing into my airplane. You're hurting my health."
"Suck it up!"
"Boys…" Carlisle started.
"Emmett," Jasper growled. "Stop bashing into my helicopter. My monkey's going to fall out."
"Deal with it."
Carlisle watched the sixty-four inch screen with interest. The colours and explosions distracted him until he remembered why he was there. Patiently, he waited until Jasper had won and finished his victory chanting.
"Boys, do you know where Edward is? He needs to sign the statement on Bella's death."
Emmett rolled his eyes, quite put out by his loss. "Don't you mean Bedward?"
Carlisle raised an eyebrow, clearly confused. "What do you mean?"
"Emmett and I have decided that it takes too much time to say Bella and Edward. And since they're always together anyways, we've decided to combine their names to make it Bedward."
"And," Emmett continued, "It's funny. it's like Bedward. Get it? Towards the bed? Implying…"
"I get it," Carlisle said quickly, "Alright; do you know where Bedward is?"
"Somewhere in the backyard," Emmett murmured, distracted by the game once more.
Carlisle sighed. Never should have bought that game for them…
The doctor walked through the expanse of the Cullen Alaskan Mansion, fingering the folder. The past couple of weeks had been hard for Bella. On graduation night, she and the Cullen family staged her death with a car accident. For the sake of a reason to leave for Alaska, they had Edward in the car with her. That night, she was bitten and they left.
But even in Alaska there are humans. The Cullen family thought that, because of Bella's aversion to blood, she'd be able to resist the craving for human blood. But the moment she woke up she sped off in search for a human. Even Edward almost didn't catch her.
That day shattered Bella's heart and Edward's. She felt that she had let him down and he thought he had ruined her life. It cut Carlisle's heart in two also. He hated it when Bella and Edward berated themselves over things that couldn't be helped.
He paused at the backdoor and leaned against the door frame. It was still summer in Alaska with day long sun and no snow. He remember last year, a couple of months after the change. Bella and Edward had been leaning against a tree and she was in his lap. She was turned into him and his arms were around her protectively. Carlisle could hear her crying.
"I'm sorry Edward. I didn't mean to. I disappointed you, didn't I? I'm so sorry."
Edward's face was shocked then it crumpled. "Bella, love, you didn't do anything wrong. You just followed your instinct. The important thing is you stopped."
Carlisle turned away, knowing that this wasn't the right moment to bother the couple. Bella needed reassurance that Edward was there for her even though she couldn't fight her cravings hard enough.
Now, we he looked out into the backyard, he could see Edward chasing after Bella. After her change, Bella grew decidedly more graceful but she still tripped a lot. It took Carlisle a little bit or time to realize that his son and daughter were playing tag. He sighed. They were busy having fun; he would bother them with papers tomorrow.
The next day, Bella's face was scrunched up in concentration. She sat on Edward's lap on the couch and was annihilating Emmett at their game with monkeys and airplanes and helicopters.
"Come on Bella!" Emmett whined. "Go easy on me."
She paused the game. "It's either this or arm wrestling…"
He un-paused the video game and started to annihilate Bella's monkeys with renewed vigour.
Bella turned her head when Carlisle called her and Edward from the kitchen, allowing Emmett to blow her last monkey's head off. "Ha!" Emmett cried, jumping up. "In your face! In your face!"
Bella lurched up too. "No fair! Carlisle called me. I want a rematch!"
Edward wrapped an arm around Bella's waist. "Another time Bella. We have to finish other matters."
Emmett waited until they were a relatively safe distance before calling, "Bye Bedward."
The couple stopped short. "What did you just call us?" demanded Edward.
"Bedward."
The newly christened Bedward waited for an explanation. Emmett, bless his dead heart, was only too happy to oblige. "You see, my friends," he said, adopting a congenial manner, "Jasper and I are very lazy vampires. We'll do anything to make our lives easier. So, we decided, since you two are always together anyway, we would combine your names in to one. Ergo, Bedward. And here's the rub," he continued walking over to place his arms over their shoulders. "It's funny! Do you get it? Bedward? Towards the bed? Implying…"
"We get it Emmett!" Edward said loudly.
Bella's eyes were narrowed, sending a death glare towards the older vampire. "Oh you are so done, Emmett. Stick a fork in you, you are that done."
"But Bella!" Emmett whined. "It's funny!"
"It is so not."
"Bella?" Carlisle said. "Now is not the time."
"I'm coming." She stuck a finger in Emmett's face. "You will feel my wrath."
Emmett snorted, stretching his arms, to show off his muscles.
"You will see Emmett!" Bella cried as Edward dragged her away. "I'm coming for you!"
"So it's obvious what we have to do right?" Bella demanded.
Edward looked up from Wuthering Heights. "Sorry, what?"
"Edward we have to do something to get back at Emmett and Jasper!"
"Why?" he asked, amused at how fired up his fiancée was.
"Why? Did you hear that nickname? Bedward. Honestly, they're such children."
"You do realize that since you're willing to sink to their level you have just called your self a child?"
"No Edward, because there is a difference." He raised a perfect eyebrow. "I have not yet done anything."
"Right. That makes perfect sense."
"Doesn't it?" Bella asked while sitting down beside him. "So what are we going to do?"
Edward opened his arms to encompass the girl. "I have an idea."
She snuggled back against him. "Oh really? Do tell, my lovely finance."
"All we have to do is beat them at their own game. What say you and I do some brainstorming on nickname for Jasper and Emmett?"
Bella nodded once and immediately started thinking. Her eyes narrowed and she twisted her lips to the side. "We could call Emmett BBQ face… No, that doesn't make sense. We could just keep telling Jasper to stop feeling things, but that's kind of mean. What if…? No, that's stupid."
Satisfied that she was occupied, Edward turned back to his book.
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Part two will be up right quick.
