Disclaimer:

I do not own the characters of Harry Potter, these belong to that wonderful author JK Rowling and the various publishing companies used to publish her works. I am however borrowing them, no not to make money but for fun and fun only. Only JK Rowling, her publishers, Warner Brothers and who JK Rowling says can make money and she has not given me permission for that, so no I do not make money off this, again it is for fun!

Summary:

What if in Harry's second year it is someone else who duels with Snape in the dueling club? What hilarity can ensue and how would Gilroy Lockhart react at someone else getting the attention?

He had come as a governor of the school and as such he had just finished a meeting with Dumbledore. Tiring really Lucius Malfoy thought to himself but at least he had left a few of the older girls in the school in titters. This happened a lot, sure he was married but he was a great looking guy and he knew it. Today he was clad in a less formal attire than he normally was wont to do, in fact he was wearing green robes, open to show his black suede tunic and trousers, his fine green dragon skin boots and belt. What with that and his long locks of gorgeous silver-blond hair, gray eyes and clean shaven noble face and of course nice lean body clad in those fine clothes he was a beautiful man if he did say so himself. Gilroy Lockhart I am a more beautiful man than you, he thought. As he was going to head out of the school a hand rested on his shoulder, he turned to see Dumbledore there smiling.

"Lucius I was wondering if you would like to see Severus duel with Gilroy?" Dumbledore was saying.

"Is there any hope Severus will kill him?" Lucius asked hopefully.

"He was the only one as you know I could get to teach, now if you would come and teach…"

"Me? Never I would never, you must be mad." Lucius said walking into the great hall now set up for dueling and there were the first, second and third years here to learn about dueling and there was the git Gilroy prancing around. He saw Lucius Malfoy. "Oh dear."

"Ah Mr. Lucius Malfoy!" He practically sung out.

Now Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter were standing next to each other. It did not seem a good thing at all as they did not like each other. At least McGonagall was behind them so Draco dared not say anything though he looked smug and arrogant as ever. Both young boys looked up as Lockhart shouted out Draco's father's name and saw him walk in. Several of the older girls were giggling and Draco rolled his eyes, clearly his father was not someone to fawn over like that!

"Mr. Malfoy wonderful to see you, splendid, I trust you are here to watch my dueling of Professor Snape?" Lockhart beamed.

"I would love to." Mr. Malfoy said bowing slightly.

"Actually Gilroy why not give the school a rare treat." Dumbledore said smiling, "why not have Professor Snape and Lucius Malfoy duel?"

"Ah, yes well of course, my dueling skills can wait for another day," Lockhart was still beaming but Harry swore it did not reach his eyes this time. "Come up here Mr. Malfoy."

Mr. Malfoy did not want to get up there it was clear but he walked stately up to the platform and removed his gloves and his outer robes. Then he carefully tied back his long hair. Several of the girls were giggling and Harry realized with horror it they were giggling not at Lockhart but the tall imposing figure of Lucius Malfoy. Draco had closed his eyes in horror and when he opened them his father was walking, cane in hand to shake hands with Snape. They exchanged a few pleasantries and he knew that no matter how this turned out he was not going to live this down in his own house.

"You father is dead." Harry said to him softly.

"Dream on Potter." Draco shot back. "My father can duel better than most wizards alive today."

"Yea but he is dueling Snape." Harry said and watched as Madam Hooch came up to read the rules. "Your mother is going to be visiting him in St. Mungos."

"Boys stop fighting." McGonagall said sharply.

"The rules are as follows." Madam Hooch was saying, "nothing that can kill or maim and nothing dark, if you disarm your opponent he is allowed to get his wand back the first time, after that the duel ends in one of two ways, knock-out or calling Pax, shake hands and count off to ten."

Mr. Malfoy shook hands with Snape and they bowed and stood back-to-back and walked the ten paces and turned. They bowed again and began the duel. Snape started with a nice Expelliarmus which Mr. Malfoy lazily defected with Protego, a shield charm. He then shot a Jelly legs jinx, it was blocked and he was hit with an Impedia and flew back to land on his back, a lock of his straight hair came out of being tied back and he was up to block the next hex sent at him. The duel was awesome, even Harry was very impressed. Dumbledore watched smiling, if things got too out of hand he could stop these two in his sleep if he had to. Lockhart was watching in awe as well, these wizards knew how to duel very well. Snape was disarmed first and Mr. Malfoy let him get his wand back and the duel went on.

"What were you saying Potter about my father?" Draco said.

"He is a big…"

"Boys." McGonagall warned them but mostly Harry.

"Sorry professor." Harry said.

Now the duel really heated up, Snape shot a jinx at Mr. Malfoy that had it got him would have turned his beautiful hair green and Mr. Malfoy shot a jinx that made Snape start to tap dance, he took it off and shot something at Mr. Malfoy that caused him to double up in laugher, a cheering charm. He got it off and threw the same charm back at Snape so hard it took Snape several minutes to get enough air to take it off he was laughing so hard. As the duel went on Harry was sure the men were enjoying this, he was not sure but though they looked as if they wanted to kill each other it seemed this was a game to them. Snape disarmed Mr. Malfoy and let him get his wand back and hit him with a stinging hex that made Mr. Malfoy yelp as it got him in the rear. He turned and fired several at Snape who blocked them and tried to Stupefy Mr. Malfoy who blocked this as well.

"Ten Galleons on Snape." Harry said to Draco.

"Raise you to twenty on my father." Draco said.

"Done." Harry said watching the duel go on.

The spells got more complex and even Harry was impressed, clearly these two were extremely skilled. It had to end sometime and after about half an hour Snape was shooting hexes, curses and jinx so fast that Mr. Malfoy had to keep a shield charm up and could not send much back at Snape. Finally with a twist and flick of his wand Mr. Malfoy soared through the air and landed in a heap on the floor. Snape was over him in a flash and his wand was pointing down at him. Draco whimpered and Harry grinned.

"Say it." Snape said eyes flashing.

"No," Mr. Malfoy said and then as Snape got ready to send a shearing charm at him "Pax, Pax!"

"The winner is Professor Snape." Madam Hooch said then at the look the two men shot at each other and the fact that they were now rounding on Lockhart , "gentlemen don't even think of it!"

"Of course madam." Mr. Malfoy said smiling at her and bowing, he took his robes and drew them on and untied his hair causing several third years to sigh.

"Splendid duel gentlemen, now I think yes we should have two students come and have a go." Lockhart said and Harry looked up from the galleons Malfoy had paid him and moved as far from Draco as he could. "Ah yes Harry come up here my boy, oh and Ron there…."

"Mr. Weasley's wand causes destruction wherever he goes," Snape said maliciously, "perhaps someone from my own house, Draco Malfoy perhaps?"

Mr. Malfoy was at the door and turned, oh surely not, his son would take the poor boy-who-lived apart! Still he stayed in the background and watched as Draco got on the platform, this could be good, real good, well as good as second years could do. He hoped it would not end up in a fist fight but then Harry and Draco were civilized boys, so unlike Snape and Sirius Black had been at school. (Those two had fought every chance they got, in his last year he remembered pulling the first years apart bloody and still cussing and cursing each other as he hexed them to the wall). Draco and Harry were gentlemen and thank heavens for that Mr. Malfoy thought.

"You scared Potter?" Draco shot at Harry.

"You wish." Harry said.

"Shake hands." Lockhart said.

They did and Draco was the first to disarm Harry, Harry got up and sent him flying, this could turn out very good as Snape whispered a spell to Draco. He shot it at Harry and Mr. Malfoy made his way forward and saw a large cobra slithering to Harry. This was going to be fun to watch the boy get out of this. What happened next shocked even him and he did not get shocked, well not by tiny school boys that is. Harry Potter, a Gryffindor spoke Parseltongue, at the snake. Of course he Lucius Malfoy had learned enough Parseltongue to know Harry was telling the snake to leave but that skill was not one he wished to advertise. Harry Potter was a Parseltongue, a natural Parseltongue, just like the dark lord had been, just like Salazar Slytherin had been. His knees felt weak and the voices in the hall went dim and someone was helping him out and that was the last thing he remembered.

"Not the only one to pass out I am sure, but if you would have taken him to the hospital wing." Said madam Pomfry.

"Oh he will be most embarrassed when he wakes as it is Poppy." That was Dumbledore.

"What happened? I saw him walk out of the hall and now I hear he is here?" That was Snape.

"The shock my dear man." Dumbledore again.

Mr. Malfoy opened his eyes, he was on a couch, in an office, not Dumbledore's, no it was McGonagall's. Dumbledore, Snape and Poppy were over him and he realized what had happened, he nearly passed out again, Harry Potter was a Parseltongue! He then felt embarrassed, had he passed out in front of the whole school?

"You walked as far as the first floor, then I had to bring you here." Dumbledore said. "Nasty shock to hear that I am sure as Voldemort was so skilled with it."

"How does the boy speak it?" Mr. Malfoy said.

"That I have theories on." Dumbledore said. "I must leave, I have students to tend to."

"Of course sir." Mr. Malfoy said and Dumbledore was gone.

"Well let's make sure you are alright Mr. Malfoy." Poppy said briskly she walked up to him to check him out with her wand.

Unfortunately at that moment Lockhart came busting in. His eyes lit up at Mr. Malfoy who was still on the couch and Mr. Malfoy sat up and rose slowly. It was not planned at all but it felt like it. Lockhart said he had followed everyone here and he could help Mr. Malfoy and the fury on Mr. Malfoy's face was priceless. He looked at Snape and a cold smile came over the two wizard's faces, they walked to Lockhart slowly and grabbed him by the arms. Oh he would not remember this tomorrow, but today both men were going to have a bit of fun with Lockhart.

"Where?" Mr. Malfoy said.

"Dungeons, there is an unused one, Filch wants it opened back up to lock up students in detention." Snape said.

"S-Severus?" Lockhart said fear in his voice. "M-Malfoy?"

"Perfect end to a day I must say." Mr. Malfoy said. "You will make sure he does not remember this?"

"Yes, plus it will be fun." Snape said.

So down to a dungeon rarely used and into it they went. They advanced on Lockhart, wands out and he screamed. They did not reach the corridor because a muffling charm works wonders. Next morning Lockhart could not figure out why he had a headache and why he ached all over. Snape however was being so very nice now, maybe he really was a good fellow after all. Lockhart hummed as ploughed through his breakfast unaware of the stern look Dumbledore was giving to Snape who had a faint very faint smile on his face…