A little alternative version to TOW the late thanksgiving, enjoy and review
nope still own nothing
(The phone rings in Chandler and Monica's apartment)
Monica: Okay, I have to get that. Now when I get back, I want you and your friends to be gone. Thanksgiving is over. The Vein has spoken.
Joey: It's really starting to hurt.
Chandler: Okay, look, I'm gonna pull on the door and you guys push as hard as you can. Maybe we can get enough room to wiggle him out, okay? Okay, so PUSH!
Phoebe: Just a sec., we're kind in the middle of something here.
(Rachel, Ross and Phoebe have their hands full and are stuffing all kinds of things down Joeys pants.)
Joey: Ooh! Stop putting things down my pants!
Chandler: Come on guys, PUSH!
Joey: Yeah! Come on!
Joey and Chandler: PUSH! PUSH! PUSH!
(The chain breaks loose from the wall, and because Joey was pushing with all his might, he propells into the kitchen, towards the table with all the food. This table has wheels underneath it, and when Joey falls on this table, he rides into the living room, with all the food falling off, until finally Joey also falls off... Joey gets up quickly, a bit agitated, and acting as nothing happened. He is covered in food stains.)
Chandler: My cranberries!
Joey: (looking at himself) Man, I've got food all over me.
(He licks his fingers, liking it. He offers Chandler a taste.)
Chandler: Argh! I can't believe what you did. Monica's gonna kill you!
(Monica enters from the spare bedroom.)
Chandler: (to Monica) Look! Look! Look what the... Look what... Look what the floating heads did!
Monica: there's food all over my kitchen! (Monica stares at Joey)
Joey: why are you looking at me for!
Ross: you're covered in food dude
Joey: oh yeah, well I can see how this looks bad but
Monica: you know what just stop talking all of you! You already ruined thanksgiving and even though I was in a pretty bad mood before, after having to talk to my mom on the phone and listen to her belittle me as per usual you do not want to cross me right now!
(everyones stunned)
Ross: (trying to break the silence) so how's mom?
Monica: just her daily phone call asking for another grandchild (she starts crying)
Chandler: Mon sweetie come here
Monica: no I can't I have to clean up this mess and I want all of you guys to leave
Rachel: wait just one second, Monica now we know we screwed here but this is thanksgiving
Monica: Rachel you didn't just 'screw up' you took me and Chandler's cranberries for granted, did you guys even consider why we didn't want to do this dinner in the first place?
(everyones silent & looks at the ground)
Chandler: good answer guys
Monica: we have had a horrible few months, no you know what we've had a horrible year! Between Chandler working in Tulsa, finding out we can't have kids, now trying to adopt and getting a heart attack every time the phone rings thinking its the adoption agency we are exhausted! That was why we didn't want to do this dinner because we just wanted a break (Chandler pulls her into a hug)
Phoebe: you know you could have just told us that only maybe in a lower tone of voice
Ross: Mon honey we know you guys have had it rough and we're truly sorry, I know I've never offered before but do you want me to help you clean up
Chandler: have you just met Monica, she never even lets me help her clean
Monica: guys please just leave and take the leftover food with you there's no point in you all being hungry
Ross: we're not that hungry
Joey: Ross let the lady offer us the food!
Rachel: what about you guys?
Monica: I've lost my appetite, I just need to clean
Ross: for how long?
Monica: I've never felt this bad before so probably like a decade (Ross hugs her) and Chandler sweetie you can go with them?
Chandler: whoa I'm on your side, that Chandler you were talking about before, the one you had the bad year with, that was me
Monica: no honey I know you're hungry and not nearly as emotional as me right now, I'd be no fun to be with
Chandler: Mon you shouldn't be alone right now
Monica: its ok really, I'll clean this up and I'll be over later
Chandler: (not convinced) ok but you know I'll just be across the hall if you need me (he kisses her)
Joey: alright so we all love Monica, now can we please eat!
Phoebe: yea if we wait any longer Joey's going to eat his shirt
Joey: that wouldn't be a bad idea, its all my favorite thanksgiving foods mixed together
Scene: Joey's apartment, everyone but Monica's there eating
Rachel: this is weird being here on thanksgiving isn't it
Phoebe: I dunno the only difference is the smell
Ross: yea what is that!
Joey: Chandler man you haven't said anything or eaten much
Chandler: are you asking me how I feel or do you just want my turkey?
Joey: dude I'm not going to lie . . . its both of those things
Chandler: take the turkey, I'm not hungry anyways
Ross: listen for what its worth, Monica was right we do take you guys for granted . . . well we take Monica for granted
Chandler: yea well I don't! I told her not to do dinner today, I mean sure we're both pretty tired but at least I don't have to deal with the daily phone calls from your mom wondering when her next grandchild is coming
Rachel: I guess we just didn't realize how much you guys are going through
Chandler: you know what I can't be here, I'm going over to her
Joey: dude I think she wants to be alone
Chandler: nope she doesn't get to make those decisions because I don't want to be alone today! (he leaves)
Joey: he's not alone, he's with us!
Ross: I think he wants to be with his wife Joe
Scene: Monica & Chandler's, Chandler enters, Monica's cleaning
Monica: what aren't you over at Joey's?
Chandler: because we're married!
Monica: (sarcastic) we are?
Chandler: no Mon what I mean is we're married
Monica: you only realizing this now?
Chandler: what I mean is that we're a team and even though you might want to be alone right now, we're both going through this stuff and I don't want to be away from you . . . I never want to be away from you
Monica: oh Chandler (they hug) I don't want to be away from you either and I think I may have slightly over-reacted earlier with the others
Chandler: honey they did take you for granted . . . and my chanberries too
Monica: yea but I think I took out all my worries about the adoption out on them
Chandler: you feeling better then?
Monica: yea I just needed to vent a bit I guess, you can too you know
Chandler: what do you mean?
Monica: you know take out all of your frustrations on me
Chandler: I don't need to do that because I know we're going to get a kid
Monica: how do you know that?
Chandler: because you are destined to be a mom, you just are and therefore since you are I am too by association (he kisses her) I knew it was a good idea to marry you
Monica: yikes I think that this is one of those rare moments in our relationship when our roles are reversed and I'm the worrying one and you're the calm composed one
Chandler: it feels weird
Monica: come on, I should go apologize to the others
Chandler: you have nothing to apologize for!
Monica: no but all the food's over there, its thanksgiving damnit and we're supposed to be stuffing our faces
Scene: Joey's apartment, Monica & Chandler enter
Chandler: hey guys
Ross: you ok?
Monica: yea, I may have slightly over-reacted with you guys and I'm sorry (Ross hugs her)
Rachel: you two want some dinner?
Joey: we were supposed to keep some food for them?
Chandler: you ate all the food!
Rachel: don't worry, when Joey wasn't looking we left two plates aside for you two
Ross: listen I love you all and I'm glad you're not mad at us but can we continue this in your odorless apartment (everyone but Joey leaves)
Joey: I don't know what they're talking about, it doesn't smell over here (he keeps eating his dinner)
hope you enjoyed!
