AN: Hi everyone!

This is my first uploaded fanfiction ever, I hope you'll like it! I was writing fics for ever now, but never had the courage to upload any of them. But now I have decided to do so... so basically I'm a newbie, so be kind with the reviews please! ^^

Summary: Allen has a temporary nervous breakdown and he decided to take out his long forgotten diary to write down his current emotional state.

Warning: It's a YAOI! Boys on boys, BL, homosexual content, gay fic, whatever you call it. Emotional wreck Allen, love triangle, whining, angst, probably a bit OOC. Swearing, hints of sexuality, possible spoilers from the manga. Grammar and spelling mistakes. (Sorry, I'm not a native English speaker….)

Disclaimer: The usual… I don't own DGM, or any of its characters!

My life is a soap opera!

Annoying…. it's just simply so fucking annoying!

I mean I am a patient and humble guy, usually I'm not easy to piss off…. but he…. he just makes me tick all the time nowadays.

I thought he was my friend, we fought alongside all the time…. hell we even made a quite good combo. Me clashing the higher level AKUMA-s with my Edge End, or Sword of Exorcism, and he would take care of the lower levels with his Fire Seal in great numbers.

Okay, this hasn't changed, I could still relay on him in battle, as I know he would watch my back, so as I would his. But lately - after he renounced being the successor of the Bookman line and he decided just to be an exorcist - his behaviour had changed in some ways. He was still the old cheerful, comic relief, idiot Lavi we all knew, but now as an exorcist he is allowed to have feelings, and that aspect of him made him annoying!

Not for everyone, but for me though…. Lenalee for example, was so happy that she has yet another brother, who has a 'my cute lil' sis' complex, not that Komui and his Komurins wasn't enough….no now Lavi has also taken up the overprotective brother role.

Which was a surprise to be frank…. we thought that - with his tendency to go 'strike!' when he sees a cute girl - she would be the first to be jumped on, when Komui is not around and she has become of 'age'. But no…he did not….

He jumped on the 'annoys the hell out of me' number 2.

Kanda.

The stoic, cold hearted bastard, and his death glares that should scare the hell out of the Millennium Earl himself…. with a long silky black hair, and toned muscular chest with his curse tattoo, and perfect face and so damn kissable lips….

Stop, stop, stop…. back to the topic, before I would feel hot and bother just to think about how Kanda could look like while having a hell of an orgasm, given by me….

Ehem….so…. yeah…. now I should take a cold shower…. damn….

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