I do not own Supernatural or Star Trek 2009.

This is number four in an ongoing series of short stories, following The Tamir Incident, Shore Leave and The Ruination of the USS Impala. It's not necessary to read the others first but certain small things would make more sense if read in order.

.

Captain James T. Kirk of the Federation starship Enterprise had never felt so useless.

It had been a routine supply and survey run to a small colonized planet hidden in a large asteroid field. The planet itself housed a strange mineral in the soil that accelerated plant growth and thus was of great interest to the Federation.

So the Enterprise had stopped off to deliver its load of medicine and tools, only to have a small strike force of Romulans beam directly aboard the ship and immediately transport back out, taking the dilithium crystals with them in a masterful display of transporter technology.

Scotty was furious, almost in tears.

Kirk was livid.

And the Enterprise was stranded.

No transmissions were getting out courtesy of the asteroid field. Impulse power was dead. Shields minimum. Life support, thank goodness, was holding steady.

Dead in the water and the Romulan warbirds took absolutely no notice of the impotent flagship.

"What. The. Hell." Kirk enunciated clearly in a cold tone of voice that boded ill for any who crossed him.

And then it appeared.

The nightmare that no one had ever expected to see again.

It had fragmented, shattered, imploded in a singularity. It had been destroyed, they had all seen it falling apart into a hundred billion pieces.

Yet there it was.

The Narada in all its menacing, hulking glory was being towed out from behind one of the planet's moons.

There was a quiet moment of panic aboard the Enterprise's bridge before Kirk ordered them to zoom in.

Black, spindly arms, like some sort of demented dried thistle dominated the screen and Sulu could hear Chekov gulp nervously.

"That's not the Narada," Kirk said slowly, with a detached interest. "A very good copy, but that's not it."

Spock stepped right up to the screen, examining the picture with Vulcan intensity. "You are correct, captain. It appears to be several smaller ships, deliberately designed to mesh together and create a facsimile. Fascinating, if disturbing."

"So vhy create a wessel that appears to be de Narada, ser?" Chekov asked curiously as panic bled away, reassured by the captain and first officer's steady nerves.

"I don't know but it can't be good for the Federation," Kirk said thoughtfully.

"Captain, the ramifications of the Romulans stealing our dilithium crystals are dire." Spock returned to his station, fingers flashing over the console in a thousand different scans, gathering vital information.

Kirk smouldered in his captain's chair, thoughts flickering behind brilliant blue eyes at trans-warp speed.

"Yes, yes they are. You can power a lot of things with the Enterprise's dilithium crystals. Uhura, you have to get a message out. I don't care if you have to send it via Morse code using an ancient telegraph machine, the Federation has to know about that monster."

That monster was filling the view screen like a déjà vu no one on the Enterprise had ever wanted or expected to experience again.


"Uhura?"

"Nothing yet, sir."

A thin-lipped nod.

"Keep trying."

"Yes sir."

Lieutenant Nyota Uhura was not going to fail her captain. Spock was feeding him a steady stream of new information. Sulu was conferring with Scotty on how best to jury-rig the propulsion systems just in case. Chekov was helping Spock.

And she had the most vital job of all.

She would not fail.

But she did not see how she could succeed and the thought burned like molten bile at the back of her throat.

Flipping through schematics and maps of the area almost frantically, she paused for a second. Ship locations for the month – useless – wait.

A thought occurred.

It was a long shot. But a long shot was better than no shot.

She yanked up her console panel, exposing wires and circuitry. Flipping out a tiny soldering tool she set to work. It was the work of a moment to divert all power to one small, rarely used crystal and Uhura banged the panel back down in triumph. Tossing the soldering tool to one side, she pounded out the message, hitting the send key and crossing her fingers.

Everything hinged on one man.


Impala

Commander Sam Winchester was dead bored. He could feel his brain leaking out his ears. They were floating in space, waiting for a late transport vessel to rendezvous with them and there was absolutely nothing for him to scan, examine, probe, extrapolate, theorize, fantasize…his console chirped and he sat forward in interest.

A low-frequency, ultrasonic band was registering activity.

There should be nothing in the area.

Excellent.

He delved into the mystery, quickly sobering.

It was an encoded message.

From the Enterprise.

"Dean, we have a problem," he announced and his brother swivelled around in his captain's chair.

"Yeah, what kind of problem? Fun trouble?"

"Federation-threatening trouble. The Enterprise walked into a Romulan trap."

"Of course they did. That's fun trouble. Damn Kirk."

"Dean, be serious. They were on a routine supply run to GF-20394 and arrived safely. But Romulans somehow managed to steal all of the Enterprise's dilithium crystals, they're dead in the water and Uhura says they've got eyes on the Narada."

Every action on the bridge froze.

"The hell? I thought Kirk said they fried that thing and then tossed it into a singularity! It's like a radioactive cockroach!" Dean leaned forward in his chair. "What else is there?"

Sam shook his head. "That's it. Uhura kept it short to minimize detection risks."

"Shit," Dean swore. "Get a message out to the Admiralty, ASAP. Better yet, get me Pike."

"Dean, I can't do that. We're too far out. I can't raise Earth or Pike. The closest I can get is Starbase 11, but upper command there is Komack-loyal."

There was silence on the bridge as Dean thought furiously. "Damn the Romulans," he finally said. "The only Constitution-class ship capable of reaching Earth or any other major target in time is the Enterprise. The other four may as well be deployed on the other side of the frigging galaxy for all the help they're going to be. Kirk'll know that and if he doesn't, he'll guess. All right. Cas, set a course for Starbase 11, maximum warp. I want to be there yesterday. Sam, give the Enterprise something to hope for."

The Impala shot smoothly into space.


Enterprise

Eight breathless minutes after the message went out the little 'receiving' warble from her console was officially Uhura's new favourite sound.

"Captain!" she cried. "Captain, I got through!"

"Excellent," Kirk replied, an invisible weight lifting from his shoulders. "Do we have video?"

Uhura winced. "Uh, no sir. Text only, I'm afraid and I had to keep the message brief. I only got two words back."

Kirk did a passable Spock-eyebrow impression. "Explain?"

"It's a long story sir, but I used an experimental wave length that Commander Winchester and I were theorizing about the last time we met up with the Impala. I noted on the ship's schedule that they were supposed to be in the same quadrant today and sent out a message, hoping that Commander Winchester was still monitoring the frequency to keep up with our theory. And thank goodness, he was. The message reads 'On it.'"

"And now we just sit here." Kirk finished, depressed again. "Excellent job, Uhura. Scotty?" He punched the button for engineering. "What do you have on the engines?"

"Ah'm sorry Capt'n. She needs sommat t'burn and Ah've got nothin' tae give her."

The Scottish accent was thicker than Kirk had ever heard it, fraught with irritation, anger, frustration, self-loathing – Kirk was going to have to get Scotty roaring drunk and convince him the Enterprise still loved him after all this was over.

"All right. Keep at it."

"Aye."


Impala

"Dean, how the hell are we going to play this? Komack isn't going to accept a short text message on an experimental frequency regarding a resurrected nightmare even if Kirk's always right."

"We're going to do it by the book."

Ash snorted coffee out his nose. Castiel swivelled his head around on his neck so fast it almost snapped off. And Sam stared, wondering if tribbles had eaten his brother's brain.

Dean grinned. He loved doing this to his crew. "After we've filed this appropriately and it's in the system and such just like Admiral Komack is always telling us to do, we're going to dock at Starbase 11."

An amazed ensign over at secondary science station let his hand fall on his console in sheer incredulity, resulting in an indignant beep.

Not a single eye strayed from the smirking captain.

"Then we're going to steal four dilithium crystals from Starbase 11 and go rescue the Enterprise so the Enterprise can rescue Earth. Again."

Several planets dropped back into their proper orbit and Ash grinned manically while Sam slapped his face into a palm. "And there's Captain Winchester. For a minute there I was afraid you'd been replaced by a Starfleet drone."

"Afraid not Sammy, so you'd best come up with a viable plan to get us those warp cores and then escape from space dock before Komack throws our collective asses into the brig and scraps the Impala out of spite."


One and a half hours later, the Impala dropped out of warp, contacting dock control asking if they could perhaps tank up on extra coolant. They'd had a leak into space, you see, and the old girl's repair systems weren't quite what they used to be.

Bobby choked in indignation when he heard the excuse.

As the excuse-provider, Sam ignored him.

Space dock waved them in without incident. Dean, Sam and Ash slipped off the ship with a handful of transporter tags. "Dean, I'm still not sure how we're going to get out of space dock," Sam muttered as they ambled into the control room.

"Chill dude, I know a guy. You two go do your little errand; I'll worry about getting us out of here." Dean's grin was genuine, not his usual shit-eating fare and it was reassuring.

"Don't get caught."

"Sammy, I'm hurt!"

Sam rolled his eyes and jogged off after Ash. They managed to slip into the dilithium holding bay with no trouble, citing assessment for their next refit. They had to be a bit more careful as they strode past the Miranda-class crystals and towards the Constitution-class section. If anyone asked, they'd claim curiosity.

"Holy shit," Ash drawled. "Constitution-class babes are power hogs. Just one of these could power the Impala for ages and the Enterprise needs four?" Sam shushed the loud navigator and slapped the tags on the bottom of the big crystals.

Back aboard the Impala, the crew waited anxiously for the captain to return. Sam and Ash had made it back without incident and now Sam was trying not to fidget.

"I'm aboard Cas, take her out, Komack's goon saw me and he's gonna get suspicious!" Dean suddenly ordered over the comm.

The Impala disconnected, hastily thanked the starbase for the hospitality and activated her transporter one last time.

Four large dilithium crystals materialized aboard the ship, four dummy crystals immediately replacing the real ones back on the starbase as Castiel sedately continued to pilot away from the starbase. No sense in looking more suspicious than normal.

Appearing on the bridge in a breathless rush, Dean plopped into his chair with satisfaction. "The docking boys now know the Enterprise's story and they'll keep it to themselves. We don't have any problems unless one of Komack's idiots – "

"We're being hailed. By Komack's pet lieutenant," Sam interrupted dryly. "Evidently there was an official inspection of the crystals just as ours disappeared."

"Oops. Cas, get us out of here," Dean barked. "Maximum speed, maximum warp as soon as you can."

Castiel took his captain at his word. They skipped around another Miranda-class vessel, under a shuttle and over a transport at dangerous speeds before rushing to warp. "Estimated time of arrival is 2.43 hours sir. Unless you wish to reach warp 9.6?"

"Don't think so, Cas. We don't need to be dead in the water or suffering structural stress when we may have to play with Romulans later."


Enterprise

Tick tock. That was all the bridge crew did. Watch the clock. They couldn't relax, in case the Romulans decided to attack. There was nothing else to repair, not that there was anything to repair in the first place, except for of course the main power systems.

Tick tock.

"Are you sure all we can do is sit here?" Bones had joined them after Chapel had kicked him out of sick bay for terrifying the nurses and wearing out the floor with pacing.

"I am quite certain, Doctor. We should not expect aid for at least another six hours, Jim," Spock commented softly. "Perhaps you should relieve the crew?"

Kirk smirked humourlessly. "You think they'll leave the bridge willingly? Would you leave the bridge?"

Spock considered. "Your point is valid."

Tick tock.

"Sir, the neo-Narada is moving," Spock reported. "Projected destination at present is most likely Earth. Estimated top speed is warp 7."

Everyone fidgeted, watching the big black amalgamation move through the asteroid field, pulverising all debris in its way using disruptors.

It blinked to warp half an hour later.

Three Romulan warbirds left to babysit the toothless Enterprise.

"Confirmed projected destination is Earth, Captain."

Tick tock.

"Ser!" Chekov's voice jumped an octave or three. "Ser! I am wegistering de Impala on our long-range sensors!"

Kirk jolted upright. "This early? On screen!"

Sure enough, the plucky Miranda-class courier was zipping gracefully through the asteroids, deliberately choosing a course that allowed the Enterprise to spot them, but not the Romulans.

"Damn, Winchester has a good crew," Sulu whistled. The Enterprise would never be able to pull off such a feat – she was too big.

"Maintain comm silence," Kirk ordered almost unnecessarily. No one wanted to get their little rescuer killed.

"Incoming transport, Captain," Spock reported. They waited tensely.

Then Scotty's voice crackled out of a speaker. "Sir, 'tis the damndest thing! Four dilithium crystals just appeared on our transporter pad!"

Kirk threw his head back and laughed, a booming expression of profound relief. "God-damn, he is good! How the hell did Winchester get permission for such a stunt?"

McCoy snorted. "Who said he asked permission? Kid probably got your message and decided to take immediate action."

"It is highly probable that he was forced into such a course," Spock speculated as power meters began to rise all over the bridge, Enterprise returning to life. "The only station within range is Starbase 11 and Admiral Komack has several loyal followers there. Admiral Pike would be the only member of the board willing to listen to Captain Winchester and he is currently visiting New Vulcan, which is out of transmission range."

"Yep, probably," Kirk replied distractedly. "Red alert, the Romulans just noticed. Prepare to nail the bastards. I want the Empire to remember this day."

The Enterprise was severely irritated.

The Romulans didn't stand a chance.

"Sir, we're being hailed by the Impala," Uhura reported as Romulan warbird debris floated mournfully in vacuum.

"On screen. Winchester, you just saved our asses!"

Captain Dean Winchester grinned and waved expansively. "Eh, it's all worth it just to see the Enterprise lay down smack. Look, you can fall at our feet in adoration later. Now that you've cleared out the pests, we're going to go warn Earth. Top speed of that bird is warp 8, right? You'll make Earth in eight hours."

Kirk scowled. "Yeah, but the neo-Narada will still arrive ahead of us. And we won't arrive in time. Earth won't get enough warning. Scotty?"

"Capt'n, Ah'll get you warp 9 if it kills me and the lady. We've got a smatterin' of revenge tae dish out and we cannae do that if we're late!"

Winchester smirked. "The Impala will make it in time. And there are enough Miranda-class ships floating around Earth to mount a defence capable of stalling that beast. I assume it's a fake, so it'll just be a giant warbird in terms of offence and defence, right?"

Kirk glanced over at Spock, who consulted his screen briefly. "Most likely, Captain Winchester. Our scans have indicated as such. There was also no sign of a cloaking device. Still, time is of the essence. The maximum warp of the Impala is listed as 9.2, correct?"

There were several titters from the Impala's bridge crew as her captain smiled like a fat cat with fresh cream. "We'll make it to Earth in 6.68 hours, gentlemen. Do try to keep up. Winchester out."

There was a pause on the Enterprise's bridge as everyone tried to figure out the Impala's top speed. Chekov whistled first. "Varp 9.6. Fastest ship in de fleet, including the experimental models."

Kirk was jealous. "Hey Scotty?"

"Absolutely not, Capt'n. We're far too big fer sommat like that. And Ah'm a miracle worker, but Bobby Singer is an engineering wizard."

"Damn."

"Sorry, Capt'n."

"Everyone has to have a dream. Sulu, maximum warp. Ladies and gentlemen, we're going to save the Earth. Again."


Impala

The bridge creaked alarmingly as Sam kept a very wary eye on their shields. "When we reach Earth, we are going to be dead in the water," he informed his crazy brother.

Dean shrugged. "Acceptable."

"Current speed is warp 9.65," Castiel stated, constantly making minor adjustments to keep the Impala from straying from her goal. Ash was for once completely focused, rerouting routines, shutting down nonessentials, juggling internal systems.

"Within hailing range of Earth, Captain," Sam reported.

"Get me Chandra Sam and don't take no for an answer."

Admiral Chandra's secretary did not want to let Commander Winchester, that insolent upstart, to talk to her boss.

Commander Winchester was very insistent and when she still said no, he remotely hacked her comm from his ship and popped up a polite greeting on Chandra's personal PADD.

"Captain Winchester?" An irritated admiral blinked onscreen, waving his PADD. "Care to explain why your first officer felt it necessary to hack my personal communications system?"

Dean had to swallow the bubble of pride threatening to spread a grin all over his face. Glancing sideways, the grin wanted to become a chuckle at the prim, grimly satisfied expression on his brother's face.

"Well sir, there's a Romulan copy of the Narada on our tails and it's going to arrive at Earth in…"

"Twenty six minutes, sir."

"Twenty six minutes. I imagine it's powered by the Enterprise's dilithium crystals, which has Captain Kirk very irritated. He'll be arriving as soon as he can, as we have provided him with replacement crystals. However, I suggest we prepare for imminent bombardment."

Admiral Chandra's mouth dropped open for a second before he regrouped. "Imminent…Captain Winchester, this is infamous – "

"Sir, does it look like I'm pulling a prank? I just put my ship through structural stress hell to get here and I'm sure Commander Winchester forwarded you the vid footage Enterprise gave us. I'm also aware that we commandeered four Constitution-class dilithium crystals from Starbase 11 and as a result of my actions I'll be facing a court martial. Admiral, I am deadly serious, as is Captain Kirk. I imagine the Romulans are as well."

The admiral blinked again, absorbing the information.

Then he took a deep breath and put Starfleet Command on red alert.


Enterprise

"Scotty, how's she doing?"

"Nae offence Capt'n but unless the nacelles fall off, Ah don't have time tae talk to ye!"

Kirk chuckled humourlessly and left his engineer to it.

Sulu and Chekov were sweating, struggling to fly the Enterprise as efficiently as possible so when they arrived at Earth they'd have enough juice left to fight.

Scotty shaved eight hours down to 7.3, determined to hit the 7.0 mark.


Impala

"Kirk, hurry the hell up," Dean cursed as his ship shook under bombardment. The neo-Narada may not have had the original's terrifying disruptor power, but the sheer number of arrays made the thing a formidable opponent and Starfleet desperately needed her flagship to arrive.

"Shields at 63% and dropping," Ash spat. Their own dilithium crystals were running low and Ash found himself surreally wishing he had picked up an extra power source at Starbase 11.

"Captain, we just lost the Mackenzie," Sam reported.

Castiel's fingers were flying, throwing the groaning Impala into a barrel roll that she simply wasn't built to take as the inertial dampers strained to keep up.

"Dammit Kirk," Dean swore again. "Fire all!"

"Shields at 12%, Captain. We took a direct hit on the port nacelle, power failing!"


Enterprise

The bridge was practically quivering under his feet and Kirk silently begged his best girl to hold on just a little longer.

"Arriwal at Earth in vone minute, ser!" Chekov exclaimed excitedly.

"Red alert, all hands to battle stations!" Kirk snapped out.

"Dropping out of warp in five, four, three, two, one," Sulu counted down.

Everyone except Spock and the captain winced or flinched in some way.

The space above Earth's atmosphere resembled the terrifying shrapnel field above Vulcan a mere eighteen months past.

"Evasive manoeuvres, Sulu! Chekov, get a lock on that thing and don't stop firing until it's space junk!"

One vital factor they had over last time – the crew was just that now, a crew instead of a group of terrified, blindly groping cadets.

Chekov and Sulu worked together in flawless tandem as Uhura monitored chatter, catching up on the pertinent battle details. Spock monitored shields and maintained power flow. The ship hummed viciously, Scotty and his mad minions coaxing hidden strengths from mere metal and energy.

And Kirk orchestrated it all like a victorious battle march, his ship swooping through space like an avenging angel. "You want someone to play, here we are," he muttered coldly.

They slammed the vessel with phaser fire until the poor banks overheated and Chekov was forced to put them on standby. There was a brief pause.

"Shields at 78%, captain. Phasers operative in one minute, thirty seconds," Spock called out and Uhura added "Sir, we're being hailed by the Romulan commander."

Kirk stood, striding to stand in front of the screen. His first officer stood in his customary position, solid as a rock at Kirk's back.

"On screen."

"Captain James T. Kirk," the commander drawled.

"I'm Captain James T. Kirk of the Federation starship Enterprise. You are within Federation space," Kirk stated as if the Romulan hadn't spoken at all, "and attacking Earth itself. This is a gross violation of Federation-Romulan treaties and we will respond as you have presented yourself – with extreme prejudice and force. Stand down now and we will consider your surrender." The words rang out like a hammer striking metal, hot and hard.

"This is the Narada and you know well its capabilities," the Romulan bluffed.

Kirk smiled a cold crocodile grin, all teeth. "Under my command, the Enterprise blasted the Narada into dust. I can spot a fake from parsecs away. Surrender now or be destroyed."

The Romulan regrouped. "It is you who will surrender or this vessel will begin to eliminate all the little ships it has left limping in space. At the very least, we will take them with us."

Kirk turned to his first officer. "Unfortunately sir, he has a point. Of twelve Miranda-class ships remaining, only three have shields. Five others are venting atmosphere and have been evacuated to the other ships in the area. Only two have weapons capability at present." Spock finished reciting, avoiding ship names.

The Romulan arrogantly waved at Kirk. "We will give you ten minutes to confer with your superiors on the planet below." The smug face disappeared from the Enterprise's view screen and Kirk swallowed a spike of rage.

"Ser," Chekov ventured. "I tink I hev an idea."

Everyone on the bridge turned to the brilliant Russian.

"Continue, Mr. Chekov."

"Ser, vhen ve vere stranded, Sulu and I anticipated something to dis effect. Ve took the liberty of marking de locations of all weapons banks on de ship. I hev been vriting a program capable of locking onto and eliminating all de disruptor banks facing us at present in under tree seconds. In the time it vould take de enemy ship to turn around, ve could recharge phasers and engage before de enemy fired on de other Federation ships, prowided de ship is focused only on us."

"Sir," Sulu jumped in, "if we had them convinced we were on say, a suicide run towards the ship, they would not have the time to fire on the smaller vessels in the area."

It was crazy.

Kirk liked it.

"Let's do it."


Impala

The Enterprise had arrived like a bolt out of the blue.

"They're a whole hour early!" Ash whooped as he slammed firing sequences into his console, Castiel struggling with failing controls, Dean barking orders left and right, the bridge electric with energy.

It was a beautiful sight, the vengeful flagship swooping in and hammering the Romulan invader with all the power the speedy little Impala lacked.

"Hold," Dean ordered to give his crew and ship a much needed breather.

They watched in awe as the Enterprise fired and fired and fired. "Shit, don't they have a limit?" Dean wondered aloud.

When the Enterprise finally paused, the neo-Narada had failing shields but the majority of her weapons were unharmed. "They're going to need another round to start doing system damage," Sam reported as the scans came in.

"Sam, can we listen in?" Dean asked.

Obligingly, the bridge was filled with the sounds of a very cold James Kirk promising to rain white-hot death and destruction on the invader.

Then the Romulan threatened to eliminate the smaller ships and Dean's shoulders slumped in resignation. "Prepare to divert all power to shields. We're going to dance around and make the best distraction. Hopefully that'll spare everyone else."

The bridge was sombre. Direct hits from disruptors of that power would rip the Impala apart in minutes.

Kirk had stopped broadcasting.

"Sir!" Castiel suddenly exclaimed and Dean stopped arguing with Bobby to stare.

The Enterprise was on a collision course with the neo-Narada, her phasers firing at an impossibly fast rate.


Enterprise

Kirk braced in his chair, clutching the arms and watching the view screen with the hungry concentration of a hunter.

"Neo-Narada starboard weapons banks disabled," Spock reported. "Phasers inoperative."

"Fire photon torpedoes. Make it count. Full impulse power."

The Enterprise ticked down the seconds as Sulu held course in what was quite possibly the galaxy's biggest game of chicken. Not even Spock's charge in the Vulcan science vessel against the real Narada compared.

"Hold," Kirk warned as the crew tensed. "Sulu, it's your call."

The pilot nodded sharply.

Time stood still as the big black monster grew larger and larger, closer and closer. Knuckles on the bridge whitened, eyes widened, lips compressed, everyone staring either at the opponent or the cool-as-ice pilot.

Then Sulu lashed out across the console and the Enterprise abruptly dipped downwards.


Impala

Sam Winchester came to the conclusion that Jim Kirk was crazier than Sam's idiot brother and that took some serious doing.

They watched with bated breath as the Enterprise charged, disruptor fire hammering off her shields like pattering rain as the neo-Narada struggled to roll around and bring the functioning disruptor side to bear.

"Come on," Dean muttered.

And in an impossible twist, a beautiful example of genius piloting, the Enterprise daintily spun on a dime, pirouetting just shy of the line of fire before unleashing a brutal salvo all along the neo-Narada's port side.

Back-pedalling, the Enterprise hopped out of range, hammering more destruction on the invader.

And then the neo-Narada exploded in a brilliant flower of fire and metal.

"Well, they're even more bat-shit insane than we are," Ash concluded in the heavy silence after the reds and oranges faded from the screen.


Enterprise

"Well done, everyone. Mr. Chekov, Mr. Sulu, inspired. Lieutenant Uhura, you have been invaluable. Scotty, you are a wizard on par with Lieutenant Commander Singer in my books. Damage report?" Kirk finished as he nodded to his first officer.

"Well Capt'n, Ah dinnae think she's forgiven me yet. We're gang tae need a week or so in space dock thanks tae that last go 'round."

"Understandable. Bones, report from sick bay."

"I'm busy Jim!" McCoy growled. "Less casualties than there could have been though. Check back in a few hours."

Kirk grinned, exhilaration humming through his nerves.

"Sir, Starfleet Command is hailing us and the Impala." Uhura blinked innocently. "Shall we experience communications trouble?"

"No thank you Lieutenant, that won't be necessary. On screen."

A very smoky, battered Impala bridge had Kirk wincing. Winchester seemed to be taking it philosophically though, yanking a dangling wire out of the ceiling and pitching it carelessly to the floor.

Admiral Chandra glared at the two captains for a brief second and then sighed. "Kirk, between you and Winchester, I'm going to suffer an aneurysm or something to that effect. You are very hard on my blood pressure."

"Apologies, sir."

"Well done, both of you. Winchester, I'm sure you'll be relieved to know that because you followed all the proper channels before you broke into a starbase and stole Starfleet material, you won't be facing court martial. I've made that very clear to Starfleet Command and we'll be looking into the protocols for this sort of thing so you don't have to become a repeat offender."

"Thank you sir. Appreciate it."

"Clean this mess up. I want your reports on my desk twenty four hours after space around Earth is clear. Chandra out."

There was a pause.

"Is it just me or is he getting better about this sort of thing?"

"I think he's getting used to it. You broke into Starbase 11?"

"Saved your ass, didn't I? And technically, Sammy's the thief. I never touched the crystals."

"Sam!" Kirk was thrilled. "I never knew you had it in you!"

Sam sputtered wordlessly for a moment before sniffing indignantly and returning pointedly to his work.

"Need a tow to space dock?" Kirk offered. "By the way, glad you're alive."

"No thanks and thanks," Dean replied dryly. "We're in the best shape of all the ships out here, except for your giant shiny ass."

"Hey, this gorgeous ship just saved your bacon. No insulting the girl."

"Sir," Spock interrupted just as Sam cleared his throat.

"Mothers are calling," Kirk sighed. "No rest for the righteous."


Clean up took eons longer than the actual battle. Enterprise was in high demand as a ferry, tow-truck and demolitions expert. However, Kirk made it very clear that if he caught any of the bridge crew, including her stubborn first officer, working before twelve hours of sleep had elapsed, he would condemn them to sick bay, where McCoy was in a cheerfully sadistic mood – he hadn't lost a single crew member this time.

The Impala was going to get a thorough refit, to Bobby's extreme satisfaction. Chekov put in a request to help Sam and Ash run the calculations for the new maximum speed. Kirk watched in amusement as the young ensign practically bounced on the spot describing the amount of fun involved before he shooed the Russian off to play amongst numbers.

Dean and Jim took both their strung-out engineers to get totally plastered on the best beer they could find. By the end of the night, the captains' pockets were significantly lighter but the engineers much more relaxed and forgiving, both of their idiot captains and themselves. And somehow both crews had managed to show up at the same location, clumping together companionably.

They ended up painting San Francisco flaming red in a glorious spree that left the Admiralty shocked and banishing both ships to opposite corners of the galaxy.

A memorial was held. Casualties had been less than the last major engagement over Vulcan and that was a step forward, but lives lost were lives lost, the grief real. Both Kirk and Winchester's crews showed up for the service without prompting

And Admiral Komack was in serious trouble, facing an inquiry as to why he ignored two captains, both of whom had made it a habit to save planets on a regular basis.

What more could a captain ask for?