Author's Note: All great writers create controversy. And if I'm any kind of writer at all, this will put me over the top. This is sure to be unlike any fanfic you've read, and if you don't like it, don't read it. Oh and Greg, don't reuse the same old garbage dump reviews, they get old. Also, I abhor fanfics that blatantly rip off other shows. And with that, I give you my blatant rip off of Doctor Who! (I don't own Doctor Who or Jimmy Neutron, but I do know Keith Alcorn.)
Timmy Turner's life was boring; it was as simple as that. He had fairy godparents, and unlimited supply of magical wishes, and everything he could possibly want (allegedly from the "internet"), but he basically had the same thing as everyone else: a boring school, boring friends, and a boring life. On this day Timmy came home and plopped down on his beanbag chair, too lazy to talk. He started playing his Crash Nebula videogame, which he usually did for around six or seven hours and then went to bed. But today, Timmy's plans would change…
Suddenly, a strange, oscillating sound filled the room, and the outline of a big blue box began to materialize out of nowhere. Timmy stared at the object, speechless, as it became fully visible. It seemed about the size of a phone booth and had the words "Police Public Call Box" written along the top. The door opened and the boy genius stepped out.
"Hey, Timmy," he said.
"…Neutron?"
Jimmy smiled, and Timmy still looked confused…
Jimmy Neutron
Timmy Turner
Through Time and Space
Roswell by Digger3000
"Neutron, what are you doing here? What is that thing?" Timmy asked, still having no idea what was going on.
"Oh, It's a spaceship. What do you think?" Jimmy replied.
"It looks like a…box!"
"Of course, a box is easier to park in someone's house."
"Ok…and what are you doing here?"
"Well, I was just about to do some uh, traveling. And I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come with me."
"You want me to go with you? Why?"
"I don't know, I thought it might be fun."
Timmy still had no idea what to say, so he said, "Uh, I can't. Yeah, you know, I got a lot of uh, homework to do."
Jimmy looked behind Timmy at the "homework" he was playing. He said, "…Ok, see your, Turner," and he returned to the police box.
About ten seconds passed and curiosity got the better of Timmy. He yelled, "Wait!"
"Yeah?" Jimmy said, poking his head out the door.
"Um, you really want me to go with you?"
"Sure, Timmy."
Timmy contemplated the decision he was about to make. He and Jimmy couldn't stay in the same room together for five minutes without fighting. How was he going to survive in a tiny box? Finally he blurted out, "Oh alright, I'll go."
"Great, come on in."
As Timmy started toward the box, he said, "Although, you could have made a bigger spaceship. Are we even gonna both fit in this" He was about to finish his sentence when he walked inside the box. But on the inside, the box wasn't a box… What Timmy had just walked into was a huge space, bigger than his bedroom. As he tried to wrap his brain around the idea of something bigger than his bedroom actually being in his bedroom, Timmy finally uttered, "thing?"
Jimmy smiled, "Does that answer your question?"
"How? What? Why?" Timmy stuttered, even more confused than before.
"Yeah, I thought that's how you'd react."
"So…your spaceship is…bigger on the inside than on the outside?"
"I call it the TARDIS, that stands for Time and Relative Dimension in Space. And yes, the inside occupies a different dimension than the outside, so it looks like it's bigger on the inside."
Timmy just stood there, staring blankly at Jimmy.
"Look," Jimmy said, "I know this is a lot to take in. You still want to come? Are you sure you won't get…time machine sick?"
Jimmy said the words 'time machine' and Timmy's short attention span kicked in, "Time machine? Cool!"
"Yeah, the TARDIS is a time machine."
"So where are we gonna go? I mean, when are we gonna go?"
"I was kind of thinking Roswell."
"What's Roswell?"
"You don't know what Roswell is? It was the most famous alleged UFO crash in history!"
"Come on, you don't believe in aliens, do you?"
"Oh I've seen them, but I want to know what really happened at Roswell."
Jimmy started to go to the control panel when Timmy stopped, "Wait…is it gonna be dangerous?"
"Probably."
Timmy smiled, "Great, let's go!"
Jimmy smiled back and ran to the control panel. In the center of the room, there was a huge tube surrounded by the control console. The console had every knob, button, switch, and lever imaginable. Jimmy manipulated the controls and entered the date, July 7, 1947. The tube in the center of the room moved up and down, and Timmy heard the same noise he heard when the TARDIS first appeared in his room. The TARDIS shook and vibrated slightly, and Timmy held on to the control panel. Finally all the motion stopped and Jimmy went to the TARDIS door.
"You coming?" He asked Timmy, who was still clinging to the console.
Timmy walked out of the TARDIS, "Wow…I don't think I'm in Dimmsdale anymore."
"Nope. Timmy Turner, welcome to Roswell, New Mexico, year 1947."
"Wow…so where do we go now?"
Jimmy took a small object out of his pocket. It was around the size of a pen and had a blue light on the end.
"What's what thing?" Timmy asked.
"It's a sonic screwdriver. It's kind of an all purpose scanner…thingy."
Jimmy moved the sonic screwdriver around in the air until he got a fix on the crash site, "This way, Timmy."
They went about a half a mile until they encountered a huge fenced off area with more guards than you could shake a…sonic screwdriver at.
"How are we gonna get in Neutron?"
"Simple, we're going to walk in. Follow me," Jimmy said walking up to the gate.
"What? They're not just going to let two kids in. Jimmy…?" Timmy followed Jimmy, even though he didn't understand his logic.
When they got to the gate, the guard said, "Are you kids lost?"
"No," Jimmy said, "We're part of the investigation." He took out a piece of paper and showed it to the guard.
"How old are you?" He asked.
"Uh…22. I have that disease that, you know, makes you look ten."
The guard stared at Jimmy for a second and said, "Fine, go on in. And what about the guy with the teeth, is he with you?"
"Yeah," Jimmy said, and he and Timmy entered the crash site."
"How'd you do that Jimmy?"
Jimmy showed Timmy the same piece of paper he'd just shown the guard, but it was completely blank. He answered, "It's psychic paper."
"Psychic paper?"
"Well, it's not really 'psychic.' It reads your brain waves and then says whatever you want it to say. It's the ultimate fake ID."
"And you invented it?"
"Yup."
"Then you must be like a genius or something."
Jimmy laughed, "Yeah, something like that. Now come on, let's go find the debris before they figure out we're fake and throw us out of here."
"Do you really think we'll find aliens out here?"
"I don't see why the government would work so hard to cover something up unless aliens were involved."
Jimmy and Timmy arrived at a pile of debris and, after showing psychic paper to the appropriate people, got to work examining it. Jimmy ran the sonic screwdriver over the material a few times and looked at the result.
"Wow," he said, probably not realizing he'd said it out loud, "this material is incredible."
"What is it?" Timmy asked.
"Memory metal, watch," Jimmy took a sample of the metal and crushed it in his hands. When he unfolded his hands, the metal returned to its original shape. "It's completely indestructible."
"Completely?"
"Almost completely. It would take an incredible amount of force to destroy this stuff. A lot more force than it sustained when it crashed."
"So you're saying someone shot it down?"
"Hmm…maybe. But by who…or what? Well, we're not going to find out anything standing around here. According to the reports, some people said they saw alien bodies…" Jimmy scanned the area with the sonic screwdriver again, "that way!"
Jimmy ran off in the direction of the alien bodies. Timmy stayed behind with the memory metal, partially for scientific study and partially because it was fun wan watching it go back to its original shape. Before long, a guard came up to him.
"Excuse me, what's your name," he asked.
"Um, Timmy Turner."
"Right, right, you're with the guy with the big hair."
"Uh huh."
"Problem is there's no Timmy Turner on the list of assigned investigators."
Timmy froze, he said, "Um…maybe I'm under…'John Smith?'"
"Yeah, or maybe you're under arrest. Cuff him!"
Another guard came out of nowhere and handcuffed Timmy. They threw him in the back of truck and drove back to their makeshift headquarters. Meanwhile, Jimmy was scanning the alien bodies with the screwdriver.
"Wow, these really are alien bodies, Timmy…Timmy? Ah, he's probably playing with the memory metal," he went back to scanning the bodies, "Hmm, these are relatively unsophisticated aliens."
Then a guard approached him and asked "What's your name?"
"Uh…John Smith?"
"Save it!" the impatient guard yelled, throwing cuffs on Jimmy and loading him in a truck.
Back at the military base, the guard was busy grilling Timmy.
"So, you want to tell me how you got in here?" he asked.
"Why are you yelling at me? I'm only ten!"
"Oh really? Because you're friend said you were twenty-two! Now you want to play the little lost child? Why don't you tell me what you're really doing here?"
"I'm not doing anything here! I was just…I was just looking around."
"Yeah, you mean spying!"
"I wasn't spying! I'm just a kid!"
The guard slammed his hands down on the table, "Listen to me, 'kid!' They are going to be picking your bones out of the sand if you don't tell me what you know! Who are you working for?"
Just then, the other guard walked in with Jimmy in handcuffs. "Hey, I got the other one."
The guard took a break from berating Timmy and looked Jimmy over. Then he said, "…Throw them both in the cell."
The other guard obeyed and put Jimmy and Timmy in a jail cell.
"So…how's it going?" Jimmy asked Timmy.
"Having a good time, I've never been arrested before! How do I explain getting arrested sixty years before I'm born?"
"I know, I know. Listen, I'm gonna get us out of here."
The guard who was yelling at Timmy came to the cell and said, "Hey, shut up in there! One more word and you're dead, you got it?" Jimmy and Timmy didn't answer, "Good. I'm Captain X by the way, so if you need anything, well, too bad!"
Captain X went to the other side of the room and Timmy started to ask how Jimmy planned to get out of this, but Jimmy shushed him just in time. He took out the psychic paper and showed it to Timmy. Since it said whatever the person holding it was thinking, they could use it to communicate with each other.
"I have a plan," Jimmy said via psychic paper.
"Great, what is it?"
"Ok, here's what we do. We'll start talking."
"Jimmy, weren't you listening? He said he'll kill us if we say another word."
"Timmy, just trust me ok? I know what I'm doing."
"Ok, I hope you do."
Jimmy put the psychic paper back in his pocket and said, "Hey Captain X, can you come here for a minute?"
Captain X got up an came over to the cell, "I thought I told you, one more word and you're dead!" He took out a gun and came in the cell.
"Hold on," Jimmy said, "I just wanted to tell you I get it, I understand. I know why you're doing this."
"What are you talking about?"
"I think you know. I know about the aliens."
"There are no aliens!"
"Really? Because there seems to be some pretty tight security around here just to guard a weather balloon.
"Incase you forgot, I'm still holding a gun at you!" Captain X said.
"But there's one thing that doesn't make any sense. Why does the government have to hide the fact that they know aliens exist? Especially these aliens, the bodies out there are one of the least advanced species in the galaxy. Unless you don't just know about them."
"You should really stop talking now!" An increasingly nervous Captain X said.
"It took an incredible amount of force to destroy the alien ship out there, and nothing on Earth could produce that much force. But you didn't use anything from Earth did you?"
"I don't know what you're talking about!"
"I'm talking about when you shot down that alien ship! That's what you're covering up. Not the fact that you know aliens exist, but that you stole their technology! You stole their technology so you could shoot them out of the sky!"
Captain X slowly lowered his gun, "We thought they were a threat."
"So you murdered them! They got a little too close to your airspace so you murdered them! And now you're threatening to murder anyone who find out about it!"
"We can't let anyone find out we have this technology." He raised his gun again, "And the last time I checked, you're still in a jail cell."
"And the last time I checked…" Jimmy took Timmy's hand, "so are you."
Jimmy and Timmy ran out of the jail cell. Captain X tried to follow, but Jimmy pushed a button on the sonic screwdriver and remotely closed the cell door. Then they ran out of the building and back to the TARDIS.
"So we're just going to leave him there?" Timmy asked as Jimmy was locking the TARDIS door.
"Someone will find him eventually."
"And we're just going to let them keep all that alien technology? Shouldn't we do something?"
"We didn't come here to change history, Timmy, we just came here to learn what really happened."
"Oh…ok."
"Look, I'm sorry I brought you here. I almost got you killed."
"Are you kidding? This was the most fun I've had in months! Besides, you said it would be dangerous."
"Oh yeah. Hey, I'm glad you decided to come with me."
Timmy smiled, "Thanks for inviting me."
"I just thought maybe if we spent some time together we could get to know each other better. You're a really cool guy and I treated you like a jerk."
"Yeah, but I was kind of a jerk."
"How about we just put everything behind us. What do you say? Friends?" Jimmy put his hand out.
Timmy smiled and shook Jimmy's hand, "Friends."
"Great," Jimmy said, smiling back. Then he went back to the TARDIS control console. "So Timmy, do you think you're ready for another trip through time and space?"
"You bet, Jimmy!" They both smiled as Jimmy entered the date for their next destination, 2500 BC…
Next Time…
Jimmy: "You know, some people think aliens helped the Egyptians build the pyramids."
Timmy: "You don't believe that, do you?"
Jimmy: "Actually, it's entirely possible."
-
Jimmy: "Um, this isn't supposed to be happening! This is impossible…"
