Disclaimer: Charmed does not belong to me! Sad face!

Paige tried so hard to push past her feelings and help her sister with the new baby, she had tried for the past two weeks but something inside her broke every time she saw those perfect green eyes – she couldn't even hold him, her own nephew and Paige couldn't even comfort him when he cried.

She wanted to, she wanted nothing more than to connect with that little cutie and watch him grow into the caring, neurotic young man she knew he would be, she wanted to be able to cuddle him and spoil him like any good auntie would but… her mind wouldn't allow her.

All she could remember was Chris dying, fading away and her not being able to do a damn thing to help him and that was probably the worst thing – the fact that she stood there, like a useless statue as her own flesh and blood suffered so much pain, it made Paige feel hollow inside just thinking about it.

The baby's wails then filled the air, the shrilling noise piercing through Paige's skull. Should she comfort him? Would she be able to? Could she do it? Standing on shaky legs Paige walked through to the living room, her posture looking so small and defeated. Piper was passed out on the sofa, wrapped up in a deep green blanket. Paige loathed to have to wake her up, the sleepless nights were catching up on her. So, nodding to herself she tip toed forward and leaned over the bassinet – and immediately a ton of emotions hit her at once.

She felt such love for her nephew but also a great sense of loss, pain, grief and hopelessness – she didn't think she would be able to comfort him, not yet, it was just too soon. She couldn't look at him and not see big Chris she just couldn't – and she understood why Leo was having such great difficultly too, it just hurt too much, the memories make Paige want to physically sick.

Paige was just about to turn away when the baby moaned and hiccupped, the cute little noise piercing through Paige's fogged up brain – maybe she should help him out, just this once, because if she walked away she would be the worst auntie ever.

So, taking a deep calming breath she walked back to where the baby was crying and leaned over the bassinet, putting on a small smile and picking him up gingerly, supporting his head.

"Shhh its okay, it's okay" She cooed, bobbing him up and down in her arms. His chubby little face smoothed out and peered up at her, mouth pinched together. Paige sucked in a breath – his eyes, those unmistakable bottle green eyes looked at her with so much love and trust she found it hard to breathe.

Along with that though there was something else, something so similar in those large green eyes that reminded her of the other Chris it brought tears to her eyes – why did she have to lose him? Didn't they deserve to at least have some happiness? Sniffling quietly to herself she wiped a tuft of hair away from his forehead, caressing the soft skin.

Maybe, just maybe, it wasn't so difficult after all.

Maybe, it would help her move on.

And maybe, she would be able to get past this rut she had been in ever since that fateful day.

Wiping a lone tear from her cheek she brought Chris closer to her chest, snuggling him like a child would a teddy bear – she could feel them bonding already and chastised herself for not doing this sooner. He was just an innocent little baby, she didn't need to punish him for something that was not his fault.

She may have lost the other Chris but she got him back just a few hours later and Paige would make sure she would never lose him again – because this little baby she was holding, snuggled contently in her arms, meant more to her than her own life.

"It's okay Chris I've got you, I've got you" She reassured, settling Chris down immediately and Paige sung him to sleep, watching as his eyelids fluttered shut and his small, fragile hand clasped onto her jumper like a lifeline.

Hope you enjoyed – should I continue?reviews appreciated! :) xx