Part 1: Tale Upon A Midnight Clear
By: Lindsey
PART 1
There was a knock at the door. His eyelids opaque to the darkness that enveloped them cracked open to welcome the night into his azure eyes. The only light apparent was the light emanating from the bathroom two doors away. He always kept this light on, It having been his savior so many fruitless nights in which he had stumbled out of bed half-asleep when nature had called to him.
"Always at the oddest times of night," he had often muttered aloud to himself.
Niles Crane talked to himself an awful lot these days. He had other vices however. He drank too much sherry, read a lot of Jung, and attended the opera an indecent amount of times during the week. Perhaps confiding in his brother more times than necessary, was also not to his benefit. But these vices were irrelevant to his current situation for they had been there for him for more years then he could count. He had only recently began to converse with him, himself, and he. Frasier, the true Freudian that he was, would just hypothesize that it had to do with his early childhood and his having an elder more outgoing brother. Niles hated Frasier sometimes.
Love, however, was the main feeling that he felt for his brother, though. How could you not love your own blood, for they may have hurt you in the past, may have put a damper on some of your conquests, well mainly One for Niles, but in the end there have been more support than unkindness. A shoulder to cry on. A date for the opera. A fellow sherry drinker. In fact, if you listed Niles Crane's vices in a row, they would all link to Frasier.
The silhouette of a once sane man began to slowly plod down the staircase in his silk robe and bed slippers. The robe had come from Victoria's Secret, but Niles had never shared that secret with anyone for it was embarrassing and why should anyone have to know? It was the most comfortable robe that he had ever slipped into. His shadow reached the bottom of the stairs before he did for the harsh fluorescent of the bathroom barely lit up the midnight blue in his garment.
"Coming," he said aloud after another knock had been prominently placed onto his door. "Mrs. Benny, I'm sorry if my ocean sounds have been disturbing you, but honestly they have not reached the sound decibel in which you need to wake me at 3:45 in the morning." He had proven his point, but felt the need to continue, "but if you wish for me to explain this again, I will," Niles stopped as he opened the door.
There she stood, her lips pressed firmly together and her jaw clenched tight. Her cheeks were rosy with the sudden warmth of entering from the bitter cold that was the outside temperature.
"Dr. Crane," she whispered, "I'm sorry to wake you at this hour, but I need to talk to someone."
"Daphne!" Niles exclaimed, perhaps a little too loudly because he awkwardly changed to his normal baritone, "…um, please, come in."
Niles had regressed from a distinguished early forties gentleman to a gangly, awkward preteen boy. He attempted to recover his inelegance, "Would you care for some tea?"
"Um, no thank you…well I suppose I could have a bit, just nothing with caffeine please, I'm already having a hard of enough time falling asleep," Daphne chortled. Was it Daphne that was regressing this time? "As I said before, I am sorry to come over here at such a late hour."
"Oh, it's alright, I was up already," Niles replied thinking to himself, "Liar, liar, liar!"
"Liar," Daphne giggled, "but I thank you for being so sweet to say that." She slightly tapped his hand in a playful slap.
Niles retreated to the kitchen and began to boil the water. He called, "Oh, and in response to your quandary, none of my tea has caffeine; it is all herbal." He re-entered into the living room. Daphne had taken a seat onto Niles' Victorian fainting couch, so Niles took the advantage and sat next to her. She smelled of must and almond for the mix of sleet and rain, or "reet" as Niles had called it as a child, had formed into quite of a torrential downpour. At this Niles, gazed out the window, "It's really coming down out there, do you think that it might snow soon?"
"That would be beautiful," Daphne observed in a far away manner. They both sat quiet for a moment and listened to the faint pecks of little ice pellets falling against the window pane. It was almost as if some neighborhood kids were engaging in a snowfight directly outside the window and had missed each other one too many times. The pelting soon was drowned out by the slow increase in volume of a shrilling approaching from the kitchen.
"Tea's on," Niles said and got up from the couch.
"What was that?" Daphne said in a kind of haze. "The tea…oh…yeah," she muttered. "I must really be a mess if I can't even remember the sound of a teapot boiling," she laughed a little and then was quiet.
Niles knew that something was wrong, but he figured that he wouldn't mention anything until Daphne said something first; he was enjoying this moment of them sitting there listening to the sounds of the outside world. Alone. But he knew that it wouldn't last, for he was sure that Daphne was just seeking a little comfort from a friend and nothing else. How many times, Niles had dreamed, had fantasized about the two of them cuddling together in front of a fire on the couch just looking into each other's eyes realizing that they both felt the same for each other. A wisp of hair would fall over her eyes that had a reflection of the fire and he would brush it away with a touch. How he wished that she had the same dreams about him. But in vain, all she felt was comfort in him, trust, a true friend. He supposed that he could live with that if it always stayed like that, and no man ever came into the picture, but that reality was an unreality. Still, she was there with him, alone, in his apartment at 4:10 in the morning and they had been sitting in front of the fire listening to the sounds of the outside world. The surreal aspect of this hit Niles very quickly and he felt light-headed.
"Are you ok in there, Dr. Crane?" Daphne called from the other room.
"Dr. Crane," he muttered to himself. His fantasy broken. "Yeah, I'm fine, I was just letting the tea steep a little longer." Niles had just recomposed and was unaware that Daphne had appeared just behind him.
"Are you sure you don't need anything?" Daphne asked. Niles dropped a teacup onto the floor. "Oh, I am so sorry, Dr. Crane. I didn't mean to startle you."
Niles began to pick up the glass shard off the floor, "Oh it's alright, I just haven't completely woken up yet I suppose." At that, Niles grabbed his finger in pain, and the blood began to trickle very lightly from the slit on his pinky.
"Oh! Here, let me help you with that," Daphne insisted as she grabbed a towel and compressed it onto his finger for a few seconds. As she held his hand, she noticed that he was quivering slightly. "You're trembling? Is something wrong?"
"No," he gazed into her eyes, "I'm fine, it's just a little cut." Daphne pulled the towel off for a second at which Niles took one look at a miniscule drop of blood and passed out.
Niles awoke to Daphne's face looming over his, "Is this a dream?" he thought to himself.
"Oh thank god, I was really worried for a second there."
"Oh, oh…it's just, it's the sight of blood. I can't stand the sight of blood," Niles said quickly. Daphne reached into a drawer and took out a bandage and placed it over his finger.
"There," Daphne smiled, "now you won't have to see it." All of a sudden, Daphne kissed his finger. The warmth from the touch of her lips had sent a shiver up Niles' spine. "Does that make it better?" Daphne said in a babying voice.
"Oh yes," Niles exclaimed still trying to recover from the excitement.
Daphne picked up the tea tray and they moved their little soiree back to the couch.
"Shall I put on some music?" Daphne inquired, her jaw completely relaxed.
"Yes, that would be nice," Niles responded, very much in heaven. Not that he actually believed that anything would happen between the two of them, for she had in fact come to him in crisis, and he was not going to take advantage of her. However, just being with Daphne delighted him. And who knew what the night would bring!
1 Part 2- tale upon a midnight clear
Daphne plodded over to the stereo and put in a cd, "I hope this is alright…" Daphne said.
"Oh, I'm sure it will be lovely," Niles said with a bit of terror in his voice. He had not listened to Daphne's music that often, and really didn't know what to expect.
"As long as it isn't polka," Niles thought to himself.
"It's polka music," Daphne triumphed, "You do like polka don't you?" Niles' jaw slowly dropped and he tried to cover his horror.
"Um, polka, well yes, I…" he began to stammer as Daphne burst into laughter.
"I was just kidding, Dr. Crane. I know how much you hate polka, I never cared for it myself. It's an old jazz compilation of mine, mainly composed of Frank Sinatra. It makes me miss my brother Billy, the ballroom dancer. He and I used to dance to 'Luck Be A Lady' and 'Some Enchanted Evening'. You know, Billy once met Ol' Blue Eyes…we went to this show in…"
Niles studied Daphne's face as she excitedly told her story about when she was a little girl and he wished that he could be in her world for just a moment. To have those memories at such a close reach. To have those memories at all. He wished that he had known Daphne as a girl; would they have been friends? Maybe he would have had more guts to ask her out had he been younger and without a Maris to have broken him of all his securities that he had previously had. Niles pondered this and realized that he must have been daydreaming for when he refocused, Daphne was staring at him.
"Dr. Crane, would you?"
"Would I what?" Niles said sheepishly.
"Care to dance," was Daphne's reply.
"I would love to," Niles said in his charming boyish tone. Daphne extended her hand and Niles took it graciously. "Oh what memories this brings back," Niles smiled.
"The snow ball was so glamorous. I have to admit that that was the most fun I have had in quite a long time, especially the part about making all those snobs rethink their opinions." Daphne put her head on Niles' shoulder and began to sing the words to the song aloud, "It's not the pale moon, that excites me. That thrills and delights me, oh no. It's just the nearness of you." At that, Daphne had looked directly into Niles' eyes.
His heart beat a mile a minute. He felt as if he would faint, was it just the moment or was that a look of amore in Daphne's eyes. He could feel his body moving unconsciously closer to her. His mind was racing, "This is wrong this is wrong no no no what are you doing niles wake up niles this is not the time you can't take advantage of this creature so lovely this is wrong no no no." He could no longer control his body as he wrapped his arms completely around hers, and there faces were so close that he was breathing her breath. He so wanted to feel the touch of her warm lips pressed against his, but his instincts finally kicked in and he put his head against her neck and smelled her hair instead. His breathing had quickened, and he was sure that Daphne must have noticed, but she continued to sing quietly.
"When you're in my arms, and I feel you so close to me. All my wildest dreams come true," Daphne mused. At this Niles lifted his head from her neck and began to sing to her as well,
"I need no soft lights to enchant me. If you'll only grant me the right to hold you ever so tight, and to feel in the night the nearness of you," they both stopped.
"Dr. Crane, you have the most beautiful singing voice. I wish you would sing more often," Daphne said.
"Well, I don't as often feel the need to." Niles replied as they continued to dance until the last remnants of the piano had faded.
When the song stopped, both Niles and Daphne stood there in silence and then much to Niles' dismay, Daphne broke the moment by saying,
"Um…so, Dr. Crane, the reason I came over here was…"
"Oh yes, what seems to be troubling you," Niles said in a business- like voice. They both sat down on the couch.
"You see, well, Donny has been wanting to push up the wedding date, and…" Daphne continued.
"Donny," Niles sighed to himself. Donny had been Niles' lawyer during his divorce from Maris, and in his excitement from the settlement, Niles had neglected to notice that Daphne had taken a shine to Donny. To his dismay, Donny had proposed to her and because of some advice Niles had given to Daphne, she accepted. Niles despised Donny more than anyone else he knew except for one person, himself. He had let Daphne get away. He could of told her, but he didn't and he knew that he would regret it for the rest of his life.
"…and I just don't think I'm quite prepared for it," Daphne finished.
Niles had been only partially listening to Daphne's tale of woe and solemnly replied, "I understand."
"But what should I do," Daphne inquired helplessly, "I do love Donny and I don't know why I wouldn't want to get married to him as soon as possible. Usually when you love someone so much, you want to be with them as soon as possible, and I don't know why I am having doubts. Oh, I just don't know what to do, Dr. Crane."
"Doubts?" Niles thought to himself and then decided to say it aloud.
"Well, you know I have these visions, and yes I know you think that they are ridiculous, but I just can't shake the feeling that I am making a mistake," Daphne said.
"On the contrary, I don't think that they are ridiculous at all," Niles said, though he was lying through his teeth and he corrected himself. "It's not necessarily the visions that I think is the problem here, it seems to more be the feeling. The kind of gut feeling you get when you know that something is wrong, or something is missing," he paused, "I get that feeling all the time."
"You do?" Daphne asked delicately.
"All the time. I've been missing something for seven years now, but I've just learned how to cope with it. Sometimes, you just learn to cope with things." Niles shuddered at what he had just said. He basically had told Daphne that she should definitely stay with Donny because he had learned to cope with his feelings and so should she.
"Why am I always helping their relationship? I should just shut up!" Niles thought to himself. He dreaded that she would tell him that he was correct.
"I guess you're right," Daphne resigned.
Niles thought about it for a second and then stated, "No. No, I'm not. You shouldn't just learn to deal with things. You should do something about them. It's too late for me, but you can still have what you want. Listen to me Daphne, listen to your heart. If Donny is the man for you, then so be it, but if you are having too many doubts then think about this: what will you do once you are married if you are having this many doubts now?"
"You were the one who advised me to accept, Dr. Crane," Daphne retorted.
"I know, and I didn't realize that I was doing it at the time, and I'm sorry. But you are sure about Donny, so there shouldn't be a problem." Niles was beginning to get sick of hearing Donny's name.
"It's just, he's has so many ideas of exactly what HE wants for the wedding, and how it will fit into HIS schedule, I don't think that he has given a thought to what I have said," Daphne said angrily.
"Well, if I was your fiancé, I would certainly listen to what you had to say. The whole idea of marriage is uniting, compromising, doing things together. You become one. If it was us, we would be NilesDaphne, having one heart, but still having two different souls, you wouldn't go from being Daphne to Niles, now would you?" Niles stopped, "I'm sorry, it's 5:30 in the morning and I am not making any sense, am I?"
"Actually, that was beautiful, you have made a lot of sense. Thank you Dr. Crane." Daphne peered out the window, "oh, how beautiful. The sun is just beginning to rise, Dr. Crane, come here."
Niles walked over to the window and stood by her side, "It is lovely, not as lovely as you of course," Niles regretted saying that aloud. He must have really been delirious.
"Thank you, Niles."
"Was she blushing? Did she just call me Niles?" Niles thought to himself. Daphne reached down and took Niles' hand into hers, and he thought that he would faint.
"Well, thank you so much for your help, and I am so sorry that I came over so late at night. You are such a wonderful friend." At this Daphne kissed Niles quickly on the lips and started for the door, "I'll see you tomorrow. Or today rather!" she giggled.
Niles speedily walked to the door to open it for her and as she was leaving he hugged her and said, "Goodnight Daphne, the blue in Apollo's eyes."
"Goodnight," she said, and it was over. The door had closed and Niles was once again alone.
Niles stood by the door, his heart beat slowing. His eyes fluttered for a second and then closed as he breathed in the leftover wafts of Daphne's shampoo. He walked over to the table and picked the remnants of what had been left of their tea party. There was a smudge of Daphne's lipstick on one of his teacups and he wished that he could never wash it again, but to his own sensibility, he took it to the kitchen and set it in the sink to be washed. The taste of Baby Kiss was still on his lips where Daphne had planted it.
Peering at the floor, he realized that there was still a little shard of glass the teacup had shattered, and he had a sudden vision of Daphne's face over his as he had awoken. If only he could awake to that face every morning. Niles looked at the clock, it was 6:15 am and his first appointment was at 9. He was about to go to bed when he reached down to pick up the glass and threw it in the trash. There was a spot of blood dried on the floor and Niles wiped it up with a dishrag. He didn't faint, he didn't even feel light-headed because it is only the sight of fresh, flowing blood that his body rejected.
Niles turned off the lights in the kitchen and headed up to his bedroom. Upon reaching his bed he disrobed and sat on his Sealy Posturepedic, contemplating the night, however he could barely move for lack of sleep. He went to reach for the lamp switch and hit his pinky against the night shade.
"Ouch!" he said and lifted his bandaid up. It was still bleeding a little, so Niles finally passed out for the night.
1.1 PART 3: THE MORNING AFTER
Niles awoke tangled in the covers looking as if his neck was broken. He could barely move his neck from the stiffness. He attempted to massage it himself, but to no avail. He stumbled down the stairs to make his coffee and to take some aspirin. Aspirin and coffee, breakfast of champions. He felt as if he had the worst hangover that had ever existed, but he realized that he had to get through the rest of the day, so he took his shower and dressed in his work suit and headed out the door.
Meanwhile, Daphne awoke with a start. She realized that she needed to have a discussion with Donny today about what she and Dr. Crane had talked about. She couldn't marry this man unless he understood how she felt and was going to respect her as she respected him. However, that level of respect had been dissipating quickly. She dressed in her robe and walked into the living room where Frasier and Martin were already sitting at the table drinking coffee and eating breakfast.
"Well, look what the cat dragged in," Martin laughed, "You must have been up late with Donny last night…" Martin smirked.
"Ah, the lovebirds, so how is Donny?" Frasier inquired.
"Before you answer that Daphne, I would just like to add to feel free not to talk about it," Martin interrupted.
Daphne didn't want to meet either of their expressions so she quietly answered, "um…yes…Donny." She hurried off into the kitchen.
Frasier leaned in closer to his father and whispered, "Daphne is acting rather strangely this morning. Do you think that she and Donny got into a fight?"
"Now, Fras, it's Daphne's relationship, so it's Daphne's problem. We don't need to get into this with her. So let her do the talking and let's not bring this up again."
"Alright Dad, I see your point. It's just that it's obvious something's wrong…" Frasier said.
"Well then let Daphne tell us if she wants to," Martin cautioned. "End of story."
"What story?" Daphne said as she walked back into the living room. She was holding a cup of coffee in one hand and a Danish in the other.
"Oh, well Dad was just telling me about something that happened when he was on the force. Weren't you Dad?" Frasier inquired.
"Oh yeah, strange. It was…strange."
"Well, I want to hear about it," Daphne retorted.
"Um…well, it's really not that exciting, it was just a…um…a…uh" Martin started.
"Robbery," Frasier chimed.
"Yeah, a robbery, you see it wasn't very exciting. Well, Eddie looks like he needs to do his business so I'll be back. Frasier remember what the moral of that story was." Martin said definitively.
"Yes Dad, thanks." Martin called Eddie and they walked out the door. Daphne sat down at the table.
"Well, that was odd," she said, "what's the moral of the story?"
"Don't drink and steal. I must remember that," Frasier tapped his fingers impatiently, "Well I have to get down to the station, Roz will yell at me if I'm late again."
"But you don't have to be there for another 2 hours," Daphne said, puzzled.
"Well, I want to be there extra early, then…uh…Roz can't say I was late," Frasier looked very flustered as he basically made a run for the door. "See you later, Daph!"
And Daphne was alone. She wasn't completely alone, she had an old cup of lukewarm coffee and a prune Danish to keep her company, but even they could not prepare her for what she had to do today. She had to face Donny and give him an ultimatum. She hated ultimatums for than anyone she knew, but if he didn't start treating her with more respect, there was no way that she was going to marry this shell of a man. "Why can't he see it the way Dr. Crane does," Daphne asked in the general direction of her coffee mug. She wasn't talking to the mug, no. She never talks to inanimate objects much less herself. Oh who was she kidding, she was talking to a slab of glazed ceramic. "Well, they all think I'm a bit nutty, so who cares if you do too" Daphne triumphantly said to the French Roast. "I have to get out of here," Daphne thought so she headed for the door when she realized that she was still in her robe. "I must really be losing my mind," Daphne muttered as she headed for her bedroom to change.
Niles had not been very productive in his sessions thus far. During Miss Dryden's session he had almost had a nervous breakdown, while Mrs. Burton had practically put him to sleep. Needless to say, Niles needed someone to talk to.
He strode into Café Nervosa hoping to god that Frasier would be there. He saw him sitting at a table with Roz in the corner and he nodded recognition. He walked up to the counter and ordered his usual as Roz was just getting up to leave. Niles sat down across from Frasier, of course not without first wiping the chair perfectly clean.
"Hello Niles," Frasier warmly said. Niles quietly responded back with a quick hello. "Sit down…is something wrong?"
Niles pondered this comment for a moment and thought about the last 12 hours, "Well, it's about Daphne." And before he could finish what he was trying to say, Frasier cut in.
"Niles, I love you. You are my brother and I understand how much you love this woman, but you need to forget about her. You know that she's about to be married and you cannot continue to pursue this fantasy. You know when I was with Lilith, there was someone that…"
"Frasier, before you continue, I was not discussing with you my feelings about Daphne, I was merely attempting to say that she was having a problem." Niles interrupted.
"I thought something might be wrong, but Dad told me not to ask her anything about it. You see, she got up extremely late this morning and looked quite disheveled; in fact, she wouldn't look either me or Dad in the eye when she talked to us. I wonder if she and Donny had a fight late last night because I awoke around 2:45 in the morning to get some water and happened to catch a glimpse of her going out the door. I figured she was just going over to Donny's to have a discussion or something else that I really don't want to think about."
"Did you ask her if she was at Donny's last night?" Niles asked impatiently.
"Well, not in exact words, but it was implied, and she agreed that yes she had been at Donny's."
Niles looked astonished. "Well for your information, Frasier, she was not with Donny last night," he smirked.
Frasier looked very confused, "Well, then who was she with?" Niles raised an eyebrow sending chills down Frasier's spine, "Oh my god, what did you do to her?"
"How dare you suggest that I would take advantage of Daphne," Niles angrily spat, "I love her enough to have the sense not to screw up her life that much. But, oh mama, I was having a hard time restraining myself. It was beautiful, we danced, we had tea, and we watched the sunrise together. I will always remember the time we shared." Niles was no longer in Café Nervosa, he had wandered into some ethereal Daphneland again. Daphneland is like Disneyland, but with fewer rides.
"Niles. Niles!!!! Hey, snap out of it. Gain control of yourself," Frasier waved in Niles' face. "So just tell me one thing…why was Daphne even at your place last night?
"Donny. She was having a problem with Donny and came to ask my advice about it," Niles watched Frasier's face turn to horror, but he quickly jumped in, "and there's no need to worry because I assure you the advice I gave her would be what any friend would advise another friend to do. I didn't tell her to dump him or anything."
"Well, what's her problem with Donny?" Frasier inquired.
"Well, I can't go into specifics because that would be betraying her trust, and I just won't do that, but in a nutshell, she doesn't feel like Donny respects her." Niles said.
Frasier was confused. "How does she think that? The man is obviously head over heels for her."
"I can't discuss it," Niles looked at his watch, "Oh god, I have a session in 15 minutes, I have to go."
"Niles, wait!" Frasier said desperately. But he was gone. Frasier stared at his coffee cup for a minute and left as well, very confused about the whole situation. However, in Frasier's competitive state of mind, what baffled him the most was why she didn't come to him first. "The nerve of that woman," he scoffed as he left Café Nervosa for the day.
1.2 Part 4: a midnight summer's daydream
Daphne was tired. Tired of life, tired of arguing, tired of Donny. Needless to say, things did not go too well with her lawyer fiancé. The only consolation was that he had finally apologized to her for his actions. His actions! It wasn't just his actions that bothered her, it was what he thought of her. Daphne had come to the conclusion that Donny did not respect her in the least, and she was about ready to break it off with him. She thought that she could make him understand, and he thought he could understand.
She didn't know what to do, so she decided to go home, take a warm bath, give herself a mud mask, and drink some hot tea. Well maybe not tea, maybe some hard liquor would do it.
Daphne was not usually a sherry drinker, but Frasier and Martin, well even Eddie was out, so she helped herself to the contents of Frasier's sherry decanter and after she had had quite a few swigs, well more then a few, Daphne decided to skip the mud mask, hell, skip the warm bath and pass out on her bed.
Blue mist covered the atmosphere of the bar.
"Where am I?" Daphne wondered. It seemed that she was the only one in the joint for all the seats were empty and there was a very empty looking band playing a sort of blues/jazz set that would only be played in Seattle dive clubs downtown. Extraordinarily, the bartender was still serving drinks to invisible people it seemed, so Daphne approached the bar.
"I'd like a vodka martini, extra dry," Daphne ordered.
"Coming right up," the bartender replied. The ambience of the place almost seemed like a moment that she had seen in the film, 'The Shining,' but she decided not to overanalyze the situation. Upon receiving her martini she walked back into the center of the room and noticed that a figure had appeared at the door. She could tell that it was a man, but couldn't make out the face until he was a foot away from her.
"Donny!" Daphne practically shouted, "What are you doing here?" For one, she didn't know how she got to this bar or why no one was there, but what made her even more curious was why Donny was there. He looked at her lovingly and his lips began to move as if he was saying something to her, but she couldn't hear anything he said. It was as if he had become mute and did not even know it himself.
"Donny, I can't hear you. What are you saying?" Daphne asked frantically. He touched her face and then kissed her cheek and in the same amount of time that he had been there, he was gone. Back into the mist, enveloped by the shadows, completely gone from sight. Daphne gulped down her martini and chewed on the olive. The music had begun to play louder and Daphne's entire body had begun to sway back and forth, a motion that she was unable to control. As her body swayed more and more the lights changed more into a kind of greenish tint and she ran up to the bar to get another drink.
"Another martini, vodka, extra dry," Daphne chattered. As she lifted the martini glass to her lips, her hands began to tremble, and all of a sudden there was a hand on her shoulder.
"Why are you trembling, love?"
"Billy! What the bloody hell are you doing here? Did you meet Donny, he was just…here." Daphne said, very confused. Why was her brother at this bar? Shouldn't he be at home in Manchester?
"Something told me that I should come over here and ask you to dance. Remember how we used to dance when we were kids?" At this, Billy took the martini glass out of her hand and set it on a table that had just appeared there.
"But…" Daphne began, but Billy interrupted her.
"No talk. Let's just dance, like it used to be." So they danced for what seemed like hours until Daphne realized that she was dancing by herself, the mist even thicker than before. She could not even see the bartender anymore and the room had become red, a fiery red, and she was beginning to sweat through her…oh my god, she realized that she was completely and utterly naked! She tried to cover herself, but there was nothing to cover herself with, but she finally gave up because she figured that if she couldn't see anyone, then no one could see her. The music had become so loud at this point that she had begun to see the vibration of the percussion in the mist. The volume grew until all of a sudden, it just stopped. The mist cleared, she could see again, and she all of a sudden remembered that she was naked, that the mist no longer covered her. However, when she looked down at herself, she realized that she was wearing her favorite red dress. She peered around the room for any sign of someone, but it seemed empty, until she looked at the bar. There was someone there. A figure, a man, dressed nicely in a hand-stitched jacket and matching pants. There was something about him though because he looked very sad, very sullen as if he had just lost someone that he deeply cared about. She approached the man and sat down beside him when she realized that it was Niles.
"Dr. Crane! What are you doing here?" Daphne inquired.
"I'm sorry, have we met?" Niles asked. Needless to say, Daphne was shocked. This man that had been her dear friend for over 7 years did not even know who she was. Did he have amnesia, or was he just playing some kind of sick joke?
"Dr. Crane, it's me…D…D…" She couldn't say her name. She couldn't tell him who she was. She didn't understand. Perhaps she didn't even know who she was, but he knew her better than anyone, more than herself, why couldn't he figure out who she was?
"I'm sorry that I don't remember you, where do we know each other from? Have you visited my offices before?" Niles inquired.
"No." Daphne said hesitantly. "I can't believe you don't remember me."
"I'm terribly sorry, perhaps my mind is too clouded from the amount of liquor that I have consumed." He looked down at his glass of sherry and she noticed a small tear stream down his cheek. She decided to forego all the confusion that was besetting her and find out what had happened to him.
"Excuse me for asking, but what's wrong?" Daphne asked. Niles didn't speak for a moment, but then looked up.
"Well, I probably shouldn't be talking about this, but there is this woman. This extraordinarily beautiful goddess that I am in love with." Niles mused. Daphne noticed another tear begin to form in his eye. "And she doesn't love me." Daphne's mind began to race. Who could Niles possibly be in love with that would tear him apart this way?
"How do you know that she doesn't love you?" Daphne asked.
"Well," Niles' voice choked, "you see, she is getting married very soon and I am sure that she doesn't love me."
"You mean, she hasn't TOLD you that she doesn't love you? Because if she hasn't, then why…" Daphne said.
"No, she hasn't told me that she doesn't love me, well the thing is is that, well it's that, well…I've never told her that I love her." Niles said quietly.
"Why haven't you?" Daphne asked, obviously still oblivious of whom Niles was speaking of.
"I don't know. It could be because I'm afraid of rejection…I love her so much, and I suppose that I would rather love her from afar then know that she doesn't love me." He began to cry.
"Well, if you want my opinion, I think that you should tell her anyway. She could be making a mistake. Maybe there are doubts in her mind about the man that she is marrying. Maybe she doesn't really love him. Maybe she loves you." Daphne did not understand what had just come out of her mouth, but she let it go.
"I just can't deal with that chance of rejection. I just can't do it."
"Well, what's her name?" Daphne asked.
Niles paused for a moment, his eyes lighting up, "Her name is…Daphne."
Daphne awoke with a jerk. "What was that?!"
1.2.1 PART 5: there's something about unicorns
Needless to say, Daphne was confused. Although the level of difficulty in the interpretation of her dream may have been like tying one's shoe to someone else, Daphne was not convinced. She had no inkling whatsoever of Niles' feelings for her, except that he loved her as a friend, a very good friend, a wonderful friend, the best friend she's ever had. She had never thought of him any other way. Of course not.
"Oh who am I kidding?!" Daphne yelled loudly at herself. She knew what she was feeling, for there was no doubt in her mind what her dream meant. In fact, for the first time in her dreams, her visions, the message had been completely and utterly clear. She had never actually seen the faces before.
But what if her dream was wrong? What if, because of the current circumstances with Donny, Daphne had completely fabricated Niles' attraction to her because of…wishful thinking? How embarrassing that conversation would be. So embarrassing that she decided never to mention it to anyone, not even herself. Ever again.
Well, Daphne tried to relieve the thoughts of Niles from her mind, but they were there. Like oxygen. Just the right amount of oxygen is perfect, but too much will smother you, and too little will choke you to death. Daphne couldn't breathe, she felt completely smothered by the imminent despair of the vision of Niles' lips warming hers, sending little pinpricks all over her body.
She wanted to tell him, but she did love Donny and she had made a promise to him, and the only time that Daphne had ever broken a promise was when she had wrecked her car and had to go to the hospital when she was 23. Furthermore, she even called the person from the hospital and apologized profusely for not making her appointment. But how she could she get married to Donny when she was, well thought she was, in love with Niles? And what does she do when she sees him everyday for the rest of her years helping out Martin? Daphne was too confused to think, so she sat up and stared at her unicorn collection for a while. Maybe her favored unicorn could give her an answer. But alas, Ophelia had no answers.
Daphne's mind was racing, she couldn't complete a clear thought and her unicorn had not comforted her as such. She heard the front door unlatch.
"Oh God, I can't face anyone like this," Daphne thought to herself. She heard Frasier's voice echo through the corridor.
"One point. That was one point, and I don't think that it was a fair call anyway…" Frasier trailed. And then Daphne heard another voice. It was Niles.
"Frasier, you are being absolutely ridiculous. I won, and you know it. You just need to get over this sibling rivalry thing you have going here…I mean really," Niles retorted.
"Niles, will you get off your high horse? You are exactly the same way," he hesitated, "well I am going to pour myself a sherry. Would you like one as well?"
"Yes, thank you," Niles replied.
How interesting that a glass of sherry could bring these two brothers back together after a quarrel, Daphne was musing to herself. With her brothers, they just drank everything in sight and therefore their quarreling was just often the result of a drunken misadventure. The thought of Niles in the next room sent chills down Daphne's spine. She could not speak to him just then, for she was afraid that she would do something drastic, like telling him what she was thinking about at that moment. And how would that go?
"Niles, I think I am in love with you. I want to just forget about Donny and have you wrap me in your arms and kiss me all over." Yeah, that would work. Daphne groaned and turned on her stereo. And what would be on the radio? Every single station there was a love or heartbreak song. First station was playing "Crush," by Dave Matthews, the second was playing "With or Without You," by U2, and the third and last station that she attempted to listen to was playing "The Nearness of You," the song that she and Niles had danced to "that night." She had begun referring to that evening as "that night" because it had created such an impression on her memory that she could not shake every single detail.
Outside of Daphne's bedroom, Frasier and Niles were talking softly.
"Frasier, I just can't stop thinking about the other night with…Daphne. I can't shake the feeling that she might have felt something too," Niles said quietly.
"Niles, you are just trying to create these illusions in your head. She is a friend. She was a friend in need, and you helped her. These feelings that you think she may have felt may just be feelings of love that she has such a good friend. I am sure that she loves you, but not in the way that you hope." Frasier answered.
"But how do you know that? You weren't there. You didn't see the way she looked at me. And you didn't see the way she held my hand. It was just that…" Niles continued.
"Niles!" Frasier said loudly and then softened, "Daphne is marrying Donny and you just need to get on with your life. I hate to put this so bluntly, but Daphne is not in love with you. She is in love with Donny. And that's it." Frasier frantically tried to make Niles understand, but to no avail.
"But Donny has no respect for Daphne. He does not deserve her."
"He may not deserve her as much as you, in my opinion, but it is Daphne's choice. And she has chosen who she is in love with." Frasier said.
"But how could she, she doesn't even know how I feel?"
"And whose fault is that?" Frasier replied. Niles looked at his feet, hurt. He just wanted to crawl under the piano. "Niles, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."
"No, you're right. I obviously don't respect Daphne because if I did I would have had the courage to tell her how I feel," Niles said with a break in his voice. He quickly got up. "Well, I have to go."
"Niles, wait…" But Niles was already out the door. Frasier sighed as Daphne walked out of her bedroom. "Oh hi Daphne, I didn't know you were here," Frasier said and then took one look at her face and asked, "Is there something wrong?"
"Dr. Crane…um…there's something I need to talk to you about."
PART 6: THE TEMPEST
Niles sat in the Montana with a glass of Chablis reading over some of his notes from the office. A single tear dropped onto his notebook forcing little driblets of black to coarse down the lined whiteness of the page. He sniffed and attempted to cover his tears, but came to the realization that no one was around and that there was need to hide how he felt. So he grabbed a tissue and wiped his eyes and grabbed another notebook that was sitting next to his fainting couch. He began to write frantically in his book, rather his journal that he kept about his day-to-day life. He wished that he could tell Daphne everything that he had ever written in there, in fact he had sometimes purposefully left it in open places around the house almost hoping that Daphne would read it so he would not have to tell her what he had longed to tell her for seven years.
Frasier's voice began ringing in his ears, "…she has chosen who she is in love with…" Niles couldn't help but despair over their conversation because every last bit of it was true. Daphne was in love with Donny and when she had come over it was just to be comforted by a friend, and if he had respected her and truly loved her, he would have had the courage to tell her how he felt instead of bottling it all up inside pretending that it wasn't there. Niles picked up his ballpoint and looked straight ahead into the blankness of his dimly lit apartment. He got up from the couch and sat by the window thinking about when he and Daphne had watched the sunrise together. He realized that once she was married that there would never be another moment like that ever again. Watching the sunrise is something she will be doing with Donny from now on. She will dance with Donny, she will hold Donny's hand, and will bandage Donny's finger when he bleeds. The thought of this made Niles want to jump off his balcony, but he knew that thoughts of suicide were foolish at a time like this. It was the clearest night that Seattle had had in 5 months and Niles still couldn't see past the overcast. There was the constellation Orion, in plain sight, but for Niles there was not a star in the sky. He lingered by the window for a moment and then ambled to his room to prepare for bed.
Daphne lay awake in her bed staring at the ceiling. She had told Frasier everything that had been troubling her lately, and she was afraid that he would slip it to someone. She was afraid that that someone would be Niles. She was grateful he did not act the typical psychiatrist and rearrange and twist everything that she was saying because she did not need that. She just needed someone to tell, and Frasier just happened to be there at the right place and the right time. She just didn't know how much longer she could continue this masquerade, especially with Donny. The wedding was in one week and she couldn't think about anything but Niles Crane when she should have been thinking only of how happy she will be when she became Donny Douglas. Daphne Douglas just didn't sound right anyway. Not that Daphne Crane sounded much better, but at least DC didn't stand for D-Day.
"I'm an awful person!" Daphne thought to herself. She decided that she refused to continue on, and decided to tell Donny. Even if Niles had no feelings for her, she couldn't go into a marriage feeling this strongly about someone else. It was inevitable. She just had to find a time to talk to him.
Donny Douglas was sitting in Café Nervosa waiting on a double Mocha when Daphne walked through the door.
"Hello, sweetie," Donny said and pecked Daphne on the lips when she walked to his table. "And to what do I owe this special meeting? Having trouble with the priest? The caterer? You know I could take care of some of that for you. You don't have to do it all…" he smiled.
"Hello Donny, no, um…I need to talk to you about something else," Daphne nervously said, "but first I need to get a drink. I'll be right back." Daphne practically ran up to the counter. A double Mocha and a Cappucino later Daphne had sat across from Donny.
"So, what is this all about?" Donny inquired.
"Um…well you see…I…I…" Daphne stuttered.
"What are you going to break up with me," Donny laughed.
"Well, it's just I…um…" Daphne tried to continue.
"Oh my god, that's it," Donny's smile had turned into a frown. "What's wrong? Is this about what we talked about a little while ago about how I wasn't giving you enough decisions. I can change. I thought I was doing better because you know I love you."
"No, that's not it," Daphne said, "It's just…I think that I am…" she paused for what seemed like an eternity, "…in love with someone else." Daphne finished.
"Who is he, I'll kill him." Donny said.
"Donny…he doesn't even know and I don't even know if he feels the same way about me, but I can't go into a marriage when I feel like this about somebody else. I'm sorry."
"Just tell me who he is, I promise I won't kill him. I just don't understand why you wouldn't have told me sooner. I mean we are, well are supposed to get married in 3 days. Did you just meet this motherfucker or something?" Donny said frantically.
"No. I've known him for a long time. And I didn't realize that I loved him until recently."
"Well, maybe it's just cold feet, you know I was reading in this bridal magazine, not that I read those normally, but I was trying to be more sensitive, well not too sensitive, anyway, this magazine was saying that sometimes bride's get cold feet before the wedding and can…" Donny rambled.
"No, Donny, it's not that. I am in love with this guy. And if I tell you who it is, will you promise not to say anything to him or to anyone he knows. And please don't kill him," Daphne said nervously.
"Scout's honor." Donny said.
"It's Dr. Crane," and before Daphne could say anything else, Donny burst in with an accusation,
"How could Frasier do this to me? Why Frasier…wouldn't you know if you loved him a long…" Donny kept talking.
"Donny! It's not that Dr. Crane, it's his brother, Niles."
"Niles? Gimpy Niles? I could more understand Frasier than Niles, but Niles?" Donny's voice softened, "Does he know how you feel?"
"No, and now is not the time to tell him. I mean, for awhile there I thought that he might have feelings for me, but now I'm not so sure. Donny, all I can say now is that I am sorry, but I couldn't marry you when I feel this way."
"I love you, Daphne, and because I love you I am going to let you go. I won't give you my blessing, but I don't want to see you unhappy, so I will let you go. But if you ever need a friend or anything you can always call me. But if this Niles thing doesn't work out and I'm still single, you know where to find me. Not that this hot bod could stay single for long," Donny laughed in an artificial but priggish manner.
"I love you. Thank you, and I really mean that." Daphne smiled. She kissed Donny on the cheek and left.
After Daphne was clearly out of earshot, Donny murmured, "Goodbye, Daphne."
PART 7: hold my hand and we're halfway there
Niles awoke to the sound of construction outside of his window. Apparently, they were fixing the water pipes on the next block so Niles was unable to sleep.
"It's 7:30 in the morning you jack-asses!" Niles yelled aloud. He tossed and turned shoving the pillow in front of his face. He continue to toss and turn, practically kicking the covers completely off while screaming into his pillow. Finally he got up and went to the bathroom to wash his face.
Having gone to bed at sunrise, it had been another sleepless night for Niles, and he knew that it had to stop. He also knew that the only way to stop it was either to a)tell Daphne how he felt, b)move to another country and terminate all contact with anyone he knew, or c)jump off the balcony and hope to die on impact. Well, Niles wasn't too thrilled about giving up his practice, so he didn't want to leave the country, and anyway, Frasier would most likely track him down. Option c wouldn't necessarily work because he would either be the one person that did not die from a 20 story drop, or he was terrified that the only people that would come to his funeral were Frasier and Martin, and that was just too depressing to think about. So he decided that unless he told Daphne how he felt, and within the next few days, then he would never sleep again. He decided that that night was the night. He just had to think of a way to do it without scaring her to death. Maybe a hot bath would help him figure out his plan, so he turned on the water, poured a bit of vanilla and lavendar into his Jacuzzi tub, and got in. He sighed a breath of relief.
Daphne opened the door of the Crane residence as Martin greeted her with a gruff "hello."
"Hello, Mr. Crane," Daphne said, her voice slightly quivering. Martin turned off the tv and looked up at Daphne concerned.
"Daph, what's wrong?" Even Eddie looked concerned and he barked at her.
"Oh, it's just I…I…" Daphne began to sob, "I broke it off with Donny." Her sobbing continued, "and I think I'm in love with someone else…"
"I know…Frasier told me," Martin continued. Daphne's tears turned into anger,
"How could he tell you!!!??? I told him not to tell anyone about that!!!!" Daphne yelled.
"Well, Frasier was concerned and you know that he can never keep his big wazoo shut. But don't worry, Niles has no idea about any of this. I'm sure everything will work out fine." Martin said in a reassuring voice.
"I wish I could be as optimistic as you." Daphne laughed. "I just don't know what to do, I mean, should I tell Niles how I feel, or should I just try and forget about the whole thing?"
"I can't tell you what to do, and I can't speak for Niles, but I do know that he cares a lot for you, so do what your heart tells you to do. That's what I did with Hester, and for the most part, it all worked out in the end. You may lose someone, but they are always in your heart," Martin said.
"Thank you, Mr. Crane," Daphne said as she wiped the tears from her face, "that's just what I needed to hear." Martin handed Daphne a Kleenex and she went off solemnly to her room.
Niles was driving his Mercedes through downtown wondering if his decision was the right one. He had decided that it was in Daphne's best interest if he just write his feelings in a note and leave it at that. He understood that she was getting married in a couple of days and that he could not stop the wedding, so his best option, so he could at least sleep at night, was to tell her and get it over with. But he also didn't feel like standing around while she read waiting for the dreaded response that he knew would proceed.
"Dr. Crane, I'm sorry, I just think of you as a friend," Daphne would say. Niles could not bear to hear those words so he thought that a letter would mend the situation. He had come to a quick convenience store across the street from Frasier's apartment, so he parked his car to go inside and get a cup of coffee. God knows he would need one and he needed a couple minutes to build up his confidence. It had also begun to rain a little bit, as the smell of must was unbearable for Niles. As he headed into Frasier's building he noticed a couple of people yelling at each other on the street.
"And Frasier thought this was a decent neighborhood," Niles muttered to himself.
"Niles got in the elevator and made his way up to Frasier's floor. Mrs. Hinkley was in the elevator with Mr. Hinkley and they were having a rather heated discussion about some occurrence that had happened at their country club the night before. A discussion that Niles pretended not to hear, especially not to giggle at. At least that had cheered his disposition a bit.
He knocked on the door of his dear brother's abode and Daphne answered the door.
"Dr. Crane!" Daphne said in a startled manner, "Well, come in."
"Daphne, I just have to talk to you about something, but only for a minute because I have to get going." Niles noticed that the balcony door was open, and he could smell the faint smell of a cigarette. Daphne noticed that Niles was looking towards the balcony,
"Would you like to talk out on the balcony, I just…whenever I get stressed, I…sometimes smoke. And I love to watch the rain." Daphne said nervously.
"Oh yes, perfectly understandable," Niles stammered. The tension that lied between them could not have been cut with a chainsaw. "Um, you see, I have this, um, note that I want you to read, well not quite yet, but after I leave. You see, it's just something that I wanted you to know, but I just couldn't bear to…I can't stay around for you to read it." They were standing out on the balcony, the rain slightly whispering against their cheeks. "Here." Niles said and handed Daphne the note.
"Thank you," she said tenderly, "I…uh…wish you could stay longer."
"Yes, well I…"Niles could not help himself, he could not stand it any longer, he felt as if his chest were about to burst and the heat in his face was unbearable.
He kissed her. Her mouth tasted so sweet on his lips and it was if all the weight was being pushed out of his chest, that he could not breathe for fear that he would fall, but then he stopped. He was breathing heavily.
"Daphne, I am so sorry. I…I…I have to go." Niles made a run for the door, hot tears tracing down his cheeks.
The door slammed behind him and Daphne was left in shock. She opened the letter that had smeared a bit from the rain and it said,
Dear Daphne,
This may come as an utter and complete shock to you and the timing horrific, but I have been in love with you for seven years now. I have wanted to tell you, but have just not found the words to do so. I am sorry if this upsets you especially since you will be married very soon, but I just wanted you to know that I am totally and completely in love with you and I just could not hold this inside any longer. I want to apologize again for telling you like this, but I could not bear to hear you say that I was just a friend, or that you loved me like a brother. That night that we danced together at my apartment and watched the sunrise together was the best night of my life, and I just wanted you to know that. If you no longer wish to be my friend, I will be able to handle that, I just couldn't live with this secret any longer. I wish you well.
Love,
1.2.1.1 Niles
No sooner had Daphne read that last line, she had run out the door.
The rain was coming in torrents as Niles slowly walked back across the street towards his car. He could neither see nor hear what was going on around him, or the people that were still fighting in the street. He made his way, almost to his car, full out weeping now, when he heard a shout from across the street.
"Niles!" Daphne yelled. He whipped around to see her running towards him.
"I love you too!!!" And for one second everything bad that had ever happened in his life was washed away with the rain and into the gutter. Daphne was smiling as she ran towards him, and he was so happy and excited running towards her that he did not see that little black object being pulled out of the man's pants across the street, or hear the shots that had been fired. As he reached Daphne, she fell into his arms slumping against his chest and he felt a sharp pain in his left shoulder. The blood began to seep into Niles' shirt and through his sleeve as he fell to the ground.
"Daphne! Daphne!!!! Daphne!!!!!!!!!!" Niles screamed, but there was no response. For a moment he did not understand what had happened, why she had passed out, he seemed to have no memory of what had just happened until he saw a small bullet hole with blood trickling out of her head.
"Daphne, say something! Daphne, please…don't leave me…I have to get you to the hospital, something's wrong!!!! Something's wrong!!!! Somebody help!!!!!!! I love you I love you please don't leave me. Please don't…" and Niles passed out.
Niles opened his eyes and saw a figure looming over his bed; he soon realized that it was a woman, for the voice was spoken with a soft feminine tone.
"Niles," Daphne said touching his face lightly, "You know that I love you, I think I have loved you since we first met. I just didn't know it until now."
Coming to the realization of who it was, Niles responded, "Daphne, oh you look so radiant, you are practically glowing, my love. Where are we?"
"That doesn't matter, what matters is that I love you and will be with you forever, but for now, I have to go away for awhile," Daphne said sadly.
"Go away? What for?" Niles said, confused.
"Someday, you'll understand, but for now just know how much I love you." Daphne said.
"Can't I go with you?" Niles wanted to cry.
"No, love. But we will see each other again soon enough. Life lasts such a short time, and I just want you to enjoy yours while you have it," and at this Daphne kissed Niles on the lips and began to walk out of the room. "Goodbye Niles."
"Daphne wait!" Niles screamed, but she was gone. Niles did not understand and seemed to have this odd ringing in his ears. He stared at the ceiling until he fell asleep.
Niles awoke to a beeping noise which he thought was his alarm, but soon realized that he was in the hospital. He tried to sit up, but there was such a sharp pain in his shoulder that he couldn't.
"Niles!" Frasier said. "Oh thank god, you're awake." He hugged him. "I thought I would never see you again!" There were tears in Frasier's eyes.
"We thought you were done for," Martin said, "I love you so much son, don't ever scare us like that again." Martin was crying as well.
"What happened?" Niles said confused.
"You got shot, that's what happened," Martin said, "the doctor's said that you were very lucky. Two centimeters lower and you'd be playing a harp right now."
Niles suddenly remembered everything, Daphne running towards him. Daphne telling him she loved him. Daphne slumping into his chest, her blood staining his shirt.
"Dad…Frasier…Where's Daphne?"
part 8: the conclusion
Martin and Frasier eyed each other impatiently waiting for the other to speak first as Niles lay in his hospital bed awaiting a response.
"Well," Niles repeated, "Where is Daphne? I mean, how is she because she gave me quite a scare there." Niles semi-laughed expecting this to be some sort of joke, that Daphne had not been shot and that she had just fallen down.
Frasier opened his mouth to speak, but nothing could come out but a slight choked whimper, so he turned around so Niles could not see his pain. Martin, being the constant, his boys' rock throughout their lives finally spoke up with a sympathetic tone in his voice.
"She's gone son. I'm sorry," and with that, he touched Niles' hand as Frasier began to cry.
Niles laughed a laugh of disbelief, "What do you mean she's gone? Gone where? Did she go back to the apartment? I'm sure she was tired. Although you would think that if a doctor had any sense they would keep her overnight for observation. Damn HMO's." Niles said matter-of-factly.
Frasier turned to face Niles, "No, Niles. She's gone. She passed away before she even got to the hospital. She was also shot. I'm sorry Niles."
"No, that can't be right. The last thing I remember was that she had told me that she loved me, you see I had taken this letter to her that told her how I felt, and then when I thought that all hope was lost, I saw that shining face from across the street tell me that she loved me too. She ran to me, and she just fell down. The blood on my shirt was my own. I got shot twice in the arm," Niles said ridiculously.
"Son, you were only shot once. The other bullet hit Daphne in the head. She's dead. You have to believe us. It's unbelievable what happened, but it's the truth."
"No, Dad, that makes no sense, she was just here. She told me that she loved me and that she would always be with me, but she had to go away for a little while. Then, I think she maybe said something about me understanding it later, or something, but anyway, SHE WAS HERE." Niles said in hysterics.
Frasier and Martin looked at each other and Frasier finally said, "Niles, if you want to talk about it, we can talk. I know this is terribly devastating for you. It's devastating for all of us. I really don't think that this is something we can ever really get over….Niles…" he was obviously not paying attention because all of a sudden Frasier could hear him mumbling numbers to himself. "Niles, are you even listening to me? Do you hear what I am saying. Daphne is dead, she is gone. You will never see her again."
"Frasier!" Martin yelled at his son, "how can you be so insensitive to your brother?"
"What?" Niles said, "Oh, sorry, I was just counting the dots on the ceiling. I just counted 200, but then I lost track."
"Dad," Frasier turned to Martin, "he's in denial. I don't think he will ever come to terms with this and it doesn't take a trained psychiatrist to know this."
"Frasier, I'm not in denial about anything because Daphne was just here, she was holding my hand and talking to me. Do you think that I would hallucinate that?" Niles said calmly.
"Under normal circumstances, no, but Niles…" Frasier tried to continue, but Martin interrupted.
"Frasier, I think we'd better leave him alone for a little while. Son, if you need us we will be right outside, ok?" And Martin shooed Frasier and himself out the door.
Niles was alone and for no apparent reason he had begun to cry.
"How silly of me to cry," he thought, "I have only lost count a couple times." Pretty soon Niles had completely lost count because he could no longer see the dots at all, they were just little blurs. Niles began to hum to himself, a little song that he seemed to remember from some tale upon a midnight clear. The haunting lilts of the song reminded him of almonds and cherry bark as he sang aloud,
"It's just the nearness of you."
The end
By: Lindsey
PART 1
There was a knock at the door. His eyelids opaque to the darkness that enveloped them cracked open to welcome the night into his azure eyes. The only light apparent was the light emanating from the bathroom two doors away. He always kept this light on, It having been his savior so many fruitless nights in which he had stumbled out of bed half-asleep when nature had called to him.
"Always at the oddest times of night," he had often muttered aloud to himself.
Niles Crane talked to himself an awful lot these days. He had other vices however. He drank too much sherry, read a lot of Jung, and attended the opera an indecent amount of times during the week. Perhaps confiding in his brother more times than necessary, was also not to his benefit. But these vices were irrelevant to his current situation for they had been there for him for more years then he could count. He had only recently began to converse with him, himself, and he. Frasier, the true Freudian that he was, would just hypothesize that it had to do with his early childhood and his having an elder more outgoing brother. Niles hated Frasier sometimes.
Love, however, was the main feeling that he felt for his brother, though. How could you not love your own blood, for they may have hurt you in the past, may have put a damper on some of your conquests, well mainly One for Niles, but in the end there have been more support than unkindness. A shoulder to cry on. A date for the opera. A fellow sherry drinker. In fact, if you listed Niles Crane's vices in a row, they would all link to Frasier.
The silhouette of a once sane man began to slowly plod down the staircase in his silk robe and bed slippers. The robe had come from Victoria's Secret, but Niles had never shared that secret with anyone for it was embarrassing and why should anyone have to know? It was the most comfortable robe that he had ever slipped into. His shadow reached the bottom of the stairs before he did for the harsh fluorescent of the bathroom barely lit up the midnight blue in his garment.
"Coming," he said aloud after another knock had been prominently placed onto his door. "Mrs. Benny, I'm sorry if my ocean sounds have been disturbing you, but honestly they have not reached the sound decibel in which you need to wake me at 3:45 in the morning." He had proven his point, but felt the need to continue, "but if you wish for me to explain this again, I will," Niles stopped as he opened the door.
There she stood, her lips pressed firmly together and her jaw clenched tight. Her cheeks were rosy with the sudden warmth of entering from the bitter cold that was the outside temperature.
"Dr. Crane," she whispered, "I'm sorry to wake you at this hour, but I need to talk to someone."
"Daphne!" Niles exclaimed, perhaps a little too loudly because he awkwardly changed to his normal baritone, "…um, please, come in."
Niles had regressed from a distinguished early forties gentleman to a gangly, awkward preteen boy. He attempted to recover his inelegance, "Would you care for some tea?"
"Um, no thank you…well I suppose I could have a bit, just nothing with caffeine please, I'm already having a hard of enough time falling asleep," Daphne chortled. Was it Daphne that was regressing this time? "As I said before, I am sorry to come over here at such a late hour."
"Oh, it's alright, I was up already," Niles replied thinking to himself, "Liar, liar, liar!"
"Liar," Daphne giggled, "but I thank you for being so sweet to say that." She slightly tapped his hand in a playful slap.
Niles retreated to the kitchen and began to boil the water. He called, "Oh, and in response to your quandary, none of my tea has caffeine; it is all herbal." He re-entered into the living room. Daphne had taken a seat onto Niles' Victorian fainting couch, so Niles took the advantage and sat next to her. She smelled of must and almond for the mix of sleet and rain, or "reet" as Niles had called it as a child, had formed into quite of a torrential downpour. At this Niles, gazed out the window, "It's really coming down out there, do you think that it might snow soon?"
"That would be beautiful," Daphne observed in a far away manner. They both sat quiet for a moment and listened to the faint pecks of little ice pellets falling against the window pane. It was almost as if some neighborhood kids were engaging in a snowfight directly outside the window and had missed each other one too many times. The pelting soon was drowned out by the slow increase in volume of a shrilling approaching from the kitchen.
"Tea's on," Niles said and got up from the couch.
"What was that?" Daphne said in a kind of haze. "The tea…oh…yeah," she muttered. "I must really be a mess if I can't even remember the sound of a teapot boiling," she laughed a little and then was quiet.
Niles knew that something was wrong, but he figured that he wouldn't mention anything until Daphne said something first; he was enjoying this moment of them sitting there listening to the sounds of the outside world. Alone. But he knew that it wouldn't last, for he was sure that Daphne was just seeking a little comfort from a friend and nothing else. How many times, Niles had dreamed, had fantasized about the two of them cuddling together in front of a fire on the couch just looking into each other's eyes realizing that they both felt the same for each other. A wisp of hair would fall over her eyes that had a reflection of the fire and he would brush it away with a touch. How he wished that she had the same dreams about him. But in vain, all she felt was comfort in him, trust, a true friend. He supposed that he could live with that if it always stayed like that, and no man ever came into the picture, but that reality was an unreality. Still, she was there with him, alone, in his apartment at 4:10 in the morning and they had been sitting in front of the fire listening to the sounds of the outside world. The surreal aspect of this hit Niles very quickly and he felt light-headed.
"Are you ok in there, Dr. Crane?" Daphne called from the other room.
"Dr. Crane," he muttered to himself. His fantasy broken. "Yeah, I'm fine, I was just letting the tea steep a little longer." Niles had just recomposed and was unaware that Daphne had appeared just behind him.
"Are you sure you don't need anything?" Daphne asked. Niles dropped a teacup onto the floor. "Oh, I am so sorry, Dr. Crane. I didn't mean to startle you."
Niles began to pick up the glass shard off the floor, "Oh it's alright, I just haven't completely woken up yet I suppose." At that, Niles grabbed his finger in pain, and the blood began to trickle very lightly from the slit on his pinky.
"Oh! Here, let me help you with that," Daphne insisted as she grabbed a towel and compressed it onto his finger for a few seconds. As she held his hand, she noticed that he was quivering slightly. "You're trembling? Is something wrong?"
"No," he gazed into her eyes, "I'm fine, it's just a little cut." Daphne pulled the towel off for a second at which Niles took one look at a miniscule drop of blood and passed out.
Niles awoke to Daphne's face looming over his, "Is this a dream?" he thought to himself.
"Oh thank god, I was really worried for a second there."
"Oh, oh…it's just, it's the sight of blood. I can't stand the sight of blood," Niles said quickly. Daphne reached into a drawer and took out a bandage and placed it over his finger.
"There," Daphne smiled, "now you won't have to see it." All of a sudden, Daphne kissed his finger. The warmth from the touch of her lips had sent a shiver up Niles' spine. "Does that make it better?" Daphne said in a babying voice.
"Oh yes," Niles exclaimed still trying to recover from the excitement.
Daphne picked up the tea tray and they moved their little soiree back to the couch.
"Shall I put on some music?" Daphne inquired, her jaw completely relaxed.
"Yes, that would be nice," Niles responded, very much in heaven. Not that he actually believed that anything would happen between the two of them, for she had in fact come to him in crisis, and he was not going to take advantage of her. However, just being with Daphne delighted him. And who knew what the night would bring!
1 Part 2- tale upon a midnight clear
Daphne plodded over to the stereo and put in a cd, "I hope this is alright…" Daphne said.
"Oh, I'm sure it will be lovely," Niles said with a bit of terror in his voice. He had not listened to Daphne's music that often, and really didn't know what to expect.
"As long as it isn't polka," Niles thought to himself.
"It's polka music," Daphne triumphed, "You do like polka don't you?" Niles' jaw slowly dropped and he tried to cover his horror.
"Um, polka, well yes, I…" he began to stammer as Daphne burst into laughter.
"I was just kidding, Dr. Crane. I know how much you hate polka, I never cared for it myself. It's an old jazz compilation of mine, mainly composed of Frank Sinatra. It makes me miss my brother Billy, the ballroom dancer. He and I used to dance to 'Luck Be A Lady' and 'Some Enchanted Evening'. You know, Billy once met Ol' Blue Eyes…we went to this show in…"
Niles studied Daphne's face as she excitedly told her story about when she was a little girl and he wished that he could be in her world for just a moment. To have those memories at such a close reach. To have those memories at all. He wished that he had known Daphne as a girl; would they have been friends? Maybe he would have had more guts to ask her out had he been younger and without a Maris to have broken him of all his securities that he had previously had. Niles pondered this and realized that he must have been daydreaming for when he refocused, Daphne was staring at him.
"Dr. Crane, would you?"
"Would I what?" Niles said sheepishly.
"Care to dance," was Daphne's reply.
"I would love to," Niles said in his charming boyish tone. Daphne extended her hand and Niles took it graciously. "Oh what memories this brings back," Niles smiled.
"The snow ball was so glamorous. I have to admit that that was the most fun I have had in quite a long time, especially the part about making all those snobs rethink their opinions." Daphne put her head on Niles' shoulder and began to sing the words to the song aloud, "It's not the pale moon, that excites me. That thrills and delights me, oh no. It's just the nearness of you." At that, Daphne had looked directly into Niles' eyes.
His heart beat a mile a minute. He felt as if he would faint, was it just the moment or was that a look of amore in Daphne's eyes. He could feel his body moving unconsciously closer to her. His mind was racing, "This is wrong this is wrong no no no what are you doing niles wake up niles this is not the time you can't take advantage of this creature so lovely this is wrong no no no." He could no longer control his body as he wrapped his arms completely around hers, and there faces were so close that he was breathing her breath. He so wanted to feel the touch of her warm lips pressed against his, but his instincts finally kicked in and he put his head against her neck and smelled her hair instead. His breathing had quickened, and he was sure that Daphne must have noticed, but she continued to sing quietly.
"When you're in my arms, and I feel you so close to me. All my wildest dreams come true," Daphne mused. At this Niles lifted his head from her neck and began to sing to her as well,
"I need no soft lights to enchant me. If you'll only grant me the right to hold you ever so tight, and to feel in the night the nearness of you," they both stopped.
"Dr. Crane, you have the most beautiful singing voice. I wish you would sing more often," Daphne said.
"Well, I don't as often feel the need to." Niles replied as they continued to dance until the last remnants of the piano had faded.
When the song stopped, both Niles and Daphne stood there in silence and then much to Niles' dismay, Daphne broke the moment by saying,
"Um…so, Dr. Crane, the reason I came over here was…"
"Oh yes, what seems to be troubling you," Niles said in a business- like voice. They both sat down on the couch.
"You see, well, Donny has been wanting to push up the wedding date, and…" Daphne continued.
"Donny," Niles sighed to himself. Donny had been Niles' lawyer during his divorce from Maris, and in his excitement from the settlement, Niles had neglected to notice that Daphne had taken a shine to Donny. To his dismay, Donny had proposed to her and because of some advice Niles had given to Daphne, she accepted. Niles despised Donny more than anyone else he knew except for one person, himself. He had let Daphne get away. He could of told her, but he didn't and he knew that he would regret it for the rest of his life.
"…and I just don't think I'm quite prepared for it," Daphne finished.
Niles had been only partially listening to Daphne's tale of woe and solemnly replied, "I understand."
"But what should I do," Daphne inquired helplessly, "I do love Donny and I don't know why I wouldn't want to get married to him as soon as possible. Usually when you love someone so much, you want to be with them as soon as possible, and I don't know why I am having doubts. Oh, I just don't know what to do, Dr. Crane."
"Doubts?" Niles thought to himself and then decided to say it aloud.
"Well, you know I have these visions, and yes I know you think that they are ridiculous, but I just can't shake the feeling that I am making a mistake," Daphne said.
"On the contrary, I don't think that they are ridiculous at all," Niles said, though he was lying through his teeth and he corrected himself. "It's not necessarily the visions that I think is the problem here, it seems to more be the feeling. The kind of gut feeling you get when you know that something is wrong, or something is missing," he paused, "I get that feeling all the time."
"You do?" Daphne asked delicately.
"All the time. I've been missing something for seven years now, but I've just learned how to cope with it. Sometimes, you just learn to cope with things." Niles shuddered at what he had just said. He basically had told Daphne that she should definitely stay with Donny because he had learned to cope with his feelings and so should she.
"Why am I always helping their relationship? I should just shut up!" Niles thought to himself. He dreaded that she would tell him that he was correct.
"I guess you're right," Daphne resigned.
Niles thought about it for a second and then stated, "No. No, I'm not. You shouldn't just learn to deal with things. You should do something about them. It's too late for me, but you can still have what you want. Listen to me Daphne, listen to your heart. If Donny is the man for you, then so be it, but if you are having too many doubts then think about this: what will you do once you are married if you are having this many doubts now?"
"You were the one who advised me to accept, Dr. Crane," Daphne retorted.
"I know, and I didn't realize that I was doing it at the time, and I'm sorry. But you are sure about Donny, so there shouldn't be a problem." Niles was beginning to get sick of hearing Donny's name.
"It's just, he's has so many ideas of exactly what HE wants for the wedding, and how it will fit into HIS schedule, I don't think that he has given a thought to what I have said," Daphne said angrily.
"Well, if I was your fiancé, I would certainly listen to what you had to say. The whole idea of marriage is uniting, compromising, doing things together. You become one. If it was us, we would be NilesDaphne, having one heart, but still having two different souls, you wouldn't go from being Daphne to Niles, now would you?" Niles stopped, "I'm sorry, it's 5:30 in the morning and I am not making any sense, am I?"
"Actually, that was beautiful, you have made a lot of sense. Thank you Dr. Crane." Daphne peered out the window, "oh, how beautiful. The sun is just beginning to rise, Dr. Crane, come here."
Niles walked over to the window and stood by her side, "It is lovely, not as lovely as you of course," Niles regretted saying that aloud. He must have really been delirious.
"Thank you, Niles."
"Was she blushing? Did she just call me Niles?" Niles thought to himself. Daphne reached down and took Niles' hand into hers, and he thought that he would faint.
"Well, thank you so much for your help, and I am so sorry that I came over so late at night. You are such a wonderful friend." At this Daphne kissed Niles quickly on the lips and started for the door, "I'll see you tomorrow. Or today rather!" she giggled.
Niles speedily walked to the door to open it for her and as she was leaving he hugged her and said, "Goodnight Daphne, the blue in Apollo's eyes."
"Goodnight," she said, and it was over. The door had closed and Niles was once again alone.
Niles stood by the door, his heart beat slowing. His eyes fluttered for a second and then closed as he breathed in the leftover wafts of Daphne's shampoo. He walked over to the table and picked the remnants of what had been left of their tea party. There was a smudge of Daphne's lipstick on one of his teacups and he wished that he could never wash it again, but to his own sensibility, he took it to the kitchen and set it in the sink to be washed. The taste of Baby Kiss was still on his lips where Daphne had planted it.
Peering at the floor, he realized that there was still a little shard of glass the teacup had shattered, and he had a sudden vision of Daphne's face over his as he had awoken. If only he could awake to that face every morning. Niles looked at the clock, it was 6:15 am and his first appointment was at 9. He was about to go to bed when he reached down to pick up the glass and threw it in the trash. There was a spot of blood dried on the floor and Niles wiped it up with a dishrag. He didn't faint, he didn't even feel light-headed because it is only the sight of fresh, flowing blood that his body rejected.
Niles turned off the lights in the kitchen and headed up to his bedroom. Upon reaching his bed he disrobed and sat on his Sealy Posturepedic, contemplating the night, however he could barely move for lack of sleep. He went to reach for the lamp switch and hit his pinky against the night shade.
"Ouch!" he said and lifted his bandaid up. It was still bleeding a little, so Niles finally passed out for the night.
1.1 PART 3: THE MORNING AFTER
Niles awoke tangled in the covers looking as if his neck was broken. He could barely move his neck from the stiffness. He attempted to massage it himself, but to no avail. He stumbled down the stairs to make his coffee and to take some aspirin. Aspirin and coffee, breakfast of champions. He felt as if he had the worst hangover that had ever existed, but he realized that he had to get through the rest of the day, so he took his shower and dressed in his work suit and headed out the door.
Meanwhile, Daphne awoke with a start. She realized that she needed to have a discussion with Donny today about what she and Dr. Crane had talked about. She couldn't marry this man unless he understood how she felt and was going to respect her as she respected him. However, that level of respect had been dissipating quickly. She dressed in her robe and walked into the living room where Frasier and Martin were already sitting at the table drinking coffee and eating breakfast.
"Well, look what the cat dragged in," Martin laughed, "You must have been up late with Donny last night…" Martin smirked.
"Ah, the lovebirds, so how is Donny?" Frasier inquired.
"Before you answer that Daphne, I would just like to add to feel free not to talk about it," Martin interrupted.
Daphne didn't want to meet either of their expressions so she quietly answered, "um…yes…Donny." She hurried off into the kitchen.
Frasier leaned in closer to his father and whispered, "Daphne is acting rather strangely this morning. Do you think that she and Donny got into a fight?"
"Now, Fras, it's Daphne's relationship, so it's Daphne's problem. We don't need to get into this with her. So let her do the talking and let's not bring this up again."
"Alright Dad, I see your point. It's just that it's obvious something's wrong…" Frasier said.
"Well then let Daphne tell us if she wants to," Martin cautioned. "End of story."
"What story?" Daphne said as she walked back into the living room. She was holding a cup of coffee in one hand and a Danish in the other.
"Oh, well Dad was just telling me about something that happened when he was on the force. Weren't you Dad?" Frasier inquired.
"Oh yeah, strange. It was…strange."
"Well, I want to hear about it," Daphne retorted.
"Um…well, it's really not that exciting, it was just a…um…a…uh" Martin started.
"Robbery," Frasier chimed.
"Yeah, a robbery, you see it wasn't very exciting. Well, Eddie looks like he needs to do his business so I'll be back. Frasier remember what the moral of that story was." Martin said definitively.
"Yes Dad, thanks." Martin called Eddie and they walked out the door. Daphne sat down at the table.
"Well, that was odd," she said, "what's the moral of the story?"
"Don't drink and steal. I must remember that," Frasier tapped his fingers impatiently, "Well I have to get down to the station, Roz will yell at me if I'm late again."
"But you don't have to be there for another 2 hours," Daphne said, puzzled.
"Well, I want to be there extra early, then…uh…Roz can't say I was late," Frasier looked very flustered as he basically made a run for the door. "See you later, Daph!"
And Daphne was alone. She wasn't completely alone, she had an old cup of lukewarm coffee and a prune Danish to keep her company, but even they could not prepare her for what she had to do today. She had to face Donny and give him an ultimatum. She hated ultimatums for than anyone she knew, but if he didn't start treating her with more respect, there was no way that she was going to marry this shell of a man. "Why can't he see it the way Dr. Crane does," Daphne asked in the general direction of her coffee mug. She wasn't talking to the mug, no. She never talks to inanimate objects much less herself. Oh who was she kidding, she was talking to a slab of glazed ceramic. "Well, they all think I'm a bit nutty, so who cares if you do too" Daphne triumphantly said to the French Roast. "I have to get out of here," Daphne thought so she headed for the door when she realized that she was still in her robe. "I must really be losing my mind," Daphne muttered as she headed for her bedroom to change.
Niles had not been very productive in his sessions thus far. During Miss Dryden's session he had almost had a nervous breakdown, while Mrs. Burton had practically put him to sleep. Needless to say, Niles needed someone to talk to.
He strode into Café Nervosa hoping to god that Frasier would be there. He saw him sitting at a table with Roz in the corner and he nodded recognition. He walked up to the counter and ordered his usual as Roz was just getting up to leave. Niles sat down across from Frasier, of course not without first wiping the chair perfectly clean.
"Hello Niles," Frasier warmly said. Niles quietly responded back with a quick hello. "Sit down…is something wrong?"
Niles pondered this comment for a moment and thought about the last 12 hours, "Well, it's about Daphne." And before he could finish what he was trying to say, Frasier cut in.
"Niles, I love you. You are my brother and I understand how much you love this woman, but you need to forget about her. You know that she's about to be married and you cannot continue to pursue this fantasy. You know when I was with Lilith, there was someone that…"
"Frasier, before you continue, I was not discussing with you my feelings about Daphne, I was merely attempting to say that she was having a problem." Niles interrupted.
"I thought something might be wrong, but Dad told me not to ask her anything about it. You see, she got up extremely late this morning and looked quite disheveled; in fact, she wouldn't look either me or Dad in the eye when she talked to us. I wonder if she and Donny had a fight late last night because I awoke around 2:45 in the morning to get some water and happened to catch a glimpse of her going out the door. I figured she was just going over to Donny's to have a discussion or something else that I really don't want to think about."
"Did you ask her if she was at Donny's last night?" Niles asked impatiently.
"Well, not in exact words, but it was implied, and she agreed that yes she had been at Donny's."
Niles looked astonished. "Well for your information, Frasier, she was not with Donny last night," he smirked.
Frasier looked very confused, "Well, then who was she with?" Niles raised an eyebrow sending chills down Frasier's spine, "Oh my god, what did you do to her?"
"How dare you suggest that I would take advantage of Daphne," Niles angrily spat, "I love her enough to have the sense not to screw up her life that much. But, oh mama, I was having a hard time restraining myself. It was beautiful, we danced, we had tea, and we watched the sunrise together. I will always remember the time we shared." Niles was no longer in Café Nervosa, he had wandered into some ethereal Daphneland again. Daphneland is like Disneyland, but with fewer rides.
"Niles. Niles!!!! Hey, snap out of it. Gain control of yourself," Frasier waved in Niles' face. "So just tell me one thing…why was Daphne even at your place last night?
"Donny. She was having a problem with Donny and came to ask my advice about it," Niles watched Frasier's face turn to horror, but he quickly jumped in, "and there's no need to worry because I assure you the advice I gave her would be what any friend would advise another friend to do. I didn't tell her to dump him or anything."
"Well, what's her problem with Donny?" Frasier inquired.
"Well, I can't go into specifics because that would be betraying her trust, and I just won't do that, but in a nutshell, she doesn't feel like Donny respects her." Niles said.
Frasier was confused. "How does she think that? The man is obviously head over heels for her."
"I can't discuss it," Niles looked at his watch, "Oh god, I have a session in 15 minutes, I have to go."
"Niles, wait!" Frasier said desperately. But he was gone. Frasier stared at his coffee cup for a minute and left as well, very confused about the whole situation. However, in Frasier's competitive state of mind, what baffled him the most was why she didn't come to him first. "The nerve of that woman," he scoffed as he left Café Nervosa for the day.
1.2 Part 4: a midnight summer's daydream
Daphne was tired. Tired of life, tired of arguing, tired of Donny. Needless to say, things did not go too well with her lawyer fiancé. The only consolation was that he had finally apologized to her for his actions. His actions! It wasn't just his actions that bothered her, it was what he thought of her. Daphne had come to the conclusion that Donny did not respect her in the least, and she was about ready to break it off with him. She thought that she could make him understand, and he thought he could understand.
She didn't know what to do, so she decided to go home, take a warm bath, give herself a mud mask, and drink some hot tea. Well maybe not tea, maybe some hard liquor would do it.
Daphne was not usually a sherry drinker, but Frasier and Martin, well even Eddie was out, so she helped herself to the contents of Frasier's sherry decanter and after she had had quite a few swigs, well more then a few, Daphne decided to skip the mud mask, hell, skip the warm bath and pass out on her bed.
Blue mist covered the atmosphere of the bar.
"Where am I?" Daphne wondered. It seemed that she was the only one in the joint for all the seats were empty and there was a very empty looking band playing a sort of blues/jazz set that would only be played in Seattle dive clubs downtown. Extraordinarily, the bartender was still serving drinks to invisible people it seemed, so Daphne approached the bar.
"I'd like a vodka martini, extra dry," Daphne ordered.
"Coming right up," the bartender replied. The ambience of the place almost seemed like a moment that she had seen in the film, 'The Shining,' but she decided not to overanalyze the situation. Upon receiving her martini she walked back into the center of the room and noticed that a figure had appeared at the door. She could tell that it was a man, but couldn't make out the face until he was a foot away from her.
"Donny!" Daphne practically shouted, "What are you doing here?" For one, she didn't know how she got to this bar or why no one was there, but what made her even more curious was why Donny was there. He looked at her lovingly and his lips began to move as if he was saying something to her, but she couldn't hear anything he said. It was as if he had become mute and did not even know it himself.
"Donny, I can't hear you. What are you saying?" Daphne asked frantically. He touched her face and then kissed her cheek and in the same amount of time that he had been there, he was gone. Back into the mist, enveloped by the shadows, completely gone from sight. Daphne gulped down her martini and chewed on the olive. The music had begun to play louder and Daphne's entire body had begun to sway back and forth, a motion that she was unable to control. As her body swayed more and more the lights changed more into a kind of greenish tint and she ran up to the bar to get another drink.
"Another martini, vodka, extra dry," Daphne chattered. As she lifted the martini glass to her lips, her hands began to tremble, and all of a sudden there was a hand on her shoulder.
"Why are you trembling, love?"
"Billy! What the bloody hell are you doing here? Did you meet Donny, he was just…here." Daphne said, very confused. Why was her brother at this bar? Shouldn't he be at home in Manchester?
"Something told me that I should come over here and ask you to dance. Remember how we used to dance when we were kids?" At this, Billy took the martini glass out of her hand and set it on a table that had just appeared there.
"But…" Daphne began, but Billy interrupted her.
"No talk. Let's just dance, like it used to be." So they danced for what seemed like hours until Daphne realized that she was dancing by herself, the mist even thicker than before. She could not even see the bartender anymore and the room had become red, a fiery red, and she was beginning to sweat through her…oh my god, she realized that she was completely and utterly naked! She tried to cover herself, but there was nothing to cover herself with, but she finally gave up because she figured that if she couldn't see anyone, then no one could see her. The music had become so loud at this point that she had begun to see the vibration of the percussion in the mist. The volume grew until all of a sudden, it just stopped. The mist cleared, she could see again, and she all of a sudden remembered that she was naked, that the mist no longer covered her. However, when she looked down at herself, she realized that she was wearing her favorite red dress. She peered around the room for any sign of someone, but it seemed empty, until she looked at the bar. There was someone there. A figure, a man, dressed nicely in a hand-stitched jacket and matching pants. There was something about him though because he looked very sad, very sullen as if he had just lost someone that he deeply cared about. She approached the man and sat down beside him when she realized that it was Niles.
"Dr. Crane! What are you doing here?" Daphne inquired.
"I'm sorry, have we met?" Niles asked. Needless to say, Daphne was shocked. This man that had been her dear friend for over 7 years did not even know who she was. Did he have amnesia, or was he just playing some kind of sick joke?
"Dr. Crane, it's me…D…D…" She couldn't say her name. She couldn't tell him who she was. She didn't understand. Perhaps she didn't even know who she was, but he knew her better than anyone, more than herself, why couldn't he figure out who she was?
"I'm sorry that I don't remember you, where do we know each other from? Have you visited my offices before?" Niles inquired.
"No." Daphne said hesitantly. "I can't believe you don't remember me."
"I'm terribly sorry, perhaps my mind is too clouded from the amount of liquor that I have consumed." He looked down at his glass of sherry and she noticed a small tear stream down his cheek. She decided to forego all the confusion that was besetting her and find out what had happened to him.
"Excuse me for asking, but what's wrong?" Daphne asked. Niles didn't speak for a moment, but then looked up.
"Well, I probably shouldn't be talking about this, but there is this woman. This extraordinarily beautiful goddess that I am in love with." Niles mused. Daphne noticed another tear begin to form in his eye. "And she doesn't love me." Daphne's mind began to race. Who could Niles possibly be in love with that would tear him apart this way?
"How do you know that she doesn't love you?" Daphne asked.
"Well," Niles' voice choked, "you see, she is getting married very soon and I am sure that she doesn't love me."
"You mean, she hasn't TOLD you that she doesn't love you? Because if she hasn't, then why…" Daphne said.
"No, she hasn't told me that she doesn't love me, well the thing is is that, well it's that, well…I've never told her that I love her." Niles said quietly.
"Why haven't you?" Daphne asked, obviously still oblivious of whom Niles was speaking of.
"I don't know. It could be because I'm afraid of rejection…I love her so much, and I suppose that I would rather love her from afar then know that she doesn't love me." He began to cry.
"Well, if you want my opinion, I think that you should tell her anyway. She could be making a mistake. Maybe there are doubts in her mind about the man that she is marrying. Maybe she doesn't really love him. Maybe she loves you." Daphne did not understand what had just come out of her mouth, but she let it go.
"I just can't deal with that chance of rejection. I just can't do it."
"Well, what's her name?" Daphne asked.
Niles paused for a moment, his eyes lighting up, "Her name is…Daphne."
Daphne awoke with a jerk. "What was that?!"
1.2.1 PART 5: there's something about unicorns
Needless to say, Daphne was confused. Although the level of difficulty in the interpretation of her dream may have been like tying one's shoe to someone else, Daphne was not convinced. She had no inkling whatsoever of Niles' feelings for her, except that he loved her as a friend, a very good friend, a wonderful friend, the best friend she's ever had. She had never thought of him any other way. Of course not.
"Oh who am I kidding?!" Daphne yelled loudly at herself. She knew what she was feeling, for there was no doubt in her mind what her dream meant. In fact, for the first time in her dreams, her visions, the message had been completely and utterly clear. She had never actually seen the faces before.
But what if her dream was wrong? What if, because of the current circumstances with Donny, Daphne had completely fabricated Niles' attraction to her because of…wishful thinking? How embarrassing that conversation would be. So embarrassing that she decided never to mention it to anyone, not even herself. Ever again.
Well, Daphne tried to relieve the thoughts of Niles from her mind, but they were there. Like oxygen. Just the right amount of oxygen is perfect, but too much will smother you, and too little will choke you to death. Daphne couldn't breathe, she felt completely smothered by the imminent despair of the vision of Niles' lips warming hers, sending little pinpricks all over her body.
She wanted to tell him, but she did love Donny and she had made a promise to him, and the only time that Daphne had ever broken a promise was when she had wrecked her car and had to go to the hospital when she was 23. Furthermore, she even called the person from the hospital and apologized profusely for not making her appointment. But how she could she get married to Donny when she was, well thought she was, in love with Niles? And what does she do when she sees him everyday for the rest of her years helping out Martin? Daphne was too confused to think, so she sat up and stared at her unicorn collection for a while. Maybe her favored unicorn could give her an answer. But alas, Ophelia had no answers.
Daphne's mind was racing, she couldn't complete a clear thought and her unicorn had not comforted her as such. She heard the front door unlatch.
"Oh God, I can't face anyone like this," Daphne thought to herself. She heard Frasier's voice echo through the corridor.
"One point. That was one point, and I don't think that it was a fair call anyway…" Frasier trailed. And then Daphne heard another voice. It was Niles.
"Frasier, you are being absolutely ridiculous. I won, and you know it. You just need to get over this sibling rivalry thing you have going here…I mean really," Niles retorted.
"Niles, will you get off your high horse? You are exactly the same way," he hesitated, "well I am going to pour myself a sherry. Would you like one as well?"
"Yes, thank you," Niles replied.
How interesting that a glass of sherry could bring these two brothers back together after a quarrel, Daphne was musing to herself. With her brothers, they just drank everything in sight and therefore their quarreling was just often the result of a drunken misadventure. The thought of Niles in the next room sent chills down Daphne's spine. She could not speak to him just then, for she was afraid that she would do something drastic, like telling him what she was thinking about at that moment. And how would that go?
"Niles, I think I am in love with you. I want to just forget about Donny and have you wrap me in your arms and kiss me all over." Yeah, that would work. Daphne groaned and turned on her stereo. And what would be on the radio? Every single station there was a love or heartbreak song. First station was playing "Crush," by Dave Matthews, the second was playing "With or Without You," by U2, and the third and last station that she attempted to listen to was playing "The Nearness of You," the song that she and Niles had danced to "that night." She had begun referring to that evening as "that night" because it had created such an impression on her memory that she could not shake every single detail.
Outside of Daphne's bedroom, Frasier and Niles were talking softly.
"Frasier, I just can't stop thinking about the other night with…Daphne. I can't shake the feeling that she might have felt something too," Niles said quietly.
"Niles, you are just trying to create these illusions in your head. She is a friend. She was a friend in need, and you helped her. These feelings that you think she may have felt may just be feelings of love that she has such a good friend. I am sure that she loves you, but not in the way that you hope." Frasier answered.
"But how do you know that? You weren't there. You didn't see the way she looked at me. And you didn't see the way she held my hand. It was just that…" Niles continued.
"Niles!" Frasier said loudly and then softened, "Daphne is marrying Donny and you just need to get on with your life. I hate to put this so bluntly, but Daphne is not in love with you. She is in love with Donny. And that's it." Frasier frantically tried to make Niles understand, but to no avail.
"But Donny has no respect for Daphne. He does not deserve her."
"He may not deserve her as much as you, in my opinion, but it is Daphne's choice. And she has chosen who she is in love with." Frasier said.
"But how could she, she doesn't even know how I feel?"
"And whose fault is that?" Frasier replied. Niles looked at his feet, hurt. He just wanted to crawl under the piano. "Niles, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that."
"No, you're right. I obviously don't respect Daphne because if I did I would have had the courage to tell her how I feel," Niles said with a break in his voice. He quickly got up. "Well, I have to go."
"Niles, wait…" But Niles was already out the door. Frasier sighed as Daphne walked out of her bedroom. "Oh hi Daphne, I didn't know you were here," Frasier said and then took one look at her face and asked, "Is there something wrong?"
"Dr. Crane…um…there's something I need to talk to you about."
PART 6: THE TEMPEST
Niles sat in the Montana with a glass of Chablis reading over some of his notes from the office. A single tear dropped onto his notebook forcing little driblets of black to coarse down the lined whiteness of the page. He sniffed and attempted to cover his tears, but came to the realization that no one was around and that there was need to hide how he felt. So he grabbed a tissue and wiped his eyes and grabbed another notebook that was sitting next to his fainting couch. He began to write frantically in his book, rather his journal that he kept about his day-to-day life. He wished that he could tell Daphne everything that he had ever written in there, in fact he had sometimes purposefully left it in open places around the house almost hoping that Daphne would read it so he would not have to tell her what he had longed to tell her for seven years.
Frasier's voice began ringing in his ears, "…she has chosen who she is in love with…" Niles couldn't help but despair over their conversation because every last bit of it was true. Daphne was in love with Donny and when she had come over it was just to be comforted by a friend, and if he had respected her and truly loved her, he would have had the courage to tell her how he felt instead of bottling it all up inside pretending that it wasn't there. Niles picked up his ballpoint and looked straight ahead into the blankness of his dimly lit apartment. He got up from the couch and sat by the window thinking about when he and Daphne had watched the sunrise together. He realized that once she was married that there would never be another moment like that ever again. Watching the sunrise is something she will be doing with Donny from now on. She will dance with Donny, she will hold Donny's hand, and will bandage Donny's finger when he bleeds. The thought of this made Niles want to jump off his balcony, but he knew that thoughts of suicide were foolish at a time like this. It was the clearest night that Seattle had had in 5 months and Niles still couldn't see past the overcast. There was the constellation Orion, in plain sight, but for Niles there was not a star in the sky. He lingered by the window for a moment and then ambled to his room to prepare for bed.
Daphne lay awake in her bed staring at the ceiling. She had told Frasier everything that had been troubling her lately, and she was afraid that he would slip it to someone. She was afraid that that someone would be Niles. She was grateful he did not act the typical psychiatrist and rearrange and twist everything that she was saying because she did not need that. She just needed someone to tell, and Frasier just happened to be there at the right place and the right time. She just didn't know how much longer she could continue this masquerade, especially with Donny. The wedding was in one week and she couldn't think about anything but Niles Crane when she should have been thinking only of how happy she will be when she became Donny Douglas. Daphne Douglas just didn't sound right anyway. Not that Daphne Crane sounded much better, but at least DC didn't stand for D-Day.
"I'm an awful person!" Daphne thought to herself. She decided that she refused to continue on, and decided to tell Donny. Even if Niles had no feelings for her, she couldn't go into a marriage feeling this strongly about someone else. It was inevitable. She just had to find a time to talk to him.
Donny Douglas was sitting in Café Nervosa waiting on a double Mocha when Daphne walked through the door.
"Hello, sweetie," Donny said and pecked Daphne on the lips when she walked to his table. "And to what do I owe this special meeting? Having trouble with the priest? The caterer? You know I could take care of some of that for you. You don't have to do it all…" he smiled.
"Hello Donny, no, um…I need to talk to you about something else," Daphne nervously said, "but first I need to get a drink. I'll be right back." Daphne practically ran up to the counter. A double Mocha and a Cappucino later Daphne had sat across from Donny.
"So, what is this all about?" Donny inquired.
"Um…well you see…I…I…" Daphne stuttered.
"What are you going to break up with me," Donny laughed.
"Well, it's just I…um…" Daphne tried to continue.
"Oh my god, that's it," Donny's smile had turned into a frown. "What's wrong? Is this about what we talked about a little while ago about how I wasn't giving you enough decisions. I can change. I thought I was doing better because you know I love you."
"No, that's not it," Daphne said, "It's just…I think that I am…" she paused for what seemed like an eternity, "…in love with someone else." Daphne finished.
"Who is he, I'll kill him." Donny said.
"Donny…he doesn't even know and I don't even know if he feels the same way about me, but I can't go into a marriage when I feel like this about somebody else. I'm sorry."
"Just tell me who he is, I promise I won't kill him. I just don't understand why you wouldn't have told me sooner. I mean we are, well are supposed to get married in 3 days. Did you just meet this motherfucker or something?" Donny said frantically.
"No. I've known him for a long time. And I didn't realize that I loved him until recently."
"Well, maybe it's just cold feet, you know I was reading in this bridal magazine, not that I read those normally, but I was trying to be more sensitive, well not too sensitive, anyway, this magazine was saying that sometimes bride's get cold feet before the wedding and can…" Donny rambled.
"No, Donny, it's not that. I am in love with this guy. And if I tell you who it is, will you promise not to say anything to him or to anyone he knows. And please don't kill him," Daphne said nervously.
"Scout's honor." Donny said.
"It's Dr. Crane," and before Daphne could say anything else, Donny burst in with an accusation,
"How could Frasier do this to me? Why Frasier…wouldn't you know if you loved him a long…" Donny kept talking.
"Donny! It's not that Dr. Crane, it's his brother, Niles."
"Niles? Gimpy Niles? I could more understand Frasier than Niles, but Niles?" Donny's voice softened, "Does he know how you feel?"
"No, and now is not the time to tell him. I mean, for awhile there I thought that he might have feelings for me, but now I'm not so sure. Donny, all I can say now is that I am sorry, but I couldn't marry you when I feel this way."
"I love you, Daphne, and because I love you I am going to let you go. I won't give you my blessing, but I don't want to see you unhappy, so I will let you go. But if you ever need a friend or anything you can always call me. But if this Niles thing doesn't work out and I'm still single, you know where to find me. Not that this hot bod could stay single for long," Donny laughed in an artificial but priggish manner.
"I love you. Thank you, and I really mean that." Daphne smiled. She kissed Donny on the cheek and left.
After Daphne was clearly out of earshot, Donny murmured, "Goodbye, Daphne."
PART 7: hold my hand and we're halfway there
Niles awoke to the sound of construction outside of his window. Apparently, they were fixing the water pipes on the next block so Niles was unable to sleep.
"It's 7:30 in the morning you jack-asses!" Niles yelled aloud. He tossed and turned shoving the pillow in front of his face. He continue to toss and turn, practically kicking the covers completely off while screaming into his pillow. Finally he got up and went to the bathroom to wash his face.
Having gone to bed at sunrise, it had been another sleepless night for Niles, and he knew that it had to stop. He also knew that the only way to stop it was either to a)tell Daphne how he felt, b)move to another country and terminate all contact with anyone he knew, or c)jump off the balcony and hope to die on impact. Well, Niles wasn't too thrilled about giving up his practice, so he didn't want to leave the country, and anyway, Frasier would most likely track him down. Option c wouldn't necessarily work because he would either be the one person that did not die from a 20 story drop, or he was terrified that the only people that would come to his funeral were Frasier and Martin, and that was just too depressing to think about. So he decided that unless he told Daphne how he felt, and within the next few days, then he would never sleep again. He decided that that night was the night. He just had to think of a way to do it without scaring her to death. Maybe a hot bath would help him figure out his plan, so he turned on the water, poured a bit of vanilla and lavendar into his Jacuzzi tub, and got in. He sighed a breath of relief.
Daphne opened the door of the Crane residence as Martin greeted her with a gruff "hello."
"Hello, Mr. Crane," Daphne said, her voice slightly quivering. Martin turned off the tv and looked up at Daphne concerned.
"Daph, what's wrong?" Even Eddie looked concerned and he barked at her.
"Oh, it's just I…I…" Daphne began to sob, "I broke it off with Donny." Her sobbing continued, "and I think I'm in love with someone else…"
"I know…Frasier told me," Martin continued. Daphne's tears turned into anger,
"How could he tell you!!!??? I told him not to tell anyone about that!!!!" Daphne yelled.
"Well, Frasier was concerned and you know that he can never keep his big wazoo shut. But don't worry, Niles has no idea about any of this. I'm sure everything will work out fine." Martin said in a reassuring voice.
"I wish I could be as optimistic as you." Daphne laughed. "I just don't know what to do, I mean, should I tell Niles how I feel, or should I just try and forget about the whole thing?"
"I can't tell you what to do, and I can't speak for Niles, but I do know that he cares a lot for you, so do what your heart tells you to do. That's what I did with Hester, and for the most part, it all worked out in the end. You may lose someone, but they are always in your heart," Martin said.
"Thank you, Mr. Crane," Daphne said as she wiped the tears from her face, "that's just what I needed to hear." Martin handed Daphne a Kleenex and she went off solemnly to her room.
Niles was driving his Mercedes through downtown wondering if his decision was the right one. He had decided that it was in Daphne's best interest if he just write his feelings in a note and leave it at that. He understood that she was getting married in a couple of days and that he could not stop the wedding, so his best option, so he could at least sleep at night, was to tell her and get it over with. But he also didn't feel like standing around while she read waiting for the dreaded response that he knew would proceed.
"Dr. Crane, I'm sorry, I just think of you as a friend," Daphne would say. Niles could not bear to hear those words so he thought that a letter would mend the situation. He had come to a quick convenience store across the street from Frasier's apartment, so he parked his car to go inside and get a cup of coffee. God knows he would need one and he needed a couple minutes to build up his confidence. It had also begun to rain a little bit, as the smell of must was unbearable for Niles. As he headed into Frasier's building he noticed a couple of people yelling at each other on the street.
"And Frasier thought this was a decent neighborhood," Niles muttered to himself.
"Niles got in the elevator and made his way up to Frasier's floor. Mrs. Hinkley was in the elevator with Mr. Hinkley and they were having a rather heated discussion about some occurrence that had happened at their country club the night before. A discussion that Niles pretended not to hear, especially not to giggle at. At least that had cheered his disposition a bit.
He knocked on the door of his dear brother's abode and Daphne answered the door.
"Dr. Crane!" Daphne said in a startled manner, "Well, come in."
"Daphne, I just have to talk to you about something, but only for a minute because I have to get going." Niles noticed that the balcony door was open, and he could smell the faint smell of a cigarette. Daphne noticed that Niles was looking towards the balcony,
"Would you like to talk out on the balcony, I just…whenever I get stressed, I…sometimes smoke. And I love to watch the rain." Daphne said nervously.
"Oh yes, perfectly understandable," Niles stammered. The tension that lied between them could not have been cut with a chainsaw. "Um, you see, I have this, um, note that I want you to read, well not quite yet, but after I leave. You see, it's just something that I wanted you to know, but I just couldn't bear to…I can't stay around for you to read it." They were standing out on the balcony, the rain slightly whispering against their cheeks. "Here." Niles said and handed Daphne the note.
"Thank you," she said tenderly, "I…uh…wish you could stay longer."
"Yes, well I…"Niles could not help himself, he could not stand it any longer, he felt as if his chest were about to burst and the heat in his face was unbearable.
He kissed her. Her mouth tasted so sweet on his lips and it was if all the weight was being pushed out of his chest, that he could not breathe for fear that he would fall, but then he stopped. He was breathing heavily.
"Daphne, I am so sorry. I…I…I have to go." Niles made a run for the door, hot tears tracing down his cheeks.
The door slammed behind him and Daphne was left in shock. She opened the letter that had smeared a bit from the rain and it said,
Dear Daphne,
This may come as an utter and complete shock to you and the timing horrific, but I have been in love with you for seven years now. I have wanted to tell you, but have just not found the words to do so. I am sorry if this upsets you especially since you will be married very soon, but I just wanted you to know that I am totally and completely in love with you and I just could not hold this inside any longer. I want to apologize again for telling you like this, but I could not bear to hear you say that I was just a friend, or that you loved me like a brother. That night that we danced together at my apartment and watched the sunrise together was the best night of my life, and I just wanted you to know that. If you no longer wish to be my friend, I will be able to handle that, I just couldn't live with this secret any longer. I wish you well.
Love,
1.2.1.1 Niles
No sooner had Daphne read that last line, she had run out the door.
The rain was coming in torrents as Niles slowly walked back across the street towards his car. He could neither see nor hear what was going on around him, or the people that were still fighting in the street. He made his way, almost to his car, full out weeping now, when he heard a shout from across the street.
"Niles!" Daphne yelled. He whipped around to see her running towards him.
"I love you too!!!" And for one second everything bad that had ever happened in his life was washed away with the rain and into the gutter. Daphne was smiling as she ran towards him, and he was so happy and excited running towards her that he did not see that little black object being pulled out of the man's pants across the street, or hear the shots that had been fired. As he reached Daphne, she fell into his arms slumping against his chest and he felt a sharp pain in his left shoulder. The blood began to seep into Niles' shirt and through his sleeve as he fell to the ground.
"Daphne! Daphne!!!! Daphne!!!!!!!!!!" Niles screamed, but there was no response. For a moment he did not understand what had happened, why she had passed out, he seemed to have no memory of what had just happened until he saw a small bullet hole with blood trickling out of her head.
"Daphne, say something! Daphne, please…don't leave me…I have to get you to the hospital, something's wrong!!!! Something's wrong!!!! Somebody help!!!!!!! I love you I love you please don't leave me. Please don't…" and Niles passed out.
Niles opened his eyes and saw a figure looming over his bed; he soon realized that it was a woman, for the voice was spoken with a soft feminine tone.
"Niles," Daphne said touching his face lightly, "You know that I love you, I think I have loved you since we first met. I just didn't know it until now."
Coming to the realization of who it was, Niles responded, "Daphne, oh you look so radiant, you are practically glowing, my love. Where are we?"
"That doesn't matter, what matters is that I love you and will be with you forever, but for now, I have to go away for awhile," Daphne said sadly.
"Go away? What for?" Niles said, confused.
"Someday, you'll understand, but for now just know how much I love you." Daphne said.
"Can't I go with you?" Niles wanted to cry.
"No, love. But we will see each other again soon enough. Life lasts such a short time, and I just want you to enjoy yours while you have it," and at this Daphne kissed Niles on the lips and began to walk out of the room. "Goodbye Niles."
"Daphne wait!" Niles screamed, but she was gone. Niles did not understand and seemed to have this odd ringing in his ears. He stared at the ceiling until he fell asleep.
Niles awoke to a beeping noise which he thought was his alarm, but soon realized that he was in the hospital. He tried to sit up, but there was such a sharp pain in his shoulder that he couldn't.
"Niles!" Frasier said. "Oh thank god, you're awake." He hugged him. "I thought I would never see you again!" There were tears in Frasier's eyes.
"We thought you were done for," Martin said, "I love you so much son, don't ever scare us like that again." Martin was crying as well.
"What happened?" Niles said confused.
"You got shot, that's what happened," Martin said, "the doctor's said that you were very lucky. Two centimeters lower and you'd be playing a harp right now."
Niles suddenly remembered everything, Daphne running towards him. Daphne telling him she loved him. Daphne slumping into his chest, her blood staining his shirt.
"Dad…Frasier…Where's Daphne?"
part 8: the conclusion
Martin and Frasier eyed each other impatiently waiting for the other to speak first as Niles lay in his hospital bed awaiting a response.
"Well," Niles repeated, "Where is Daphne? I mean, how is she because she gave me quite a scare there." Niles semi-laughed expecting this to be some sort of joke, that Daphne had not been shot and that she had just fallen down.
Frasier opened his mouth to speak, but nothing could come out but a slight choked whimper, so he turned around so Niles could not see his pain. Martin, being the constant, his boys' rock throughout their lives finally spoke up with a sympathetic tone in his voice.
"She's gone son. I'm sorry," and with that, he touched Niles' hand as Frasier began to cry.
Niles laughed a laugh of disbelief, "What do you mean she's gone? Gone where? Did she go back to the apartment? I'm sure she was tired. Although you would think that if a doctor had any sense they would keep her overnight for observation. Damn HMO's." Niles said matter-of-factly.
Frasier turned to face Niles, "No, Niles. She's gone. She passed away before she even got to the hospital. She was also shot. I'm sorry Niles."
"No, that can't be right. The last thing I remember was that she had told me that she loved me, you see I had taken this letter to her that told her how I felt, and then when I thought that all hope was lost, I saw that shining face from across the street tell me that she loved me too. She ran to me, and she just fell down. The blood on my shirt was my own. I got shot twice in the arm," Niles said ridiculously.
"Son, you were only shot once. The other bullet hit Daphne in the head. She's dead. You have to believe us. It's unbelievable what happened, but it's the truth."
"No, Dad, that makes no sense, she was just here. She told me that she loved me and that she would always be with me, but she had to go away for a little while. Then, I think she maybe said something about me understanding it later, or something, but anyway, SHE WAS HERE." Niles said in hysterics.
Frasier and Martin looked at each other and Frasier finally said, "Niles, if you want to talk about it, we can talk. I know this is terribly devastating for you. It's devastating for all of us. I really don't think that this is something we can ever really get over….Niles…" he was obviously not paying attention because all of a sudden Frasier could hear him mumbling numbers to himself. "Niles, are you even listening to me? Do you hear what I am saying. Daphne is dead, she is gone. You will never see her again."
"Frasier!" Martin yelled at his son, "how can you be so insensitive to your brother?"
"What?" Niles said, "Oh, sorry, I was just counting the dots on the ceiling. I just counted 200, but then I lost track."
"Dad," Frasier turned to Martin, "he's in denial. I don't think he will ever come to terms with this and it doesn't take a trained psychiatrist to know this."
"Frasier, I'm not in denial about anything because Daphne was just here, she was holding my hand and talking to me. Do you think that I would hallucinate that?" Niles said calmly.
"Under normal circumstances, no, but Niles…" Frasier tried to continue, but Martin interrupted.
"Frasier, I think we'd better leave him alone for a little while. Son, if you need us we will be right outside, ok?" And Martin shooed Frasier and himself out the door.
Niles was alone and for no apparent reason he had begun to cry.
"How silly of me to cry," he thought, "I have only lost count a couple times." Pretty soon Niles had completely lost count because he could no longer see the dots at all, they were just little blurs. Niles began to hum to himself, a little song that he seemed to remember from some tale upon a midnight clear. The haunting lilts of the song reminded him of almonds and cherry bark as he sang aloud,
"It's just the nearness of you."
The end
