Disclaimer - Don't own RENT or the song Arms of the Angel. Both belong to their respected owners. 'Nuff said.
Italics are song lyrics and thoughts.
A/N: no idea how this story came to me, it just did.
Summary: AU: As Angel lies dying, Collins' can't deal with it. First Collins/Angel fic. Set to the song Arms of the Angel by Sarah McLaughlin. One-shot.
Genre: Drama
Rating: K
He looks so peaceful Collins thought as he looked down at the drag queen. All his drag had been removed and he had been placed in a plain light blue hospital gown.
"Hey hun." Angel greeted him, his voice hoarse.
"Oh my God. You're awake. I thought-" Angel's smiling eyes looked up at Collins.
"Sweetie, I'm not going anywhere yet." Angel told him, his voice soothing.
"I just want you to know that I love you." Collins whispered in the other man's ear. Angel smiled and leaned back against the pillows.
Spend all your time waiting for that second chance
For the break that will make it OK
There's always some reason to feel not good enough
And it's hard at the end of the day
I need some distraction or a beautiful release
Memories seep from my veins
Let me be empty and weightless and maybe
I'll find some peace tonight
Collins took a cab back to the loft, tears in his eyes. The doctor had diagnosed Angel with full-blown AIDS and gave him until Halloween - which was in four days - to live.
Mark, Joanne and Maureen greeted Collins as he entered the loft. He knew where Roger and Mimi were - Mimi was working and Roger had shut himself in his room and refused to come out.
In the arms of the angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
You're in the arms of the angel; may you find some comfort here
The next day, Collins and Roger went on a walk to get their minds off of Angel. Mark, Joanne, Mimi and Maureen were at the hospital, seeing their dearest friend.
"Remember the first time I brought Angel home?" Collins asked after an eternity of silence. Roger just nodded his head and continued walking.
"Rog, what's wrong? I hate it when you cut me off from everything." Collins told his friend, reaching out to touch him. Roger shrugged off Collins' touch and headed down an alleyway.
How can my day get any worse? Collins thought. Looking up at the sky, he saw storm clouds gather and saw lightening split the sky. Thunder rumbled and the rain poured. Worrying about Roger, Collins went to find him and some shelter.
So tired of the straight line, and everywhere you turn
There's vultures and thieves at your pack
The storm keeps on twisting, you keep building the lies
That you make up for all that you lack
It don't make no difference, escaping one last time
It's easier to believe
In this sweet madness, oh this glorious sadness
That brings me to my knees
Soaked to the bone, the two men headed back to the loft to find it empty. A note in Mimi's handwriting said that the four of them - including Benny - were at the hospital. Roger's eyes welled up when he read Mimi's last words - There's not much time.
The two of them quickly showered, changed and hailed a cab to the hospital. They eventually got one and silently prayed that Angel would be alive when they got there.
In the arms of the angel far away from here
From this dark, cold hotel room, and the endlessness that you fear
You are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie
In the arms of the angel; may you find some comfort here
When they arrived, Angel requested that he spend his last few moments alone with Collins and Mimi, sending the rest of the gang to the waiting room.
They waited, and waited, and waited. Maureen picked up a magazine and skimmed through it; Mark stared into space; Roger brought his composition notebook and began to write a song; Joanne played Solitaire while Benny prayed silently.
It was Mimi who came over to the group and sat on Roger's lap, tears in her eyes.
"She's gone." Mimi sobbed. Roger dropped his notebook and wrapped his arms around Mimi, crying together. Maureen burst out crying and both Mark and Joanne rushed over to soothe her, crying with her. Benny, who didn't know Angel very well, still prayed silently.
"Even though I didn't know her - I mean him - all that well, I'll pay for the funeral." Benny told Collins as he pulled him aside from the rest of the group.
"Thanks Benny. I guess you're not a selfish bastard after all." Collins half-teased, pulling Benny into a bear hug. Even though it wasn't the best time, Roger, Maureen, Mark, Joanne and Mimi burst out laughing. Both Benny and Collins chuckled at the comment.
Collins had some paperwork to fill out, so the five of them went out to get something to eat at 4:00 in the morning. Benny, however, stayed with Collins to make sure he was okay.
You're in the arms of the angel; may you find some comfort here.
