I've Got You
Sreed
Disclaimer: I know they are in good hands, but he really needs to let them be together, otherwise we may have to take matters into our own hands.
Author Notes: Okay, so I wrote two versions of There For You and the whole opening up to each other thing, but I couldn't decide which one to post, so I gave this one another name and posted it too. I have an idea about which one I like best, but I'd love to hear from the rest of you. Which one do you like better?
Elliot had just decided to go to bed. It had been a long day. He had been sent across town to assist another unit with multiple victims of a sex ring. It would be all over the newspaper tomorrow. He hated to leave Liv with their latest case, a missing little girl, but Cragen ordered him. He knew if he wasn't there, Liv would do too much. She never knew when to call it quits. He sighed. He worried about her so much and things between them had been strained ever since he told her about his divorce being final six months ago. It felt funny to be single again. His was so used to laughter filling his house and now his apartment only felt that way on weekends these days. He missed his kids, especially little Eli.
As he stood to turn out the lights and drag himself to bed, his buzzer sounded. Who would show up this late at night? It could only be one of the kids or LIv and at this time of night it had to be bad. Instead of buzzing them up, he sprinted down the stairs barefoot and could see a wet Liv looking down at her feet and shaking out on the front steps. He opened the door.
"Liv? Liv what's wrong?"
Her eyes turned up to meet his and he could see she had been crying. More importantly she did not look good. She was soaking wet and her lips looked like they were turning blue. He had never seen such devastation in her eyes before.
"Come inside. Are you crazy? Where have you been?"
"Looking for Marisa. We got a tip that she had been seen in the warehouse district. We've been looking for hours. We found her El. He killed her after he beat and raped her for hours. I… I just…walked away from the scene. We didn't get to her in time. We didn't find her in time. I couldn't take it. I've just been walking around for hours trying to make sense of it, you know? I…"
She suddenly fell into his chest and sobbed like he had never seen her do before. Elliot wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into the hallway out of the rain. He could feel her shaking so hard her teeth were chattering and she was swaying on her feet.
"El…"
She started to fall and he scooped her up in his arms and carried her up the stairs to his apartment two at a time. Once inside he headed straight for his bathroom and started the shower going on a warm, but not hot temperature. He didn't want to warm her up too fast. Once it was warm enough, he stood her under the water. He had to hold her up as she was very weak. She tried to pull her sweatshirt over her head but was failing miserably.
"Liv, do you trust me?"
She barely nodded.
"Then let me help you get out of these clothes. You need to warm up."
Her voice responded feebly. "Okay."
She looked up at him with the most lost look he had ever seen. Without ever taking his eyes away from hers, he removed her clothing piece by piece until she was down to her underwear. With the heavy clothing removed, Liv slid down onto the floor of the shower and drew her legs up under her. The water coursed down her back and her shoulders shook with the sobs that continued to spill out of her mouth.
"I can't do this any more El."
Elliot's heart was in his throat. "Talk to me."
"I can't handle it all by myself any more. I can't stop the nightmares any more. I used to be able to let it go. I'd have a glass of wine, or watch some sad movie and cry myself to sleep, but it doesn't work any more. I can't keep doing this job and go home with all this crap in my head to an empty apartment. I need…I need…"
"What do you need, Liv? Tell me and I'll give it to you. Let me help you."
"I can't."
"Why not?'
"Don't you get it?" She barely whispered, "Because I would want it all the time, would need you, all the time, I can't let myself depend on you like that. That's not what we do… not what you want. "
"How do you know what I want, Liv? We never talk about it. Let me be there for you. Let me in. I want in Liv. I just thought you didn't want me, didn't need me."
Deeply troubled brown eyes gazed up disbelieving what she was hearing. She tried to get up and felt herself start to fall as she stepped out of the tub. Elliot wrapped her in a warm towel and pulled her into his embrace.
"I've got you Liv. I've got you. Let me help you….let me love you."
One arm slipped around her waist and the other one went into her cascading locks. Even wet her hair was so soft, so very soft. He pulled a towel off the rack beside them and began to squeeze dry it with one hand.
"Why?"
"What?"
"Why would you want to do that for me? " She was looking at the floor.
Elliot dropped the towel and gently lifted her chin up until her eyes met his. He smiled at her so sweetly and nuzzled her cheek with his nose. His eyes came back to capture hers. She had never seen them so dark. She felt herself melting into the deep pools of blue.
"For two cops that are supposed to be able to read each other without saying a word, we are really bad at actually saying what we feel. I have held these feelings in for too long. It's time to come clean once and for all. It's not like we don't already know it. I'm saying out loud that I love you Liv. I'm hopelessly in love with you. I have been for a really long time. I can't remember when I didn't. You are my partner, my best friend and I wish you were mine in every other way that matters. Every time one of our cases gets to you, I know it. Every time I see that look in your eyes, I want to come to you and hold you and make those feelings go away. I feel like I'm watching the most important person in my life give herself away piece by piece and I'm afraid one day there won't be anything left. I can't lose you Liv. You are my life. Why do you think I keep doing this job, year after year? I do it, so I can be close to you, so I can protect you, so I can love you. I want more now Liv. I want all of you. Will you drop that damn wall once and for all and let me in?"
They stood there for a moment gazing into each other's eyes and then she ever so slightly nodded her head. Her heart was beating so fast, she couldn't find the words to speak.
Elliot allowed himself to breath for the first time in several seconds. It came out as a soft sigh and then he leaned in ever so slowly and tenderly kissed her for the first time in their twelve years together. She tasted so sweet. Elliot pulled her closer and ran his hands through her hair, down along the curve of her neck and then back up to softly trace around the shell of her ear. His thumb brushed across her cheek and when he pulled away from the kiss, he continued to rub it across her kiss-swollen lips. She looked shiny in the light of the bathroom and he knew it was because he was looking at her through eyes brimming with tears.
Olivia reached up to brush the tear that had found its way out and down his face. "If I am dreaming, don't shake me awake like you always do in the crib."
Elliot laughed with a voice rough with emotion and slipped his hand behind her neck. He began to stroke the soft skin below her ear with his thumb.
Olivia shuddered and then shyly smiled at him. "Will you hold the towel for me. I need to get out of this wet underwear."
Elliot's eyes widened but he reluctantly released her, took the towel and held it up, looking away as she slipped off the panties and bra and then accepted the towel to rewrap herself.
"Okay, I'm good."
Elliot let out a groan. "Can we get out of this bathroom now?"
Olivia just nodded and followed him into the bedroom where he pulled a t-shirt and some sleep pants out of his dresser drawers. He placed them in her arms and turned his back while she slipped them on. When she was finished, she reached for his hand and he turned back to her, smiled, and led her over to the bed.
Without saying another word he pulled back the covers and waited while she slipped in. He slipped in beside her and immediately pulled her back into his arms. He had already begun to miss her in the few moments it had taken to get ready.
A collective sigh passed from both of their mouths and they began to laugh at their mutual mind meld. They were so much alike sometimes it was scary.
"Elliot, I need to say some things to you too. I need you to know that what you said tonight was something I have dreamed about you saying for the last 10 or more years. All those years I lived for every time you asked me if I was okay, or you gave me one of your supportive looks. I remember every time you ever touched me or spoke to me gently in the car, or waited for me to go up to my apartment and turn on the lights. I knew you cared about me, but eventually it wasn't enough. I wanted all of you. I just didn't think I could ever have you and eventually all the sadness and grief from the job became too much because I couldn't turn to you. I wanted you so badly. Every time you stood outside my apartment I fought the urge to open that door and fling myself into your arms, but I knew I couldn't. You weren't mine. But maybe now…I love you too El. Hopelessly, madly, deeply, in an almost physically painful way. I think sometimes I fell in love with you that first day we met. You are home for me El. The only one I have ever known."
Elliot gazed into her beautiful brown eyes and his heart skipped a beat. This woman was home for him too. He could just swim around in those chocolate brown pools for the rest of his life.
"You've got me Liv. Please don't ever doubt that again." His lips captured hers in an ever-deepening kiss that seemed to go on forever.
Finally Olivia pulled back, breathless, her eyes shining with new tears and fell into his beautiful blue ones.
"I've got you too, El. I've finally got you."
Notes: Okay, what do you think? Which story? There for You or I've Got You. Let's get those review fingers working. I will happily go back to work on Baby Deals now.
