1. an end and a beginning

Here they all were – her friends, above her on the bridge – Dr. Gensei and Megumi, the little girls Ayame and Suzume, Sano, Tae, Tsubame, and Yahiko. What they were all doing Yamatsu bridge, she couldn't fathom. But it was good to see them after a night away from home. It was surprisingly good to see them. Kaoru didn't expect to miss them all so much after being away just one night. The only person missing was Misao, who was back in Kyoto with Aoshi.

As the ferry went under the bridge, Yahiko yelled down at Kaoru and Kenshin, "Hey! Where have you two been?"

"I'll tell you about it when I get home!" She yelled back at him.

Tae couldn't wait that long. She called out, "Did you two get married?"

Kenshin jumped like he had been struck by lightning and then laughed nervously, scratching his head. Kaoru resisted the urge to smack him and answered back,

"Of course not!"

That Kenshin! So scared of …

Of what? She wasn't exactly sure. Scared of a lot, or scared of a little?

As the ferry putt-putted toward the dock, Kaoru observed the red-haired enigma standing next to her as he settled down and then looked at her out of the corner of his eye, smiling shyly. His face was pink with embarrassment. It made Kaoru want to ask, now that they were far enough away from prying eyes and big ears, why Kenshin was so afraid.

But what exactly was he afraid of? Was it Kaoru's mean right hook? Or maybe the commitment of marriage? Maybe he was afraid of being close to someone again. Or maybe …. Kaoru wondered to herself if Kenshin was a virgin. She didn't think so, even though he acted like it a lot of the time. Megumi had once heard from a patient of hers that Kenshin had been married before.

I should ask him, she thought to herself. He had gone back to looking at the sky and the scenery in front of him. Now was the perfect time.

"Kenshin," she started out.

He turned and smiled at her, "Miss Kaoru, our friends didn't embarrass you?"

She was surprised, "No. But I think they embarrassed you, didn't they." It wasn't a question. It was more like a statement of the obvious.

"Yes," he laughed, "although you know me, I'm easy to embarrass."

"That is true," Kaoru said thoughtfully. They were getting closer and closer to the ferry dock. So close that the ferry was starting to slow down and begin its slow turn to the left. Kaoru eyed the approaching dock and thought about a few things. Maybe now wasn't the best time to ask Kenshin whether he had been married before. And Megumi's advice about being wishy-washy …

"Miss Kaoru?" To her surprise, Kenshin slipped his arm around hers, "Let's not go back to the dojo right away. I think there's something we need to talk about."

Now it was her turn to blush bright pink, "I-I-Is there, Kenshin?"

When she realized the stupid thing she had just said, she corrected herself, "Oh, yes, of course there's something we should talk about!"

As soon as it was safe, Kenshin escorted her off the ferry and onto the wooden dock that led to Osagi Street, "I know of a place where we can have privacy for a few moments and have a cup of tea before we join our friends again."

"Oh, yes!" She giggled, still blushing. There would be no privacy back at the dojo. It was amazing how six months ago the only people in her life were a few students, Dr. Gensei, and his granddaughters. Life had been so calm and quiet then, with every day the same as the day before. When Kenshin arrived like a hurricane with its calm eye, it was the beginning of one crazy summer and a lot of new friends.

"Here we are," Kenshin guided her through the doorway of an unassuming, yet elegant, tea house near the Akabeko.

Still holding her arm, he asked for a private table with tea and a beef hot pot. Kaoru was glad for that. She was getting hungry.

"Wow! This is different," she said as soon as they were seated and the waitress was out of earshot. The tea house, even on a bright fall day, was dark inside. It wasn't busy and full of light like the Akabeko. And while the Akabeko was for everyone, the patrons of this tea house were wealthy and reserved. And quiet. Kaoru made a mental note to keep her voice down.

After the tea arrived and the waitress left again, Kenshin got down to business, "Miss Kaoru, I brought you here to say thank you for welcoming me at your dojo and giving me a home. That is more than anyone has ever done for me. I can't express how much this means to me. I … and, too, I .…" He looked into her innocent blue eyes for a moment and then looked away, surprised by the sudden emotion washing over him.

It was time to tell her about Tomoe. And Tomoe's death. And how it all sent him wandering, so many years ago. Kaoru was so young, just barely 18. He and Tomoe had been young once, too, but never so sheltered as Kaoru. Of all the things Kenshin hoped for in her life, he hoped that she would never hold her dying lover in her arms, hopeless, guilt-ridden, and unable to save him.

Just when he thought he'd accepted Tomoe's death, new and fresh heartache would cut a swath of destruction through his soul deeper than what any enemy could do. What made it worse was that he couldn't bring himself to tell anyone what happened to Tomoe. Kaoru deserved to know, but how could he say it? My lover died by my own hand.

"Kenshin?" She reached over and touched his arm, "What's wrong? You look ill all of a sudden."

He gathered himself together, "My apologies, Miss Kaoru!" He gave her his best sunny smile, "You deserve better company than this one, that you do."

He was relieved when the beef hot pot arrived. It gave him time to think and ready himself for what the two of them needed to discuss. He was old enough to know his own heart and his feelings for Kaoru, but was she old enough to know her own heart? She had feelings for him, no doubt about that. Or was it a passing infatuation? It would be unfair of him to take advantage of a girl as innocent as a child. Best to leave her be for awhile before …

"Kenshin," Kaoru started out again, getting her nerve up, "I've known this for awhile now. I thought I might as well go ahead and say it."

He pinned a piece of radish and a piece of beef together with his chopsticks and brought them from hot pot to his plate to his mouth, listening all the while.

"I love you."

What?!? He took a deep breath, his mind scrambling, she said it! I can't believe it – I love you! And right here, at the tea house! There was no avoiding it now. From here on out, both of their lives would be taking a path different than what he had planned. That was for sure.

And then he noticed he wasn't breathing.

"Kenshin?" Kaoru threw down her dining utensils, "Speak to me! You're not choking, are you?"

Megumi had once saved Yahiko from choking to death on a piece of yam, but before she had Sano squeeze the wind out of him, she had asked Yahiko to speak to her. When he couldn't, she had Sano go to work dislodging the piece of food from Yahiko's wind pipe.

"Hey! Here you guys are!" The delicate curtain separating the two from the rest of the patrons was suddenly flung to one side, without any manners at all, to reveal Sano and the rest of the gang. "You're eating without us?!?"

Megumi rushed in from behind Sano, "What's going on here? Oh, Sir Ken! Your face is blue!" She pushed Kaoru out of the way and went to work saving him, "Help me, Sano, he's choking!"

Yahiko slid between both of them, "Oooh, yummy! Beef hot pot!"

Sano gave Kenshin a good squeeze and sent a piece of beef flying out of his mouth. It barely missed Dr. Gensei.

"How are you, little Kaoru? We were worried about you last night when you didn't come home," Dr. Gensei said, oblivious to the emergency situation looming around him, "But then we were pretty sure you were safe with Kenshin here."

Ayame and Suzume bounced in after him, I'm hungry! I'm hungry, too!

Bringing up the rear were Tsubame and Tae.

"I'm just sorry the Akabeko isn't open today!" Tae said happily and sat down next to Yahiko, who was stuffing his mouth, "But I did always want to try the food here."

Oh, I give up, Kaoru thought to herself, but at least I said it. Now Kenshin can't pretend he doesn't know.

She watched, feeling slightly victorious and slightly defeated, as everyone attacked the hot pot with abandon, except for Megumi, who was still bringing Kenshin back from the brink of death. She poured another cup of tea for him and wondered what would happen next.