Tales of the Tortallans A/N ok well this is my 1st fic so don't be mean and flames are not welcome

Oh yeah. disclaimer.. I don't own any of these characters.. they all belong to the fabulous Tamora Pierce though I wish I owned them.. n e wayz.. all I own is the plot so don't sue me plz oh yah.. other A/N I had help writing this from my friend Lady Lily

Our show begins in an old abandoned warehouse fixed up for a Tortallann style talk show. On the ceiling a disco ball is visible and there are 2 big red poofy couches and 2 big red poofy chairs.

Disembodied Voice: Hello and welcome to Tales of Tortallans! Hosted by the lovely Lady Kel of Queenscove and Lady Lily!

Lady Kel: Thanks DV! I will be hosting todays episode of Tales of Tortallans along with my good friend Lady Lily! How bout a round of applause for her! Lady Lily.. where are you??* looks all around and under the couches*

Disembodied Voice: I cant work like this! I will be in my trailor!* walks offstage* Lady Kel: Oh not again! This is the third time this week! * follows Disembodied Voice offstage* * runs into Lady Lily* Oh there you are! We've been looking everywhere for you!

Lady Lily: Oh sorry! I couldn't find my lucky shoes! Then when I found them I lost my lucky bracelet! Hey where is DV going?

Lady Kel: To his trailor. He says that he refuses to work like this. You better go after him.

Lady Lily: Ok. * follows DV to his trailor * Hi DV!

Disembodied Voice: * blushes* Hi Lady Lily!

Lady Lily: Will you pleeeeeease come back? For me? * does the puppy dog pout *

Disembodied Voice: Oh alright. * follows Lady Lily back onstage * announces * Time for today's episode of Tales of Tortallans!

Unknown crewmember:* holds up sign that says CLAP in big flashing letters *

Audience: * claps *

Lady Kel: Thank you everyone! Now for today's special guests! How bout a round of applause for Keladry of Mindelan and Cleon of Kennan!

Keladry: * walks out dragging a nervous looking Cleon* sits down on big red poofy couch next to Cleon

Lady Lily: Hi Keladry and Cleon! Welcome to Tales of Tortallans! Cleon: *looks nervous * points at cameras * Are those things on??

Lady Kel: Yes but don't worry! Only a few million Tortallans are watching! * smiles brightly *

Cleon:* runs offstage crying * I want my moooomyyyyyy!!!! Waaaaaaah!!!!!!

Keladry: * hits head with hand * Not again! Cleon! *runs after Cleon *

Lady Lily: That went well.

Lady Kel: Um yeah. sure. *smiles brightly * I know!!! DV come here! * whispers something in DV's ear*

Disembodied Voice: * smiles * * announces * Now for Karaoke Time!!! Yay!!!

A blonde woman comes out in a pink dress with lots of frills, lace and bows. Pink lights flash over the blonde woman.

Blonde Woman: Hi everyone! I'm Josiane ex-princess of the Copper Isles! Now this song is for all you little evil doers out there! * pauses to take breath* * begins to sing * Oops I did it again! Went a little crazy! Ooh baby baby! Oops I did it again! I killed a black cat! Then got cut in half! Oh Jonny Jonny! Faithful comes out wearing a purple sequined jacket with a bow tie and a purple sequined top hat.

Fathful: * stands on hind legs * * picks up microphone * * starts to sing * But I will survive! I will survive! It took all the strength I had not to fall apart -

Lady Kel and Lady Lily: * push Faithful and Josiane off the stage* Wow what a performance!

Lady Kel: Now for our interview with Roger from the Realms of the Dead!

Lady Lily: * pushes button *

A big screen comes out of the floor and the lights dim. The screen starts playing the interview with Roger.

OK HOW DID YOU LIKE THAT?? I am so excited cuz that's my first fic! Yay!! Well did ya love it? Hate it? Let me know!! Oh yeah and for the interview with Roger. I need you guys 2 review with questions you have for Roger and that will be the interview ok? Plz plz plz review!!!! * gets down on knees and begs * plz !!!!!!! I will be grateful 2 all those who review. as for those who don't. I am close friends with the Lioness!!!!! Hehe the more reviews I get the happier I am and the quicker the next chapter will be posted!!!!!