Hi all! It's been a while since I've written something, and this randomly came to me. Short and drabble-like, I know. Sorry for the excessive use of hyphens, this site takes out "excessive" spacing, even though it isn't visually pleasing to read a wall of text.
This is set between the game and Advent Children, and is disregarding the canon on the fact that Tseng is alive. Deal. Anyways, I don't own the game or anything else, etc.
Read, Review, and Enjoy!
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Are sins ever forgiven?
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When I was a Turk, we were taught to live in the present, no future, and no past.
Now, Shinra is gone. Destroyed along with my hopes and dreams. The glory of being a Turk, of having the ability to do whatever you wanted, is fading. It wasn't real anyways. We were all trapped by Shinra, like flies in a spider's web.
A year after my life crashed along with the Shinra building, and the Sector 7 pillar.
One full year. Alone.
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I've been living in the slums, along with the others who are too stupid or toocrazy to move out. The filth and debris has multiplied at least 10 times since the Sephiroth incident. These parts have turned into a lawless haven for people who don't want to be found. Like me.
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The new city, Edge. They live there. At least some of them do. Avalanche. The heroes of the story. I wonder if they stop and think about the past, do they remember me? The smart ass red head Turk who had no worries.
Well, it's been a year. One whole year of being stared at and shunned. The people who live here still remember. A long instilled fear is the only thing that stays their hand.
I wonder when that instinct will fade?
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I haven't seen Rude or Elena in a year. They've probably moved on. They were from the plate anyways. Us slum rats, we were born here and we'll die here. That's called fate for you.
If my friends are gone, then what do I do, you ask?
Drink, smoke, and come here. The first time I saw some of those heroes of the story was here. The order from high up was to capture her, but we've been trying forever, and hell if I was going to get hurt fighting that punk with her. Letting them get away was so easy, something I shouldn't have done. It would have made the pillar a lot easier. Seeing their faces when they saw her in our helicopter made a feeling deep inside stir. Something that I've tried to repress for so long.
Something like sympathy. The same situation when my parents were taken away by Shinra, and later killed. Twisted little world that I end up being what I despised. Fate is cruel.
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In this place, I feel like I could be forgiven. Is it a memory, or her? Maybe if we hadn't taken her away, she wouldn't be dead right now. Avalanche remembers her, but I remember her too. Even though I don't wear those stupid ribbons, it's not like I've forgotten.
Avalanche only lost her, but it's not like we didn't have casualties either. Most of them deserved to die, but I lost the person who was most like a father to me. I would've died in the gang wars if it wasn't for him making me something bigger. Making me into an emotionless killing machine.
Doesn't his death equal what Avalanche lost? We deserve it though. We deserve it for being Turks.
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This place, her place, makes me feel like my life had a purpose. Sure, a purpose to kill millions of innocent people. To have other countless millions hate me for what I've done.
Would anyone ever want to live for that purpose?
If there was a way to atone for sins, I would've tried it already. My sins don't even have a good excuse, it was just my job. All along, it was just a job. That's what I want to think.
Sins don't have excuses, do they?
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I don't know why I come here. I think I'm ready to forgive myself for what I've done.
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The question is, will anyone forgive me?
