The 18th green butterfly

I can't, I just fucking can't believe you just left…

Not even a fucking letter! Not even the decency to come up to my face and tell me that you were going to leave.

18…

What was once 17 today became 18…

Eighteen people, eighteen people I've lost.

I remember reading something and those words are something that will always stay with me "bye, bye butterfly" I read it when I was young, Ha muds you didn't even think I could read did you? Well I can!

Well when my Gran died, everyone from my family came to say goodbye to her, I couldn't stand it the people talking about nothing. Yeah and I'm not even the brightest. But still couldn't stand it so I went and took a book from out of the bookshelf and I picked a page.

'I loved her, I've always loved her. But she is no longer mine. I knew that this would be my last hug, so I whispered something in her ear. "Bye, Bye Butterfly" I hope she knew what it meant. And like that she was gone. Away, out of my arms no longer mine but of something bigger than us.'

Those were the exact words, I still remember them even if you hit me in the head twice with your car. I may not remember the title but that's what was on the page I had read of the book.

"Bye, bye butterfly" the words still swirl around my head.

My Gran… she was the first butterfly bark blue and beautiful. It's also tattooed right under the hair line of my neck, the words and the butterfly's. I was 16 when I gotten it tattooed first only the words and the single small dark blue butterfly a few weeks later two friends of mine died in a car crash adding another two butterfly's, this time Light blue and orange.

Years went by, a few more butterfly's in different colors.

Then there was Paula. She also became a small light pink butterfly on my neck.

Then after the first album with you and the others we split up so I meet different people and seeing as there's a pattern in my life where ever I go. Another few where added, including my father. Making it 16 butterfly's

Then we were back! Happy the whole band together again. Yet again things happen and Noodle was gone, seeing as we thought she would never come back, I added a new butterfly it was bigger than the others and this one was purple, this one making the number 17.

Yet again years passed by no more butterfly's where added.

And Once again after plastic beach the band was back together! We were all happy, Noodle was back and Russel was sane. I showed her all the butterflies and she asked why the purple one was bigger and I told her it was her butterfly. And it was bigger because she made a big impact in my life.

I guess that you are wondering what this has to do with you now don't ya Murdoc.

You and only you are the 18 butterfly, the biggest butterfly hiding behind my ear. You are the green butterfly out of all 18 you are the green one and the only green one.

I only wish my last words to you could have been

"Bye, bye butterfly"

Bye,

Bye

My green

Butterfly

Stu pot ( aka your 2 dents )