Title: Moving On
Author: Chickiee-Dee
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Alias or anything associated with it.
Summary: Sequel to Final Goodbye. Sydney POV.
Authors Notes: This idea came to me a while ago, and I wasn't sure about whether I should write it or not, but why not?? I want to dedicate this to all my readers and reviewers but especially Natalie who is so consistent in her reviews. I truly love receiving your reviews, they provide me with so much inspiration. Its all you people that I write for, so thank you so much and heres the story…
Moving OnThe first date was the hardest. It'd been so long since I'd been on a date with anyone and the first date jitters were back in full force. His name was Peter, a perfectly respectable man, who I meet at the Gym. I'd been back at the CIA for almost a year and had worn myself to the point of exhaustion, not that Kendall noticed. Weiss did though and went to Devlin, who ordered me to take a couple of weeks off.
I spent much of that time at the Gym, working out my frustrations. By now, I was beginning to get used to being alone, although I still thought about Vaughn frequently. On the first anniversary of his death I finally took off my wedding and engagement rings and I wore them around my neck on a gold chain.
I was doing laps in the pool when he approached me. "Ahem" I looked up from the edge of the water "Hi, I've seen you around here a fair bit lately."
"Yeah, do you have a problem with that?" I asked angrily.
"No, I just wanted to introduce myself, I'm Peter."
"Sydney."
"I was wondering if you'd like to grab a cup of coffee?" he stood there nervously, while I contemplated his offer. "I'd like that."
"Would you like to go now, I mean, if your not busy."
"Um sure, I'll just get changed."
"Of course, I'll meet you out front." I nodded and walked towards the change rooms. After a quick shower I threw my jeans and a singlet top on, fastened the gold chain around my neck and slid my sunglasses on. I put my shoes on and grabbed my bag, throwing it over my shoulder, and walked through the glass doors and onto the footpath. Peter was standing out the front and for the first time I got a decent look at him. He was about 5 foot 10 and had dirty blonde hair, similar to Vaughn's. When he turned to face me, I saw his big brown eyes, similar to my own. I watched as a smile spread across his face when I walked up. "Hey."
"Hi."
"Where did you want to go?"
"Not sure, how about you?"
"How about Dukes?"
"Don't know it."
"It's a couple of blocks over, near the beach."
"Ok, sounds good, lead the way." Peter nodded and we climbed into our cars.
A few minutes later we stopped out the front of a small café. Several tables littered the sidewalk and two dumpy couches were next to the window. The décor was simple, with a noticeable beach theme. There were photos of the ocean framed on the wall and the walls were a sandy colour. The tables and chairs looked similar to what I had on my porch, and covered much of the wooden floor. A large menu board covered the wall above the counter and various sea creatures were attached on either side of it. Peter walked up to counter and ordered two cappuccinos. We sat at one of the tables near the window and upon closer inspection, the place seemed deserted. I slid my sunglasses up so they sat on top of my head and I began to play with the rings that hung from my neck, something I'd begun doing when I was nervous. Peter looked over and saw my nervousness, he looked at the chain, "Nice rings." I smiled,
"Thank you. The man who gave them to me was very special." 'Damn it Syd,' I cursed myself, 'This isn't about Vaughn.' I looked up and saw Peter looking at me curiously, "I'm sorry" I apologised, "I haven't been out with someone in a long time."
"That's ok. I understand. So Sydney, what do you do for a living?" I was about to answer him when the waitress bought our drinks over, "I work for the State Department, how bout you?"
"I work for a bank." I nearly choked on my drink,
"You work for a bank?"
"Yeah, why do people think that's so weird?"
"I'm sorry, I used to work for a bank, till I started at the State Department."
"Really, which one?"
"Um, Credit Dauphine."
"Oh yeah, that place shut down didn't it?"
"I assume so, I left a few years ago." We stayed in that café talking for a few hours. Early that afternoon Weiss called me, "Hello."
"Syd, whats up?"
"Nothin Weiss, why?"
"Well…"
"Well what Eric Weiss?"
"Kendall wants you to come in."
"Devlin gave me time off though."
"Yes, but Kendall wants you to come in, he wants you and Harding for an op."
"Yeah, I'll be in as soon as I can. See ya."
"Bye." I hung up the phone and looked at Peter,
"I'm sorry, I have to go to work." I stood up and was getting ready to leave, when Peter grabbed my hand lightly, "Sydney, I'd love to see you again." I smiled,
"I'd like that too, but I may have to take a business trip, I'm not sure how long I'll be gone. I'll call you when I get home."
"Ok, heres my number." He wrote it down on my hand and gave it a quick kiss, "See you Sydney."
"Bye Peter." I left that little café feeling marginally happier.
I went into the Ops Centre that day and Kendall immediately assigned me on a mission. Although, I was so happy that I listened to Harding babble on about his mother and his dog for the entire flight, or until I fell asleep at least. We were sent to infiltrate a storage facility in Poland. By the time I returned home two days later, I was exhausted. We'd encountered trouble on the way out and I had to fight off three guards, who were trying to kill us. It wasn't the most ideal situation, and I slept most of the way home, which meant when I woke up I was stiff and sore.
I walked into my apartment and dumped my bag in the hallway. I picked up the pile of mail that was near the door and flopped onto the couch to read it. Before long, I had fallen asleep and I woke up hours later to Weiss banging on my door, "Come on Bristow, open up. I've got dinner." I stood up slowly and opened the door, "I was sleeping."
"Well, hello to you too miss cranky pants. I'm sorry for thinking that you'd want something to eat."
"Sorry Weiss, I'm just tired, that's all." He came in and we sat down to eat the Chinese that he had thoughtfully provided. "So Syd," he said after a while, "Who were you with when I called the other day?"
"What?"
"Who were you with?"
"Peter, I met him at the Gym, we went out for coffee."
"What does he do?"
"Works for a bank." Weiss started to laugh,
"He works for a bank?"
"Ya-huh," he began to laugh even harder,
"Sorry Syd, its just, trust you to date someone who works for a bank… especially, you know, since it was your cover for I dunno how long."
"The irony isn't lost on me either."
"What did you say you did?"
"Worked at the State Department, it was…" I trailed off,
"Vaughn's cover… I know."
"I miss him so much. I feel like I'm cheating on him, when I know I'm not… he'd want me to move on… wouldn't he?" Several tears began rolling down my cheeks, Weiss wiped them away. "Syd, you don't need to feel guilty, Vaughn, he'd want you to be happy, and if you think this guy will make you happy, then I'm gonna be here for you."
I looked into his eyes and saw the sincerity in them, "Thanks Weiss."
"No problem Syd." We finished eating in silence. After dinner, I switched on the TV and grabbed a couple of beers from the fridge. I handed one to Weiss and watched as he flicked through the channels, trying to find something to watch. He stopped on the hockey, "Hey the Kings are playing. Wanna watch."
"Yeah, why not?" my voice was shaky and I attempted to hold back tears, letting only one escape. Weiss noticed and made a move to change the channel, "We don't have to watch it Syd, if you don't want too."
"Nah, its fine." I took a few deep breaths in an effort to compose myself and Weiss grabbed me in a big hug. I rested my head in his shoulder and eventually drifted off to sleep.
I was woken up by the loud ringing of my phone. When I made a move to answer it, I noticed that Weiss had already picked it up, "Hello?" he said into the receiver.
"Hello, I was looking for Sydney" a male voice answered.
"Who is this?" Weiss questioned.
"Peter Markham. Sydney said that she was going to call me, is she there?"
"She's sleeping."
"Who are you? Sydney said she wasn't seeing anyone."
"Syd and I aren't together, she was married to my best friend. I'm Eric."
"You called her the other day."
"Yeah." I sat there for a while, listening to Weiss's end of the conversation,
"Weiss, who is it?" He stuck his hand over the speaker,
"Its Peter."
"Gimme the phone." He nodded.
"Peter, hang on, I'll just get Syd."
"Thanks." Weiss handed me the phone,
"Hi Peter, I was gonna call you tomorrow."
"Sorry to wake you, I was just wondering if you wanted to see a movie tomorrow night?"
"Um, sure. Can I ask you something?"
"Yeah."
"How'd you get my number?"
"Marnie at the Gym told me."
"Uh-huh."
"I'll pick you up at eight?"
"Yeah, how do you know, wait let me guess, Marnie gave you my address too."
"Yes, she did, I'll see you tomorrow at eight?"
"Sure. Bye."
"Bye." I hung up the phone and plopped myself onto the couch.
I was so nervous about going out with someone else. Truthfully, I hadn't been on a date since Vaughn died, and my nerves almost made me call and cancel. In an effort to calm myself, I went to the cemetery. I hadn't been for a while, and I felt horribly guilty.
I slid to the ground in front of the granite headstone, laying a large bouquet of flowers in front of me. "Hey baby," I said, looking around, to see if there was anyone else there. I was alone. "I met this guy. His names Peter and he works for a bank. He's sweet. I met him at the Gym. We're going out tonight. He's taking me to the movies." I wiped away a tear, "I feel so horrible, like I'm dishonouring your memory or something. Everyone tells me that you'd want me to move on, but I'm not sure. I meant what I told you, that day when…when…that day when you died. My heart, its always yours, always has been, always will be. I love you forever and always Vaughn, I hope you know that." I kissed my hand and pressed it onto the soft grass that covered Vaughn's grave.
I sat there for hours that day, content to just be near him. I still loved Vaughn, I never denied that, but I also knew that one day I'd have to move on with my life, and maybe, just maybe, Peter was the one to help me do that. When I finally left, my legs ached, partly from the mission and partly because they'd been kept tucked underneath me for so long. By the time I made it home, I didn't have long to get ready, so I just threw a pair of jeans and a top on. Peter was very punctual, he showed up on my doorstep at eight o'clock sharp, carrying a bouquet of flowers. I accepted them graciously and invited him inside while I put them in water.
"Come in. I'll just put these in water." I headed off to the kitchen, looking for a vase, while Peter looked around my apartment nervously. "Nice place," he commented.
"Thanks." I continued to dig around the cupboards, and mentally cursed myself for leaving my Wedding pictures on the kitchen table. I'd been looking at them again that morning, and had abandoned them when I went to the cemetery. After a few minutes of rifling through almost every cupboard in the kitchen, I pulled out a glass vase that we'd received as a wedding present. I filled it with water and arranged the flowers in it. I sat them on the coffee table in the lounge and went over to where Peter was standing near the kitchen table. "I'm sorry, I should have put those away," I said, motioning to the thick photo albums. "Its ok," he replied.
"I'm ready to go." He nodded and we walked out the door.
I have to admit, I had an alright time that night. Peter was incredibly sweet and gracious, and we went out for coffee again afterwards. We saw each other a lot after that night. The two of us even dared to go on a few double dates with Weiss and his latest 'catch', his words, not mine. I think we'd been together for five months before I slept with him. I kept making excuses in my head, that 'it was too soon'; that 'I'd be cheating on Vaughn'; that 'I didn't feel anything for him'; that 'he was only after one thing from me'. Weiss took the brunt of my insecurities. I poured my soul out to him many times, usually after what he deemed, 'late night therapy sessions'. According to Weiss (who proclaimed that he was as good a shrink as Barnett), I had 'issues', but Dr Weiss didn't expand on his diagnosis, (I think he'd had way too much vodka by that point). Whatever the reason, when Peter and I did finally sleep together, it was like a huge weight was lifted from my chest, even though the next day I cursed myself for betraying Vaughn and his memory. Weiss had to literally slap some sense into me.
I banged on Weiss's door and a few seconds later he opened it, looking slightly annoyed. I pushed my way inside and sat down on his couch. I took the lid off the bottle I held in my hand and took a swig. "I betrayed Vaughn." Weiss looked confused. "I cheated on him, I betrayed his memory. How could I do that, I promised to love him forever…and I didn't."
"Syd, what are you talking about?"
"I slept with Peter. I betrayed Vaughn." Next thing I knew, Weiss's hand was raised and he swung it sharply, connecting with my jaw. "What was that for?"
"Syd, you're being stupid. Vaughn would want you to move on with your life. You didn't betray him by sleeping with someone else." I sat there, trying to process what Weiss had told me. I lifted the bottle to my lips, preparing to take another swig, but Weiss grabbed it from my grip. "No more for you Bristow. Drinking is not the answer."
I've never admired Weiss more than I did that day. If he hadn't have slapped me, I wouldn't drank myself to oblivion and I probably would've screwed things with Peter. We continued our relationship and on our first anniversary, we moved in together. That first night, I saw Vaughn in a dream…
"Syd, I'm not mad that you've moved on. I love you, and I'm glad that you've found someone to make you happy. Just remember I'm watching over you, and I always will be. I love you, forever and always." His image dissolved from my mind, but his essence remained.
Peter proposed eighteen months later. I was sitting at home, looking through old photo albums, I'd just gotten home from another mission in Italy, and was exhausted, but being in Italy dragged up old memories, and I felt this need to see his bright face again. I still kept photos of both Vaughn and Danny spread throughout the apartment. Peter knew about both of them, and didn't mind me keeping the pictures out. I didn't hear Peter come in until he was standing next to me.
"Hey," he said softly.
"Hey, I didn't hear you come in." He notices the photo albums,
"Reminiscing huh?"
"Yeah."
"How was Italy?" I'd told Peter about my work for the CIA before we moved in together, although I couldn't be specific about what my missions were, I just told him where I was going. "Tiring. I could've kicked Harding's arse. He was being all juvenile and annoying on the plane."
"You've been thinking about him, haven't you?" Peter asks, referring to Vaughn.
"Yeah, Italy bought back memories."
"How long you home for?"
"I'm going to Russia day after tomorrow with Weiss."
"Well he's better company than Harding. Be careful, won't you?"
"Of course."
"Sydney, there's something I've been meaning to ask you…"
"Yeah."
"Sydney, you mean everything to me, when I'm with you, I feel complete. I guess what I'm trying to say is, Sydney, will you marry me?" I sat there in stunned silence, after a few minutes I gathered up the strength to answer, "Yes. I will."
That was three months ago, and now we're busy planning our wedding. I walk up to our front door and open it, finding my fiancé sitting at the table, flipping through random magazines, making little notes on one of the pads that we have spread throughout the apartment. It's my turn to sneak up on him now. Using my spy skills I slip into the apartment unnoticed and grab his shoulders, jerking him from his reverie. "Hey Syd. You gave me a fright."
"Sorry."
"What did the doctor say?"
"Well…"
"What?"
"Peter, I'm pregnant." Those three words roll effortlessly off my tongue, and though I wish I were saying it to Vaughn, for the first time since Vaughn's untimely death, I feel at peace. I never expected to fall in love again after Vaughn, but something in my head tells me that this time everything's going to work out alright.
The End
A/N: What did you think? Was it good, bad, or horrible? I'm not sure about the end. But when I typed those last words, a lightbulb went off in my head…and it screamed 'sequel'. What do you think, should I do a sequel? Let me know. I'll try and update my other stories soon too (next chapter of Summer Lovin' was posted with this), but until next time… LOL Alyce :D :P
