Not Worth Remembering

iShinee: This is a one-shot I wrote when I was feeling a bit lonely. It's based off 'No Pretense' by PropertyoftheUchiha. It's a great piece of work.

Not Worth Remembering

I was scum. Filth. I had no place here. All I did was mar it with my poisonous existence. Everybody I had met in my life, I had left with no regret.

I sit in a tent now. I had finally, after 3 years of hard work, avenged. Avenged my clan, avenged my mother and father. But, the victory I had expected never came. The victory was meant to taste bitter sweet, but all I could taste was the overwhelming bitterness that lay in my heart.

In those last few seconds, I saw all the memories flood back. The memories I had tried to suppress and lock away deep inside, never to be found again.

When we were brothers, he would carry me on his back, because I had injured myself. Sometimes I did it on purpose, just so my brother would carry me home. I relished those moments when he would piggy back me. He taught me about the Konoha Police and our history. Although in contact we were close, but Itachi was always at a distance. No matter how hard I tried to get closer and closer, he'd just move away, like the way you approach the horizon. You could walk for miles and miles and never get near it.

He would try and offer me sweet treats, like dango, but I always said I didn't like them. I hated sweets. He knew it, but it wouldn't stop him from offering.

And every time I'd ask him to train me, he'd make up an excuse and poke me gently on the forehead.

Now, I had my sword driven through him.

He made no move to evade the final blow, almost as if he was waiting for it to happen.

"Why didn't you move?" I whispered in between pants of breath. "You knew."

"I knew." he repeated.

"Why?"

His lips curled into a smirk. "Because..."

His eyes drooped. And at that moment, I saw him as my brother, not the man who killed everyone I knew and loved.

"You are not worth killing."

And like my brother always did, he poked me gently on my forehead, before falling to the ground, cold and dead.

My eyes began to bleed. I didn't know what was happening. Karin, unlike Suigetsu and Jungo, had come back.

"You have no business here now." I said, my hand covered in the blood I had tried to wipe away from my eyes.

"I chose to stay."

"Why?"

"Because it was my choice."

I woke up, my wounds bandaged and healed. That foolish bitch.

My eyes had been bound by a bandage. It may as well have been; I didn't want to see anybody.

"Sasuke-kun." I heard the rustling of the blankets and felt somebody beside me. A hand touched mine, which I knocked away violently.

That touch, reminded me of somebody else I had left behind, someone who had been there always for me, yet I pushed her away, threw her away like a crumpled piece of paper. She held my hand when I was in pain; she protected me at the cost to her own body, and somehow, kept my hopes alive. I am aware now, the reasons why she was so concerned for me. Because she cared.

"What are you still doing here?"

"I..."

"I don't need you anymore."

I knew the words hurt, but it didn't stop me from speaking them. There was a long pause, just the steady rhythm of our breathing kept my senses alive.

"You know what?" I felt her stand up. I felt her glare. "You really are a bastard."

I heard the rustle of the tent opening and she was gone.

I had no need to hurt others. Before, it was something that needed to be done, but now, there was no purpose for it. I had no purpose.

Somehow, I knew, they had already found Itachi's body. And now they were looking for me. But it didn't matter. I would be long gone by the time they find me. Everyone would be better off. I was scum, the worst kind of scum. It was a good thing that they didn't know. They didn't know that, deep inside, I hated being like this. Hurting everyone because I had to.

I knew I wasn't worth their time. I had nothing to do now, but to rot away. What reason would they have to save me?

Coming off as the worst kind of scum, I wasn't worth remembering.


Not a day passes by without me thinking of him. To him, I was annoying and I always got in the way of things. I wasn't worth his time. To him, time was precious.

"You're annoying." His words hit like thunder, deep down into my heart. But it didn't matter, I still loved him.

The rest of the night passed by in a blur. All I can remember after were his last words to me.

"Thank you..."

And then nothing.

I wonder what he thinks of, but immediately realise it's a stupid thing to think of. He wanted to avenge his clan. Restore it. What else could be on his mind?

Every night before I go to bed, I realise that, somewhere, he might be asleep, or planning his next move.

I used to think I understood him, the loneliness he talked about, but really, I was only fooling myself. Who was I to him? Only an annoying girl he was forced to work with. But when I think of all the missions we've accomplished together, were we really that far apart?

I realise now, three years down the track, that our relationship, is only what I see in my head. He doesn't give a damn, it's all been me. It has all been one sided.

That didn't stop me from loving him.

If only we could be what we were before. I wish for it so much.

Every time the phrase "Team 7" emerges in anyone's conversation, I know it is defined by "Naruto future Rokudaime, Sasuke the Traitor, and Sakura the useless one." Even in the academy, they don't have Team 7 anymore. The academy students know why.

The other villagers consider him a traitor. If he ever returned to Konoha, he'd be killed immediately. But I didn't see him as a traitor who needed to be killed, I saw him as someone I cared about, loved, who needed saving. And if I were to betray the village in order to save him, I would.

I want to be the person who meant the world to him. Who was always the person in his arms before he fell asleep.

But deep down, I knew, to him, I wasn't worth his time. I wasn't worth remembering.