Usako ch.1

My life is pretty average…I should say was pretty average…I was 10 when everything happened, my families world turned upside down. It started when my Mom Ikuko, a lovely woman inside and out was stricken with ovarian cancer. She wasn't too shocked however, as her Mother had died of cancer.

She'd started showing strange symptoms so Dad had her go see the doctor. He performed the necessary tests and within weeks we found out she had the cancer. Dad was saddened by the news and completely distraught that his beautiful wife would have very little time left in this world.

They met each other in their last year of high school and were never with anyone but each other…a timeless love that as a young child I envied. He loved her so much.

Dad's job as a newspaper editor helped pay the bills! He knew I could only help around the house as I was so young. However I was at the age where they were able to tell me the truth about her condition and how long she had left to live. I knew Dad was going to be going through a rough time watching the woman he loved more than anything die while he had to go on without her.

He didn't mind having us kids, he loved us…but he loved Mom more…and knowing she wouldn't be there…as my Mother slowly depleted I took care of her while Dad worked as much as he could to pay for the medication. Everyday after school I came straight home to help her.

At first she was able to handle herself, but soon became too exhausted to do a lot. Shingo, my little brother, who was only six, didn't understand what was going on due to his age. He often got frustrated wondering why Mom could no longer play with him and ran off in angry confusion.

I asked my Dad to tell him but seeing as how Shingo was really close to Mom he didn't want to hurt him by telling him 'Mommy's going to die soon'. Dad felt it was best to keep him in the dark…for now. She went through all the 'Doctor's stuff', as I had called it at the time, to get better.

However her condition had been diagnosed too late and she was too far gone by the time she'd seen her Doctor. The Doctor's said they couldn't do much, so in the end we only ever saw her with IV tubes for breathing. After a while I couldn't bear to be around her, but I still wanted to have some precious memories.

Our Dad's Sister saw the hardship he was going through and decided to come and help out for a little while. With the medical bills piling up Dad was getting worse at work with all the stress. Then Mom took a dramatic turn and died in her sleep one night. So silent…and I didn't even know she had gone.

That had been a hard night for everyone, asleep in our beds I heard Dad's muffled cries from their room. I woke up to see him hovering over her, holding her close. His mumbled words couldn't be distinguished. Slumping onto the floor I sat outside the room that night just incase he needed me.

When Mom died it was hard on everyone, and what made it worse for me was that she died three months before I turned 11. The whole turn of events happened in less than a year. Dad's sister stayed with us for the rest of the year.

But I couldn't watch Dad deal with her death and then ask him to lend a shoulder to cry on. His job suffered a bit but after everything had been arranged funeral wise he threw himself into his work at the office. So I don't think he truly ever dealt with her death back then.

However I didn't either, because I never had anyone to talk to. Dad made himself super busy at work and Auntie made Shingo her priority to help since he was close. But what about me? Was I selfish for thinking that way? Even though I took care of Mom after I came home from school. I helped out and I was there yet no one bothered to see if I needed some comfort.

I felt weak, and needy it was a bad feeling to have, even months later I still felt it. I didn't want to feel the pain of her loss anymore. I wanted to be numb to it all. So I made a decision that I would regret forever. At the time Dad was still in a huge grieving process so he didn't notice when I started to skip school.

Then as I got a little older I got in with some bad crowds and dumped my old friends. I went with them wherever and did whatever they did which mostly included drugs of nearly any kind. At first I was scared till one of them said 'You won't feel a thing'. I snatched it up fast.

And like most addicts all it took me was one hit and I was addicted. Heroin became my nirvana…my painless little nirvana. I kept it hidden from my Dad and from those that were close to me. I was on it for years spending every last penny I had on it. I even stole from my Dad when he wasn't looking or paying attention.

Finally I hit rock bottom. I had just turned 16 when I stole my Dad's car, while high mind you, and hit someone. It was the wake up call I needed but wish it hadn't come in this particular form. Luckily she was in a car herself so there was minimal damage but it required hospitalization.

The cop that was there saw it all.

After being booked for under the influence of narcotics and driving a car that wasn't mine without a license or insurance I was taken to the station. Dad picked me up having left Shingo at home with Auntie. "Usagi…" he said. His head was hung down in shame and I felt like shit for my actions.

Of all the feelings to feel now 'shit' was right at the top of the list. I had never once before disappointed my Dad however…it was bright within his eyes now. I knew he wanted to yell at me, but the officer less that 15 feet away writing down his last minute report was still there.

"If you don't shape up you will no longer be able to live in our home. As it is I'm having Shingo live with your Auntie in Kyoto so that you can get better." I felt horrible that it was Shingo who had to go. It was my fault that everything happened but Dad also had said that he needed to help me.

"You remind me so much of her…my little girl." I knew he was referring to Mom. Our personalities were mirror images of each other; often times Dad would get overruled by us both when I was growing up. I was charged and as I was still a minor the consequences weren't too severe.

The lady in the car lived and as punishment I was to get a job and work to pay off her hospital bills. I only saw her one time and that was in the hospital, she was pretty and had this presence about her that was calming. However one look at her eyes and that calm made you realize the damage done.

I looked down in shame before saying 'Sorry' and 'I'll pay for everything'.

She smiled and said 'Just get better'. Here she is in the hospital with minor injuries caused by my utter stupidity and she's telling me to get better! Guilt crashed down and all I wanted to do was help her. Besides if I did then maybe, just maybe, I could have something besides this emptiness to focus on.

So I got a job, small little thing to pay her hospital bills. Dad arranged for the hospital to send us the ladies bill so that I could pay it off little by little. So my money from my little job went to two totally different places, her bill and my stash. I couldn't live without it by now, no matter how hard I tried.

Several months later I turned 17 and my habit was getting worse by the day. I don't know how I was managing it all, school…when I was there…work…which I made sure to be at even if I was high some of the time…and home where I just simply ate and showered before crashing into bed.

Seeing my behavior the Principal decided to take action and have me see a guidance counselor. At first I was struck with the 'crap' notion. Someone was going to stare me down with critical eyes that would judge my every move. However the lady that walked in was a startling surprise.

It was the same lady I'd hit and was still paying the bills of. I straightened up in fear, oh crap.

What if she gives me a hard time because of the accident? What if she's looking for revenge on her junkie hitter? I tried hard to not scramble as my eyes were looking for the nearest exit, which was either the only door beside us or the window in the office. I'm surprised I didn't garner a weird look.

I noticed that I was seconds away from acting out so I calmed myself down and tried to act poised.

"Usagi…" she said my name in a manner which spoke of remembering me; Can the world just swallow me up or is that too much to ask for right now? That is what I get for what I've done isn't it? I have to have HER as my counselor! I really must have fallen from the beaten path if it's come to this.

"Usagi I feel as though we got off to a bad start. My name is Setsuna and I'll be your guidance counselor for the duration." I was edgy since she seemed to be acting nice to me…was it a trick till she fires away for what I did? "You are probably wondering why I'm here." I nodded my head sheepishly.

"I saw your file come across my desk and made a decision. I want to help you Usagi." I couldn't believe how serious she sounded. Everyone here gave up on me over a year ago, despite the fact that I had improved since the accident…while not by extremes, it was progress.

"I know a way to get you off the narcotic you're on and help you graduate." Wait a minute she knew I was and is…still on it? How? She caught my questioning look. "I'm here to help because I remember that day very well and I want to help prevent you from doing it again." Okay…

"If you and your father agree I can help get you off the narcotic you're on and get you to a better state of mind and body." What did she want in return though? "What's in it for you?" I ask. She simply smiles. "I'm conducting a research test. You see, I'm also a Doctor and the field that I'm in allows me to go outside the box…so to speak. If you were to be my test subject I know you'd be off the heroin you're on."

It was the first time anyone pointedly said the word out loud…heroin… it sounded so bad and dirty… yet it held the source of my numbness from my pain for so long. "You know there are other ways of easing the pain of the loss of a loved one." Like I haven't heard that one before.

I agreed knowing that I needed to get off the crap I was on…I missed my little brother terribly and he was still in Kyoto with our Auntie. Dad came in the next day and we all talked about the program. He needed to sign off on it as I was still underage and to release me from school for a few weeks. The process was experimental but Setsuna claimed to have had success with it before. I asked her, 'Why not go to the Board with your results?' Apparently you have to have a certain amount of test subjects who have passed without lasting effects on their systems for the process to be approved of.

I felt like a freaking lab rat…but knowing that in the end I would have more to gain than to lose, I agreed to do it.

Being placed in a big sauna like box wasn't ideal, especially when I started to withdraw. It was incredibly painful, like needles sticking in your gut. It was like feeling your body try to crawl from the inside out.

For weeks I was like this...unable to have my fix and slowly realizing just how badly addicted I was. When nearly a month of time had passed, I was put in front of a needle with heroin in it. I didn't want to look at it, the knowledge of what it had made me do over time despite the numbness it gave me made me sick.

I didn't want to be like that anymore…I wanted to be better for not only myself but for my family as well. Hell, I have a little brother to look up to me. Once I got out of that thing Setsuna had a successful case to present, after a certain amount of time had passed. After all gotta make sure there's no long lasting effects.

During that time I felt my brain chemistry work a little bit better than it did before, it was as if my head hadn't been working fully before and now it was. Plus I spent a lot of time with Setsuna during the process and we ended up bonding. Soon even my Dad started to see the plus side of having her around.

One night when we came back to my house she ended up in a long conversation with Dad, and I could see the sparks flying between the two, although they were both trying to hide it from each other, perhaps too afraid of what might happen. So I subtly asked them both different things.

Just to spark interest and see if they were a good match, and after everything Dad went through with Mom he deserved to be able to move on. Many a nights after we got back to my house I would make up a last minute excuse about leaving the house to go to a friend for studying.

However with my car still being on the 'grounded list' I couldn't drive off so I simply forgot to leave keys at the house…by which I mean that I went into the kitchen, grabbed both sets of car keys and left only a set of the house keys before leaving. Somehow though they didn't see the opportunity presented to them.

After a few weeks I overheard her talking to another counselor asking about relationships between the student's parents and counselors. Once she was given the go ahead I decided one last shot at leaving them together. It had been a month into it when I left one night for an emergency at work.

Deciding to be lazy once finished with work, I choose to go straight home instead of trekking all the way to my friends place. Knowing it was late I was as quiet as possible, which was gracious of me when you heard the noises that were erupting from the living room. At first I mistook them for making out noises.

Hell I'd made plenty of them myself with old boyfriends, however when the moans got louder and more 'precise' I knew what I was overhearing. As fast as my feet would take me and as softly as my feet would take me I raced up stairs as fast as possible grateful that I had an MP3 player at my disposal.

I would have fallen asleep if it weren't for the noise. I had to jack up the volume to avoid hearing 'stuff'. I didn't need to know that my Dad was a stud in the bed room…and I didn't need to hear it either! After over an hour I noticed the shadows moving past my room and into his.

I took the ear buds out hoping that they would just sleep…thankfully someone was listening to my plea. The rest of the night was spent with a smile on everyone's face… for different reasons obviously. For the next few weeks I watched as they tried to keep it from me till one day as we were talking, I walked away.

"Usagi where are you going?" my father asked while setting his coffee down on the counter. Setsuna likewise wondered. Turning around I looked pointedly at him before saying, "I prefer not to be down here when you two 'Christen' the kitchen countertop." I've never seen two faces more red before.

Not even Santa's when Sammy and I were younger, they were almost glowing. They fumbled over words trying to deny it… very poorly I might add…Dad was trying to say something and Setsuna's face was just beet red and probably wondering if I'd hate her for it. Smiling I state, "You two are good for each other and I'm happy for you…" but there was a big but to all of this.

"However…please try to wait till I'm in my room or out of the house, hearing you two going at it like rabbits isn't my idea of a good time." I left the room leaving two very embarrassed people in there. I laughed at the image in my head already knowing that they were posturing the same embarrassed image.

Things moved quickly between them and once Setsuna moved in and got settled in to the house Shingo was able to come back home. Once back he seemed reluctant at first to accept someone new into our Dad's life let alone ours, but seeing Dad so happy quickly made him accept her and realize this was good for Dad. Plus it seemed to bring us even closer together as a family, something we hadn't had in a while.

Dad's sister was surprised by the age difference and asked him initially why someone so much younger his reply 'I love her…she's everything to me, she is the perfect woman and I'm grateful to have her. She's really helped me move on as I should have done years ago.' Seeing that Setsuna was a good person Auntie accepted her none-the-less. She knew that Dad needed to be able to move on.

Things were going great; I just barely graduated high school that year.

Once I turned 18 however things took a dramatic change from good to worse. Good was Dad and Setsuna getting engaged, Shingo going into another grade with flying colors, and I myself got promoted.

The worse was the first month after my promotion. I had just gotten home after a long shift at work. I had worked over 10 hours, only because someone didn't show up for the last four hour shift, and it had left me severely in need of food…and a shower before sleep would be allowed to claim me. But that wasn't going to happen. I walked into the house as per usual now and saw the wedding plans being made.

I smiled seeing the idea for the dress Setsuna had in mind for me to wear; Dad was complaining that it was too mature for a girl my age. I simply laughed at his reason especially considering all the things I've done in the past few years. Hearing the door bell the tiredness in my brain didn't remember the one thing Dad taught us about answering the door 'don't open the door to strangers'.

I did without thinking and the first thing I saw was a bat coming at my head. I was in a daze as I heard the shouts and screams and large foot steps of two men coming into our home. I looked up to see the front door slammed shut as one man grabbed my Dad yelling at him while the other took my little brother into the kitchen.

Seeing Setsuna cry out for them to leave my Dad alone I finally cleared up enough of the fog in my head to try and stand. Bad move…the man saw me and with a gun on my Dad walked over and dragged me bodily over to them. My brother was screaming out in pain. What kind of a sick man beats on a kid?

My head was throbbing too much for me to understand the words he was shouting, all I could do was watch as my Dad got beaten down and I got another hit to the head. I knew if I had one more it could be lights out for good. You know you never think something like this could ever happen.

Home invasions are a dime a dozen but they do happen and we were in the middle of one, scared as anything I begged him to not hurt my Dad…he was the only blood parent I had left. Don't get me wrong Setsuna was a great Mom but my Dad was blood…he was there for me from the start.

And just as I thought, one more hit to the head and… it was lights out. I woke up hours later handcuffed to a hospital bed. I didn't understand what was going on or why I was in cuffs. I called out for someone but other than seeing someone move their hand outside the door nothing happened.

Testing the cuffs I looked around and saw the room more clearly. I was the only resident and my head ached like hell. I wanted to get up and go see my family…were they okay? Please tell me they were still alive! I felt horrible about what could have possibly have happened and it was all my fault.

WHY the HELL did I have to open the front door? Before I can think any further two cops come through my door. Flipping open his notebook he reads out, "Usagi-" I want to know if my family's okay so I interrupt, "Sorry but where's my family? Are they okay?" he looks at me funny.

"After what you did you're asking that?" I admit I made a mistake but… "Just please tell me they're okay! Last I saw my Dad was getting his head smashed in by some guy. I swear I didn't mean to open the front door! I was just so tired I wasn't thinking straight." I broke down hoping they'd tell me where my family was.

He looked to me with little sympathy, "Usagi if would be in your best interest to just admit the truth here and tell us why you killed your family." I was stone cold in shock of what he said. Me kill my family? "Why would you think I'd kill the only people who ever loved me?"

How could they think that? "Your finger prints were found on the weapon and your DNA results came back to positive for heroin in your system. You were high when you did this no?" he nearly asked giving me copies of the shots taken from my house. I couldn't look at them…it was horrifying.

Like it came out of a bad horror movie. I started to cry and the cops merely looked away in disgust. "If you think pulling the crying act is going to save you its not. You're being booked for first degree murder of your father, brother and father's fiancé Setsuna. You have the right…" my mind went blank.

And I felt the bile rise out of my stomach. There was no stopping the outpour from my mouth. I had never seen grotesque imagery before and seeing this now, it's a total shock to my system. Some people scream out in horror and close their eyes, some look away in disgust others like me lose our stomachs.

I saw their eyes looking at me momentarily in confusion as if to ask 'are we sure' before reverting back to their 'she did it' looks. Of course I didn't do it! I loved them too much to hurt them. I could taste the bile finally subside and felt weakened by the loss of whatever food had been in my system.

However the taste of bile reminded me that what I saw was real and that I couldn't have seen otherwise. The tears came back tri-fold as I saw blurriness all around. I couldn't even move my hands to wipe my mouth I had my own vomit dripping down my chin. Well that is until a nurse came in.

Once she saw my state she grabbed a clean towel and wiped my face down despite the looks the cops were giving her. She looked to me in wonderment. It was almost as if her eyes read 'are they sure?' 'Please help me' I wanted to beg but my voice was caught on what they just accused me of.

They thought I killed my family…once he was done reading me my rights I asked, "What makes you think it was me?" he smirked in his reply, "The heroin in your system was substantial for loss of control, I'd recommend using the insanity plea." Like he expected me to just grab it.

Angered I replied back, "I love my family why would I do something so….even IF I was on it which I WASN'T!" safe to say he didn't believe me, nor did the others there with him. "You're being moved to a minimal security prison where you can't hurt anyone else again." he walked out just like that.

His partner…I guess…undid my cuffs only to 'help' me out of bed and with the nurses okay to leave the hospital, escorted me out of my room and through the back of it. "What make's you think it was me? I haven't had that crap in my system for several long months. I'm clean." I pleaded.

Coming up to the door I saw two men looking at me with a glint in their eyes…only they looked a tad bit familiar….oh my god! Recognition form that night hit me fast, "That's THEM! Those are the men who killed my FAMILY!" I screamed out trying to fight my way to them.

The cop just held on tighter while he called in for back up. The men simply smiled at seeing that I was the one going away in handcuffs and not them. Having secured me tighter the cop leaned in and right up against my ear said, "Your really going to blame two of Tokyo's finest son's for the murder of your family…that's low."

Shoving me none too gently in the direction of the cop car awaiting me I watched as their smiles grew brighter, I didn't care that cops were there I wanted revenge, "MARK my WORDS BOYS!" I yelled out catching them off guard a little bit…good it serves them right for what they've done.

"I'LL KILL YOU FOR KILLING MY FAMILY!" I screamed out at the top of my lungs. I heard it echo off into the night as if a banshee had just called out a death threat, and in truth I had. If I ever saw them again I'd kill them without a thought or any remorse or guilt.

The cop finally put me in the back of his squad car as the boys merely laughed. I hadn't had time to process everything until it hit me on everything that had just happened I was going to prison for killing my family. Everyone I love is dead and they're responsible for it and to make it worst it's not THEM going to prison but ME!

I knew I had to try to get out of here…my last ex didn't teach me some defensive stuff for nothing. Of course he mostly taught me just in case the dealers got a bit antsy with me in the area we were in. I was walked past a man in a suit fit for a lawyer which was what I had mistaken him for. He had white hair down to his neck.

Unusual for a lawyer but hey when you got money who cares. He looked to me with a glint of his own before I saw the hallway leading to the cell that would be mine. I made one last ditch attempt before I was in the cell. Smashing my elbows up into noses and smashing my feet into other feet I tried to make a break for it.

I got four feet before two tasers found their way to me. I was in too much pain to try and force my muscles to relax enough to work. I was tossed by them unceremoniously onto my cot and given a sedative to relax me by the 'nurse'. If you could call her 'straight, high pinned hair' a nurse that is. My head went into a tail spin and I passed out unable to fight off the effects of the drug.

Who knew how many hours later I woke up in a new bed, in a new room. The lawyer man was there and said he was here to give me an opportunity of a lifetime. "I can help you get even with your families murderers. They're very high up on the food chain in Tokyo which is why it'll be difficult to reach them."

Well connected murders…well what do you know, someone high up on the food chain whose buying their freedom…I thought sarcastically.

"Why not go after them yourselves? You obviously have some sort of power." I couldn't kill them even if I wanted to…my threat was empty cause the moment I tried, I'd probably die. "We can train you how. Call it a quid pro quo. You help us we'll help you." Sounds too good to be true.

And it probably is…

"What's the catch?" I ask.

He walks forward. "The catch is that you serve out a five year long contract with us. And when the boss feels you're ready he'll give you your family's murderers as targets…you'll get your revenge. You could call this your second chance at life." He remarked.

"Why me though? I'm not exactly an ideal candidate for this type of job." I said. Smiling he remarked, "You are actually very ideal for it." Looking up I show my confusion. "Usagi your past will help to define who you are and to learn from it. You'll be trained in what's needed to survive." I can get revenge…

"But be warned this is a pass or fail course you'll be in. You pass, you get to be able to serve your country for the greater good…you don't and it's…" I finish for him. "Let me guess, back to prison." He looks less than pleased, "No…as it stands Usagi Tsukino no longer lives." What?

My face must have shown my shock as he explained… "She died by lethal injection before a court decision could be made 15 hours ago. You Usagi are dead to the world and to your only living relative. Small price to pay for what you're about to do. Don't you think?" He replies handing me the execution papers ordered. I was dead…on paper, but still - I was dead…unbelievable.

I mutely agreed with what they asked of me and started giving it my best effort, my hardest in whatever training they put me through. For two long, hard years I trained with them. I showed them as much promise as possible so I could reach the right status and get revenge for my family.

Finally when it seemed that they were never going to promote me I got the call in to the office.

Diamond, the white haired lawyer, was already in there. He had been helping to train me, along with the resident psychologist Beryl and the big boss Seiya Kou. He was the only one there who ever really make me nervous. Diamond stood behind me for confidence but in the end it was mostly for himself.

I had figured out several months into my training that he'd developed feelings for me. I held no romantic interest in him. My sole focus was on revenge and doing what I needed to do to achieve in getting there…which meant be the best of the best…that also meant impressing him.

During the meeting I was rewarded for all of my hard work and promoted to an agent in the field. I thought for sure I would be doing the right thing…who knew how wrong I was, I was going to find out later. It was my first mission out in the open and I hadn't seen the outside world in just over two years.

I was happy just to smell fresh air again while being on that roof top. Having been trained as a sniper I had actually beat my own trainer's record on accuracy and length. I think it's safe to say he wasn't too happy about having a former female junkie beat his (and technically the company's) prime record at the place.

The first target was said to be a threat to the U.S. that we were partners with in some jurisdictions, I shot him with such accuracy that when he fell down to the ground his head looked like a crushed tomato. But then again, shooting a high powered weapon from over a half a mile away will do that to anybody.

It was interesting seeing what I had accomplished.

Next the target was a business man who had collected some illegal information and that was all I had been told. Any time I questioned what I was given Diamond would remind me of my reason here; however I was also questioning when they would give me the mission I was hoping for.

So one day I asked Mr. Kou or as everyone called him Kou, he was only 'Mr' if he was upset or in front of high society types. I had asked him as I always do before the start of any mission given to me 'The men?' he knew I was referencing my families' murderers; it was what I always called them.

But as always he responded with 'we don't have sufficient evidence or data that could be used against them. They're too far up the food chain for it to be a simple kill.' Seeing my defeated expression he stated 'Usagi you must understand, the targets we acquire that are threats to our country were put under the microscope carefully.'

I had got it but then he elaborated… 'Usagi, you must realize…' he had stood up and walked over to me in a reassuring gesture. 'Everyone we get sent out to target was put through a careful processing system so that we would be the last resort. These targets were given to us because their power protects them.'

That's who these men who killed my family were. 'The only reason the courts don't do anything is because they're either already bought out or there isn't enough evidence to convict them.' I knew his words to be true I just didn't want them to be. Nobody who's used to honesty wants that to be true.

I may have done many questionable things in the past but I knew what I was doing was immoral and wrong. I made those choices and I made the choice to get out, to be a different person, not only for myself but for my little brother as well. These people who were born to their power and privilege take full advantage.

If its one thing I hate is the privileged that can do something but don't care and are too lazy to do anything constructive to help others. Those that act this way make it hard for everyone else to see high society types as a nice people who have the same problems we all have.

There are very few high society types who actually care about others and go out of their way to ensure it. These people act as they want and their power and privilege protect them.

Kou's words were truth, that I knew but sometimes the truth is harder to absorb than lies and deceit you once knew. For me I knew the truth but the truth made it harder for me to reach my goal here. 'Once we send out the agents to collect the proper evidence needed for a target we can take care of it.'

Walking around he finished off, 'But only then otherwise 'innocent' people could end up in the crossfire. We don't want that, there are people out there that are innocent but are just related to in some way or another to these criminals that have no clue. We don't want them caught and hurt in the process. You see what I mean?'

He asks me. I knew he was right we couldn't afford innocent blood, but the way he said innocent had me curious…in the end I knew I would have my revenge for those I held dear to me…my justice would be served. Once my families murders were brought to justice if not today then some other day soon I could finally rest…till then…

Kou reassured me many times when I felt down, unable to keep going during different time frames. Like when different birthday dates hit I'd remember celebrations and it felt nice at first till I remembered that there would be no more. The other trainees didn't bother to make friends.

As far as they saw it everyone was competition and I was the last one they would have expected to be a good fighter, among other things. One of the others there that actually spoke to me was a timid girl named Ami. Sweet thing she was, but her nature didn't allow her to be in our group.

However due to her higher intelligence level she was placed in different training classes for a different agent program. We still maintained contact. Even the brainiacs were taught the basics on how to defend themselves. There were a few things that she lacked. Speed and agility but we got together during our spare time and I showed her.

It was what really bonded us as friends when no one else looked our way. Ami's reason for landing here had been due to her family. Her uncle worked here and though she refused to tell me who he was, he was a powerful person. That's the only other way to get in here.

Her uncle had apparently quote on quote told her 'You're wasting your youth and mental capacity when you could be fulfilling a greater purpose.' He's made arrangements to have her sent here so she could learn and develop 'character' as he put it. I liked her the way she was though.

She was sweet, and has this 'direct humor' I guess you could say. She'll tell you fact for fact but totally didn't get sarcasm till a few seconds later. But the one thing that being here has taught her is that she can learn much more and expand her horizons. Plus there are very interesting people here to meet and connect with. The one thing that made her unique to me was her short blue highlighted hair.

You couldn't tell in certain lights around the area which was probably a good thing cause I didn't see anyone around me ever with blue, pink and purple colors in their hair. That's probably not allowed too. Any more ridiculous rules and you'd think it was some sort of Catholic school.

Anyways…the place we were at had different programs that we were already placed in. I was in the field agent program where my training would involve hand to hand, weapons, and just enough computer knowledge to hack small companies, hers was on a whole other level. She trained in advanced computer technology.

Her intelligence level was to be trained to work within the facilities walls of their computer room. There was hardly ever a day when a rookie trainee got close enough to see inside that room. The place, from what I was able to figure out within a few weeks, had bullet proof glass windows. That too had me curious.

Anyways…The one thing I had to look forward to everyday after I trained was a picture of my family. I had used it in the past whenever I was near temptation. Even though I couldn't stand the thought of heroin anymore that doesn't mean you're immune to its effects.

So I'd look at it during those moments to help me out, to give me a reason to resist. It had been Setsuna's idea to begin with. I'm grateful for that. I still remember that day so very vividly. When we were all together, no work and no school, her, Dad, Shingo and myself, went to a photographer to have it made.

The picture was wrinkled with creases forming four slightly off squares, but all in all it was still something for me to treasure…well one of the very few things I had left to treasure. The only other item being a necklace my father bought me for staying clean. He bought me this beautiful little Celtic type of cross.

There really was nothing religious in it, but its coloring was mesmerizing. It seemed to have every color in it. The back of it had 'Daddy's little bunny' engraved on it. The chain was so delicate I couldn't wear it so often. When it was flipped over on its back you could barely tell it was there.

Probably the reason why I still have it on me, no one saw it. But I memorized it nightly before hiding it. I didn't want the people here knowing I had something from my old life here. They were strict on keeping your old life out so you could move on. I had different views on that.

In my opinion despite whether or not you were wronged or you did wrong, you don't ignore your past, you take what you can from it to learn from it. You use it as a lesson in life to know 'this is wrong', 'that is right' type of thing. I remember an old teacher once told me 'some lessons can't be taught, they must be lived to be understood'.

So I use my past experiences to grow as a person, to know what not to do and to hopefully prevent other people from going down similar paths. So I hide the good pieces of my past to remember them and to treasure what we had. So I hid my necklace and the photo from them.

'Sides it was the only thing on me when I was taken from the prison cell, the cops were too lazy to be completely thorough at the time. Every time I got back from a mission and before I went out to one I'd look at it to remind myself why I was doing it. My latest kill order had been another business man.

Only the placement was something I wasn't in to much of an agreement with. Not to mention he was with his family at the time. Placement had been on his yacht and when I had gone in to kill him his son had been right there.

I couldn't bring myself to pull the trigger and scar this child for life. So I took off into the dead of night. Only my trained-in reflexes kept me alive, for as soon as I took off his security detail tried and failed to kill me. I proceeded to work for Kou for the next six months, so now 3 and a half years had just passed by.

I was happy to be getting closer to the due date of killing my families' killers. But Kou made a long lasting assignment. Handing me the files one day I saw that the man was your average business agent. He had done some minor work in getting his family name out there.

Looking at the report I asked, "Long term assignment?" it would my first one to date, my others have been small time things that lasted only a few weeks maybe a month at the most. Some of them had me even playing the 'Mata hari' role in sex services. Those were the most degrading ones I had done.

I'd prefer to kill them and not sleep with them. This one was a long term assignment. It could last anywhere from six months to a year. "Usagi I feel that with this one you'll better and completely understand why we need the intel we need on certain people before we give the order to execute."

He was giving it to me so I'd understand what went on and…okay. Smiling I accepted it without hesitation and only asked, "Who am I this time? And what do I do?" it was standard to have a full back round ready to memorize just incase someone went all 20 questions on you.

Giving me my own file he told me to study it before I left out for my new location in two days. Going back to my room I looked at my stats of who I'd be playing and for how long a time. The two days given were there for one day to know yourself and the other to know your target.

I wonder if I'll have to give an accent on this one? Looking at my file I read my stats…and made my looks appear as they are now, only my hair was to be in a more 'fun- esque' type so that the person I was to get in with would feel more accepting of me into the family home. So right away I arranged my hair into my famed buns.

Two pigtails later I looked them up and down…I usually had my hair up in braids or one large bun to hide the excess hair I had. I refused to let them cut it, it was the only thing normal from my previous life…well the one I had lived with my family before this. Liking the look I read further.

Eyes were the same so no contacts needed, that was good. Don't get me wrong its fun at times to wear them and to have different colored eyes but they grow irritating after a while. The height would never really change; no accent needed; good. As good as I had become to pulling off different accents it was hard to nail the damned dialect and the right tone.

So far it was all easy I just needed to 'accidentally' meet my targets college bound daughter.

My background had been the other piece of my stats…I would be entering the daughter's university on a scholarship thanks to gymnastics? Did they even give scholarships for that? The first thing I did was try and think of what gymnasts do just incase she asked me to give her a demo.

All I could think of was flipping around a lot and the splits. So in my room I tried to the splits. That was no problem seeing as how we stretched out so much. I guess some of my sex related missions helped in that area to. I hated actually admitting to them being that useful, no matter what.

Splits had that down, just the flipping part to do. Oh god I couldn't do that…could I? Hopefully she wouldn't ask me to give an example on that part. Further into the made up past they gave me…parents…always they gave me deceased parents…I guess they thought it would be easier for me.

As they taught us at one point 'some of the best lies out there hold the most truth possible'. It was easier that way. cause once you say something that person your suppose to remain with mission wise remembers these little facts so if you say one thing and then later on make a comment it may differ from your original statement.

Plus it's easier to convince people with your tone, eyes, and facial features when you're not flat out lying to their faces. Some people can spot it in those different movements. So it was always best to stick close to the truth. Mine in this case was 'parent's and brother died during a shot out in a small time groceries store'.

Okay targets folder…average male in his mid 50's, three kids, married only once, lives with wife and youngest, the daughter, at their new ranch house. I mentally tried to picture a ranch styled house in Tokyo…wasn't coming up easy. But then again who's gonna see it with the big ass gates in the front?

Looking at a picture of the front there were gates blocking the main view of the house. I quirked my eye brows up to this…what do you have to hide Mr? In addition to his daughter Hotaru, the one I was too meet, he had two sons. Their pictures showed two nice young looking gentlemen.

The oldest had set up his own business and had a wife and son already. But since he already lived quite far away he was only able to visit on holidays or birthdays, which was good. The further they lived the better it would be to have less people there are to poke into who I was.

Plus it already stated that he was so busy making ends 'meet' that he worked a lot at his business. I guess this family actually works hard as hell for their money. They don't seem to be the 'I'm so wealthy I can do what I want' crap. Of course I haven't actually met them yet either.

However looking at the next picture I caught a look at the second son and initially he was the one who caught my eye, Mamoru. The picture had caught him with his…it that who I think…shoot…so it's his wife. The picture was taken with them walking about to different stores.

Figures…all the good looking ones are either married, gay or taken…or are priests. That one I learned the hard way one time…not a good memory. This son was more prone to spending summers with his parents since he was gone in Hollywood so much. Turns out he'd made a name for himself as well.

He had become a mediocre actor only ever getting small time roles, but hey apparently it was enough to catch his…I look into the file further…model slash actress slash gymnast slash oh…wife. Judging by her looks she was high maintenance, which probably meant he had gotten used to it as well.

No deal there either way…probably an asshole too…though really I was making myself think these things so I wouldn't be tempted by him. He was a stud muffin if I do say so myself. However if he ever did visit I'd have to limit my daily contact with him so my hormones wouldn't get the best of me.

It was hard enough to act pleased by a missions target for the industrial espionage stuff but to act un-affected by HIM would be hard. He would be the type for me to put my self awareness and whatever acting ability…no pun intended considering that is what he is…to the test.

Hopefully his wife would be there to unknowingly kill off any urge I had. Reading his profile deeper I read that he was a very loving family type of man. As he was wearing sunglasses in the photo I really couldn't decipher his expression through his eyes. I wonder if his wife felt the same way about family?

That was sweet though…made me think of my own family…I decided since there wasn't much else on him to make sure he wouldn't be the type to pop up and find it funny I'm around so much…it had nothing to do with anything else. I really didn't need too many outside disturbances on this mission.

Reading up on him I ended up locking in on an interview that he'd done before he and his wife were even dating. Though it would have been more preferable to find a more current article, I guess he wasn't in the spot light THAT much. According to the webpage he was a pretty private person. It was funny how the one he's with had more magazine shots and spreads than he did.

The article read had his preference in women…it had been similar to how I was…before this place that is. Casual and nice…sweet, but had to have brains, someone who stood up for herself. Sounds real romantic. Going back to the folder the people here believed his father was gathering up negative intel on some people.

However there was no proof…that was where I came in…get in with the family and you can gain access to anything…all I had to do was be convincing and conniving at each and every turn. Let's hope this doesn't last too long. Cause there was one question that was on my mind, what if they were innocent?

I had a gut feeling that I was going to be in for quite a ride, and let's just say that what was going to happen…well…things were about to explode…

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