Hello All,

Here's another one shot for your enjoyment! This is infinitely lighter than my normal stuff, figured I'd give you guys a break from my twisted side. Enjoy!

Cheers,

M. x

Harry Potter prided himself on being able to come home after a long shift at the Ministry and tell his girlfriend that his day had been absolutely normal. Incredibly dull!

He would smile and laugh and kiss her. He would thank Merlin that the drama of the Wizarding World had finally been put to rest.

Things were grand, delightful, relaxed and at peace.

And most definitely normal…

Which was why, when he awoke on the morning of December 1st to Ginny's ungodly snoring, and saw that the sky beyond the walls of Grimmauld place was ominous and stormy, he knew.

Something was brewing.

He dressed quickly. Planning on beating the day at it's own game and heading into work with solid resolve and determination.

Harry was not a superstitious man, but the Wizarding World had taught him to look for signs beyond his own control. Black clouds and rain could mean nothing, but it could also be that he was in for a rough day.

Considering what transpired lately in his department, he was almost prepared for the worst. Harry was slowly realizing the normalcy he craved was slipping away and being replaced by the chaotic unpredictability of two hotheaded, completely unmanageable Aurors.

They had driven him closer to madness than Voldemort ever possibly could.

At first, he had expected their behavior. They were natural enemies as far as the entire world was concerned. It didn't matter that the war was over. The two of them took every opportunity to undermine, rat out, prank and harass one another for the better part of a year.

Finally, Harry had been forced to suspend them from work for two weeks. He felt bad about that, seeing as one, of the infuriating party of two, was his best friend.

But he could not show preference. They were both responsible for the horrible and well-publicized battle that took place in the Atrium of the Ministry; a battle that concluded in several nasty jinxes, fire-catching hair gel—a new Weasley product—and an illegally imported Niffler.

After their momentous showdown, which consequentially made the Prophet and was the talk of the town for weeks, they seemed to have calmed down and thought better of their actions. When they returned to work, it was with biting silence and contempt for another six months.

Harry knew fighting words were still exchanged between them, though they did try to hide it behind his back as best they could. Which wasn't really their best at all. Everyone who worked or lived in a ten-mile radius had witnessed some of the more epic arguments between the two.

If it didn't drive Harry so insane, he would have been impressed with their ability to think up such awful schemes.

Both him and her being so stubborn made Harry want to claw his eyes out. Trying to work through a meeting with them was about as pleasurable as spending a decade with the Durselys. He was traumatized and more importantly, out of ideas.

So when he complained for the thousandth time to his darling love about his predicament, he hadn't expected her to laugh in his face and roll her eyes.

"They will sort it out. Come on, you can't tell me its not hilarious watching Hermione knock the arrogance out of Malfoy," Ginny raised her eyebrow skeptically, with an adorable smirk.

"It's not that, Gin. She's collectively knocked out at least half of his teeth in the past year and a half," Harry rubbed his face with agitation. "They've been a huge liability. I've threatened them, bribed them. Nothing works. The animosity is so deeply rooted that I might have to fire them both."

"Wouldn't that defeat the whole purpose? I mean, they were assigned together as part of the Diversify Magic Program and-"

"-I know, I know. It's just… it's killing me."

"Harry, you're being dramatic," she waved him off with an expression of annoyance. "You have to think like them. You know? Imagine how they are feeling. Personally, I think it's all bluster. You know Hermione wouldn't hurt a fly and Malfoy..." she paused, as a sinister smile graced her lips.

She was right, Hermione wouldn't hurt a fly, but she might murder a Malfoy. Harry raised his eyebrow in question

"Well," she continued slyly. "If you really want the dirt, I'd have a little chat with Zabini if I were you."

Harry's face darkened with instant dislike.

"Blaise, you mean?"

He couldn't help the disdain that seeped into his tone.

"Potter, you're jealous! Don't make it a thing, that was long before us."

"Mm."

She laughed gaily, hopping onto his lap and kissing him until he smiled.

"Talk to Zabini. Trust me, he's the only one who can crack Malfoy."

And that was what Harry did, consulted a "professional."

Zabini was as arrogant and as obnoxious as Harry remembered him. He took no small opportunity to bring up Ginny and inquire about her happiness while casually reminiscing about their brief "love affair."

If only they could have been 18 again in that moment, Harry would have blasted him off his antique chair.

But Blaise had come through. After some finagling and personal favors, Zabini took matters into his own hands. He arranged for Hermione and Draco to be tricked and then locked in the Room of Truths—hidden in the bowels of the Department of Mysteries.

Harry wasn't exactly sure what had happened in there, but after twelve hours, the two of them reemerged as very shaken and disturbed people. Due to Malfoy's catatonic stare and Hermione's bloodshot eyes, Harry insisted they take the rest of the week off. He heard not a peep from them until they presented themselves the following Monday, ready for work. And work they did.

That had been several months ago.

Since then, Draco and Hermione were both as professional as any boss could dream. Harry was shocked, then wary, then worried and finally once again dumbfounded.

Not one slur. Not one nasty comment, nothing.

Though he noticed that they refused to make eye contact with each other. Strange. Usually Malfoy was inches from Hermione's face, snarling at her about her lack of reflexes. And Hermione would seethe, standing on her tip toes, trying to murder Malfoy with her eyes, shredding through his insecurities and masculinity.

Yes it was awful, but also real. And somehow now, though they were calm and complacent, they were less tolerable than before.

If there was anything Harry Potter couldn't stand it was Dark Lords and tension.

It was obvious to him they were hiding something. Avoiding the truth. And what truth could that be?

Harry spent three weeks contemplating it and upon arriving home on Friday evening, just as he was sitting down to a lovely meal, Ginny opened her mouth and hit him with her theory like an insulted hippogriff on a murderous rampage.

They were in love. She assured him, with all the airs of a professional actress. A doomed love, like Romeo and Juliet, but a love all the same. And they were scared shitless. It was making them unhappy. Whatever they saw in that room—Harry had gone back to Zabini the next day and demanded to know what had happened in there, but Blaise said it depended on each individual— had finally forced feelings and maybe even respect, to the surface. Why else would they act like mindless idiots? She went on to say, fantasying with that dreamy look in her eyes. Why else would their walls be so high? They were unsure of how to be with one another now.

"It's the only explanation. What else could make them act like such utter fools?" Ginny finished lightly.

Harry grimaced in response. There was no answer to such a perfect question.

"So? What do you think?"

Her eyes were bright with the anticipation of a challenge.

"I think you're getting ahead of yourself, Casanova," he muttered, wanting to forever banish the image of Hermione and Malfoy together from his mind.

He only hoped that they would revert back to their loathing and name-calling instead of falling in love.

He might be sick if that wasn't the case.

Ginny leaned over the table, seductively removing his glasses. Her methods of distraction were endless.

"I'll bet you," she whispered with intent.

"You're on," he breathed back, reaching for her face.

And that was when the bet had begun.

Ginny was giddy with excitement about proving Harry wrong. It wasn't as if it were so rare an opportunity.

They made love several times that night. Before falling asleep, they continued to debate; arguing how Hermione could never love Malfoy vs. Why Malfoy was in love Hermione.

Funny how Harry had gone to bed feeling rather vexed, but when morning had dawned, all of that changed.

A week had gone by since and there had been no discovery, not one difference, nothing.

Though, now that he thought about it, the Auror office had been exceptionally odd with their excited whispers and fits of giggling. And Ginny had spent hours smirking at him like the cat that ate the canary every chance she got. She was also extra secretive.

Harry swore he had seen her wink at Zabini Wednesday morning in the Atrium's café.

Harry pulled himself from his thoughts just as he popped out of a fireplace and into that same Atrium.

He looked up instinctually.

The weather was dark and gloomy here as well. Apparently magical maintenance was on one of their strikes. Bodes ill, he thought to himself.

It was not even 7:30am, but Harry felt an urgency to get to his office and make sure things were…normal. He couldn't place his finger on it, but something definitely felt off.

Just before he reached the lifts on the far side of the hall, Pavarti Patil and Lavender Brown interrupted his musings.

"Harryyyyyy," they both hummed with an unearthly dissonance as they attempted to 'glide' towards him.

Harry immediately went on guard. It was just his luck to run into the most unforeseeable of duos. He was never sure when they would pop up, but it was usually during times of crisis—or if untapped gossip was going to break.

"Ladies, what are you doing back? I thought you were on a spiritual retreat in Tibet-"

"-We cut our work short," Lavender breathed, her large eyes examining Harry with interest as she ran her fingers down his arm and grasped at his hand.

"Yes," Pavarti chimed in, stepping much too close into his personal space. "We saw that we were needed here instead. There is going to be a shift, in power-"

"-In tides," Lavender chimed in.

Harry caught an overwhelming scent of what smelled like cat piss and Professor Trelawney— he gagged against his own will.

"The moon is in a phase of conflict and the fires of passion and rash decision making are upon us," Pavarti's eyes were like saucers.

"We saw, it would happen here. And you Harry, you would lose the battle."

Harry felt unnerved.

"Excuse me."

He shoved past them, heading for the lifts as if the hounds of Baskerville were upon him. It was much too early for prophecies and Harry vowed to lock himself in his office and get some work done before the chaos he sensed was coming, rained down upon him.

The silence was golden, but much too short.

For at exactly nine on the dot, his office door was blasted open and in stormed a witch filled with so much fury, her magic nearly knocked him off his chair.

Harry looked up in shock.

This was not the woman he knew. Yes, she was Hermione Granger—same crazy hair and brilliant brain— but her eyes were dark, molten pits of fury. She was shaking and her teeth were clenched together with catastrophic rage.

Harry rose from his desk instantly, concerned about her clearly, fragile mental state.

"Hermione, what-?"

She sliced the air with her hand, silencing him immediately.

"-He goes. Or I do," her voice was low with murder. "Me or him, Harry. Your pick."

Harry looked at her snarl and thought she might actually hurt him if he even breathed wrong.

"Just…tell me what happened," he tried calmly, offering her a chair.

She ignored his gesture.

"What happened? What happened was that disgusting ferret was ever born! I want him out of here now Harry, or so help me Merlin, I will remove him myself."

"Can we just take a step back?" he tried in vain.

"We most certainly cannot. Do you know what that idiot did?"

Harry looked at her closer. Underneath her anger, there seemed to be a profound worry brewing. She was trying very hard to block it out.

"Listen, Hermione…Whatever it is, I'm sure it can be worked out," Harry grasped at strings.

Malfoy accomplished a lot of mental torture on her ever since his arrival from Azkaban three years ago. He served his time and reemerged a new man. Harry vouched for him and in turn had him shoved into his department.

Malfoy was still an arrogant toad, but he definitely changed his tune where blood purity and human rights were concerned. However, taunting and driving Hermione insane were still on his list of favorite pastimes.

Harry thought back to the day Malfoy turned one of her heels into tortoise—she almost broke her neck when she got up to get a coffee.

And to the Christmas Ball last year when he jinxed the punch to throw itself onto Hermione's date every time he took a sip.

"Have you not heard about the bet?" she slammed her hands down on his desk, glaring at him with supreme authority.

"I-"

Harry felt his cheeks flame. Did Ginny rat him out? She wouldn't. Hermione would be just as furious with his firecracker— at least he hadn't bet against her. This must be something all together different.

"Malfoy sent interdepartmental memos to every office saying that he could, that he-" she stuttered, losing some of her fire which was replaced by intense embarrassment and defiance.

"What? That he could what?"

Harry breathed easy for a moment. She was unaware he was betting on her personal life as well.

"That he could make me fall in love with him. By December 1st."

Harry's eyes swung to his calendar.

It was indeed that day. He looked at the date only to feign innocence.

It was coincidentally the cut off for him and Ginny's bet. If Malfoy and Hermione revealed their feelings by the end of the evening, Harry would be taking Ginny on an all-inclusive trip to the Maldives.

"Despicable," he breathed with mock indignation.

His girlfriend seemed overly confident this morning, which only made his suspicions of her behavior grow.

"And what's worse, is more than half the Ministry has placed bets!" Hermione nearly screamed, stamping her foot with frustration.

"No!" he gasped with false bravado.

"Harry, you need to stop this immediately."

"I-" he faltered.

What did she want him to do? Spend his busy day running around the Ministry returning funds and righting rumors?

"I mean really, he's breaking about a million rules-"

Harry quirked an eyebrow, trying to fight a smile; Hermione and her rules— screw the law, but rules were rules.

"I don't think he is, actually," the light humor in his voice was unmistakable.

Hermione loomed ominously over his desk like a mad banshee.

"Are you serious? This is the limit Harry!" she raged, her face turning a violent shade of red.

"Okay, alright. I'll talk to him," he drew back from her aggressive stance, feeling slightly ashamed. Then a thought triggered in his head. "Look…I understand why are you so upset. But you're obviously going to win, so…"

Something in her eyes made his stomach clench, but whatever it was had disappeared just as quickly as it had come.

"It is the PRINCIPLE of the matter!" she shrieked.

Harry put his hands up in defense, watching her as if she was a cornered manticore.

"Of course. You're right. I'm sorry."

Hermione took a deep breath and nodded, seemingly back in control.

"See? Nothing to worry about," he began, but at that moment his own personal trickster walked through the door.

"You forgot your lunch, darling-" Ginny stopped short. Upon spotting Hermione she dropped Harry's food on the floor and embraced her friend. "Hermione! It's so good to see you!" she beamed, though Harry could detect a hint of mischief in her eye.

"I miss you too, Gin., " Hermione muttered, completely distracted.

She appeared to be suddenly miserable.

Ginny pulled back and looked at her.

"What's happened, why is your face so red?"

"Malfoy."

Hermione's expression darkened once more.

Ginny threw Harry a triumphant smile before fixing her face into an expression of solemn understanding.

"That awfully handsome, devilish snake? What's he done now?"

Hermione looked at her as if she had three heads.

"It's more like what my best friend won't do. Fire the sniveling prat."

Hermione tossed Harry a nasty glare before allowing Ginny to lead her from the office.

"That's just Harry being unhelpful. He doesn't understand women, they make him nervous," Harry rolled his eyes at her over acting. He was supremely helpful when need be. "Let's go shopping and have lunch in Muggle London and you can tell me all about it. If anyone can help you get back at an obnoxious man, it's me."

Harry closed his eyes as his office door shut and he prayed to the Universe that whatever Ginny was cooking up would not be explosive.

Harry had exactly two hours of reprieve until a sharp rap startled him. Before he could mutter come in, the door was thrown open unceremoniously and the towering, toned and handsome presence of Draco Malfoy entered like a King.

"Potter," he acknowledged with a snarky drawl and a slight frown, before taking a seat and placing his feet up on Harry's desk. "You summoned me?"

Harry did not have the energy to banter with the insipid snake—instead he cut right to the chase.

"Malfoy. Are you harassing Hermione again?"

His features smoothed into unconcerned, polite interest.

"Who? Sorry, name doesn't ring a bell."

Harry rolled his eyes in annoyance.

"Hermione Granger, Malfoy. What did you do to her?"

"Oh," his eyes lit up with a malicious enjoyment. "Granger. Why didn't you say?"

"She was in here this morning spitting fire."

Draco raised his eyebrows with interest.

"That's an image."

"Yes, one I'd like to soon forget. Listen. I thought things were getting better. That you two had learned to…avoid interaction unless necessary."

Malfoy stared at him stonily as if he had just asked him how one rode a broom.

"Now this bet-"

'It's a harmless joke, Potter. Don't get your knickers in a twist," he yawned extravagantly.

"It's not my knickers that are twisted, Malfoy! She is your partner, you cannot continue on with this erratic, unprofessional behavior."

Malfoy looked at him with indignant shock.

"What about her? Did you forget about when we met with that Muggle client and she had me wear a woman's robe bath!? That was humiliating!"

Harry smirked at the memory.

"Bath robe."

"Whatever," Malfoy snarled as he pulled his feet off the desk and sat up giving Harry his full attention. "And when she hexed my floo powder so anytime I would travel I'd end up in a gay sex shop! Huh? What about that?"

"Malfoy," Harry tried to hide his laughter. Hermione really did give better than she got. "We both know your history has been… rocky. And let's be honest, most of the abuse dealt out—Hermione was on the receiving end of it. So, can you for once, try to be the bigger person?"

"What did she say?"

The look in Malfoy's eyes darkened and something close to panic might have glimmered there, but only for a moment.

"She's horribly angry, and embarrassed."

"Good," he smirked.

"Malfoy, I'm ordering you to call off this ridiculous bet," Harry's temper was beginning to rise.

He thought Malfoy was past this petty behavior.

"Or what? Are you going to send me back to Azkaban?" he taunted, studying his nails with disinterest.

"Not at all, I'm going to transfer you to Paris," Harry shot back.

"What?" that sure got his attention. All arrogance and self assured smugness left his gaze immediately. He looked anxious, and unsure. "Everyone already knows about the bet. And I'm not even the one who started it!"

Harry didn't know whether to believe him or not. His eyes were leveled and clear, his sharp cheekbones rigidly contrasting against his twitching jaw.

Even if he didn't start it, he would have to be the one to end it.

"Concede. Say you couldn't get Hermione to be with you in a million years," Harry demanded.

Malfoy actually laughed out loud.

"You want me to lie?"

He looked aghast at the idea.

"I want you to stop being a prick! I'm serious Malfoy— this crosses the line. If you don't fix this, Hermione is leaving," he nearly shouted, throwing his hands up in frustration.

"She wouldn't. She's never quit anything in her life."

Malfoy's confidence in that statement sent Harry's eyebrows into his hairline.

"You're rather sure," he commented with suspicion.

"She wouldn't leave a job just because of me," he scoffed.

"That's not what she said this morning. She was pretty determined. I believe her exact words were 'he's a disgusting ferret who should have never been born and I want him out.' "

Harry knew he had gotten through to him as he watched the panic returned to Malfoy's eyes.

"Fuck."

They sat in silence.

Harry watched as Malfoy's brain worked a million miles a minute. Whatever he was contemplating seemed rather serious.

"Malfoy-"

"-I'm not the one who started it. And I can't call it off. I won't."

He stood up suddenly, looking down at Harry with entirely too much resolve.

"Why not!? It's not as if you actually want to date-" Harry stopped as he watched Malfoy turn away from his gaze and stare resolutely at the wall, his shoulders tense.

"What the hell are you up to Malfoy? This better be a joke, you better not be trying to-"

Malfoy turned with such fury in his eyes, that Harry was momentarily rendered speechless.

"-Stay out of it, Potter. You couldn't possibly understand what you are talking about," he hissed with a nasty snarl, before striding towards the outer office and slamming the door.

Harry let his head drop into his hands. He watched with confusion as the blonde stormed back to his cubicle where he paced for a few moments, then threw everything off his desk and stormed to the door and left.

Whatever he'd seen in that Room of Truths had done something to Draco Malfoy, or maybe it had been his best friend who had caused the Slytherin to lose his mind.

No matter where Harry went for the rest of the morning, all he heard about was the bet. Hermione was once again correct: it seemed as if most of the Ministry knew about it and had thrown down money on the outcome. It was currently in Hermione's favour, which was a small blessing. He would let her know as soon as she returned from lunch, that their colleagues had faith in her moral system and that the idea of her loving Malfoy was absolutely absurd.

Harry laughed to himself the whole way back to his department.

However the moment he reached the outer office, any sense of humor or resolution left him.

Everyone was peeping up from his or her cubicles, looking at him with an air of anticipation. Small whispers and giggles broke out over the office as Harry looked around in confusion. Just as he was about to open his mouth and ask what the hell was going on, Ginny came storming out of his office looking much like a Highlander, Warrior Princess ready to do battle.

"Harry James Potter!" she screeched. Harry jumped at the sound, as she came striding toward him, her wand drawn. "How DARE you!" she screamed, shoving him back and glaring at him with all the fury in the world.

He was wrought speechless, his heart dropping into the pit of his stomach as he looked around in wonder, trying to figure out what had set her off.

He noticed that Blaise Zabini was lounging against the door and several people from other departments were congregated around the room.

Pavarti and Lavender were perched in a corner watching him with rapt anticipation.

His eyes swung to Hermione. He could barely see her behind her desk, which was covered in chocolates and roses and every sort of gift a secret admirer, or stalker, might bestow upon a woman.

"You look at me when I'm talking to you!"

His eyes snapped back to Ginny's. Harry Potter was absolutely mortified.

"Ginny, what's going on?" he tried feebly, wishing more than anything that she would lower her voice and then her wand.

"I'll tell you what's going on, " she glowered with rising wrath. "You've been trying to get HERMIONE GRANGER to DATE you for the last three weeks! Did you think I wouldn't notice?" she wailed, pointing and waving her arms at Hermione's desk.

Harry couldn't help it.

He laughed.

Ginny reached up and slapped him silly across the face. Several people gasped, Blaise let out a whistle of appreciation.

"You can take your false promises and love and give it all to her, since it's clearly what you both want! She even confessed!"

Harry's eyes snapped to his best friend, who lowered her head so that she was conspicuously hiding behind a bouquet of flowers. All he could see was her frizzy hair and the slight shaking of her shoulders.

He turned back to Ginny. Her eyebrows were raised, her arms crossed and awaiting an explanation.

"Ginny," he began, but from behind him came a deep growl.

A vicious, cruel voice filled the silent air.

"Will you stop that bloody screaming?" Draco Malfoy hissed as he stalked into the office.

Apparently the commotion had roused him from the break room. His eyes immediately snapped to Hermione's desk, where she hid amongst her presents.

Harry watched the transformation as all aloofness and arrogance was sucker punched from Draco Malfoy.

"What's this, Granger?" his voice sounded strained, its building fury barely controlled.

Hermione ignored him as she reached into one of the chocolate boxes and pulled out a truffle. She stuck it in her mouth and continued reading the report she randomly picked up off of her desk.

Harry noticed it was upside down.

Malfoy stalked across the room; people automatically moved out of the way, wanting to avoid his nasty temper. He stopped behind Hermione, his palms coming down on either side of her with a thwack, effectively trapping her in.

"I asked you a question," he hissed, his lips grazing against her ear.

Harry watched as she shivered, but still refused to acknowledge his presence. He leaned further in, his chest pressing against her back as he reached out and plucked a note off a bag that was clearly filled with lingerie. He read it over quickly, his eyes darkening with jealousy as he crumpled the note in his shaking hand.

Hermione closed her eyes and Harry noticed a small smile playing about her lips.

Harry's gaze narrowed and he turned to his forgotten girlfriend, who was watching the scene unfold with a vicious sort of enjoyment. Very subtly, without taking her eyes from the confrontation, she threw a thumbs up to Zabini, who nodded back with a smirk.

Harry opened his mouth to demand that she explain but in that moment, Draco Malfoy's arms shot out, swiping Hermione's desk clean as flowers and chocolates and jewelry went flying everywhere and smashed all over the floor. He swore loudly and kicked her desk, before turning his furious gaze to Harry Potter.

Harry knew that look of pure loathing and he could only imagine what was coming.

But Malfoy surprised him.

Draco threw Hermione a nasty sneer, which died on his lips the moment he saw her eyes. She stared back as if to say, you did this.

He walked swiftly to the door and turned to look back at the shocked office. Malfoy's eyes locked with Harry's once more— Harry could feel the envy and anger burning into his soul.

"The bet is off," he snapped.

Hermione gasped as Harry watched Draco with dawning horror— no, it couldn't be.

He couldn't actually be upset and think that-

But he was already gone.

The door slammed with a resounding crash and everyone immediately broke out into whispers and groans.

Hermione quickly jumped up from her seat and fled as well, barely glancing at Harry as she rushed past. He didn't have to see the guilt in her eyes to know it was there.

He turned to the maniac at his side.

"What the bloody hell was that?" he asked, half angry and partly astonished.

Ginny looked up at him in mild surprise.

"Just Part One of Operation Take Down Malfoy," she leaned up and kissed him soundly. "Wasn't it wonderful, dear? We'll make an actor of you yet! Let's up the stakes shall we? I'd like to extend our holiday with a trip to Pompeii. You know it's got the oldest magical brothel in the world, right?"

She wiggled her eyebrows suggestively then turned back to address Harry's staff, completely dismissing him.

"Alright, people! Don't get upset, the bet is still on. Malfoy didn't start it, so he has no authority to conclude it. Would anyone like to make another wager or up the stakes before the deadline? Yes?"

Several people began hollering at once, calling Ginny over as Harry stood in shock watching his witch collect galleon after galleon. She kept turning and jingling the moneybag at him in taunt. What was supposed to be a friendly bet between the two of them, in the privacy of their own home, had turned into a full out war at the Ministry.

What was she thinking?

Harry was impressed and furious all at once.

He spent the next hour walking around, listening in on the conversations of half the Ministry, who were now converged in his department. It was complicated, there seemed to be several hundred bets happening within the bet: how would it happen, who would crack first, what would the circumstances be?

Why had Ginny done this? Was she seriously that determined to win?

Every few minutes Harry made eye contact with someone who was either throwing him pitying looks or laughing at him.

Maybe Pavarti and Lavender had been right. He was going to lose this battle.

Were Malfoy and Hermione really-? He stopped himself. It was too weird to picture, they hated each other, how was it even possible?

Harry finally snuck away from the chaos and returned to his desk. He locked the door for double measure.

He couldn't believe the lengths that Ginny would go to, and more insanely that Hermione had gone along with it. It was unclear of who wanted what anymore, and Harry needed to remove himself from the situation lest he lose the small amounts of logic he still possessed.

It didn't take very long before he was once more bombarded around two in the afternoon with a soft knock on his door.

"What now?" he called in a rather strained tone.

"It's me."

He huffed to himself as the intruder unlocked his door and Hermione shuffled in timidly. He looked at her long and hard before returning to the paperwork in front of him.

"Are you terribly angry with me?" she tried in a soft voice, taking a few steps closer.

Harry sighed, throwing his quill down with resigned agitation.

"No, Hermione, though I am curious why you chose to go along with such a ridiculous scheme, especially during work hours," she raised her eyebrow at him. "Okay, during work hours only," he amended.

She smiled.

"It was Ginny's idea," she stated simply.

"Of course it was," Harry muttered under his breath. "Why was it necessary?"

"She thought it would be the best way to get back at Malfoy."

"By dragging my name through the mud? By making me look like a complete tosser?" he huffed, rather stung with her blunt response.

"Everyone was in on it. No one thinks you would actually leave Ginny, except Malfoy apparently," she sniggered.

"Yes, and he looked ready to bash my face in, would you have liked that?"

Her mood sobered instantly.

"Of course not, I didn't know how he was going to react— Ginny didn't even tell me the exact plan, just that it would infuriate him. And get him to call off the bet. Which he did, she looked smug again.

"I've never seen him so flipping mad," Harry said more to himself.

"Because we ruined his plan, his stupid bet to make me look like some silly, obsessed, school girl," her voice hardened once more.

"It wasn't even his bet!" Harry yelled, not bringing attention to the fact that his deranged lover had been the one to start it all. He looked Hermione straight in the eyes. She still had bits of flower stuck in her hair from Malfoy's savage destruction of her desk. Harry's temper rose as he realized Ginny had probably spent hundreds on the stupid prank. "All of this, Hermione, for Malfoy? What's going on, seriously? What happened in The Room of Truths?"

Her gaze slipped down to her lap and she took a deep breath.

"You should have helped me when I asked you this morning, Harry. It's too late now, it's out of my hands."

"And into Ginny's?" he asked nervously. "Please, whatever you are planning-"

But apparently Hermione was done with the conversation, for she stood up and smiled, heading back out to her cubicle.

"-Sorry."

He could hear the smirk in her voice before she let the door shut quietly.

Harry brooded in his office for the rest of the afternoon, making calls to Unspeakables and checking book after book for any information on the Room of Truths and what might happen to any individual or pair who went in.

Nothing was clear except for the fact that entering the room had life changing consequences and could strip anyone who entered of their preconceived notions.

Side Effects were empathy, sometimes depression and often shock. But other than that, he had not a clue of what had been done.

Though both Malfoy and Hermione seemed to return to 'almost' normal after their adventure, there was something fundamental that shifted between them. Harry was dying to figure it out.

When he could no longer take the silence of his office, he cautiously peaked his head into the main room.

"Ginny?" he questioned. Forgetting about his stealthy behavior, he crossed the room quickly to where she was leaning against the water cooler with Zabini. "What are you still doing here?" he asked nastily, shooting daggers at Blaise who seemed supremely unconcerned.

"Shhhh!" she swatted him away. "You're going to blow my cover," she whispered, jerking her head towards Malfoy's empty desk. "He should be back any moment."

She leaned over Blaise's shoulder and Harry followed her sight line to a map of the Ministry that clearly showed Malfoy heading back to the office.

"Where did you-?" he started, clearly in wonder. But Ginny was shoving him towards Hermione's desk.

"Fred and George aren't the only ones with special maps. Go, go, go! And be believable," she emphasized, showing off her straight teeth.

Harry rolled his eyes in annoyance and turned back to his office just as Malfoy came storming into the room. He shot an icy glare at Harry, one that Ginny copied almost verbatim, and then tried furiously not to look at Hermione.

He was unsuccessful.

Harry watched as his jaw twitched and his fists clenched and unclenched. He was rooted to the spot, unable to look away from her. She raised her eyes, giving him a cool stare. With a professional snarl he turned on his expensive leather boots and violently sought his desk. He dropped down behind the wall, silent, though his rage sent a whiplash of intense energy spiraling through the room.

With a defeated sigh, Harry returned to his solitude.

Not minutes later, Hermione appeared at the door. She knocked softly against the open frame.

Harry looked up in shock, was she wearing…lipstick? He almost spit out his tea.

"Hey," she purred.

Harry felt his cheeks flame— never had she used such a low and sexy voice before. He shook his head, remembering that this was his best friend. Someone—Evil Red, as he sometimes referred to his witch— had frantically tried to muse up her hair and unbutton her blouse one button too low. Harry was having difficultly maintaining eye contact.

She started to swagger into the room and tripped on much too high of heels that were clearly a size up from her own—Weasley strikes again. Harry caught her before she hit the floor. She looked up at him with defiant embarrassment and he laughed warmly.

He didn't have the heart to tell her there was bright pink lipstick all over her teeth.

"How can I help you, Hermione?" he asked, still chuckling at her abysmally daft seduction skills.

She righted herself almost immediately.

"I, um, came to check and see if there was…" she turned her head to the side. Through the open door, Harry could see Malfoy pacing back and forth, looking desperately frazzled. He was clearly concentrating on hearing every word of their conversation. Hermione's expression was one she wore right before a big exam, and Harry recognized her determination immediately. "Anything I could help you with…on a more, personal level," she let her voice ring loud as she laid her hands on his shoulders, rubbing them lightly. Harry could see a blush lifting onto her cheeks. Good, at least she was as uncomfortable as she was making him. She cleared her throat, a look of challenge in her eyes. "Maybe a nice…massage?"

Before Harry could respond with a witty remark that he was sure would end this indecent scheming, there was a much louder rap of irritation upon his door.

He looked up.

In that moment, Draco Malfoy resembled a mad man. He clearly ran his hands through his hair over hundred times—it was sticking up all over the place, and his eyes were cold and harder than chips of ice. He was breathing heavily, looking as if it were taking every ounce of his self-control not to snap.

"Potter," he snarled with vindictive spite as he slammed the door shut and Harry heard it lock as Malfoy hit it with a silencing spell. "May I have a word?"

Hermione took her sweet time removing her hands from Harry's toned arms. She sauntered forward to lean against his desk and she turned to face the two wizards. She folded one arm over the other, accidentally pushing up her— Harry was wont to notice—much too lovely of breasts and fixing the wizards with a cocky glare.

Malfoy looked her up in down, shook his head several times and slammed his hands into his pockets as if it would be the only way he could stop himself from strangling her. Then he forced his gaze back to Harry's.

"You were right, about what you said this morning," Malfoy muttered, forcing himself to stay professional when Harry was sure he wanted nothing more than to rip his face off. "I…can't do this anymore," his eyes snapped to Hermione's, and there Harry saw something that made him realize he would be packing for the Maldives sooner than he had expected. "I'd like to accept your transfer to Paris," he concluded, rubbing his hand vigorously across his neck and jawbone.

Harry looked at him in shock; Malfoy was running away? He opened his mouth to reply but the witch beat him to it.

"What?" she breathed, as if her world just dropped away from her.

Harry could hardly believe it but she looked disturbed, and could it be…sad?

"You heard me, Granger. You win," he taunted, throwing her a look of disgust.

"I win? I win, what?" she hissed, righting herself into a defensive position.

Harry had to give her credit— she only teetered slightly as she took a step forward.

"You want me gone. I get it. I see that now," he spat.

"I want you to stop acting like a complete idiot, Malfoy! That's what I want," she railed, throwing her hands up and laughing in disbelief.

"I did!" he roared.

"No you did not!" she shot back.

"Clearly everything you thought was a lie. I should have known you would stab me in the back like this!"

Malfoy's voice broke as he jabbed a finger in Harry's direction.

"Like you did by starting this ridiculous bet?!" Hermione raged, stepping even closer.

"I didn't start it!" he bellowed down at her, grabbing her by the shoulders.

"Then who did!?"

She shoved away from him, but he advanced even closer. They were nose to nose now.

"I don't bloody know!"

Harry swore their lips met for the briefest of seconds as Draco annunciated every syllable in his most forceful tone.

"Well isn't that convenient!" her upper lip curled back with a snarl as her sarcasm bled through his ears.

"Stop," Harry had enough. "It wasn't Malfoy, Hermione," he took a deep breath and looked up. Ginny was trying to peak through the glass window, her eyes silently pleading with him to not throw her under the bus. Harry used his wand to drop the curtains immediately. He took a deep breath. "It was me, I started the bet."

There was a moment of complete silence and then they both started screaming at him. He only caught bits and pieces but it was enough to make his head want to explode.

"What is your problem Potter?"

"How could you do that to me, Harry?"

"What was this some sick joke?"

"How dare you gamble my personal life!"

"Enough!" he bellowed. They both fell silent, glaring at him murderously. Harry happened to notice they were now standing side by side, united against him. He almost smiled. "Look, I wasn't the only one involved, clearly. It wasn't supposed to get this out of hand. Hermione, I'm sorry."

"What about Malfoy, aren't you going to apologize to him?" Hermione spat, fury evident in her eyes.

Malfoy was smirking.

Harry felt his brain being whiplashed by their sudden change of tactics.

"I'm sorry, Malfoy," he muttered.

"You know Potter, I think you should make it up to me."

Malfoy nudged Hermione in the side, throwing her a sly wink.

"Of course you do," Harry groaned, his eyes rose to the ceiling.

"I'd like a raise," he continued with supreme snobbery.

"Don't start Malfoy," Harry warned.

"And a new office, a private space, for my partner and I."

Harry looked at the two in confusion.

"I'd like an extra week of holiday," Hermione chimed in.

Her and Malfoy shared a small smirk that had Harry's brow furrowing even further.

"Yes, Potter," Malfoy drawled, his eyes not leaving Hermione's. "I'd like the same week, if you will."

Harry stared at them with an odd expression, unable to speak as he watched them gaze at one another with an intensity that unnerved him.

"And Harry, if you don't mind, please stay out of our personal business unless you're ready to lose another battle. You do know who you're dealing with, don't you?" Hermione smiled sweetly before kicking off Ginny's heels, waving her wand and exiting the office without another glance behind her.

Malfoy turned back to Harry, genuine amusement twinkling in his eyes.

"For a moment there you had me, Potter."

"What?" Harry's brain was short-circuiting, he was sure.

"As if Granger would ever want you when I'm around."

He was now fixing his hair in the back of Harry's teaspoon with an arrogant grin plastered across his perfect face.

"Malfoy, please-" Harry rolled his eyes in irritation.

"Though I am going to have a chat with that redheaded she-devil you plan to spawn with. Weasley is dangerous."

"Don't have to tell me," Ginny was proving to be quite the handful. Draco smirked at his discomfort. "So about Paris," Harry hedged after a few moments of silence.

"I think my intentions are to stay here. Pretty clear, Potter, don't you think?"

Harry couldn't think of anything else to say.

"So, we're good?" he tried.

Malfoy looked at him with an impressive amount of disdain.

"Until I can think of a suitable way to return the favor."

Harry sighed heavily. Ginny's pranks were going to get him killed one of these days.

"Take the holiday, it's the least I can do," Harry offered.

"How agreeable of you. In the meantime and with the upmost respect, Potter— keep your hands off of Hermione or I'll remove them for you."

He smiled politely before taking his leave as well.

Harry returned to his desk bemused as ever. He wasn't sure what had transpired in the last ten minutes, but his head was spinning and he was more than ready to pack up early and head home.

Just as he was making his departure, Ginny came dancing into the room.

"You can't leave yet! It's almost time, Hermione just gave me the thumbs up!"

He looked to the clock, it was already seven in the evening and the office was almost entirely empty.

"It's over Ginny," he frowned at her and she ignored him.

"I told everyone I would send a message as soon as it happened," she grinned at him and Harry felt his heart warm despite his irritation.

"So you still think you're right," he mused.

"Of course I'm right. You wouldn't love me if I was wrong all the time."

"Ginny-"

She cut him off, ducking behind the desk and hitting the lights with his wand.

"-Look! Look! He's going over to her desk!" she crawled across the office floor like a spy. Harry watched her with amusement. "They're talking, good, good…." Harry let his eyes fall on the pair of Aurors. Draco was speaking in a low voice. Hermione's eyes were downcast. He fell silent and waited, until she shook her head no. His shoulders visibly fell and he turned and left. "What!" Ginny's hiss came from somewhere near his feet. "No, no, no, no! What is going on? She said she-ughhhhh that chicken shit!" Ginny dramatically slammed her fists into the floor a few times, while Hermione packed up her things and left quickly after.

"Guess you lost, Gin," Harry smiled lazily, his Gringotts vault was safe for the time being.

"Dammit!" she yelled, before getting to her feet and giving him a sulky pout.

"You know this means you'll be my personal chef for the next month, right? And I specifically remember you saying to 'raise the stakes' this afternoon, so I did. You'll be cooking…naked."

Ginny clamped her teeth together with a furious glare. She left his office with a snarky reply about using his testicles as an appetizer, as Harry's laughter followed her out.

Ha! And Pavarti and Lavender had been so sure that it was he who would lose this battle! And even if the two of them were in love, they clearly didn't confess it by the evening of December 1st. All that mattered was they had teamed up against him and it seemed to create some sort of truce. He won either way, things could return to normal now.

Harry grinned, figuring he'd treat himself to a celebratory firewhiskey before heading home to his naked wife wielding a kitchen knife. His grin widened at the image.

Twenty minutes later upon reaching the lifts, a grumpy old wizard from magical maintenance informed him that there was a locking spell placed on them and he would have to take the stairs to the Atrium.

Harry frowned in disbelief, a locking spell?

How strange.

Just as he hustled down the last fifty steps and exited into the hall, the doors of lift number seven chimed open.

There stood Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy wrapped around one another as if nothing else in the world existed— they were attacking each other's lips with fervor, both fighting for dominance. There was bright pink lipstick all over the side of his face and her hair looked as if she had stuck a fork in an electrical socket.

Harry paused to observe their insane behavior—not sure if he should run for it, or take a picture for Ginny to see. No, he would keep this from her. Let her figure it out ages after he already had.

The couple went on, blissfully unaware of him. They continued to kiss and caress each other with abandon. Hermione kept trying to put her clothes back on, while Malfoy simultaneously peeled them off.

Only when the lift began to chastise them for inappropriate work behavior, did Hermione pull herself away and forcefully remove Malfoy's hands from her rump.

"You're going to get us caught," she murmured, trying to shrug back into her sweater.

He reached for her once more, running his hands down her sides as she moved to walk away. Harry hid himself in the corner as she hurried past. Malfoy took a second to collect himself before jogging to catch up with her.

"Would that be the worst thing in the world, Granger?"

"No, but then you win the bet! I told you Harry didn't suspect. He's so oblivious!"

Harry stopped himself from gasping.

"There's still time," Malfoy smirked, rushing at her once more to sweep her up in his arms.

"Put me down you impossible snob!" she sounded anything but angry.

"Ask nicely, love," he purred, running his mouth down the side of her neck.

"Never."

And then they were kissing again.

Harry groaned—he was trapped and could either listen to their sexual banter or expose himself, making Malfoy the winner of whatever alternative bet was happening between the secret lovers.

"I won fair and square. You know what that means," she smiled seductively, pulling him roughly by his tie. "You're my library slave for the next month."

Harry would have given anything at that moment to not have ears. What the hell was a library slave?

"I disagree. We both won, Potter knows now for sure, seeing as I threatened him."

"Draco!" she admonished, half-heartedly.

"Now, where to go on Holiday?"

That sneaky bastard, Harry thought with building humor. The two were grinning at each other now, thick as thieves.

"Ginny said the Maldives are wonderful this time of year," Hermione mused, landing back on her feet as he took her hand and they headed toward the fireplaces.

"Crawling with tourists no doubt. Uncivilized. Granger, we might try to go somewhere with a little culture. You keep forgetting you're with a refined, sophisticated man, now."

"Yes, very. It was your sophistication that made me fall in love with you. For example, this morning when you tripped over Crookshanks on your way to the loo and landed on your arse, or when you accidentally wore my running shorts as panties last week."

The mirth in her voice was contagious.

"Yes, because you're always so presentable. You know you've got lipstick all over your teeth," he teased with a softness Harry had not heard from him before.

"We'll then that means you've got lipstick all over your co-"

Harry bowed his head in complete horror just as Malfoy slapped his hand over her mouth.

"-Such a naughty girl," he murmured.

Harry gagged for the second time that day as Hermione shot back a snarky comment.

They sauntered off hand in hand, bickering and laughing, as Harry swore under his breath. Ginny was going to be impossible when she found out….or did she already know? That woman was going to be the death of him. And he would gladly oblige.

It had been a sincerely peculiar day for Harry Potter, and if Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy had become the norm, he was positive life was about take a dive back into madness. Though madness seemed less irritating if Hermione was happy, and judging by the last ten minutes, Harry knew that to be true.

Well, he could pat himself on the back for a job well done. He had been the one to suggest they work together, after all. He would have to remind Ginny of that before news broke and the word went rampant.

The smile gathering on his face suddenly fell— did that mean he'd have to be the unfortunate soul to tell Ron? No, no he'd make Ginny do the dirty work. In fact, he'd bet her a new Quidditch Pitch she wouldn't have the guts to do it.

Who was he kidding?

When it came to Ginny, all bets were on.

UPDATE: Was thinking of doing an additional chapter about what took place in The Room of Truths, what do you guys think?