Leo is on his way to their sleeping quarters when he hears her sigh, and he stops just before the entry to the Holodeck, looking in. He watches in silence as April droops to the floor, pulling her knees up close to her, as she plays with her shard of the Soul Star between her fingers. It's the fifth time this week he's caught her doing so.
He decides to go in, and ask her what's wrong.
She doesn't say or do anything until he slides himself down to the floor next to her. Finally, she looks over at him, with a small smile.
He knows right away she's faking it. He's used that same smile many a time before, usually when talking to his brothers after using the Holodeck to speak to…Master Splinter.
Maybe he should go, he understands that privacy is a huge deal on the Holodeck. But he refuses to leave her alone there, sad.
"Is everything ok?" He probes gently, placing a hand on her knee. Her eyes return to the Soul Star.
"Yeah…just, thinking."
"Mind if I ask…about what?" He continues. She sighs, looking up at him. Her eyes glisten; he thinks maybe she is about to cry. He shifts himself a bit closer to her, in an attempt to console her.
"Do you believe in Heaven, Leo?"
He thinks a second.
"I don't know, did you ever believe in giant mutant ninja turtles?" He laughs. She 'smiles' again; he knows this wasn't the answer she was looking for.
"I'm serious Leo," She pauses. Then she leans her head on his shoulder. "Do you think, maybe, that Splinter…my dad, even Karai, that all of them are somewhere at peace. We're in the past,"
He nods.
"But what if in the future they can look back at us, like Renet, and watch us trying so desperately to save them? Or what if, they're all in Heaven, wondering what happened to us?" He could hear the other question in her voice.
She shakes her head.
"I make no sense."
"No, April, you make perfect sense. We were taught the Shinto beliefs, since we were little. We believe that all beings have a spirit, and that that spirit lives forever, regardless of the loss of body." She smiles lightly, for real this time.
"But we were never restricted to Shintoism. Splinter allowed us freedom to believe in who and whatever we wanted. When I was four or five, I think…I think that was when I decided I believed in a Heaven. Mikey was in my room in the Lair, because he was afraid of the sounds we had heard from topside. It was our first thunderstorm that we consciously understood. He thought the entire Lair would fall over our heads." He smiles at the memory, of holding his littlest brother there. The smile widens, as he remembers April there, almost in his arms, her warmth against him.
"And I told him that if it did, we would meet each other again in the Dojo. With Master Splinter, Donnie and Raph. I didn't realize I had made up Heaven, but that's what I had told him. We would be ok, in Heaven, together."
"That's so sweet Leo." He looked up at the clean, white ceiling, as he felt April place her small hand over his.
His cheeks heat up. This was solely friendly, right?
"I think they're in Heaven. Your dad and mine. I think they're wondering why we would ever try to save Earth, when they're happy now. He's with Miwa and Tang Shen and they're a family again…"
"And my dad is with my mom, and my pet goldfish from fifth grade." She giggles to herself. She glances down momentarily at her hand over his. She hadn't realized she had done that. With her free hand, she swipes away a loose strand of hair.
"They're ok April," He smiles.
She lays the Soul Star down against her chest again.
"Thanks Leo,"
"…You should get some sleep," She says slowly, sitting up straight again. He lets his hand drop.
"Are you sure you're ok?" He asks. April nods.
"Ok, goodnight April." Leo shuts his eyes, laying his head back against the wall.
April watches for a moment. "Uh, Leo?"
He turns his head to her voice, his eyes still closed.
"You're not going to sleep with your brothers and Casey?"
He shakes his head, opening his eyes again.
"I'm not going to leave you alone, April. If you need me I'm right here." He pauses. "And if you need them, they're right here." He motions to her pendant, the Soul Star jingling only slightly.
She grins, leaning back on his shoulder.
Ten minutes pass.
"I think I love you, Leo…" The words slip, as she dozes off.
