I see Katniss head over to the bag marked 12. It's a very small backpack, and I wonder what's in it. But it's not the dead's job to be curious, so I push all thoughts of it out of my mind. "The dead's job." Because after all, isn't that what I am? I knew when I volunteered for my sister that I'd never win. I couldn't live without Cato anyway. I know what you're thinking, "But you wouldn't have to with the new rule, two district partners can win," but you're wrong. All of us know that the Gamemakers would never go though with that, and when they suddenly make the two last victors turn on each other, the Capitol will go crazy with the invigorating turn of events. The Games will be just that much more entertaining this year. It's sick. But a lot of us in District 2 don't care; the Capitol treats us "well". Ha. As if there aren't still nights when my sister and I go hungry, when I can't find any money. My mother and father passed away, leaving my younger sister and me with no relatives and nowhere to go. I was fourteen. Before I found Cato... well... I sold my body, because there was nothing else to sell. But then Cato came along, and he made me stop. He promised to help take care of us, so I let him. Not for my sake, but for my sister's. Right now, she's under the protection of a friend, Jeneva. I had to go with the person I trusted the most, because my sister will spend the rest of her life under that person's protection. Needless to say, I never planned on returning. Anyway, I shake my head and head out into the open field. I throw a knife to Katniss's right, aiming to miss. Come on, Katniss, I think. She deflects it with her bow and I have to hide a small smile. Then she shoots an arrow at me, aiming for my heart. I twist out of the way, but not far enough so that it won't hit my shoulder. Now people will understand if I'm slowed down a little. I breathe heavily, pulling the arrow out. It's stings a lot, but it's mostly superficial. Katniss grabs the backpack now, and I throw a knife at her forehead. It will just skim across, a benign gash, but enough to blind her from killing me just now. I have to do all of this just to keep up with the act. I hate it, but now the Capitol will not see me as a threat to them, just another tribute who is very into their Games. I have to guarantee that they won't hurt my sister. There is no other way. If I were to let Katniss get her things without a scratch, it could be considered an act of rebellion, a message to the Capitol that I don't care about the district differences, and that I think the Games are wrong, and that I want to help another tribute win. The President and Gamemakers pick up on these things so well, you have to be extra careful. I played it pretty close to the line even when I just didn't climb the tree after Katniss did (when I very well could have), or when I didn't think to throw my knives at her. I could have, of course, but I'm not that kind of person, contrary to popular belief. Hopefully everyone just thought I was just another stupid tribute from 2. If it were just my own life on the line, I wouldn't care; in fact, I would help Katniss defy the Capitol. Because I know that that is her destiny. Whether she wants it or not. But it's not mine. My sister is more important to me than anything. My situation is sort of like Katniss's, but my district is full of Capitol-lovers. My sister would not be safe there at all if I were to rebel in the Games. I slam into Katniss, avoiding her arrow, and place my knees on her shoulders, pinning her to the ground. I did this so she might be able to kick me off of her, but she's obviously too discombobulated to think of that. Come on, Katniss, just kill me already, I think.
"Where's your boyfriend, District Twelve, still hanging on?" I ask.
"He's out there now. Hunting Cato," she growls. "Peeta!" she yells. I punch her throat without thinking, cutting off her scream. Although I know that Cato will never win, I still can't accept that he must die. I glance around. I told Cato to stay farther away then he really should, because I don't want him interfering. He doesn't know that I don't plan to come out of the arena alive. I whip my head around, but I don't hear anything.
"Liar," I say, trying to put a grin on my face. "He's nearly dead. Cato knows where he cut him. You've probably got him strapped up in some tree while you try to keep his heart going. What's in the pretty little backpack? That medicine for Lover Boy? Too bad he'll never get it." I hate saying these things, but I must. Katniss struggles around. I have to come up with an excuse to not just kill her now. Think, Clove, think! An idea pops into my head, and I open my jacket. A large array of knives is strapped to it, and I select the smallest one.
"I promised Cato if he'd let me have you, I'd give the audience a good show." Now she's really struggling. Come on, Katniss, think of a way to kill me. I realize it's probably useless, but then I hear him. Just his breaths, behind the cornucopia. This better work, I think.
"Forget it, District Twelve," I say loudly. "We're going to kill you. Just like we did your pathetic little ally... what was her name? The one who hopped around in the trees? Rue? Well, first Rue, then you, and then I think we'll just let nature take care of Lover Boy. How does that sound? Now, where to start..." I hope that was convincing enough. Moreover, I hope he heard. I wipe away the blood from Katniss's forehead and stare at her face, tilting it from side to as if I'm trying to decide how to ruin it, when really I'm just trying to buy time. Come on... come on... Katniss tries to bite my hand.
"I think... I think we'll start with your mouth," I say, tracing her lips with the knife. I'm sure all the cameras are on us by now, so I have to be very convincing. She stares me down, no fear in her eyes, only dignity. It's moments like these when I feel best about my decision to sacrifice myself and let Katniss win and become the symbol for the rebellion. I can already tell that she will be. The way she stares down death, ready to die in her own way, not the Capitol's. But she won't die, not now.
"Yes, I don't think you'll have much use for your lips anymore. Want to blow Lover Boy one last kiss?" Katniss chooses this moment to spit saliva and blood in my face. I pretend to be angry, but I just feel triumph. I can imagine her now, spitting in the Capitol's face. Then I hear him. Coming up quietly behind me.
"Alright then," I say, pretending to be oblivious to his presence. "Let's get started." All of a sudden, he yanks me away from Katniss. I fake a scream, dangling from his arms. The boy from 11. Thresh. He flings me down to the ground, and I scramble backwards, pretending that I think that there is any chance of escape at all. Thresh shouts,
"What did you do to that little girl? You kill her?"
"No! No, it wasn't me!" I fake-whine. The Capitol loves whiners. It shows them that even the strongest of tributes are weak, helpless cowards. If only they knew how brave I was.
"You said her name. I heard you. You kill her? You cut her up like you were going to cut up this girl here?" Though I act panicked on the outside, I'm really quite calm on the inside. I have accepted that I will die now, and my only regret is that Katniss will never know what I have done for her. But no one must know.
"No! No, I-" Then I see the large rock that Thresh raises above his head. And suddenly I start to panic, because I want Cato to be with me when I die.
"Cato!" I yell. "Cato!" He is close enough that he will hear me and get to me (hopefully) before I am gone, but far enough that I will already be good as dead. This was my plan. I don't regret it.
"Clove!" he shouts from a distance. Thresh brings the rock down upon my skull.
Blinding pain erupts, but not enough that I can't still think straight and be aware of my surroundings. I faintly hear Thresh and Katniss talking, but it's okay, I know that he won't kill her. I know Katniss treated that Rue girl with kindness, respect, and, as a slap on the face to the Capitol, buried her in a bed of flowers. I know because I watched through the bushes. I see the fuzzy outline that must be Thresh grab his own and also Cato's backpack, and I know that he has done Katniss a favor. Then he's at my side. Cato.
"Clove," he gasps, feeling my head. I smile at him. "You're-you're gonna be alright, Clove," he says desperately, more to reassure himself than me. I slowly shake my head.
"St-stay with me, Clove!" Cato begs, holding my hand. He has dropped his weapons, sitting there defenseless. He kisses my lips, then my brow, running his hands through my bloody hair. Both Katniss's situations and mine are much alike. We both volunteered for our sisters, we both are star-crossed lovers. But nobody really knows about me, nobody cares about the "ruthless" career from Two. But that's okay. No one must know.
"I'm gonna kill her," Cato says harshly as I begin to slip away. "I'm gonna kill Katniss for what she's done." And I slowly, almost imperceptibly, shake my head.
