As the car rolls up to the building that I will be calling my home for the next year of my life, I can feel my stomach drop. New people, new places, I'll be surprised if I don't suffer from panic attacks every day in this social death trap.

"Clary, we are here!" My mom chirps excitedly.

"Yayyy…" I mutter sarcastically.

It's move in day and everywhere I look there are parents and students alike moving boxes of all sizes into one of four buildings that they call the Freshman Quad. The brick buildings are actually much nicer than I expected. The windows were like mirrors reflected the blue sky and big fluffy clouds. My fingers itched for my sketchbook.

"Come on honey, let's get you moved in…"

We bring up the first of the boxes to my room. After the incident last year and the anxiety that comes with starting college, my mother agreed to pay for a single room. It was small but it was mine. The big window opposite the door helped to illuminate the off white walls and make the room appear larger than it actually was.

"This is cute. What do you think?" My mom asked, placing the box next to the bed.

"It's okay, I guess"

The sadness in her eyes was evident. I didn't mean to hurt my mom by closing off like this but I just couldn't deal with letting anyone in just yet.

"Well once we give it the ol' Fray makeover it will be perfect!" It was evident that she was really trying to keep our last few hours together somewhat positive.

It didn't take very long for us to create a bedroom that any college student would be jealous of but that's what you get when both you and your mom are pretty talented artists. The walls were completely covered in tapestries, old Asian scrolls, and paintings. Christmas lights gracefully draped along the walls and beautiful sculptures adorned the desk. It was organized chaos. It was me.

Mom and I spent some time enjoying the atmosphere that we had created. When the sun went down, the Christmas lights turned on and the intimacy of the space heightened. We were alike in so many ways. From our fiery red hair that matched our personalities to the way we liked our eggs, pancakes, and meats.

"Hey Clary?" She broke me out of my trance.

"Yeah?"

"I know this is hard, but please….just try…..try to enjoy college."

I softened at the sincerity in her voice, "I will."

Mom turned her head towards the window.

"Well it looks like I should be heading out, it's getting dark" She said standing up and smoothing out her jeans.

As I walked her down to her car, she reminded me to brush my teeth every night and to never go to bed without makeup on. She was such a mom. But I was grateful for her love and support.

We hugged one last time before she got back into the black Honda mini van and drove away.

I hugged myself against the cooling evening air and slowly walked back inside. I could feel the anxiety in the pit of my stomach beginning to grow at the idea of being left on my own. Even if it was voluntary.

The anxiety was growing more than expected. I picked up my pace almost completely running down a tall very handsome guy that two girls where practically drooling over in their doorway.

"Sorry" I mumbled as I walked away, keeping my head down, arms still hugging my middle even though the dorm was well heated. Before making my getaway I caught a glimpse of gold eyes that seemed to pierce my sould.

"Can you believe that girl? Such a freak" I heard the two bimbos call as I headed towards my room.

I prayed that I wouldn't fumble with my keys to much and for once my prayers were answered. As soon as I got through the door, I slammed it shut, locking both bolts and curled up on my bed to let the anxiety take me by waves until sleep finally drew me to its gentle embrace.

The next day proved to be better than the previous night. As an art major in one of the most competitive programs in the nation, my day was filled of with art of all kinds. I felt at ease and in my element. I didn't need friends or even family as long as I had my sketchbook and pencils.

It wasn't until my figure drawing class that things seemed to go downhill…

"Alright class," Mr. Garroway announced, "Welcome to advanced figure drawing. In this class you will be using a variety of mediums to create the figures displayed before you. In order to track your progress we will be working with the same three models each of varying fitness. One will be extremely fit, one is considered average and one is overweight. This will also allow you all to gain a better appreciation for the human body. Occasionally we will have new models but we will be primarily focusing on these three individuals."

I look around at my fellow classmates. There is about an even split between males and females each varying in ages.

"The models will be completely naked and you will be required to draw everything"

No matter the difference in ages, the entire class seemed to groan at the idea of drawing a fat man's junk.

We spent the next twenty minutes going over the syllabus. The class seemed to drag on, I didn't think we would ever get around to actually drawing. Maybe we actually weren't going to draw on the first day. That was a depressing thought.

As if reading my mind, Mr. Garroway turned to the class and asked everyone to take out their sketchbooks and a pencil.

"Since there isn't much time left in class, about half an hour, I will introduce you to the models and you will choose one to do a rough sketch of. I would like you to focus on one aspect of their body. I also have asked the models to be shirtless rather than going fully nude."

I sent up a silent prayer for that.

"Alright, guys you can come out now."

The first model to come through the door of the brightly lit classroom was a woman, she was of average stature and weight. I could understand why Garroway chose her since although she may not have been incredibly fit she had curves for days.

The second figure was as we all guessed, a very fat, older man. But he wasn't the beer belly kind of fat, he was the jiggly rolls kind of fat which is more common in art.

And lastly was the third model and the fittest of them all was a young man with a body as though it was carved from angels. I could understand why all the girls were staring at his rippling abs but all I could see were a familiar pair of gold eyes that were staring right back at me.

And I knew suddenly that this one was going to be trouble and I didn't eve know his name yet.