Convince me. The words ring in my head long after he leaves this decadent home. Convince me. How am I supposed to convince President Snow of my supposed love for Peeta when I don't even know how to deal with love myself?

But now here I am, forced to deal with something so trivial when so much more is weighing on me. All the horrors I have seen and endured are constantly plaguing my thoughts. How can I protect my mother and Prim? How can I make a better life for the starving in my district? How can I do any of that when I'm not even allowed to think about moving forward? President Snow is making sure of that. I have to think about Peeta, only about Peeta and how to save us both. And our loved ones.

This will only make things worse with Gale. The thought flickers across my mind. After the morning we had, the disagreement that ended with him kissing me. Things have been tense with him lately. My best friend is acting like I am a complete stranger. I'm sure my display in the games with Peeta has embarrassed and upset him quite a bit. But he needs to grow up and realize there are much bigger things at stake, especially after Snow's revelation of his knowledge of my kiss with Gale. I know I'm hurting him, but I can't even begin to consider how I feel about him. He knows how much I care for him. Isn't that enough? He's my best friend. He's the person I have felt closest to for my whole life. But I honestly don't have time to deal with our relationship like I know he wants me to. Why can't he understand? I don't get that luxury, not in my position.

The Victory Tour is my last shot. Snow made that very clear. Peeta and I have to smile and be convincingly in love. But how? Ever since we got back from the games things between Peeta and I have been awkward. We barely speak. The only time we see each other is around Haymitch. We're always polite. But it's just that. Not nearly close enough to the desperately in love teenagers who almost ate poison berries to save each other. I don't know how to fix it. As everyone always seems to point out, I'm terrible with people. That is Peeta's area of expertise.

I have to somehow get through this last round of torture before I'm home free. Well, of course not home free. The nightmares will probably never stop and the scars and pain will never go away. But at least Prim and my family and all those I love are safe. I will just have to take that and run with it.

I wake up the next morning to a home invasion, Effie and her crew barge straight into my house. But I can't be mad because I know following straight behind them is Cinna. I am so happy to see him even though I know this means that I have a lot of tugging and painting ahead of me. He is the only person from the Capital I really trust. He's different. He represents support and strength for me. I don't realize how comforting his embrace will be until I am enveloped in it.

Cinna's assistants get me all dolled up into a ridiculously exaggerated version of myself. If the Capital wants a look at the real me, then they should shoot me in ragged clothes with no make up. Just the way I like myself. All this makeup, clothes, and hair does is make me feel like I'm part of the enemy. Like they somehow are under my skin. I feel sick. Effie can see the frown on my face as she announces "Show time!" She begs for, "Chins up, smiles on!" in her unbelievably cheery voice. Then I am pushed out of the house, perfectly timed to Caesar's voice.

But he isn't there, just a creepy high-tech camera that possesses an almost human-like quality to it. It snakes around and I can see the lens shifting focus. But it looks to me more like peering and hungry human eyes then a lens. My attention is snapped away from the robot camera and back into focus as I vaguely hear Peeta's name announced. Focus, I coach myself. Convince them you're in love. Convince him you're in love. I'm sure I have a slightly creepy forced smile on my face as I start to walk towards Peeta. But I hide it in our embrace, knocking him to the ground. Be in love. I swoop down to kiss him, trying to forget the cameras for a moment and make it look natural. Peeta is right there, no half-hearted kiss. He is just solidly there, even after all the awkwardness between us. I can do this. Caesar cuts into our act with some laughs and questions. Peeta helps us both up. I am determined. My smile turns genuine as I attempt to sweetly answer Caesar's questions. My mom even jumps in with her own subtle protest to me having a boyfriend. I internally thank her. It can help explain Peeta and I's lack of contact in the past few months. Peeta is witty and crowd pleasing as always. Maybe we can do this. Maybe we can convince him.

And then its over. The camera shuts down and Caesar's voice is gone. Suddenly, Peeta and I are all alone. I have almost forgotten the awkward demeanor that we have had towards each other since returning from the games. But, as Peeta opens his mouth to speak, its back as if it had never left.

"That was some nice acting, Katniss," I can hear the slight bitterness in his voice. But maybe I can play it off.

"You too," Is the smoothest reply I can come up with, maybe it will be enough.

"I almost thought that kiss was real." Peeta's words sting me. The topic of Peeta's feelings for me has been something, unlike Gale, that has not been said out loud in private. I haven't had to deal with it. So I have chosen to ignore it, hoping it will go away. But with Peeta's last statement he finally confirms aloud what we both really know is true. He is hurt by my unintentional rejection, and me making things awkward between us has not been helping. As he walks away, I find myself slightly wounded. He's a nice guy; we have been through a lot together. I didn't mean to hurt him. But even when I try to do the right thing, that's what always seems to happen.