Author's note: So, there is a story behind this. I was trying to annoy my friend who is a massive fan of Ganondorf so I was comparing him to a zombie pigman from Minecraft (don't ask me why, I don't know, but hey! It worked a charm) and somehow this was born. Sorry if you're a Link fan. Oh, and a very happy birthday to my buddy! :D
The tent stood tall and proud, orange and red stripes falling vertically down from the centre. From the top it would look a bit like a wheel of fortune. All around, the sound of excited people chattering away echoed, the buzz of excitement filling the air. There were rumours that there was a new act! An exciting act! The conductor stood there, waving his arms and guiding people into the tent.
"Boy and girls, ladies and gentlemen! Step right up! Step right up! Welcome to the Redead Circus extraordinaire! You there! Girl with the pretty pink dress! Don't be afraid! This kind of thing would be right your alley. Here, you can even have a front row seat!" He looked around, spinning in a circle, letting his tailcoat fly out behind him, revealing the colourful red underside. From inside the tent came a loud, ferocious roar. A boy in a strange green hat was walking past at that moment and he jumped back slightly in surprise. A blue fairy was gliding by his side. The conductor skipped up to him and bowed, flourishing his top hat and taking the boy by the elbow.
"You seem like a strong, brave boy! How would you like to test yourself against the Beast of the Desert? He couldn't even hurt a fly, he is perfectly well contained, I assure you." He was beaming from ear to ear, a smile that begged you to trust it, when you knew you really shouldn't. But the boy, young and innocent as he was, fell for the trick and nodded, smiling and heading into the tent. The conductor shook his head.
"Some people really couldn't get much thicker, could they? He actually looks kinda like a ridiculous weakling, what with that silly windsock. I mean, hat. It's a hat." He shook his head and entered the tent. There was a ring in the middle, a giant, fearsome beast standing in the middle. It had large tusks, though one was broken, a firey red mane and a dark, muscular body. The audience were "ooo"ing and "ahhhh"ing in amazement at the gigantic, hideous beast. The conductor smiled smugly and then marched down to the centre of the ring, basking in the applause. He skipped down and turned to face his audience.
"Ladies and gentlemen! I present to you the most fearsome beast in all the realms! Fear though not, we have him perfectly under control! He shall not be able to harm any of you! WELCOME!" He boomed, applause thundering in the tent. The beast looked down at the conductor with a look of contempt as cannons fired glitter over the audience. He was getting tired of the hylian's antics.
"I present to you... all the way from the Gerudo desert... the one, the only... GANON!" There were screams of terror, screams of excitement, screams of... adoration? What the hell?! Ganon shook his head. This really was all too confusing for him. His sharp yellow eyes scanned the crowds, landing on a boy with a green hat. Everything could end right here and now. If this beast could smile, he was doing so right now.
"I now deem the redead circus extraordinaire open! Our first act, the redead pigman Ganon!" The conductor nodded in time to the applause and Ganon shook his head, roaring as something prodded him. The chain around his ankle rattled and he knew the time was right. He pulled once, but once was enough, the chain breaking neatly in two, and started rampaging. Those in the stands screamed in terror, a panicked riot starting. They all started pushing to escape Ganon, but he never lost sight of his prey.
"It's alright! Ladies and Gentlemen, girls in pretty pink dresses, little green weaklings, don't panick! Please just make your way in a calm and orderly fashion to the exits!" Ganon turned and looked at the conductor with those fearsome cold eyes. The conductor melted and a small pool of liquid formed beneath him. Ganon shook his head. Pathetic worm. The conductor shook in terror.
"Alright everyone. Panic!" He screamed, pushing his way through the crowd, scrambling to escape. Ganon grinned and chased after the green boy again, snatching him up in his mouth.
From outside the tent a contended munching could be heard, a little boys screams of terror. And then a satisfying burp. And that was it. No more would the little green weakling bother Ganon. Perhaps his time being referred to as a redead pigman was not entirely wasted afterall.
