And welcome to my very first Megamind fic! For this fic, each chapter will be named after a song that Megamind would probably have on his playlist. Each chapter will also contain anywhere between three and five mini-oneshots or they'll be just one big oneshot. If you want, you can give me a one word prompt and I'll see what I can do with it. Enjoy.


Bases

Minion clomped from the Lair's kitchen to Megamind's chair situated in front of Giant Monitor B adorned with his favorite "Kiss the Cook" apron and a tray loaded with breakfast.

"Guess who made waffles, Sir?" Minion sang.

"Not now, Minion!" Megamind ordered, waving his hands frantically at the fish. "I am about to conduct some very important research on the engine of search known as The Google!"

Minion sighed, setting the tray on a nearby work table. "It's just Google, Sir. There is no 'the.' What's the research for, anyway?"

Megamind spun around in his chair, trying his best to look proud and impressive in his bio hazard pajamas and cape. "It's for a further understanding of how to go about my relationship with Roxanne. Something my uncles briefly mentioned during my teen-age-d years but never went into full detail with." Minion was instantly worried. While most of his master's "uncles" actually did try and raise him up right, they still didn't always give the best of advice. Taking an old woman's purse had not, in fact, been like taking candy from a baby. They never said that the old woman might turn out to be a retired karate master.

"And that would be what, Sir?" Minion asked cautiously.

Megamind spun around in his chair again and slapped a button on the keyboard. Instantly, the Google homepage was displayed on the monitor. "The bases, Minion! The bases!" He spun around to face Minion again. "My uncles mentioned that there are certain bases you must go to when you have a significant other. I will find out where these bases are and then Roxanne and I shall travel to them together." Megamind frowned. "She knows much more about how to go about relationships than I do. I need to learn at least something so she doesn't think I'm a completely worthless companion and dumps me...again. That is why I need to use The Google now!" He paused, one hand still raised dramatically in the air, and inhaled deeply. "Are there cho-co-late chips in those waffles?"

Minion nodded. "There sure are!" Megamind looked thoughtful.

"Maybe I can put off the research for some waffles," he decided, wheeling the chair over to the table excitedly. He took up the silverware and eagerly began cutting up the waffles.

"You know sir, I'm worried these bases that you speak of might be something you don't want to look up," Minion said cautiously. "Remember the Search Incident of 2005?" Megamind froze, a piece of chocolate and syrupy goodness just a few inches from his mouth.

"Perhaps I should just ask Roxanne…" Megamind mused.


Rules

"Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack."

"You and I, we've known each other for years. We don't need to hash out rules or what we expect out of this relationship from each other. I just thought we could go with the flow and figure it out as it comes along."

"Nope, sorry, my mind's made up. We're discussing this."

Roxanne sighed. "Alright, alright. What are your concerns, Minion?" She glanced over at Megamind, who was flushing a deep purple. He had tried to talk to Minion, he really had, but the fish could be stubborn and wanted to make sure Roxanne knew where he stood in their friendship.

Minion folded his robot hands on the table in front of him. "First of all, I am very happy that you and Sir are finally together. He has had a crush on your for many years now and-"

"Minion!" Megamind hissed.

"-was always doodling hearts, your name, and initials all over the blueprints for new inventions and machines-"

"Minion! Code: shut up already!" Megamind implored. Roxanne stifled a giggle at the sight of the super hero sinking lower and lower into his chair in embarrassment.

"Sorry," the fish apologized sheepishly. "Anyway, I'm very happy you two are together and it'll be nice having someone else around so it won't be so lonely with just us and the brain bots. But I'm concerned that you might try treading on my fins and taking over my job."

"Your-?" Roxanne began. Minion held up a finger.

"Ah! Let me finish!" Roxanne nodded for him to continue. "Anyway, I have been looking after Sir my entire life. I don't mind you coming over on our movie nights or giving your input on something he's working on, but there are two areas of my life I don't want you messing with: the laundry, sewing, cleaning, and cooking."

Roxanne blinked. Was-was he serious? This was what Minion was worried about? "Sir does pitch in some when it's my day off, but I don't want you swooping in and taking over everything."

OK, Roxanne. Take a deep breath. Don't laugh. Roxanne managed to compose herself and said to the fish "Minion, I have no intention of doing any of that. I will respect your boundaries and let you do all the cooking and cleaning and sewing and laundry you want."

Minion brightened up tenfold. "Really? Oh, I knew you and Sir would make a good couple!"

Crisis averted.


Liar

"I can't believe you, Minion!" Megamind growled. "All the years, all the trust, all the faith I had in you is just gone! Down the drain!"

Minion sighed. "Sir! It was for your own good!"

"You lied!" Megamind reminded the fish. "You lied right through your teeth for years! Years!" Megamind huffed and turned away from his friend. "All my credibility as a villain is ruined now!"

"Sir, you're not a villain anymore!" Minion reminded his master. "And since you're the hero now, I thought it would be better for you to know that the boots were never made of real baby seal leather! Just the same leather I used for the rest of your outfits!"

Megamind paused, considering this. "You still lied."


Author's Note: In Megamind's defense, he probably is aware that there are steps one takes in a relationship before the BIG step, but he doesn't know that they're called bases. He's going off of limited knowledge of human courtship, here.

Minion loves his job and is worried about Roxanne encroaching on his territory. And can you honestly see Minion making baby seal leather boots? No, of course not. So he told a little white lie to the boss man.