Well, here's the sequel to Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Parody and Spoof Rescue Team you either wanted or didn't want, because you either like it or dislike it when my stories completely skew the personalities of the original characters. Since I got requests in my last story telling me to make a sequel that lampoons the game's post story, I decided to go ahead and create yet another pointless parody. By the way, if you didn't read my other story, Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Parody and Spoof Rescue Team, I recommend reading it as you may not get a few of the things that happen in this story.

This story will also somewhat serve as a satire of fanfiction in general. Also, some aspects of this story may or may not be partially inspired by What Goes Down in the PC. Anways, enjoy!

Pokémon does not belong to me, although that would be awesome if it did.


The Boardroom of Legendaries, as it usually is when Arceus isn't there to keep it in order, was loud and obnoxious. The legendaries were performing their usual activities that they do whenever they act up. Zygarde was preaching to Yveltal about the environment and recycling, while Yveltal just didn't care and wanted to be left alone while he watched Kill la Kill. Xerneas was watering the boardroom's flowers as well as mingling with the flies swarming around. Kyogre was bullying Groundon and giving him noogies (as you would expect), Zekrom and Reshiram were playing Mortal Kombat, Giratina was in the bathroom, Dialga and Palkia were both munching down on Cheetos Puffs, and Mewtwo was nowhere to be seen. Regirock, who was the oldest and most mature of the Regi trio (and the sanest of all the legendaries), was the only one actually behaving, and seemed rather embarrassed with how all the other legendaries are acting. His two brothers, Regice and Registeel, on the other hand were trying to watch Kill la Kill with Yveltal, but couldn't because of how annoyed they were Zygarde's preaching. Finally, after being driven over the edge, Registeel snapped.

"Shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!" Registeel tackled Zygarde and began beating him up.

"Not the face! Not the face!" pleaded Zygarde. "I need that face for protests!"

Regirock grabbed Registeel and attempted to restrain him.

"Now, now, Registeel," Regirock calmly assured his younger brother. "Remember what your therapist said. Being angry all the time is bad for your health."

"I'M NOT *bleep* ANGRY ALL THE TIME!" Registeel yelled at Regirock.

"Someone needs a stress ball," Dialga remarked as he grabbed a handful of Cheetos and stuffed it into his mouth.

"SHUT UP!"

"Alright, that's five dollars in the swear jar for dropping the F-bomb." Regirock sternly replied. "We made a promise not to make this story rated M." He held out a jar filled to the brim with cash. "Now pay up."

"I'm sorry, Regirock," Registeel apologized as he took out his wallet, opened it, pulled out ten dollars, and threw it into the jar. "It's just that ever since we've been driven out of Buried Relic by those stupid greedy rescue teams, I've just been so *bleep* angry all the time!"

"Aha!" Regice, the youngest of the three brothers, sang. "Five more dollars to the swear jar!"

Registeel growled furiously as he yanked another ten dollars from his wallet and shoved it into the jar.

"Yo, this place sure is getting boring," Kyogre stated. "Anyone mind if I play some dubstep?"

"What's dubstep?" Groundon asked, confused.

"This!" Kyogre took out a boombox and played "Scary Monsters and Nice Sprites" by Skrillex.

"Oh...my. This sounds...rather interesting."

"OHHHHH MYYYYY GOOOOOD!"

As soon as the bass dropped, Groundon began screaming in terror and running out the room. Kyogre laughed maniacally as he turned off the boombox. "Man, what a wuss. He can't even handle a simple bass drop."

"That wasn't nice!" Xerneas scolded Kyogre. "You should apologize!"

"Go talk to trees or something."

"Excuse me?! Trees happen to be the nicest creatures in the world! They are way better people than you, Kyogre!"

"Bro, I rather be a not nice person than a tree-hugging hippie like you."

"OHHHHHHHH!" Regice yelled. "It's on now!"

"Hippie, you say? Well, I never! You take that back!"

"Bring it on, Bambi!"

"No way! You freaking cheated!" Zekrom yelled.

"Did not!" retorted Reshiram.

"Did too!"

Eventually everyone began to argue with each other, breaking out into a full fledged fight. Finally, Arceus entered the room, along with Celebi, who served as his associate (who is also in love with him apparently). Seeing how everyone was fighting, Arceus became angry.

"SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILEEEEEEEEEEEEENCE!"

The room became quiet.

"What in the name of heavens is going on here?! I asked you all to behave and now look what has happened! Proof that I can't trust you even when I'm out of the boardroom for five minutes to get Subwa-er, I mean do paperwork."

"Sorry, Arceus," the legendaries apologized.

The toilet flushes. The door to the bathroom opens, in which Giratina exits. "Phew!" Giratina sighed. "That's the last time I have Chipotle for lunch! What'd I miss?" Giratina noticed the place was a mess from the legendaries fighting. "What the-?!" He exclaimed. "You guys threw a party without telling me?! I'm like the party animal of the group! Seriously, what the heck, you guys?!"

"UGH!" Arceus groaned. "And you wonder why barely anyone takes us seriously nowadays! Just look at us! Mortal Kombat?! Anime?! Cheetos Puffs?! Dubstep?! We went from a group of ferocious Pokémon who helped shaped the world into complete jokes! Kyogre! What on Earth are you doing with your phone?!"

"Takin' a selfie," said Kyogre as he was doing just that.

"WE'RE NOT TEENAGE GIRLS! GIVE ME THAT!" Arceus snatched the phone out of Kyogre's fin, threw it against the ground, and begin smashing it with one of his front feet.

"NOOOOOOO!" screamed Kyogre. "Now how will my Instagram followers ever admire the sexiness that is me, Lord Kyogre?"

"That's quite enough, Kyogre!"

"Whatever," mumbled Kyogre. "By the way, can I be excused from the board room meeting early to go to a party?"

"No!"

"UHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" complained Kyogre. "You never let me do anythiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing!"

"That's because you nearly tried to destroyed the world once."

"Yeah," agreed Regirock. "And everytime you go to a party, you always come home drunk off your tailfins."

"Not true!" argued Kyogre.

"Yeah, it is," said Arceus. "Now shut up and stop complaining."

"Stop complaining," Kyogre repeated in a mocking tone as he growled and slumped down on his chair.

"Now, before we begin, let me start by asking where Groundon is."

Zekrom dragged a bawling Groundon into the boardroom. "Right here!"

"Why is Groundon crying?" Arceus asked.

"He's too much of a baby to appreciate the art that is dubstep," said Kyogre.

Arceus groaned. "Can someone please make him stop crying?"

"I will," said Giratina. Giratina approached the sobbing Continent Pokémon. "SHUT UP!" He screamed. Groundon immediately stopped crying.

"Okay..." He whimpered.

"Thank you, Giratina. Now, next off, where's Mewtwo?"

"It appears he skipped the boardroom meeting, sir."

"Every time!" Arceus grumbled. "That stupid cloned freakshow of a Pokémon can't actually ever have the decency to show up at all of our meetings. LET ALONE AT LEAST ONE OF THEM!"

"Sir, calm down. Perhaps he's late?"

"Yeah, right." Arceus mumbled as he walked towards his chair. As soon as he sat down on his chair, a farting noise was heard.

"What the-?!" He angrily exclaimed. He yanked a whoopee cushion out from underneath him. "Who put this whoopee cushion on my chair?!

Regice burst out laughing.

"Oh, brother..." Regirock groaned.

"Regice!" Arceus snapped at him. "I know you're like the youngest in the Regi trio, but would it kill you to act more mature once in a while?!"

"Geeze, sorry," Regice rolled his numerous eyes. "I can tell you don't have a sense of humor, Fartceus." Regice cracked up laughing again. "I called you Fartceus!" He continued guffawing as Arceus continued to be even more ticked off and Regirock continued to look even more embarrassed.

"You've gotta be kidding me," muttered Regirock.

"Okay, so now that I FINALLY have your attention," Arceus began. "I'd like to share some bad news. This world is going to hell."

Everyone in the boardroom gasps.

"Sweet!" Giratina triumphed.

"Not your kind of hell, Giratina. A different kind."

"Aw, man," said Giratina.

"More and more garbage is piling up on the streets!" Arceus turned on a slideshow, where he showed pictures of garbage being piled up on streets and in forests. Zygarde gasped and screamed in horror. "The horror! Whhhhhy?! Hugn!" He clutched his heart area with his tail, and dropped onto the floor. Yveltal sighed as he started to leave. "I'll go get the defibrillators again."

"Not to mention..." Arceus continue. "The music!" Arceus took out a laptop, logged into YouTube, and started playing the music video of "Anaconda".

"My anaconda don't! My anaconda don't! My anaconda don't want none unless you got buns, hon!"

"What's an anaconda?" Groundon asked. Giratina leaned over near Groundon and whispered to him. Groundon began to blush. "Oh, my!"

"But the worst part is..." Arceus continued. "The worst part is...THIS!" He pulled out a copy of Fifty Shades of Grey. The legendaries were confused.

"Hey, my girlfriend reads that book!" Kyogre pointed out.

"And do you know what it's even about?" Arceus asked.

"No, not really."

"Well, let me read an excerpt for you." Arceus flipped to the dirtiest chapter in the book and began reading out loud. The legendaries all began reacting with shock and disgust. The Regi trio began self-destructing. Kyogre gasped and covered his mouth in shock. "That's what the ladies read nowadays?! Girls are weird!"

Groundon gagged and ran to the bathroom to puke. Dialga and Palkia began screaming and huddling each other in fear. The rest of the legendaries ran out of the room screaming. Giratina, however, seemed to be the only one not affected by it, and was even eating popcorn as he was listening to Arceus read the excerpt. "Eh," he said as he shoved another handful of popcorn into his mouth. "I've heard worse".

Finally, Arceus finished. "You see what this generation has come to?! This is all your fault!"

"How is it our fault?" Kyogre asked.

"Because if you weren't so busy sitting on your cryptic butts playing video games and taking 'selfies' all day, maybe crap like this!" He held up the Fifty Shades of Grey book again. "Would've been prevented! That's it for today. Now good night!"

Later on, in the breakroom, Arceus was pouring himself a cup of coffee while Celebi continued to flutter next to him.

"Seriously, why does being leader of the universe have to be so hard? Especially when I'm forced to guide a bunch of...of children! For lack of a better term." Arceus took a sip of his coffee.

"I know what you need, sir," Celebi began, as she started to blush. "How about a girlfriend? Perhaps one that's green and also a Grass/Psychic-type? And also a legendary yourself? Maybe one that has the appearance of a fairy? And by that, I mean me. Because I'm in love with you. Since this is a fanfiction and all fanfictions are bound to having at least one shipping in it."

"Celebi, what are you talking about? I don't have time for a girlfriend."

Celebi frowned. "I was only making a suggestion. "You know, because I'm in love with you." (by the way, I don't actually ship them. I'm only making fun of those types of fanfictions that do all these weird crackshippings, sort of like what I did in the last story with the whole Xatu and Great/Hate Canyon thing.)

"Well, I don't need a suggestion by you, Celebi. I make my own suggestions."

"Oh, come on!" Celebi growled in frustration.

Suddenly, evil chuckling is heard. An obviously evil figure stands in the doorway, cloaked by an obviously evil mist of shadows.

"Ah, Arceus," the figure began. "My old friend. How are you this fine evening? Enjoying that cup of coffee?"

"Mewtwo!" Celebi and Arceus sternly snapped.

"Aren't you two smart?" The figure stepped forward out of the darkness, revealing himself to be to be Mewtwo. "You actually figured out it was me this time. Congratulations."

"Where were you during the boardroom meeting earlier today?"

"Is it really any of your business?"

"Answer me!" Arceus growled.

"Okay, okay!" said Mewtwo as he held up his hands. "I was buying you your birthday present early. Happy?"

"Yeah, right," Arceus scoffed. "You never remember when my birthday is."

"So...heard you're having a bit trouble with the others, correct?"

"Uh, yeah," replied Arceus. "Pretty much."

"Tell you what. You hand over the universe to me, and I'll fix all it's problems and put all the other legendaries in order. Deal?"

"Never!" bellowed Arceus. "You'll just use your power for evil! I'd rather hand over the universe to Giratina! At least he actually remembers my birthday!"

"And how would you know I would use my power for evil to enslave the entire universe?" Mewtwo asked.

"Because it said so in the fanfiction's synopsis."

"Whatever," Mewtwo grunted. "But I swear, someday the universe will be mine. Even if I have to pry it from your paws!" Mewtwo begins to leave. "See you later, Arceus." Mewtwo immediately then flew into a lengthy bout of evil laughter, which eventually turned into a coughing fit. "Ugh. Stupid sore throat." Mewtwo then left. A few seconds later, he entered the room again. "By the way, do either of you know where we keep the extra laundry detergent? I ran out."

"In the pantry near the laundry room."

"Thanks." Mewtwo left. A few seconds later, he returned again, only to grab a nearby pack of Tic Tacs. "I need some mints. Is that okay with you two?"

"JUST GET OUT OF HERE!" yelled Celebi and Arceus.

"Okay, okay! Jeeze! Later, bra." And after that, Mewtwo finally left.

"I hate him so much," Arceus told Celebi.

"Gee, you two sure don't get along very well."

"Of course we don't! He was created by humans! AKA the worst creatures on Earth! No wonder they all died of starvation. And now that Pokémon have been the dominate group lately, they're becoming just as bad as humans, with crap like this!" Arceus held up the Fifty Shades of Grey book.

"So why are you blaming it all on the other legendary Pokémon?"

"I'm sorry. I'm just frustrated with them. All I want is for the other legendary Pokémon to stop acting so childish all the dang time and actually take responsibility!" He slammed one of his front paws onto the table and took another sip of coffee.

"Can't you just let them have a bit of fun?" Celebi assured the Pokémon. "You can't just expect them to sit around doing nothing for billions of years."

"I suppose you're right, Celebi. But I only want them to learn how to be more responsible every once in a while. Which is why I came up with a plan. I'm going to quit my job and put them in charge so that they'll have no other choice but to act more mature and responsible."

"Quit your job?" Celebi retorted as her eyes grew wide with shock. "But, sir-!"

"Trust me, Celebi. I know what I'm doing. I'm Arceus, for crying out loud!" He peered out the door of the breakroom, where the legendaries have now resorted to watching Kyogre chug down a keg of soda as the other legendaries chant "Go! Go! Go!"

"Gosh darn it, this is going to be more difficult than I thought," Arceus muttered.

"I thought you were the great and powerful and also incredibly handsome and sexy Arceus?" Celebi remarked.

"Shut up, Celebi," Arceus growled.