AN: I do not own anything in this fic except for my OC. Please enjoy.
WARNING: This is a work of fiction. All characters and events in this show, even those based on real people, are entirely fictional. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Prologue: The Beginning
"Huweeh..."
The kind of sigh which was free from tension resounded inside the "Personnel Only" room as soon as my butt landed on my personal reclining chair that was born from the creative vision of the King of Internet himself, that was so finely engineered and so meticulously crafted until it becomes worthy of the legendary seal of the Brofist.
My own sigh unexpectedly echoed loudly, causing all the other personnel to be taken aback, some of them even frowned with a speechless expression, perhaps because I was letting out that sigh unconsciously.
'It not only tiring for you too, you know.' that's the kind of feeling that I get from inside the room.
However, for some reason or another, I kept on leaning back deeply on my reclining chair that I was sitting on, then I lightly kicked the floor with the tip of my shoe to turn the chair around. The good quality chair slightly rotated and the state of the room were reflected in my sight.
It is a room which gives a sense of hygiene and cleanliness with its white and light green tones. A room that was only half the size compared to every other room in the building.
Some people may think that this size was just right, but those people are not the one sitting inside the cramped room filled with more than twelve doctors!
How can we be made to rest and work in this kind of small dog house, I pondered with a look similar to Edvard Munch's The Scream.
A few years had passed since I finally graduated from my own personal hell and since then I have been working as a proper certified doctor in a hospital. I am sure the expression quivering suited us students of the same major, just like a person who was going through withdrawal symptoms, if we were to be reminded of the pain, suffering and the mind taking struggles we have to go through.
And by God, the night shift is the closest thing I had to a near death experience…
Honestly speaking, it was like playing at the hardest level and everyday is a Boss Battle. But then, the result is very rewarding.
I was letting out another sigh as I rotated the epic chair one more time, and then rotated in reverse.
"Nothing to do…" I mumbled.
"I know right, how amazing it is that us doctors can only experience this so called spare time that I only heard from rumors." says Liliana, one of my co-worker.
It seems that we really do have a spare time, however for us, it feels weird. Especially when you were working as a Military Doctor. Of course, no job could be taken for granted. But my Camp hospital receives more trauma cases than most trauma ERs in the world. Where the ED and the OR work at a very fast tempo and the efficiency is down only to the training we got prior to the deployment.
"You know, this kinda gives me anxiety…" Liliana chimes again.
"You too? Girl, I thought it was just me thinking that something could just happens in a matter of minutes." and we fell into silence once more.
Then I go back to my line of thought.
Throughout my first two years of medical school, I longed for the day I would walk the halls of the medical center, running errands, accompanying my resident, and attending physicians to our patients' bedsides
On my third year, I spent so much time positioning myself to be available within earshot and up for any task, I have also witnessed many remarkable and sometimes shocking patient and physical encounters.
One time there is this 65-years old patient who had just learned that her cancer had returned and metastasized throughout her body. When others went back to grab their lunch, I return to the patient's room alone later in the day, and I was able to sit with her as she shared stories her raising her grandchildren and that she wanted to enjoy her retirement.
Because of that I understand why most doctors don't want to get attached to their patients…
At the beginning, it is very difficult to mourn with strangers and gracefully articulate an appropriate and comforting response, because sometimes all you can offer was your pity and condolences. At the time, I have certainly not mastered this task, and I fear the many moments in my future when I will stumble through this type of encounter. However, because of this experience, I know that I will need to work much harder to provide my patients with what they will need most.
Support.
Support that I will do my best in my job, to those who needed it, or even to those undeserving of it.
For that reasoning alone, I joined the military emergency medicine.
Of course, there are some pros and cons as well to this decision. Pros: My student loans are paid off by the military as long as I join as a commissioned officer after graduation and I got a job almost immediately. Cons: The fucking workout. The Physical Training is a daily routine and it is mandatory for all military members.
Some of you may think that it is a good thing that most doctors can keep themselves healthy as well as their patients healthy.
Try doing that after your night shift at the ER. Oh, and the fact that the doctors workout is a level lower than the military itself.
One level lower.
That means we have to do everything from self-defense to the training regime, just less rep time!
All I did in med school was study. I haven't exercised in ever since I graduated high school! The fact that my arms is just as flabby as my thighs only proves how hard the workout is for me.
Anyways…
Military medicine if often described as cutting edge medicine with the latest technology. Yet there are many reports of military health care system being sub-par when compared to their civilian counterpart. This is because, even though there are a lot of patients who needed help, the culture of compartmentalized system, the resistance to change, and strict adherence to rank and military department.
This means, that even though the clinical setting itself isn't adequate for emergency physicians' maintenance or even patients, they still wanted to keep the doctors skills sharp and ready for deployment to conflict areas around the globe. But they don't even have the resources needed.
But I long for something different. I wish there are more autonomy in the practice of medicine and less influence of rank with concern to medical decisions. Money is not the issue with the military doctors, but the bureaucracy of it frustrates me.
The feeling of helplessness and daily struggle with moral and ethical dilemmas. There are often times we are challenged by an order to provide medical care that we believe is wrong or inadequate.
And we have to follow them because it's an order from someone with a higher ranking.
I hated it.
That is why I dreamed of building my own hospital.
First of all, in my dream hospital, there will be plenty of low cost parking. Parking close to the hospital with big spaces enough to get kids and wheelchairs out without denting their neighbor's car.
I know it sounds a bit over the top, but hear me out!
Anyone is allowed inside the hospital.
Anyone, from rich to poor, from any age, and any color or race. A hospital easily accessible to anyone at a low cost.
In my dream hospital, there will be receptionists and nurses, real, live people, to take calls, and help to navigate the patients through hospital administration when necessary and pass messages to specific doctors
I have a dream, Martin Luther King Jr style.
All of a sudden a loud alarm rings all over the camp.
"EMERGENCY! EMERGENCY!"
The alarm is blaring all over the place.
We immediately went on guard.
"ATTENTION ALL PHYSICIANS NEEDED AT THE ER! I REPEAT-"
Without needing to hear another repeat of the announcement, we all went and run over to the Emergency Room, which is just a few meters away from our room.
Following the sounds of feet rushing towards the ER, is also the sound of something exploding. The main corridor turned into a mess instantly and some of my colleagues, including me were thrown from the corridor from the sheer impact.
My ears were ringing and my eyes began to water from the smoky air.
Liliana reached for my hand and pulled me up, away from the scene. "Up! Come on, we have to go, now!"
"Liliana!" I had to scream to hear myself, and Liliana dragged me towards the ER.
"ATTENTION ALL PHYSICIANS NEEDED AT THE ER! CODE GREY! I REPEAT CODE GREY!"
At that announcement, everyone's faces turned white with terror.
Code Grey could mean two things: (1) A combative person with no obvious weapon or (2) Acts of terrorism from conventional, nuclear, biological, or chemical agents, or other securities.
Which was already proven by the bombing earlier.
As soon as my sense of balance gets better, I ran ahead of Liliana, dragging her instead. "Faster Lily, if we die here, no one can survive!"
I can already feel her hand quivering.
When we went to the ER, it's a mess. The room was crowded. Nurses and other medics were flying all over the place and people were carrying first aid kit and bandages of sorts. A nurse navigated through the chaos and called out to me and Liliana.
"Over here doctor!"
She was kneeling in front of a very mangled patient who seemed to be a small boy and I immediately went towards the nurse. Just as I arrived, I could hear Liliana shouted for more hot water over screams of agony.
I exhaled, and counted the boys pulse "Report." I ordered the nurse.
"12-years old, a priority 1 trauma. The boy took a blow in the middle of his right was electrical activity in his heart. His pupils were dilated, we couldn't measure any blood pressure. Belly is greatly swollen. We have also found blood in his airway, as well as a tension pneumothorax on the right side."
"He still has a carotid pulse, but no radial. His HR is 145. Bring me O-negative blood bags and immediately prepare the OR."
"I'm sorry doctor, but all the ORs are occupied by a high military personnel. The Commander ordered all emergency operations to be put on hold until the operation are finished."
I tsked, "Damn it. Bring me the scalpel and anesthesia!"
"B-but the order…" the nurse stuttered.
One thing about operating on the hyper critically ill is that when you start from zero, there is no downside. But this boy is going to die unless I do something. No decision there; and, at some level and at this point. I'm the only hope this boy have. But unless I make a horrible judgement, a bad outcome is going to be the current situation.
Either the I follow order or the boy dies.
To hell with it. "Listen up you dumbfuck. This is currently a warzone! We are military doctors, either we save lives or we don't. My job now is to save this boy's life, now get me what I need or get the hell out of my sight!"
The nurse immediately straightened her back at my remark and shouted "Yes Ma'am!" as she run towards the nearest first aid pack to grab what I needed.
While she do that I tried to resuscitate him until it seemed possible to anesthetize the boy and cut him open.
Blood had filled his abdomen. I scooped it out, mopped it out, suctioned it out. His liver looked like someone had inserted a firecracker into it and lit it off. I put a clamp across his abdominal aorta, just below the diaphragm, to limit the amount of blood that could enter and leak out. I stuff a few packs into the crater of his liver and pressed on them.
My aim right now is to control the bleeding, get him stable enough.
Clamp on the aorta: done. Pack the liver: done. Pringle maneuver: did it.
This is enough for now.
"Dr. Marie!" someone had called me again.
Fuck where are the other doctors? "Yes I'm-"
But soon someone yelled on top of their lungs "Incoming!"
I moved backwards. Then all I can see was white and the sound of Liliana screaming my name in vain.
I was suddenly awake, staring at the unfamiliar ceiling.
Or the lack thereof.
There was nothing around, just an empty space. I couldn't see the floor or the sky, I couldn't even see the door or the window. It's very much like an empty spacious room that tried to consume me.
I don't like it, not one bit.
"How do you do, Marie Luntz?"
When my name was called by the soft, ominous voice, I turned my head towards it and saw a blur of light in front of me. His voice was comforting, but it did not belong to anyone I knew. Yet, he called me by my name.
"Who…"
Just what has happened?
While I was confused, I feel like him softly smiled at me.
"I'm aware that you are still confused, after all something like death comes abruptly." and as if he experiences something tragic, he hung his head down.
"I died?" I was uncertain. Because death was final. Well, that was unfortunate, I thought to myself. I assumed I wouldn't have any consciousness after death, but seems like I do after all.
Or perhaps, it's my own version of hell. To have my own thoughts alone to entertain itself for all eternity?
"I'm sure you're curious on what's going on." His voice becomes clearer, closer.
"Yes?"
"Well Marie," he paused for a moment. "There was an attack on your camp you see, it was by a rebel group. Most of them didn't make it…"
"What."
"You also didn't make it."
"Well, no shit." I snarled to him, and there was silence.
The man, who was probably some cosmic divine deity that was out of this world just gives me a soft smile. Probably saying something along the lines of I'm used to this kind of treatment.
"What about Liliana, Jacky-the nurse, and the boy that I just operated on?" I continued.
He explained further, "Liliana and Jacky was one of the few who managed to survive as planned. As for the boy, he was supposed to die today you see."
My eyes widened, "So he survived?"
"Yes. But he wasn't supposed to."
"Why?"
"Because, dear Marie, you moved."
I tilted my head, confused. "What do you mean?"
"That boy was supposed to die, as small as his body is, he wouldn't survive the impact of that blast. But in your last moment you managed to protect him Marie." he smiled.
I nodded. I let out a small hum as I closed my eyes. "I see…" I opened them. "I assumed because of this mistake you wanted me to replace him in the afterlife right?" I asked him.
"... And how did you come to that conclusion, dear Marie?"
"Well, you mentioned that Liliana and Jacky survived, as planned, and that the boy was supposed to die. It's just common sense for me to believe from what you said that human's fate has been predetermined from the beginning. And I just disturbed his fate." I said promptly.
The man sounded amused. "You're rather sharp."
"I suppose," I said, "Although I did mention it was common sense, you also gave me a lot of hints. I am nobody in the grand scheme of things. I would like to believe that I'm only a single meaningless thread in the tapestry after all."
"So then, do you want to replace him?"
"Why are you asking as if my opinion matters. I'm already dead." I said curtly. "What I want or what I desire wont change that fact."
The stretch of silence returned, slightly longer than what I was expecting. But he gave me a look just like a parents would to a child.
He looks proud for some reason.
"Very well." he finally said with a sense of finality. "But if I were to ask, if you would want anything in your final moments, what would it be?"
I slowly thought about it, " Hmm, well I wanted to build a hospital before. But now that I'm dead I don't think I'll be able to do that…" I pondered, "I suppose if I were to be judged and were to be send to suffer in purgatory, I would still want to keep my memories, I guess."
"Wouldn't the memory of when you were alive makes it even more hurtful? It makes you long for them more, won't they?" he asked.
"Yes, but that is what makes it important. I want to remember because even though it is painful or it could make me yearn for it, I don't want to forget. They are my precious memories. Even if I were to burn in hell, the good times and the bad times in my life would be a few moments of reprieve on my penance."
The warm light twisted, and envelopes the cold room. It appears to be surrounding me, curving around my body. Through that, his appearance was no longer covered by the bright light. Even though I couldn't see his face, I could tell that he was wearing white robes and is barefoot.
"I have decided, Marie."
I said nothing, instead I sat in wonder with my eyes wide and mouth open. Nearly breathless. "There's no way," I whispered. "Y-you are-"
"Remember this Marie, what I have decided is not your punishment. Merely a thank you gift for saving that boy's life."
My surroundings tightened around me in a bright light. "W-wait, hold up! What do you mean?"
Then I fell…
After that I could not listen to what he said as his voice was covered by my own scream, but I could see his lips moving to say…
Be happy this time, my dear Marie.
BREAKING NEWS
/SPECIAL REPORT\
Good morning everyone. We are coming on air because there has been a deadly incident in the UN Military Camp while they were performing their peacekeeping mission. This camp consists of more than a hundred people including military personnel, as well as doctors and nurses of the military medicine.
There are reports of multiple explosions into the hour, multiple officials have told our news source there are at least twenty military doctors dead, and many more injured due to the initial suicide bombing inside the military camp.
This started at 10:30 local time at the end of the military medicine camp. Witnesses on the camp report hearing a loud bang, it is not clear if this came from inside or outside the camping area. However, most of the injured are personnel and victims of the riot that had just happened outside the camping area an hour before the bombing occurred.
Most casualties happened on the second bombing inside the emergency room of the military camp while the doctors were handling patients of the riot. People say that some simply ran for the exit, while some try to stop or at least warn other personnel inside the camp.
The air is filled with thousands of pieces of smoke which causes a fair amount of panic and hysteria for the people inside and outside the camp
Residents of the camp which includes physicians and nurses of the emergency were evacuated after suspected car bomb which has exploded inside the camp.
Some suspects that the riot is planned to keep the military distracted and the goal is to spread fear and hope by attacking the military medicine camp.
"This is a terrible tragedy, and this mass terrorism is the new evil of our world today." said the Mayor. "This is perpetrated by fanatics who are utterly indifferent to the sanctity of human life."
This is CNN news.
Please tell me of what do you think of this prologue, good, bad, trash? I accept all review and comments.
I aim to make a fic that is realistic and light-hearted. I'm aware that Fairy Tail is a world where The Power of Friendship could win everything, but I don't think it's that easy. Of course there are hardships that each of the character had dealt with and that is no different from the OC. But I do believe that a ripple created by the butterfly could create a Tornado. There is no way that with the appearance of a new character, the way things are would be the same.
I hope you would enjoy reading this fic as much as I had fun making them.
See you soon.
