Where I Belong
Cole is gone and Mel is left alone with her memories. The fateful day she always knew she would have to face has arrived. Minor spoilers for "Without a Trace" and "Remember When". A slightly different version of the final scene of the series
Her eyes fluttered open, and although it seemed like she had had them closed for endless hours, it had only been a matter of seconds. She could still feel him. A warmth permeated the space he had occupied. His clean, masculine scent still surrounded her like a comforting embrace. His last words to her, and those left unsaid, still echoed in her ears, as hot, bitter tears rolled down her cheeks. She slowly moved her fingers to the soft flesh at the base of her throat, and closed her eyes again at the memory of his last intimate touch, that touch unique to him alone, and that she felt she would rather die than live without.
He was gone.
Mel knew this day was coming. There were never any illusions or doubts in her mind where that was concerned. She knew that Cole would accomplish his mission and leave her. But now that day had come, and she was bereft. It had happened much faster than she had imagined. She wasn't ready for this. She doubted she ever would be. How do you deal with losing a man as unique, as incredibly special as Cole? How could she just move on with her life after Cole had touched her so deeply and in ways that no other, human or otherwise, ever had? He brought so much to her once lonely and meaningless life in the short time he spent with her. After Rod disappeared, she channeled her energies into trying to find him. When that search proved fruitless after such an interminable time, she lost heart , giving in to a vain struggle to find her place, and her purpose in the ruins of her life. Then, literally out of the blue, Cole lurched into her life, and showed her where that place was. What that purpose might be. He had opened her disenchanted eyes and as she helped him to learn and discover so much about his new world and being human, she had embarked on her own journey of self discovery . She had learned so much about Melanie Porter. About her strength, her determination, and her own very special, indomitable life force. What was Cole now? Nothing more than a beautiful, treasured memory, his true identity a carefully guarded secret from curious friends and customers. A star, burning brilliantly in a far off galaxy which she could peer up at in the skies above Chicago each night from her lonely window? She could seemingly reach out and touch it, and yet it was light years away from her heart.
Mel walked wearily into her living room and settled on the sofa in the quiet darkness. She was exhausted and emotionally drained. Every time she closed her eyes, she saw Coles' face as he looked at her in those last moments before the end. Those soft, expressive eyes looking into hers' with the reflections of all her hopes and dreams mirrored in their warm, brown depths. She laughed softly aloud . His lashes. My god, that man has the most beautiful, black lashes framing his eyes! The kind of lashes that make women envious! Funny that she should think of that now! She pictured the masculine curve of his full lips, and the way his smile could just hit her like a physical force and how sometimes, when she looked at him, she found him so strikingly handsome that she had to look away because the sight of him almost blinded her.
"Please, let this be a bad dream." her tearful voice implored to the empty room. "I'll wake up soon, and Cole will be where he always is at this time of the day. In the war room, hard at work." But she knew that was too much to hope for and the pain that coursed through her, body and soul, was testament to the reality she was faced with. Ironically, the only thing that might be her salvation was the strength of spirit and belief in herself that Cole himself had helped her realize. She would cling to that, she determinedly thought to herself. She had to. It was all she had left of him now………….
Mel awoke, in a haze of confusion. She was so exhausted, both emotionally and physically that she must have drifted into a fitful sleep. Her eyes were suddenly drawn toward a dark corner of the room, and as they struggled to adjust to the darkness, she realized that someone was there. She sat up, rubbing her eyes, just as the lamp suddenly flooded the corner of the room with golden light. Her blue-green eyes widened when she saw him. Cole was sitting there, looking at her, a gentle smile on his handsome face.
"Hello Mel." His familiar greeting , warm and deep, caressed the dimly lit room and Mel thought it was the most welcome sound she could ever remember hearing.
"Cole?…..no, I'm dreaming…..Cole?" her voice caught in her throat as she continued to rub her eyes, doubting the keenest of her senses, her cheeks flushed with sleep.
"Yes, it's me Mel." He softly replied in that deep, stirring voice that thrilled her to her very soul. "I believe that my life is here with you. It's where I belong Mel, and if you don't mind, I'd like to stay. This feels like home to me Mel."
"Oh Cole, if I don't MIND?" She tossed aside the blanket that Cole must have placed on her and crossed the room. In a heartbeat , she was in the familiar warmth of those strong, wonderful arms, feeling the rock hard wall of his chest pressed against her own.
"But the wormhole, Cole, how did you……."
"It stayed open much longer than my calculations indicated, Mel. Sartop was as cold and unwelcoming as I remembered it and I knew then that this is where I belong, here, with you." There wasn't much time to think about it, but there wasn't much to think about either . I love you Mel, and I want to be with you, happily ever after as they always say in those books you humans read to your little ones." He smiled a sweet, gentle smile, his eyes warm and searching her own. Mel s'eyes were brimming with unshed tears as they looked deeply into the familiar, soulful eyes of this man with whom she had fallen more deeply in love than she ever dreamed possible.
"I love you too, Cole." she whispered .
" Now that all the prisoners are in custody, I'll have to find something to keep myself busy Mel. Maybe I could open a little electronics repair shop. " he whispered against her golden curls. Mel drew back from him. "Well for starters, you can repair my kettle, microwave, hair dryer, electric curlers, iron, let's see. What have I forgotten?"
"Electric mixer." Cole hesitantly added to the list.
Mel gave him a puzzled expression, "What on earth did you use THAT for?"
"You don't want to know, Mel." Cole answered with a sheepish grin, which caused Mel to throw back her head and laugh, a rich, full sound that filled the room.
"You should laugh often Mel, it suits you." He said , smiling warmly as his fingers gently brushed a curl back behind her ear.
She grew suddenly serious. "Cole, a short while ago, I thought I'd never laugh again." She whispered as her fingers traced the line of his strong jaw. "But now, here you are and we begin our life together….here and now….tonight."
"Yes, we do Mel. And I promise never to leave you again." He murmurred softly in her ear as he pulled her closer, her head resting against his chest where she closed her eyes and savoured the strong, steady sound of his heart..
The door to the war room was open, and the light from the computer screen stood out in stark contrast to the velvet blackness of the room. As he held this precious woman, Cole watched as an unmistakable pattern of blue dots began to appear across the map.
The Tracker held Mel just a little tighter in his embrace, and closed his eyes.
THE END
