Once again, I don't own Naruto or anything related to it. If I did, I would be rich, and have my own Rock Lee spin-off show.

Whatever is in italics are his thoughts.

Chapter One: Discovery of YOUTH!

On a cold Sunday morning, the young Rockefeller Lee was moping around, unhappy about how his hair was shaped like a lampshade, and how his eyebrows were nearly non-existent. He was only 8 years old, but he and Sasuke were the most emo-tastic kids in school.

It's not like he wanted to be emo, it's just his hair and eyebrows were so horrible, it was unbearable to look at. So after another emo day, he went to his emo room to his emo bed, and went to sleep.

That night he had a dream. A giant asparagus had appeared to him. This happiness the asparagus glowed around, Rockefeller just could not take. Rockefeller responded with,

"WHO ARE YOU AND WHY ARE YOU SO HAPPY?!?"

"I am the asparagus, it is my mission to make you happy."

Obviously our emo Rockefeller didn't respond well to the word "happy."

"NO! I don't want to be happy!! I don't want a giant vegetable to make me happy!!! I want to be emo and stay like that!!!"

The giant asparagus spoke again,

"You don't know what's ahead of you, Rock Lee, you have a future of happiness, magical unicorns, and most importantly, YOUTH!" The asparagus raised one hand up, and the other on his face, cat woman style.

"What is this "youth" you speak of, and why do you keep calling me "ROCK????" Lee asked.

"Youth is the only thing that will show you the path to rainbows and happiness. Then he starts breaking out into the happiest little elf song from The Series of Unfortunate Events movie. A little while later he finishes his sentence, "To acclaim this, you will start with your hair and eyebrows. Remember, Rock Lee, of how you can change, the shortened name is just a way to be known of something other than MCR (which is Lee's favorite band this time) and black clothes." Rockefeller was stunned. He suddenly envisioned himself in a world of…. non-emo-tastic-ness. The asparagus started to float away, his happiness following him.

"WAIT!" Lee responded. "But who is going to lead me in this path to happiness?"

The asparagus fading away slowly spoke, "Follow your heart Lee, you'll see somebody very familiar soon." And like that, the asparagus was gone, and now the newly acclaimed Rock Lee woke up.

Wow. Lee was determined to make this work. Do I really need to wear black clothes today? He snuck into his parent's room, took a bright pink blanket, and put it on toga style. There, that should make me look just a bit happier. Then he started to follow the asparagus' advice. It was first to fix his eyebrows and hair.

He decided to fix his hair first. He went to the bathroom, and picked up a comb, hair wax, hairspray, and some shine serum. He used all of this to fix his hair into two pigtails. Oh, I look so hot. And surely some people might beg to differ. Ok, eyebrows, what do people do to grow eyebrows? Ok, ummm I think…. I GOT IT!! Lee figured that to grow eyebrows, you need ORICHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!! Without hesitating, he skipped down to the nearest 7/11 looking for ORUCHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!! He went down the hair growth/removal isle, and started searching. After a few seconds he found ORICHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!! And was very happy about it. He skipped down to the register, where the clerks gave him very strange looks as he paid for ORICHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!!

Running as fast as his emo legs could carry him, he locked himself into the nearest bathroom with ORICHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!! Taking the tube of…. ORICHUMARU'S EYEBROW GROWTH FORMULA!! He smeared it onto his eyebrows, just thinking of how awesomely eyebrow-ish it will be when it was done. The paste started to thin out, but covering his newly grown eyebrows, so he took a wet towel and wiped it off, expecting his manly eyebrows.

He was done taking it off, when he looked into the mirror; it was absolutely stunning…HE HAD NO MORE EYEBROWS!! Out of the nearly non-existent eyebrows he had before, they were wiped away, plucked like a flower.

Lee was starting to think negative about youth. While he was taking a walk, the emo-tastic-ness was getting back. He was destined to choose against Sasuke or unicorns.

Later during the walk, he saw…. the asparagus. Lee screamed, his dream was coming true, and it was all so stunning. The asparagus turned around,

"Hi, I'm Gai Sensei."