This is a song fic to the song Hard to say by the used. When I was drunk and listening to it tonight I was like OMG I could write an awesome fan fic about this. So this takes place in the year 2026. Clark is Superman and like the new movie he leaves for a while. About 2 years. Chloe is his love. (Or Lois actually Chloe is Lois theory.) And Chloe had a child with Bruce Wayne. Lois Lane died and Chloe took her name for an honor in her journalism. So Ok here we go.
2010
The
singer finished singing and she's walking out
The singer sheds a
tear, her fear of falling out
" Clark you don't have to leave please, I need you, and the world needs you ."
" Chloe Please let me go ."
" I will never let you go, if you fly off right now... I ... I don't think I can ever love you again "
" Sort of my curse ."
" Clark please ."
" Chloe please, the world doesn't need me, I don't even know who I am ."
" Your Clark Kent is who you are and I am Lois Lane Kent "
" You're not even Chloe anymore ."
" What are you talking about?"
" I Have to go I am sorry, I ...I don't belong here ."
" Since when Clark Kent? Since when?"
" I'm sorry " He muttered then grabbed a hold of her and kissed her. He rubbed his hand down her soft cheeks and through her now brunette hair and whispered in her ear. " You Chloe Sullivan, you are the one woman I love more than anything, but you don't understand, I have to leave, and everyday I will be thinking of you ..." But she didn't let the sob speech continue. She walked out on him before he could walk out on her. Shedding a tear, a tear that was clear proof her worst fear had come true. He flew off shedding a tear. A tear from his ocean blue eyes. A wave, a current across his flawless cheek as he took off into the atmosphere.
And
it's hard to say how I feel today
For years gone by and I cried
Everyday from then on she would awake to not find Clark. She would try to be the Lois Lane she was supposed to be but some days Chloe broke through her skin. She would cry herself silly. She wasn't sure why she was crying, he decided to leave her, but the routine had become the same everyday the Light would break through her apartment window. It would remind her of her light. Her love. There were no words to describe how she felt. That feeling of I is not sad, I will not cry today, but then would break. Everyday the same routine until she met him. His replacement. Her new savior. Bruce Wayne.
Everyday he would spend his days soaring the galaxy, drifting in the Milky Way but no matter how hard he tried to break her from his mind, it was impossible. Impossible evens for someone who could reverse time by spinning the earth backward on its axis, or start a fire by simply looking at something. He would cry. A single tears everyday. A single tear every hour. No matter how hard it was to lose her face, the vision of her smile, it would never seem to happen.
It's
hard to say that I was wrong
It's hard to say I miss you
Since
you've been gone, it's not the same
She would yet to admit she was wrong about walking out on him. The only thing she would tell herself she was wrong for was crying everyday over him. She learned over time to forget him and not miss him. It was a long process but after everything Bruce had done for her it became quite clear the man she cherished had left but the man she loved was still next to her at night. Things Changed. She changed. She was now a mother.
He wouldn't admit that he was wrong in leaving earth. The planet didn't need him. He was trapped between 3 personalities. But within the starts he was one person. The man he was born as. He was Kal-El. he wasn't Clark. (He wasn't a nervous reporter.) He wasn't superman (He didn't give up everything he was doing to save someone who had gotten himself or herself in a ridiculous situation) He was Kal-El. He was the last son of krypton. He was open to use his abilities anywhere he pleased. He wasn't alien but among the ruins of his native home. He missed her but he was more of himself in space and he learned to not think of her everyday.
My
worries weigh the world, how I used to be
And everything, I'm
cold, seems a plague in me
Someday Bruce would run off to his alter ego. To save the city. She wondered why she always fell for the men with Hero Complex personalities. She would worry of him. Sometimes stay up all night just waiting up for him. He wasn't superman but in her eyes better. She would redden her eyes waiting for him. She would gets chills that something had happened, but somehow he would make it home safe.
He would casually get into a mood and fly down to earth. He would stay so high no one could see him. He would watch wars that the humans waged on themselves for a thing called peace. It broke his heart. His planet was destroyed and they were killing there's. He would try to shake it off but he knew deep down he still care for these people. One person in particular.
And
it's hard to say how I feel today
For years gone by and I cried
And every night that Bruce would come home so late she would wipe her eyes. He would come into her mind. Her first love. But she would never let Bruce know she was crying over Clark let alone crying at all.
He would cry when he watched the wars from a birds eye view. He did cry for the reason of destruction to such a versatile and beautiful planet but more he cried because every time she would come into his mind.
It's
hard to say that I was wrong
It's hard to say I miss you
Since
you've been gone, it's not the same
She would feel like she was cheating on him. When she thought of Clark and Loving someone else. But they weren't thoughts of how her life would be different but thoughts of memories they shared growing up. It wasn't the same. Bruce's son should have been Clark's son. She had loved Clark since the 6th grade but Bruce for 7 years.
He would begin to feel guilty of leaving her, but he had watched her on earth and knew she moved on. He missed her but he still couldn't go back yet. Maybe not ever. He just wasn't the same since he had saw her together with another man.
It's
hard to say I held my tongue
It's hard to say if only
Since
you've been gone, it's not the same
What if I had fought him more before he left? I defiantly spoke for myself but why did it not seem to phase him? If only I had spoken more. If only I hadn't walked away.
What if I had listened to her and not been so confident in myself? Could that possibly be myself with her and my son? But since she has moved on I should push those thoughts away.
Worse
than the fear it's the lie you told a thousand times before
Worse
than a fear it's the knife
But it's hard to say how I feel
today
For years gone by and I cried
She would lie to him if he ever came back. She would tell him she was not sad he left and had moved on. It had to feel like a kryptonite stab in the back. Him leaving her was like a knife in her spine. She would cry when she saw him again. She would be wishing he wouldn't have came back
He would lie to her about visiting her or watching her rather on earth the day he did come back. She had left him before he left her and that hurt watching her walk away from him. A pain indescribable. He can't begin to imagine how she felt that day; he can't explain how he felt that night.
It's
hard to say that I was wrong
It's hard to say I miss you
Since
you've been gone, it's not the same
It's hard to say I held my
tongue
It's hard to say if only
Since you've been gone, I'm not
the same
It's hard to say (God, it's hard to say)
Since you've
been gone,
I'm not the same
If he ever did return to earth, it would be the hardest thing she would ever do to see him again and not shed a tear. She missed him, She would never admit it but she missed him. She loved Bruce but he was no Superman. Things had changed since he left but her heart had not. She couldn't shake him from her memory and she knew she never would.
He knew if he ever returned to earth it would be the hardest thing he would ever have to do. To speak to her again. To hold her again. To look into her eyes again. He would admit to missing her everyday but knew he would only get a, " Then why did you leave me or not visit me?" In return. For which he had no reply. He wasn't the same man that had left but hoping one day he could be better. He couldn't rid that smile from his memory. That image of that Blonde 16-year-old toothy grin he fell in love with. He knew he never could and never would.
