Author's Note: Hello! Just a little warning before you start reading. This story explores the taboo and there are some quite dark themes in it. You have been warned. Enjoy!


Chapter One

To: Hinata

From: Sakura

Subject: A confession

Hinata, I have known you almost all my life, and I feel that I can fully trust you to tell my confession. Please do not judge me for what I'm about to say, because that will only break my heart into pieces since you're the only person I can tell. Also, please keep this to yourself. I don't want anybody else to know.

I am in love with a man fifteen years older than I am. It's not a crush. I know it's not a crush. Crushes only last for a few months. I really am in love with him. I've been in love with him since the day I laid my eyes on him.

It happened during the entrance ceremony. The school headmaster was delivering a boring speech, and my eyes were still heavy because I didn't get much sleep the previous night. Before I could close my eyes and quietly fall asleep, the headmaster ended his speech and walked back to his seat. What happened next was a bright shade of gray filling my vision. He awkwardly stood behind the podium, grinning like a fool. Despite the awkwardness radiating from him, I found him irresistibly charming. It was probably because of the sharpness of his jawline, his deep meaningful black eyes, and his gray hair. I thought he was an old man of fifty at first, but I later I didn't find a single trace of wrinkles on his face. There is an air surrounding him that makes you feel attracted to him the moment you set your eyes on him—it has the same effect on the girls at my school, as well. I fell hopelessly in love with him right away.

He teaches Japanese to second year students, as well as first year, but only to some classes. His name is Hatake Kakashi. I often find myself saying his name in my own solitude, my mouth taking a trip on the three syllables that sounds oh so sweet in my ears.

Nothing significant happened throughout my first year of school. I remember cursing at no one particular because he didn't teach my class. But I would always look away whenever I came across him in the hallway. I don't think he noticed me for my pink hair. It's odd because it would usually bring attention to those who sees it.

Then something happened, Hinata.

This spring when I came into the classroom and sat down on my desk in the middle row as a second year student, Hatake-sensei walked in and announced he is my homeroom teacher. My heart was beating so fast I was scared that people could hear. Or maybe I was scared for it to pop right out of my chest. I tried to remain calm, but my face felt like it was burning.

Again, he stood there behind his desk, grinning like an idiot just like when I first saw him. When he called my name for attendance, I felt the warmth from my cheeks slowly crawl down to my stomach, and finally reached my loins. His voice saying my name echoed in my head, and I felt my whole being turning to jelly. I couldn't understand why his voice was able to turn on all of my senses. I could smell the blossoms outside the school building and the hot lunches my classmates had in their bags. I could hear the faint footsteps in the hallway loud and clear. It was a strange experience.

My love for him started out as an innocent, normal schoolgirl crush, but then it developed into something deeper as quickly as the changing of the seasons. And then, I began to lust over him.

I was lying in bed one night and suddenly I remembered the first time he said my name during attendance. I felt tingling sensations between my thighs, and I wondered if that was the feeling my friends liked to talk about. I pictured kissing him, while his fingers trail down my skin and have sex with me. That was the first time I've ever masturbated, and he was on my mind the whole time until I finished.

I'm sorry if that was weird and made you uncomfortable, but I want to come clean to you about everything. So please bear with it.

At times I find myself admiring the tightness of his buttoned down shirt around his chest. I imagine running my fingers there and down to his abdomen. I reach inside his pants and feel his excitement in my hand, and I hear his dark voice saying my name.

Oh my god, I want him. I want him. I want him. I want him.

All these thoughts are slowly destroying me I can't even go to school and look at him in the eye. I've begun to fear of him able to see right through me and know all of my secrets that I've kept so deeply in my heart.

I'm at home right now, instead of being there at school attending classes like any other students should be doing. I haven't been able to sleep these past few weeks ever since I slowly stopped showing up to school. I wouldn't be able to sleep until I confess everything to someone. And you are that someone, Hinata.

I'm sorry if my confessing has somewhat bothered you. If you look at things from a normal point of view, you will think that I'm disgusting and perverted for wanting to bang my teacher. Maybe I am disgusting. Maybe I am perverted. But I love him. And I desire him.

Please answer,

Sakura