Castiel's introduction to humanity began with the internet. Or, more specifically, email.

It was the only form of online communication that Dean was somewhat adept at, and he'd managed to convince the Angel that it was a necessity.

Of course, he should have expected that Cas would set about the task with the same level of determination he applied to all his endeavours. Choosing an email address had taken him days, since he'd debated over each option with the gravitas of a person picking out a name for their first child. In the end, he'd ignored all of Dean's – frankly genius – suggestions (wingman83 and shotgunangel among them), instead opting for the sensible, and entirely boring, castielaotl (the dork had used his Angelic title in place of a surname).

Then Dean had figured that with all the time Cas had been spending on Earth lately, he might as well learn how to use a browser. What he hadn't anticipated was how quickly Cas would familiarise himself with all things technology-related. Or how invested he would become in the world wide web.

Naturally, Cas' idea of internet activity was not at all the fun kind. Instead it veered more towards the hardcore-research, spend-three-hours-reading-up-about-guinea-pigs kind. All this to say that he and Sam now traded health food facts like they were Pokémon cards (despite the fact that Cas didn't even eat), and Dean frequently received links to articles with names like '13 Fascinating Facts About Bees', 'The 25 Most Dangerous Animals in the World', and '10 Bizarre Ways to Die'.

He would have told the guy to knock it off, except …he actually enjoyed reading all the weird and wacky shit Cas sent him. Those bee facts were pretty fascinating, and he found it hilarious that some schmuck had broken his neck tripping over his own beard, and who would have thought that mosquitos were the deadliest animal?

Although Dean would never admit to it, the stuff that Cas dredged up from the depths of the internet was a source of constant amusement and intrigue.

So yeah, hooking an Angel of the Lord up with an email account might have been one of the best ideas he'd ever had.

Agreeing to help his brother and said Angel to research their latest case? Not so much.


Dean heaved an inward sigh as he pushed open the glass doors, stepping into the local library of Anderson, Missouri. He would never understand why Sam actively chose to spend time in places like this. The oppressive atmosphere of rustling paper and hushed voices did nothing but make Dean feel claustrophobic. It didn't help that the whole place was done up like the inside of a marshmallow for Valentine's Day, with pink streamers hanging from the ceiling and heart-shaped balloons tied to the bookshelves. As if anyone was going to go on a romantic date in the freaking library.

They'd been brought here by a bunch of missing persons reports – eight in the past two weeks alone. Turned out, a particularly creative high school teacher-turned-witch had been kidnapping people and turning them into frogs. And then using them as dissection specimens for her tenth grade biology class. Cute.

The good news was that they'd managed to gank the psycho before things got out of hand. The not-so-good news? They now had twenty live frogs in their motel room with no way of reversing the spell. Hence the study session.

Dean walked towards the study area, rounding a corner to see Sam and Cas hunched over a table with books spread out all around them. They were engaged in a very intense discussion, which he caught part of as he drew closer.

"He was never supposed to see it!" Cas was saying in a rushed, anxious whisper.

"Okay, calm down." Sam raised his hands in a placating gesture. "I'll get rid of it. But I really think you guys should at least talk about this. I mean, maybe this is the right time to–"

"What did I miss?"

Both of their heads jerked up at once, the conversation ceasing abruptly. There was a beat of silence. Then Cas said "Nothing", at the same time that Sam said, "Just, uh…stuff".

Dean looked between the two of them. "Alright, what happened?"

"Well…" Sam began falteringly, "There's actually–"

"It doesn't matter." Cas levelled Sam with his 'I-will-smite-you-where-you-stand' expression.

"Right," Dean said, and sat down beside them. "Should we hit the books, then? If you two are done with…whatever this is."

He looked at Castiel, who seemed completely absorbed in the table, and then at Sam, who simply shook his head and sighed. Well, okay then.


Research turned out to be an extremely arduous process. Dean was reminded immediately of why he left this part of the investigation to Sam. But he'd felt charitable, for once, and now he was stuck reading about ancient pagan spells on the most romantic day of the year. Sam kept throwing him strange looks, as if he'd sprouted a second head. And to add icing to this crappy cake, Cas was pretending he didn't exist. Their eyes met occasionally, but then he would glance away to the wall, or the floor, or basically anything that wasn't Dean. It was freaking him out. He was used to Cas' unwavering intensity, to that gaze that was startlingly close and endlessly blue. The absence of it felt as though something had been lost, something Dean wasn't sure he'd even found to begin with.

After two hours of what felt like scraping a cheese grater against his forehead, Dean slammed his book shut and stood up from the table. Cas looked at him, finally, as did Sam.

"I'm gonna take a break. Check some emails or something."

Cas swivelled his head in Sam's direction so fast that Dean was sure he heard a muscle in his neck crack. Sam shot him a loaded look, his face grim.

He sighed. "What?"

His brother opened his mouth, coughed, and said, "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Why? We're almost done here."

"Well, not really. That reversal spell I found was for reptiles. We have no idea if it'll even work on amphibians."

"So we're halfway there. Whatever." Dean threw up his hands. "You can manage without me for five seconds."

"But Dean–"

"No," he snapped, "This sucks, and I'm tired, and you guys are being fucking weird. So I'm gonna take my break, and I'll be back in ten minutes."

Sam fell silent, adopting that kicked-puppy expression he had perfected. Castiel, beside him, looked entirely miserable.

Dean turned away from both of them and headed for the row of computers at the back of the library. He swatted at a bunch of pink balloons on the way, which made him feel marginally better.

Ten minutes. He just needed ten minutes. Then he'd go back and apologise and hopefully Cas would stop acting so strange and actually talk to him, damnit.

The only other people at the computers were a balding man and a group of teenagers whispering amongst themselves. They barely glanced up as Dean passed. He sat down, took a minute to compose himself, then logged into his email account. He had four unread messages.


From: jmills

To: originalbatman

Sent: Tuesday, January 27, 2015 4:56 PM

Subject: Status Update

Haven't heard from you lately. How are things?

Alex is finally settling in and making some friends. There was also a slight incident last week involving her car and a school bus, but little victories, right?

Donna says hi, by the way. She's been real quick on the uptake with all that supernatural lore. You might have another hunter on your hands!


From: jmills

To: originalbatman

Sent: Thursday, February 12, 2015 5:05 PM

Subject: Hello?

Are you alive? Are you dead?

Seriously, the least you boys could do is check in once in a while.


From: notyourclairebear

To: originalbatman

Sent: Thursday, February 12, 2015 8:41 PM

Subject: this is your fault

if castiel sends me one more fucking email about the dangers of underage drinking i will shoot myself


And sitting at the very top of his inbox, an email from Cas himself. It was a link, of course, accompanied by the usual array of emoticons. Dean smiled in spite of himself, clicking onto it. It was probably one of those dumb videos about unlikely animal friendships. Cas had showed him one once, voice earnest as he said 'It's truly an amazing story, Dean'.

The page finally loaded, and Dean froze. It was definitely not a dumb animal video.

'How to Get a Guy this Valentine's Day!' was the cheerful headline, coloured hot pink and bolded for emphasis. Under it, in smaller font, were a series of steps set out like a method in a cookbook.

He clicked back to his email, fast, his face flaming.

What the fu–

"Dean."

Cas stood behind him, his expression equal parts mortified and apologetic.

"What the hell, Cas," he said, far too loudly for a library. The teenagers turned to look at them, while the balding man tried to pretend he wasn't listening to every word they were saying.

"I can explain," Castiel started, and Dean shook his head.

"Not here."

He lead Cas away from the computers, down rows and rows of bookshelves until they reached a section of the library that was unoccupied.

It was only once they were out of earshot that Dean turned to face the Angel, scowling. "Is this your idea of a joke?"

"No, I–"

"Look, Cas, I don't know what you're playing at, but–"

"I apologise, Dean. It was an accident," Cas said to the ground. He was doing that thing again where he refused to look at him. "Sam was going to delete the email from your inbox as soon as we got back to the motel."

"Yeah, right," Dean scoffed, "Accidents don't just happen accidentally."

"I'm not lying, Dean. I intended to send you something else, but I was reading that article at the same time and the two got mixed up."

He opened his mouth to fire back another remark, but something about what Cas had said caught his attention. "Wait," Dean said, "You were reading that?"

"Yes." Cas met his eyes briefly. "How else could I have sent it to you?"

"I don't know," Dean said slowly, "I kinda thought you were making fun of me."

"For what?" Now he sounded puzzled.

"Um. For liking dudes?" He realised as he said it just how stupid the notion was. Castiel, genderless Angel, sending biphobic emails. He would have laughed, if his mind wasn't currently trying to wrap itself around something else.

"But…if it wasn't for that, then why were you reading it?"

"That is not of import," Castiel said hastily. He suddenly seemed distinctly uncomfortable.

Dean stared at him, mouth agape. Was he blushing?

"Cas," he said, quieter, "why were you reading that article?"

Nothing. Not a word.

"Hey," Dean said, "Look at me, will you?" He was tired of Cas' long silences and averted gazes, of how they tiptoed around each other.

Cas turned his head to face him, his eyes a flash of colour among all the library's dusty browns. Slivers of sky in the enclosed space. Dean took in a breath, wondered why he'd ever pretended that he didn't want Cas to look at him like that, always.

"Was that…were you planning to use that advice on someone anytime soon?"

"Would it matter if I was?" Cas asked.

Dean noticed, suddenly, how close they were standing. Of course, once he noticed it became hard not to notice; how soft Cas' hair looked and how good he smelled and a million other little things he'd tried so hard to ignore.

He swallowed. "Maybe."

Cas smiled, just slightly.

"So, were you?"

There was a pause, and Cas tipped his head up to study Dean's face. "Maybe."

"You know," Dean said, casual, "the advice they give in those things is totally bogus. Your best bet would be to ask the guy out. Straightforward, simple. That's what I've heard, anyway."

Cas' expression turned contemplative, as if he were weighing up the truth of the statement.

In the span of the silence that stretched between them, Dean could hear his blood rushing in his ears, feel his heart do a nervous little dance in his chest.

"Alright," Castiel said, finally. Then; "Would you care to join me for a meal sometime?"

Dean laughed, and the air left his lungs all at once. "Uh, yeah, that'd be…that'd be great, Cas. I mean, I'm pretty busy; got a bunch of frogs to take care of and all," he added, "But I'm free tonight."

"Tonight, then," Cas said with resolve, and Dean found himself utterly unable to care that he was grinning like an idiot. "Sam will be wondering where we are," Cas reminded him after a moment.

"Yeah. We should probably be getting back," he said, and took a step closer to Cas.

Cas' eyes flickered to Dean's lips and back up again.

"I can think of something else we can do though."

"Really?" Cas feigned innocence, his tone giving away his amusement. "And what would that be?"

"This," Dean said, and kissed him.

It turned out libraries weren't so bad after all.

Especially when you wanted to make out with your boyfriend.


From: samw

To: originalbatman

Sent: Saturday, February 14, 2015 1:08 PM

Subject: Case Closed

Hey Dean,

I'm guessing Cas found you. It seemed like you two had a lot to sort out.

Back at the motel now. There was an amphibian reversal spell after all. So I'll just, um, get started?

– Sam

P.S. Are you guys gonna be back, like, anytime soon, or?


From: castielaotl

To: originalbatman

Sent: Saturday, February 14, 2015 2:30 PM

Subject:

'You'll bee mine and I'll bee yours' – Taylor Swift

:P ;) :-*


Author Note: This was meant to be a short, sweet little Valentine's Day ficlet. Then I got really into writing it. I have no idea what genre it falls into: Romance? Comedy? Crack? Probably a little bit of everything. Fanfiction didn't like the email format I put in (they are very opposed to the at sign), so I had to switch it up a bit. Nevertheless, brainstorming email addresses to match each character's personality was a highlight (Castiel's is my favourite - because .aotl). All of the links that Cas sends to Dean are real actual articles that you can read online, by the way. I hope y'all enjoyed the character cameos (I can't decide if Jody/Donna is an otp or a brotp but they are freaking adorable either way), Taylor Swift references, and emoticons! Happy Valentine's Day xx