Inspired by fangalicous08's Frenna and Fang's TRUE Feelings (on dA).
Moi: This is an experiment. I'm going to stick Max and the Red-Haired Wonder, Lissa, together in a room for a predetermined amount of time without any supervision. When the time is up, I will carefully add a crowbar, a vase, and a belt into the room. We will see what happens.
Java: Yes, we will see... -shudders-
~in the Oak Tower~
Moi: -shoves Max into room- Sit!
Max: Alright, alright, sheesh! I'm sitting Vera...
Moi: Good. Stay.
Max: -rolls eyes- I'm staying!
Moi: -walks out of room and turns corner- C'mhere Lissa...
Lissa: Uh... okay...
Moi: -grabs Lissa and shoves into room- Ya'll have fun now. -runs out of room-
Door: -closes and locks-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: I wonder who will get torn to shreds first...
Java: My bet's that Lissa'll win.
Moi: My bet's that Max'll win... why do you say Lissa?
Java: She has to have more experience in catfighting, even though Max has more experience in fightingfighting.
Moi: Ah. Oh, look, they're talking! -points-
~in the Interrogation Room~
Max: Why are you here, (CENSOR)?
Lissa: Why are you here, (CENSOR)?
Max: I asked first, (CENSOR).
Lissa: I DON'T CARE, YOU (CENSOR)!
Max: YOU (CENSOR)ING (CENSOR)! I (CENSOR)ING HATE YOU! -tackles-
Lissa: GET OFF ME, YOU (CENSOR)ING (CENSOR)! -punches-
Max: YOU LITTLE (CENSOR)! YOU STOLE FANG AWAY FROM ME! GO TO (CENSOR)ING HELL! -kicks-
Lissa: -scratches-
Max: -tries to gouge eyes out-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: Hand me the popcorn, Java.
Java: -holds over popcorn bucket- This is getting interesting!
Moi: Very. Though their curses aren't that original...
~in the Interrogation Room~
Lissa: GET THE (CENSOR) OFF ME (CENSOR)! -elbows in face-
Max: -kicks repeatedly-
Lissa: OW! YOU (CENSOR)! -slaps-
Max: DIE, (CENSOR)! I (CENSOR)ING HATE YOU (CENSOR)ING (CENSOR)! YOU LITTLE (CENSOR)ING (CENSOR)ER! -knees-
~in the Observation Room~
Java: She flipped the curse... interesting...
Moi: -eats popcorn- What, (CENSOR)ing (CENSOR)er?
Java: Yeah... instead of (CENSOR)ing (CENSOR).
Moi: Did you notice that they're only using two swear words?
Java: Not for much longer. -slurps soda and points-
Max: Should we censor that?
Java: Nah... this fanfic's rated T.
~In the Interrogation Room~
Max: YOU LITTLE SLUT! -smacks-
Lissa: How DARE you call me a slut! YOU'RE THE SLUT! -bites, and not in the St. Fang of Boredom lovebite way-
Max: -scratches repeatedly-
Lissa: -tries to gouge eyeballs out again-
Max and Lissa: -catfight and swear-
~in the Observation Room-
Timer: -beeps-
Moi: Yay! Time to add the crowbar, the vase, and the belt in!
Java: This is going to be interesting...
Moi: C'mon, let's separate them.
~in the Interrogation Room~
Door: -unlocks and opens-
Moi: I'll grab Lissa, Java, you grab Max!
Java: -runs over and grabs Max-
Moi: -runs over and grabs Lissa-
Lissa and Max: -are grabbed-
Janice: -walks in and places a crowbar, a vase, and a belt on table-
Moi: Thank'y Janice.
Janice: No problem. -walks out-
Moi and Java: -release Lissa and Max and run out of room very quickly-
Door: -closes and locks- I have no fun! All I do it 'open and unlock' and 'close and lock'. I want to do something fun for a change!
Moi: Shut up!
Door: -pouts-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: -claps- This is gonna be fun!
Java: You betcha!
Norman: Smell... popcorn...
Moi: (CENSOR). -grabs Norman and shoves him into StupidifStupidified OCs Correction Room- Wow, we have waaay too many OCs in the SOC (pronounced 'sock') Room...
Java: You're telling me. C'mon, let's get back to watching the show.
Moi: Agreed.
~in the Interrogation Room~
Max: -grabs crowbar-
Lissa: -grabs vase-
Belt: -cries- Nobody wants me!
Max and Lissa: SHUT UP!
Lissa and Max: (CENSOR).
Max: -tries to bash head in with crowbar-
Lissa: -cracks vase over head-
Max: -bangs crowbar against elbow-
Lissa: -attacks viciously in many painful ways with vase-
Max: Ow. (CENSOR)! -attacks viciously in many painful ways with crowbar-
Lissa and Max: -attack each other viciously in many painful ways-
Max: (CENSOR)ING (CENSOR)!
Lissa: Ditto.
Max and Lissa: -continue to attack each other-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: Did you notice how it seems like they're calling each other 'censoring censor's?
Java: Yes, yes I did... *cracks up*
Moi: *ditto*
~in the Interrogation Room~
Lissa: Go to the fiery destination of your choice, (CENSOR)!
Max: Ooh, burn...
Lissa and Max: -attack each other repeatedly-
Max and Lissa: -continues to attack each other repeatedly-
Lissa and Max: -ditto-
Max and Lissa: -curse each out-
Lissa and Max: -continue to curse each other out-
Max and Lissa: -ditto-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: Fight!
Java: Fight!
Moi: Fight!
Java: Fight!
Moi: Fight!
Java: Fight!
Moi and Java: Fightfightfightfightfightfightfightfightfightfight!
~in the Interrogation Room~
Lissa: I think we should stop now.
Max:Me, too.
Lissa and Max: -walks away from each other-
Max and Lissa: -suddenly have this sudden urge to attack each other-
Lissa and Max: -do as their urge told them to do-
~in the Observation Room~
Moi: And there you have it, folks - nothing you can do can make Lissa and Max not hate each other.
Java: Except in that Missa oneshot...
Moi: Which I never did get around to posting. Oopsies.
Java: -shrugs- C'mon, let's email Skittles so she'll post this for us.
Moi: And if she won't, then we'll get Winged-Vampyre-Gallagher-Girl to do it!
Java: Yeppers.
Moi: Yuppers.
Java: Yeppers.
Moi: Yuppers.
Java: Yeppers!!!
Moi: Yuppers!!!
Java and moi: See ya!
Moi: R&R?
