AMY
Promise you'll never leave me, Sonic the Hedgehog! (hysterical crying and stuff)
SONIC
Amy…I love--
DIRECTOR
CUT CUT CUT!!!
SONIC
What the hell did I do wrong there?! All I did was stick to the original script!
DIRECTOR
That's the problem! The original script was all violent and $#!*. So we Americanized it to make it safe for 6-year-olds watching this crap on FOX.
SONIC
The Parents TV Council nagged you, didn't they?
DIRECTOR
Yes sir.
SONIC
(sigh) Look, Norman, I think I speak for the entire cast of the series when I say—
TAILS
WHERE'S THE PRODUCER?!?! I ordered vanilla iced sprinkled donuts, not glazed donuts!!! I can't work on this show until all my picky demands are met!!!
DIRECTOR
But you haven't BEEN working. You've been on strike since the beginning. We had to get a f%#&ing girl to replace you.
TAILS
I cannot work under these conditions! I mean, I've been portrayed as a 6-year-old brat on 2 of the earlier shows, I can't take a chance with 4Kids!
DIRECTOR
OK, here's my final offer. We'll give you your own spin-off. Take it or leave it.
TAILS
Aw, screw you.
(Tails runs out to lead striking mob consisting of Rouge, Knuckles, Shadow, and Big the Cat.)
TAILS
WHAT DO WE WANT?!
MOB
SCREEN TIME!
TAILS
WHEN DO WE WANT IT?!
MOB
EPISODE 53, IF FOX PICKS US UP FOR A THIRD SEASON!!!
TAILS
...Abridged version please…
MOB
…NOW!!!
(Knuckles' phone is ringing.)
KNUCKLES
Hold on, I've got a call. (on the phone) Yello? … Mr. Murdoch! How's it hanging? … What? … But why? … How could they do this to us?! (hang up tone)
(Knuckles runs off to tell the cast and crew.)
KNUCKLES
Bad , they pre-empted us in favor of some stupid infomercial for some retarded vacuum cleaner.
SONIC
What?! Why the hell would they do that?!
KNUCKLES
Rupert says that the 4KidsTV block has been less profitable than other divisions. Rumor has it they're moving us to that new CW network.
DIRECTOR
(GASP!) You mean we're going to be alongside such awesome shows as Smallville, Supernatural, and…what was it called…uh, that show with the teenagers…
SONIC
Those are all just retarded teen dramas. I don't know why, but…being in the last slot after Ninja Turtles and being followed by FOX Saturday baseball…I don't know, but it seemed like the right place.
KNUCKLES
Not for me. I just wish they'd bring back the old FOX Kids block. Ahh, good times…awesome shows like Animaniacs, Tiny Toons, and the Tick…
DIRECTOR
All right, enough reminiscing. That's a wrap, everyone. See you next season. Oh, BTW, Mr. Grossfeld wants to see you in his office, Sonic.
SONIC
Nothing good could come of this…
Stay tuned for more chapters coming up!
