We Run :)
It was hard for Brendan to tell Ste the truth, he had spent so long in denial pretending that it didn't happen that when he did tell Ste what a disgusting man Seamus was, it hit him hard all over again. Admitting to anyone that your own father abused you, not only mentally, but physically and sexually as well was bad enough, but admitting it to Ste was something else. Once Brendan started to talk to Ste, he soon found he couldn't stop. He opened the can of worms that had been the cause of all his ill willed nature and he didn't look back.
Ste's silent tears were heart breaking for Brendan to witness but this overdue confession had to be told. Ste's warm and loving nature just made it easier for him; Brendan only wished he told him sooner. All that mattered now was that he didn't have to hide it from him anymore. Ste's non-judgmental listening ear really was a gift, one of the greatest gifts that Brendan had ever received. Ste only loved Brendan even more now, if that was at all possible. He knew why at last, why Brendan had always struggled with his feelings. At that point Ste had answers for all the questions he'd ever asked him.
"After today we get our happy ever after."
Ste's words gave Brendan so much, they gave him hope. A feeling, an emotion that he had never had before and at that moment he believed him, believed that life was going to be perfect from now on. Only there would always be someone to make him doubt his happiness, to question himself and Seamus was never going to let him move on from a life that the evil man thought he deserved.
"You've been a bad boy and you know what happens when you've been a bad boy."
And just like that Brendan's hope had gone and total despair had replaced that wonderful new-found feeling. Brendan watched as his dad took off his jacket, he had nowhere to escape; he could only shield his shaking form. He knew what was about to come to him and begging and pleading weren't going to get him anywhere now. Seamus was never going to stop and Brendan knew only too well exactly how this would end. Brendan could feel himself returning to that dark place and he became a frightened eight year old all over again.
Only this time he had the body of a man, a man who felt powerless to stop the cruel abuse he was about to endure. But that sinful kiss didn't happen; he didn't feel those groping hands on his uncontrollably shaking body. He didn't feel the warm alcohol fueled breath on his skin…he didn't feel anything. Instead Brendan heard a gunshot and for a split second he thought that it was him who had been shot. It wasn't until his father's lifeless body collapsed to the floor that he realised what had happened. Brendan let out a sigh of relief; someone had heard his prayers after all.
He wondered who it might be, who his angel was, he had no idea that Cheryl would be the one to end the suffering for him, but it was. Shock at what she had done had clearly sunk in and the tears wouldn't stop falling from her eyes as Brendan took the gun away from her and held her tight in his arms. Cheryl had saved her brother, saved him from more nightmares and Brendan finally felt free, free of all the torture and suffering caused by the man who brought him in to this world.
"I know…I know what he did to you."
Brendan felt crushed knowing that Cheryl knew, he wanted to be the one to tell her, he owed her that much. He tried to calm her down, he felt so sorry for her, taking someone's life was hard even if they were pure evil like Seamus. It still took a lot of guts and it would stay with her for the rest of her life. Brendan knew what he had to do, there was only one way out of all this mess and he knew that Cheryl wouldn't cope in prison.
Ste heard the gunshots from outside the club, he had an overwhelming feeling that something bad had happened to Brendan and he needed to find out. He banged on the door but no one came, he even tried to phone him lots of times only to have his call unanswered. His whole life is in that club and there is no way he is going to walk away from all of this, he's into deep now. He banged and kicked on the door with force and strength he didn't even know he had. To his surprise the door flew open and he ran inside to find Cheryl crying on the stairs.
"I did it…I did it…oh Jesus I did it."
"Did what Cheryl?" asked Ste who was desperately looking for Brendan.
"Steven! Steven what are ye doing here?"
Brendan rushed over to Ste who had already spotted the body on the floor. His frantic expression made Brendan panic, he wanted to shield him from all of this and he certainly didn't want him to know who really killed Seamus. He had to take the blame but how could he give up his life when it was standing right in front of him.
"I heard the gunshots Bren…I thought you were dead. You can't keep shutting me out it's not fair."
"I do it to protect ye Steven."
"I don't need protecting all the time. I take it that's who I think it is?"
Ste pointed to the lifeless body and Brendan nodded his head as if to say yes.
"Well good riddance. He can't hurt you now can he?"
Ste flung his arms around Brendan, holding on to him so tight. He knew now more than ever how much Brendan meant to him and he wasn't going to lose him now.
"I have to tell the police what I did!" shouted Cheryl.
Brendan pulled away from Ste and shook his sister forcefully.
"Now ye listen to me Chez, ye are not going down for this because ye didn't kill him…I did."
Ste could hardly believe what he was hearing.
"Do ye know what unconditional love is?"
"Brendan no! no you can't do this" yelled Ste.
"This is how it's got to be Steven."
"No...there must be another way."
Brendan couldn't think straight, he couldn't let Cheryl go down for this, but he couldn't leave Ste either. It would break his heart.
"Right Chez ye need to leave, ye need to get out of here. I will fix this and don't argue with me. Live ye life, be happy with that man of yours. I love ye. Don't look back…promise me."
"I promise Bren but."
"No buts…now go!"
Brendan watched as his baby sister left the club, she was best out of it. He was used to this way of life, but she wasn't and he wanted to keep it that way.
"What about us Bren, where do we go from here?"
Ste moved closer to his man, his eyes were tear filled and red and he just wanted Brendan to know that he wasn't alone, that he would be with him every step of the way.
"We've reached the end of the road Steven. We were so close, but we knew this would end sooner or later."
"No, you're not leaving me Brendan!"
"I have to Steven. Do ye think I want this? I don't want this."
"Then don't have it. You can't go back to prison."
"I have no choice."
"There is always a choice Bren."
"What are ye saying Steven?"
"Let's get away, leave all this shit behind…start a new life where no one knows us. Just me and you."
"You'd do that for me?"
"Brendan I would follow you anywhere."
"But ye kids?"
"They don't need me and anyway, they already have a new daddy. You are my life Bren…just you."
"I can't believe what ye saying."
"Well believe it, I love you Brendan."
"I love ye too Steven…so much."
Brendan took Ste in his arms and found his soft warm lips, their tongues joining together, hungry and desperate for more. Everything else just faded away if only for that moment.
"Ye sure about this Steven?"
"I've never been surer about anything in my life Bren."
"Ye have changed everything Steven…everything and I will spend forever loving ye."
Brendan ran his hand through Ste's hair, cupped his face and kissed him once on the lips.
"So now what Bren?"
"Now Steven…we run."
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