Witty Phantoms, insane pixies, snoring wookies, chatty aliens, pointy hatted wizards, toaster electrocution, annoying Yamis, black holes, space princesses, pranks gone wrong, fruity elves, how to groom your wookie, power failures, ooh...shiny! Munchies, coarse language, giant clams, random chases, sinks clogged with aliens! Martha Stewart, chilli powder, Elrond champion at hiding in confined spaces, Food fights, Elton John! Scandals, booze, Gollum's fling, morning after horror/disbelief, apple pie, all things bright and flammable! Kernel Saunders, Charlie Chaplin, puzzles, dreams of blarogs, nuns, Mcdoogles, squirrels, Edgar Allen Poe! The ring, Toro! Dr Phil, Steve Irwin, explosions! THAT'S RIGHT! THE SUMMER'S BIGGEST CROSSOVER! ALL OF THE ABOVE, GARANTEED AND MUCH MUCH MORE!

A vast, ye landlubbers! I, as you might have guessed, am T, Pirate Duke Of Leprechauns. Technically, I would be the "Duchess", but Duke has a much better ring to it, don't you think? Anyways, this is my first fiction, A CROSSOVER! WHOO! *Ahem * Right. Go easy on me! I've rambled a bit in the first few chapters, but things pick up in chapter four by other's standards. Every story must have it's beginning. So, without much further ado, The Witty Phantom's House On Madness Hill! Crossablanca!

DISCLAIMER: I am not Kazuki Takahashi. I do not own the rights to Yu-Gi-Oh. I wish I did! Then I wouldn't have to waste my time and patience writing the stupid disclaimers!

THE WITTY PHANTOM'S HOUSE ON MADNESS HILL OR CROSSABLANCA

A cold chill swept across the dark land, and the sound of leaves rustling was the only sound heard, besides the squeaking of bats. A dark figure slowly steps out of the shadows..

WITTY PHANTOM: Hello, reader, and welcome to my humble abode. Although things are quite dull at the moment, I assure you, they'll pick up.

RAY: Who'll pick up what now?

WITTY PHANTOM: Yes.. Reader, this is my assistant Ray. *Motions towards the small dark haired pixie*
You see, reader, I have left my mansion to a group of people for a while. All complete strangers, aside from the few that actually know each other. Why, you ask? Well, for
entertainment, Reader, what else? *Laughs*

RAY: Yeah!...Why else?

WITTY PHANTOM: That was a rhetorical question, Ray.

RAY: It didn't seem very rhetorical to me!

WITTY PHANTOM: Do you even know what that means?

RAY: *lowering gaze* No sir.

WITTY PHANTOM: I'll tell you later. Now it's time to continue this thing.

RAY: Please do! I'm so bored!

WITTY PHANTOM: Have patience, Ray. Something will happen soon, I assure you.

RAY: *big smile* like the houseshare getting eaten by ravenous beavers?

WITTY PHANTOM: *sweatdrop* No. Very well, Reader, I welcome to madness hill!

Chapter one

AND SO IT BEGINS...

It was early morning, and the sun slowly rose up over the trees. Three long black limos pulled up over the hill, stopping before a rather large mansion...
Out of the first came Tea Gardener, Yugi, Bakura and their yamis. Thinking they were the only five, they gazed in amazement at the second limo, from which a tough looking man, a small, green dwarfish thing with large ears, and something that closely resembled a yeti emerged. They did, of course, have names; Han Solo, and his pet (the wookie) Chewbacca, and Yoda.
For quite a while they stared in shock at one another, before turning their gaze to the aged, tall figure clothed in grey, with a rather long beard and a strange pointed hat, who was none other then Gandalf the Grey.
After about twenty minutes of pointless staring, the group figured out that they were, in fact, the houseshare, and they proceeded inside.
There were only four bedrooms in the mansion. Well, four in the wing in which they were staying. There were several large closets, but nobody wanted to stay in a closet when they could have a room. It was decided that Tea should have her own room seeing as she was the only girl, and, what room was better then the circular pink room with the two canopy beds, which were a bright shade of fuchsia. Tea hated the colour pink, but she decided it wouldn't be fair to force a boy to live in a pink room for two months. Chewbacca and Han chose the rectangular room, which was a shade of peach. Since there were three beds, Yami Yugi volunteered to bunk up with them. Yami Bakura had refused to leave Bakura and stay with "those freaks"', and, to Bakura's displeasure, shared the top bunk bed with him in the blue room, with yugi on the bottom bunk. Yugi and Yami Bakura fought over the top, but it was decided that Yami should get it since he was older, and the top was big enough for two people. Yoda picked the green room, and since there was no place left for Gandalf, He was forced to share with him. Both sat on their beds, eyeing each other.
"So..." Han said, trying to start up a conversation with his roommate, who was sitting cross-legged on his bed, eyeing Han. "Yami Yugi, right?" Yami nodded and Han continued.
"What's the deal? You and that kid look alike. And the white haired one with the psycho? I don't mean any disrespect, but what's up with that?" Yami smiled before answering his question. This "Han" had very good reason for calling Yami Bakura a psycho. He had made quite a scene earlier, clinging to Bakura's arm and refusing to let go, calling the others freaks and yelling curses in Egyptian. Bakura had tried to silence him several times, and lost patience, which was rare. "Fine! I'll sleep with you!" he yelled, which didn't sound quite right, causing everyone to laugh, and breaking the staring contest between Yoda and the man named Gandalf.
" The Psycho's name is Yami Bakura," said Yami with a laugh. "We are other spirits who live in yugi and Bakura's bodies. We look like them, because they are our hosts. They possess millennium items. We were separated from them a while back, but we still look like them. It's complicated." Yami explained. " Fine, I'll sleep with you!" Han imitated Bakura's British accent and laughed. Chewie made a growling noise that sounded like a chuckle.
Soon night fell. Everyone changed into his or her pyjamas. Yoda only wore underpants, which was probably the reason why nobody visited his room. Gandalf looked like a freaky version of Santa Claus in his red long underwear. Everyone had been amazed that Gandalf and Yoda had broken their odd staring contest long enough to change.

/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*- /*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*-/*- Yo Ho Ho and a hogshead of rum! Read and review, less I see you to Davy Jones! MWAHAHAHAHAHAH!

TO COME:

Of Snoring Wookies And Insomniacs!

- T, Pirate Duke Of Leprechauns