SUMMARY: This fic takes place in the mid 1950's, inside a psychiatric institution, or more bluntly - an insane asylum. Think of all the awful horror stories you've heard, about the treatment of the mentally ill back then, and insert our four favorite glee girls and voila, you've got a recipe for extreme angst and potentially very triggering story-lines.

There are no real romantic pairings in this, not between the girls at least. So this isn't a "Brittana" or "Pezberry" specific fic. That being said, relationships and friendships do exist or will eventually come about, but it's not going to be like other stories where you can clearly label who's with who. That being said, we've put it under Santana/Rachel because those are the two characters we are probably going to focus on more.

TRIGGER WARNINGS: non-con/dub-con, past child abuse and neglect (all types, especially sexual), mental illness, abuse/violence against the mentally ill, torture (not gory/graphic), language, homophobia, miscarriage/death of a child, forced child prostitution, girl!peen (Santana), incest, pedophilia, spousal abuse (all types), drug use/abuse, medical experimentation, electric shock therapy, restraints, solitary confinement, regression and infantilism (not as kinks but as part of a mental illness), murder (in a characters past), self harm, and probably more to be added later.

AUTHORS NOTE: Okay so this fic is actually an RP that myself, brittanafan, and my friend, gleesdarklady, are doing on her livejournal. The flow may seem a little awkward because of the nature of a back and forth RP, but we did try to edit it before posting so that it reads more naturally. The quality of this fic isn't meant to wow people. It's more the content and storyline we're focusing on. Mistakes are both hers and mine.

Chapters will be uploaded when we have enough new RP posts. If you don't want to wait for the updates here, you can read it at her livejournal (gleesdarklady dot livejournal dot com). On her journal we also have images of the asylum, including their room and beds and so forth.

Would love to hear what you guys think!

~Brittanafan and Gleesdarklady


CHAPTER ONE

Rachel Corcoran looked up at the New Directions Center for the Mentally Ill. It didn't exactly look like it did in the brochure that she had read. Still, the shackles on her ankles reminded her that this was her only option.

She looked to the man that was standing outside the imposing building. He had dirty blonde hair and glasses and an incredible dimple on his chin.

"Miss Berry..." He opened and she visibly cringed at the name. It was a name that she hoped to never hear again; shedding it as she had hoped to shed these shackles.

"My name is Corcoran. I took my mother's name. Took it back, that is." She said of the woman she couldn't remember, yet always remained close on her mind.

"I'm William Shuester and I run the New Directions Center. I'm so glad to make your acquaintance." He said and Rachel nodded, unsure if she felt the same way.

"Officer Tanaka, are these really necessary?" He asked and the larger man moved in conspiratorially with the director.

"She hears voices." He said and Will looked at Rachel with a smile.

"Its alright my good man. Rachel and her 'friends' are all welcome here at New Directions." He said and Rachel watched as the officer removed the shackles. "Ready Miss Ber-Corcoran?" Will asked and Rachel forced a smile to her lips as she nodded.

"Yes Sir." She said, thinking that nothing could be worst than what she had already been through.


Quinn glanced up from the tangled head of blonde hair she had been combing as voices from outside the large, communal room caught her attention. Wrapping one arm around her daughter's chest, the young woman watched as two large, wooden doors opened up and Will and some of his orderlies entered.

The man wasn't looking at any of the roughly two dozen girls already scattered around the large, moderately furnished and reasonably clean room. He was looking at a tiny girl walking in step next to him.

They were getting a new girl? Frowning, Quinn looked to her left where Santana was perched on an upturned chair in a way that only the latina could or would attempt to pull off. She looked like a jaguar up in a tree, surveying the area for prey. And from the way her eyes lit up as she also noticed the new girl, Quinn knew that she had found it.

Rachel made it a point not to look almost anyone in the eye. She learned it made it easier to do the things that her father had made her do.

"So it says here that you hear voices?" Will said and Rachel nodded as she passed by the blonde holding the other girl.

"Yes... I do..." she lied, her body bristling as he touched her shoulders firmly.

"Excellent. You will be talking to my wife, Emma, tomorrow morning. We'll get you in a room as soon as possible." He said before heading back towards the door they'd just entered through.

Quinn watched and listened as Will told this new girl about finding her a room, and shook her head quickly. This didn't make sense, did it?

"I don't understand. There's no empty beds." She said aloud to no one in particular. She often voiced her own internal monologue out loud because it made it easier for her to figure things out.

Santana clucked her tongue at the roof of her mouth before running it across her dry, chapped lower lip.

"Yeah there is," her response surprised the blonde, in both the fact she had been listening, and in the fact she had taken enough interest in something that didn't immediately concern her own, rather primitive, mostly barbaric needs. "We're getting a new roommate."

Quinn gulped at the realization, quickly looking down at her baby girl to see if she was even aware of what was going on or if she was stuck in her head like she often was outside of their joint bedroom.

Brittany was picking at a scab on her knee, playing with the tiny droplets of blood that kept trying to seep to the surface, only to be held back by the fierce press of her fingertips to her flesh.

Rachel wasn't sure what to do so she did what she always did when she was backed into a corner. "You know what is the best thing ever?" She asked to the 'person' to her left.

Some of the others watched as she strained and pretended to listen to what was being said in response. "You're right. You think that it's a nice place here too?"

Rachel knew that if she looked and sounded crazy that people generally left her alone.

The blonde holding the other girl looked over at her and she instantly looked to the ground. "You know, you aren't really good at acting crazy. Believe me, we kinda know crazy..."

Rachel didn't know what to say to that. Her cover was blown and she hadn't even been there five minutes. Would these girls end up telling on her? What would happen then? Would she have to go back to living with her fathers?

Panicking, the brunette started to cross the room towards the trio, her hands held out in front of her as she thought over how best to beg for their silence. "Please, please don't tell anyone. No one can know, ever."

Quinn felt her anxiety shoot through the roof as the girl approached them. She couldn't have been over 5 feet or weighed more than 90 pounds, but she had Brittany in her lap, and she knew from previous experience she couldn't protect both of them when push came to shove.

"Hey, hey! Back the fuck up!" Santana shot out of her makeshift perch, advancing on the other brunette and essentially heading her off. "No one gives a fuck if you actually talk to jesus or if you just pissed off one too many adults back home. It doesn't matter why you're here, once you're here."

Rachel shook her head. "No... no... no... you see, if they don't think that I'm crazy, they are going to send me back to them. And I cant do it again. Please..." She begged, making sure to take a step back from the three.

"Wait, so you all aren't crazy either?" She suddenly asked, not understanding any of this.

The dark haired girl chuckled lowly in her throat. "Oh no, we're fucking crazy alright. Just not like you crazy." She said, eyeing the other girl up and down.

"I'm not crazy." Quinn spoke up, more confident now that the new girl had started to back away. "And neither is Brittany." She added, noticing from the corner of her eye the blonde picking at her knee.

She swatted the girls hand away and placed them in her lap where a dirty, ragged doll sat. The girl relented and began to pick at the stitches on the toy instead.

Santana scoffed at these comments though. "Don't listen to her. She's crazier than everyone here put together." She didn't specify which blonde she was talking about, and Rachel decided not to ask.

Instead the brunette continued her plea, "please, just don't tell. i'll do anything, honest. I can't go back there..."

Quinn watched as Santana's eyes switched from angry to predatory in an instant. "Well baby girl, you are in luck. The only open bed is the one in our room." She said almost sweetly.

Quinn knew that tone. It was the one that Santana used on the girls that she usually forced into their spare bed. "San..." Quinn warned, looking down at Brittany who was back to picking on her knee.

The Latina looked up and smiled. "What Quinn? You are the one that always says that I need to be more courteous," she countered. "Unless you don't want to share my... attentions... with someone else." Santana added on, smirking as the blonde winced, catching on to her insidious meaning.

Quinn quickly shook her head, shifting her eyes once again to the new girl. She should feel bad for her, but Santana was right. A new roommate would mean she no longer had to be the latina's only nighttime outlet for venting her issues and her anger.

"Didn't think so." Santana looked to the new girl as well. "What's your name?" She didn't really care, and probably wouldn't even remember it, but she wanted to make this girl believe she was sincere in her welcome.

Rachel watched the exchange with fascination and fear, she knew there was something they were leaving out, though looking around, it seemed that was the usual around here. So far, this place had been nothing close to what she saw in the nice color brochure. "It's Rachel,"she answered.

"Santana." The girl replied, then motioned over her shoulder, "that's Quinn, but you can call her 'Mommy'. She likes that." She knew that would get a rise out of the other girl and grinned.

Rachel didn't seem to realize that Santana was trying to incite the other girl, and instead looked genuinely surprised, and a little sympathetic. "Oh, you have a child?" She asked, wondering if she'd vastly underestimated the other girl's age. She didn't seem to be much older than herself, and she had just turned 18 before she'd "gone crazy".

Quinn seemed to perk up again and nodded quickly, suddenly looking like a proud parent about to gush about their kid. She moved her hand and placed it under Brittany's chin, lifting the distracted girl's face up to see their new roommate.

"Brittany, i'd like you to meet Rachel. She's going to be staying in our room with us," she explained, brushing some of the girl's unkempt hair from her face. "Can you say hi, baby girl?"

Rachel looked confused because she knew that there was no way that Quinn was Brittany's mother. "Oh, I get it. It's a game, right?" She asked and Quinn's eyes turned hard.

Santana reached out and shoved Rachel in the shoulder. "Don't call it that!" She said icily.

Rachel put up her hands again defensively. "Im sorry! Lets start again, ok? Quinn, you have a beautiful baby girl." She said and Quinn's eyes brightened this time.

"Say hi to Rachel." The blonde repeated to her daughter.

"Hi..." Brittany said, barely above a whisper.

"Ok. Now that you have met the gang, lets go on a tour, shall we?" Santana clapped her hands together, walking towards Rachel.

"Wait, are we- are we allowed to just leave the room on our own?" Rachel asked as Santana snaked an arm over her shoulder and began to lead her towards the double doors opposite the ones she'd entered through.

Weren't there supposed to be nurses and orderlies watching them? Making sure they were safe and didn't hurt themselves? This was a hospital, right?

"Wow, you really bought into their bullshit about this place, didn't you?" Santana walked them both through the door and into a hallway that was drastically different to the one the brunette had been in previously. Whereas that one had been somewhat clean and well kept, this one looked as if it hadn't seen a mop since before she was born.

"I- I don't understand. Why is everything so dirty?" She asked, grimacing as her feet stuck to the floor as she tried to walk.

Santana chuckled again, Rachel seemed to be getting used to the sound. "Cause no one gives a shit." She said and Rachel was horrified.

Suddenly a rat scurried along the corridor towards what looked like the cafeteria. Rachel screamed and buried herself into Santana's arms. "Don't worry, that's not the last time you will see him. Thats where they give us food." She said and Rachel wanted to vomit.

"I think that I would rather eat the rat." She said and Santana nodded.

"Would probably be cleaner." The latina responded with a smirk.

Santana waited for Rachel to pull away from her after the rat had moved out of sight, but she didn't. She loosened her grip a little, but didn't seem intent on letting go completely, even as they began to walk forward again.

Maybe this girl actually was crazy, because who the fuck trusts someone they just met? Especially in an insane asylum. Because really, that's where they were.

This "New Directions Center for the Mentally Ill" thing was bullshit and basically a way for a bunch of rich white men to make a lot of money off of those less fortunate than them.

It sucked that she ended up having to be one of those individuals, but then again, it was better than being sent to prison or being hanged. And after what she had done, Santana knew that she had gotten off easy with her sentencing.

Rachel glanced at the doors as they passed, looking into the kitchen and nearly vomiting at the stench that was coming from it. She wasn't a big eater to begin with, but she really couldn't afford to lose that much more weight. She didn't want to actually become sick and be sent to a regular hospital, incase they were able to figure out that she was lying.

"So what's down there?" She asked, looking down the hallway and seeing it blocked by chains and locks.

Santana looked as well and nonchalantly shrugged. "The boys wing," she said and Rachel felt instantly scared.

"And does that keep them out?" She asked and Santana scoffed.

"Hell no. It works more to keep us in." She said and panic rose within Rachel's body.

Santana uncharacteristically squeezed her shoulder. "Its alright. They hardly come over nowadays," she said with a forced, practiced smile.

"So what is Dr. Shuester like?" Rachel asked of the woman that she was supposed to talk to in the morning. Santana looked at her as if she were crazy and then laughed.

"Oh thats cute that you think that she's a doctor." She said and and Rachel looked even more confused.

"You mean shes not?" She asked and Santana wondered how this poor girl even got to be the age that she is with that level of naivety. On her back, probably. Santana thought with a curl of her lips.

"No, she's not. In fact, don't call her a doctor to her face. She's scared of them. She's a former patient, who should still be a current patient." She said, unknowing why they even got married.

"He probably needed someone's face to plaster across his brochures, and she cleans up the nicest." She finally concluded.

"So after I'm done talking to her, what's next?" Rachel asked and Santana felt as the bile rose in her throat.

"Probably Dr. Howl. Don't even know if that's his real name or not, but we call him that because it's the sound that most of the girls make during his 'examinations.'" She said, watching as Rachel looked nauseous.

"Look, if you're going to barf, do it somewhere near the boy's door, cause I know this floor won't be cleaned for months." Santana said, steering the young girl forward, but Rachel shook her head.

"No, Im ok. I think that I just want to lay down." She said and Santana nodded.

"Ok. We'll head down here where the 'dorms' are." The latina replied, leading them down a similar hallway.

"So, there are four girls to a room. Multiple personalities don't count." Santana said with a smirk.

"In there is Mercedes Jones and Tina Cohen-Chang, as well as two other girls I don't care to know the names of. Tina is a cutter so be careful. She's always got a blade on her. 'Cedes is more withdrawn. Im sure one day she'll just snap and kill us all, or hopefully just herself." Santana explained as Rachel nodded.

"Anyway, this is our room. Home sweet fucking home." She said as they stopped at the last door.

Stepping into the room, Rachel immediately thought she was going to be sick. There was no way anyone could possibly live in these conditions.

There were paint chips and plaster all over the floor and beds. The sheets looked like they were rarely washed, and the bed frames themselves didn't seem capable of holding up the weight of a child, let alone an adult.

"Middle one's mine, one on the left is Quinns. " Santana elaborated as she entered the room behind the disgusted and distraught brunette. Flopping onto her bed, the latina crossed her arms behind her head and watched the other girl take everything in.

There were three beds along the wall, each separated by a filthy curtain, as well as a few broken down looking night stands. On the far left wall, by the window, was a giant crib contraption that looked more like a cage than a bed.

"That one's yours." Santana said, pointing to the bed on her left and Rachel's right. "You're going to have to find your own sheets and pillows. You ain't getting this one back." She said, indicating the one she had stolen from the unoccupied bed.

"But from what I saw earlier, looks like old man Shuester quite likes you. Shouldn't be too hard to convince him to help you out." She snickered, enjoying the other girls distress immensely.

Rachel quickly shook her head. She would rather not perform sexual favors for things anymore. That was one of the reasons she had escaped to the mental hospital in the first place.

When her father knew that she needed something, from a new pair of shoes to something as basic as a key to the fridge, he would have her do something sexual with him. He may have been a pillar of their community, but he was also a pedophile.

"This will be fine." Rachel said as she attempted to brush off the disgusting mattress and lay on the bed. She wanted to cry, but it felt as though she were too tired to even do that.

Santana shrugged her shoulders as a knock disrupted them both. At the door was a suave looking man in a white lab coat and a less than sincere smile. "Santana, I hear that we have a new girl in our little corner of the world?" Dr. Howell asked and Santana winced as she saw him, but decided not to answer him.

He straightened, annoyed at the defiant girl. "Well it seems that I have an appointment with Miss Rachel, but I think that I can squeeze in an examination for you, Santana..." He said, enjoying the suddenly fearful look on her face.

Rachel watched the interaction carefully, finding herself surprised at how the other girl could go from so high and mighty to a scared little girl at the mere mention of an examination.

She could easily guess what this 'doctor' really meant, and felt her heart ache for her new roommate. Maybe she and Santana had more in common than she had originally thought?

"A-actually, if it's okay, doctor... I'd like to um, I'd like to get my appointment over with as soon as possible. I'm rather tired and would... and would like to head to bed shortly." Rachel couldn't believe the words were coming out of her mouth.

Neither could Santana, or apparently Dr. Howell, who was now blinking at her in surprise as well as slight disappointment. "Well, I suppose I can see you now." He said, motioning for the girl to get up and come towards him.

Santana kept her eyes on the ceiling as she listened to the new girl stupidly sacrifice herself. If the doctor wanted to fuck with both of them, he would. It didn't matter who he saw first.

Carl grinned as he lead Rachel through the building towards one of his many exam rooms. Rachel was horrified to see that it, like most places here, seemed to be in disrepair.

"So, I'm sorry I didn't formally introduce myself. I'm Dr. Carl Howell. The girls like to call me 'Howl', though. They have quite the sense of humor, don't they?" He asked, making sure to make Rachel feel as small as possible.

Suddenly he changed his ways and patted the bare exam bed. "Up you go. Need to check you out." He said with a bright smile. Rachel was thrown off even more by his switch in personality.


Santana kept her knees tucked into her chest as she tried not to think about what the doctor was doing to Rachel. Despite her own proclivities were such acts were concerned, she hated doctors and hated the fact that Howl was getting to the tiny brunette first.

She should have jumped her the moment she'd gotten her out of the main room. Now she was going to have to work extra hard to make sure the girl new who was really in control.

Quinn poked her head into the bedroom a few minutes later, her hand gripped tightly around her daughter's as they entered the room. "Don't tell me you've already murdered her and buried the body." She smirked, rolling her eyes as she headed towards her bed and sat down.

Brittany immediately took a seat on the filthy floor and pulled her favorite stuffed bear from beneath the girl's bed.

Santana couldn't ignore the girls jab and uncurled herself, rolling onto her side so she could glare at her roommate. "I don't bury the bodies, remember?" She grinned inwardly as the blonde suddenly looked ill.


Carl moved back around after he listened to Rachel's heart. He grinned at her lasciviously as he reached down and began to palpate her breasts.

"Doctor, is this really necessary?" She asked and he nodded.

"Oh yes. Everyone must have a complete physical upon entry." He said, feeling for a clothed nipple and giving it a tweak.

Rachel yelped and put her head down in disgust. "Can... Can we just finish tomorrow?" She asked and he looked disappointed.

"We'll, I suppose. I do have a meeting with Mrs. Shuester to get to." He said, rubbing his hands together; so loving when he and Mr. Shuester worked together with his wife.

"Alright. Begone with you, then. However, you be a good girl." He said and Rachel visibly cringed before hopping off the bed and quickly scurrying out of the room.