Disclaimer: I do not own Jeeves and Wooster or House. Sadness. :)
Strange Dreams
"Jeeves!" I hailed as I sat in my bed and watched the said man bring to me a delicious smelling breakfast plate on this fine, sunny morning.
"Sir?"
"I had the strangest dream last night," I announced.
"Indeed, sir?"
"Indeed yes, Jeeves!" I exclaimed. "It was a very strange dream, as I said, and…Jeeves! What on earth are you doing?" I turned to see him removing my new tie, which I had bought at the advice of good old Barmy Fungyfips, and holding it between two fingers with such ill-disguised disdain that I could not overlook the offense.
"May I inquire as to how this item came into your possession, sir? I assumed that it must have made its way in here by mistake."
"You may not, Jeeves! I will let you know that I bought that very tie at the suggestion of good old Barmy," I reprimanded. "And as I was about to tell you, that very tie was present in my dream!"
"Indeed, sir?"
"Indeed yes, Jeeves!" said I. "There was this, well, I'm really not quite sure, but it may have been a…oh, dash it all, Jeeves; one of those places with doctors and whats-its."
"A hospital, sir?"
"Yes, Jeeves, that's the one! Anyways, there was this hospital. As a matter of fact, I was a patient in this said hospital." I waited smugly for a look of surprise, which was not to be forthcoming.
"Indeed, sir?"
Really, sometimes I wonder at his vocabulary! For being such a genius, due to eating so much fish, he has quite a limited number of responses. I decided to overlook the fault this time and continued.
"So I was a patient, in this hospital, lying in a bed and hooked up to who knows what, and there were three doctors bending over me. I distinctly remember that one of them had an Australian accent."
"Indeed, sir?"
"Jeeves!" I sighed, exasperated. "You really must desist! All this 'Indeed sir' must stop!"
"Ind–…Very good, sir."
"It really is quite irritating," I informed him kindly.
"Yes, sir."
"Anyways, these three doctors were bending over me. And then another doctor cam in."
"How extraordinary, sir."
"Yes, yes, of course, Jeeves," I waved him off impatiently. "Anyways, this doctor had a cane. And a tie. The very same as that very tie upon which you bestowed so much disdain."
"Indeed, sir." The tone was decidedly disapproving, but I decided to ignore it this time.
"This doctor," I continued, "approached my bed and I distinctly remember him saying one thing. Quite odd, really."
"Yes, sir?"
"I distinctly heard him say the words, 'It's never lupis.' What do you make of that, Jeeves?"
"I'm afraid I could not say, sir."
"The thing is, that very doctor looked quite familiar," I amused.
"Perhaps, sir, he reminded you of yourself in a few years. It is not uncommon for one to dream of years gone past, or years ahead."
I started.
"But Jeeves!" I yelped.
"Sir?"
"He had a beard! Maybe I should try to grow a beard," I said thoughtfully.
Jeeves eyed me disapprovingly.
"Hm. Jeeves, maybe you'd better dispose of that tie."
Jeeves smiled satisfactorily.
"I had already taken the liberty, sir." He turned to leave.
"But, Jeeves," I halted him.
"Sir?"
"I will be growing that beard," I asserted authoritatively.
"Very good, sir," he said in a rather resigned manner.
I settled down to eat my morning meal.
"Right ho, Jeeves!"
I hope you liked it! And by the way, the repetition was intentional. I hope I didn't overdo it. Thanks for reading! Feel free to review! :)
