Chapter 1 I do not own twilight, Stephenie Meyer does. (as if you had to be told)

Bella's pov

This is what my existence has come to. Running.

Running from monsters. I am Isabella Swan. People call me Bella. Well not really, only Jake. I don't talk to anybody else anymore, just Jake. He is my Sun, my entire reason for getting up in the morning, now that everything else is gone.

Now, back to the running. I had tried to go to the meadow. The meadow were Edward and I fell in love. I just wanted to feel him there. I wanted to believe he was still with me. Instead I was almost sucked dry by Laurent, and then attacked by the bear-wolves. I call them that because they were supposed to be bears...huge bears.

These weren't bears. Not even close. They were wolves. Huge monstrous wolves. They were as big as horses, snarling and snapping. They came from no were and started chasing Laurent through the now dry and colorless meadow. I wasn't going to wait and see if they remembered they were still hungry for me when they could not catch Laurent. That is, if they even survived this attack.

So I was running away. Running and falling. My lungs were screaming for air, my knees were scratched and bloody from tripping over trees, ferns and tufts of grass. I was pushing my body to keep going through this never ending forest of green on green. How far have I gone anyway, am I far enough away so they can't smell me? Then I saw a huge fallen tree, the roots lifted out of the ground making a canopy of earth and ferns over the hole, that was my salvation. I could hide, hide in the hole, hide and wait. Wait for nothing or wait for my death.

Edward wasn't going to come and help me this time. He was gone. He came into my life, my heart. He turned my entire existence into a paradise of wonder and excitement. Then without even an argument or a whimper he stole everything from me and left. My faith, hope, love...my happiness. without a care, he was gone, now working on his next victim probably. he did not suck the life blood from me, as vampires are supposed to do. He sucked the spirit out of me instead. he killed my fire and left me a shell, running and hiding from life.

As my thoughts continued to go wild in every direction, examining my life as it was now, I heard heavy footsteps coming. Closer and closer. I took in a deep breath and tried to quite my heart...

Leah's pov.

And once again I am being ordered around! Dammit! I just got home from a double shift, barely got out of the shower and now he is telling me to get back out there! What the hell for, because they think they found a fresh scent on a blood sucker, again. Well guess what? I don't give a crap what they think. I need rest. Not beauty rest, because frankly, I am beautiful. I just needed rest, I had been up for 24 hrs. Running circles around and around, and before then 18 hrs. Yep, no life here, and definitely, no rest. I am fucking tired...

I quickly morphed into wolf form again. I wanted all of the guys to know just how unhappy I was about being called out again. I have only been able to do the change for 10 days now. Apparently Sam thinks its better that I stay a dog for a while to get used to being a dog. whatever like any kind of normal girl wants to get used to being a dog, well wolf to be exact. I hated this shape shifter business. Only guys were supposed to change, well only guys and me. Nature had a cruel way of torturing me, first the love of my life gets ripped away from me, and now I have to turn into a dog on demand. Well guess what there are several forms of these wolf/people and I am setting out to be the major bitch of this pack. I may have no choice or control on what I have become. I may have no choice on this obedience thing or the asshole ordering me around, but I don't have to like it. Speaking of the ass, guess who he is? Oh yea, the very guy who ripped my heart out, the very guy who destroyed my future and dreams in one fell swoop. Now, not only do I have to listen and obey the piece of shit, now I have to constantly be in his head too. Seeing his dreams come true. His perfect little life, with my cousin. seeing him touch her in his head, seeing him kiss her in his head and seeing him fuck her over and over again. stupid wolf telepathy. Stupid werewolf change, Fucking mother nature and her cruel joke on my life. Well, at least I was better at hiding things than they were. If I could only get a break...one little break.

Oh look there is Jake. He is in the lead I guess we are going to catch this fang monster first...since we are the fastest, and we were really hauling ass now, dirt was flying limbs snapping, the wind was whooshing past my face and ears with a cool breeze and there wasn't a sound any were around us. The smells around us were slightly over whelming, I could smell everything the mulch under my feet that was slightly mixed with dirt and rotting, the wood on the trees and the raindrops resting on the leaves higher up. The stale water that escaped the leafy canopy and was now sitting in puddles all around us. And the very unmistakable trail that burned my nostrils like horse radish, that trail was the smell of a vampire close by. It must have passed by very recently.

Shit my nails are getting dirty again, it was unavoidable but very annoying. The dog version of my not so perfect manicure dug into the damp earth with every footfall I made, leaving my nails stained a dull brown color with dirt caked into each nail. My hair that used to be long and silky was now whacked off with a pair of kitchen sheers and was getting matted and sweaty again too. damn wolf form.

With barely a whimper I saw a meadow in Jake's head, and he stopped suddenly causing me to run right into him. "oh crap Jake, I know you wanted me to touch your ass, but you could have just asked" I thought. He huffed a little but then perked his ears up.

"Wait, Leah. Look, for a second. There she is. Open your eyes and pay the fuck attention" he growled back at me in his head.

I looked over his shoulder and there was a meadow in the middle of the forest, with dried grass and a girl. on closer inspection I recognized the girl as being Bella swan. Jake was slightly obsessed with the Swan girl. She was pretty in a pale sort of way, but seemed very quiet and maybe a little snobbish. Now though, she looked terrified.

I looked further down the field about 100 feet and I saw the reason for all of this fear. A dark, chalky vampire, with long dread locks and dirty clothes on, caked in mud and old blood. If that wasn't enough of a give-a-way his blood red eyes told us for certain he was def. Not a Cullen. he was talking to Bella in a a creepy and dominating voice.

just as I was observing the vamp, the rest of the pack caught up to us. The blood sucker was steadily creeping closer and closer to Bella as he spoke lower and lower. Bella was talking about the Cullens, they are the vamps we could not touch, the vamps who lead her on and left her high and dry in this scary world we lived in. at least she had enough since to be scared of this blood sucker. Sam took the lead as he prepared to attack. Right before he stepped out of the curtain of trees hiding us, he turned around and orders me again, in that alpha tone I can't ignore...

"Leah, I want you to take care of the girl. and don't scare the crap out of her either" so once again I had to obey the dumb mutt.

apparently I was in too bad a mood to fight a vamp. That a new wolf with a bad attitude was not something they wanted to mess with. Whatever. fuck them! The pack all started to leave me in woods, to attack. I just sat on my haunches for a second and watched them all leave. Jared left our hiding place last, and he was laughing and mocking me..so I snapped at his a tail a little, I heard him whimper a little at he tried to leap out of my way. Whatever prick, I thought I am still faster! he ran off, but he wasn't laughing anymore!

After they were out of sight I headed out to find Bella. I headed out slow to track her trail because she was gone...she was running for her life, which frankly I don't blame her she was scared before she saw us. We were pretty scary too, she must have been terrified. I knew she had to have heard the rumors about the bears attacking people. well guess what she knows now, we aren't bears. she probably did not realize we don't attack people either. We protect them from the vampires who can't seem to stay away from here. I was getting closer to her so I morphed back into my true form and threw on the tank dress I had tied around my leg.

I started walking now slower so I wouldn't scare her, I could smell her blood, she was hurt but not bad. she had stopped running now, good thing because she wasn't good at it. I think she fell more than she ran. She was hiding. Scared to death, I pitied her a little and decided to be nice, I haven't talked to any king of girl except my mom in a while and frankly I was getting lonely for a friend to chat with that could not read my mind. There she was under some tree roots. I will let her discover me first. I don't think I need to be to obvious. She will probably already put all this together quite easily. According to Jake she was very perceptive and handled the super natural well. A little to well. She must have been holding her breath, because I heard a swoosh from her lungs letting it out. Her heart was beating like crazy from the run and the adrenaline pumping through her veins. She started to slowly move, I think she was getting ready to peek out at me.

Bella's pov

The foot steps changed, they were heavy and coming faster at first when they were farther away. Now they were light barely there, and very much closer...then they just stopped. I tried to let my breath out slowly, with no luck. I needed air. my heart was still thundering in my chest. I had to get away. I couldn't just sit here and wait for death. I peeked out of my hiding place slowly, as quietly as I could. I did not see anything at first but then I noticed her. Not a monster wolf or Laurent it was a girl, and not just any girl, Leah Clearwater. I knew her threw my dad. We had dinner with them a few times growing up. she used to be pretty nice although lately she had seemed bitter and angry. She was looking right at me at first but then glanced away and around the trees all at once like she was trying to act like she didn't see me there. I crept out of my hiding place and darted my eyes around too. I was trying to see through the trees at all the hidden terrors that haunted the area, but I saw and heard nothing.

"How did you get here? What is going on?" This was like a bad dream. Girls don't just walk around the forest aimlessly running into each other.

She smiled at me a stated frankly " I walked. how else would I have gotten here?" I was relieved at first because she must have known were here is and could help me get home. Then I remembered how conveniently, coincidental this all was, and it crept me out a little. I will have to think on this later though, and tucked it away for now.

"What are you doing here, and why are you hiding under tree roots? What is wrong with you for anyway, you look like you have seen a ghost or something?" she asked me while picking at her nails.

I frantically thought of a cover story "I was out looking for a place, a meadow." I stated. "I found it, but there was someone else there, he was scary, then I saw those bears...except they weren't bears they were humongous wolves, so I ran and hid. Now I am here" it sounded lame to me so it must have sounded pathetic to her too.

"that doesn't make since, Bella." she exclaimed, she looked a little annoyed like she knew I was lying. "you came out here, all by your self to look for a meadow in the middle of the forest, and you saw a guy? and huge wolves. wait I heard about those wolves. did they see you?"

"no, I don't think they cared about me, they chased after the man though. They were terrifying. I have been to the meadow before with my boyfriend, well, ex boyfriend now." I looked down at my hands wrapped around my torso tightly. The hole was there in my chest. It did not feel like it was getting bigger though, like it was sterile and dead. Or maybe sedated. "He wasn't there of course, I just wanted to feel him with me again" I mumbled, so low I thought maybe she didn't here that part.

"your boyfriend?" she asked me. "oh yea I remember charlie, saying something about you dating Edward Cullen, and they left town right?"

"yea, they left. We broke up" she must have heard me then, I hugged my middle tighter, I thought I was going to crumble up. I did not want to think about him. Or the emptiness, much less talk about him. I wanted to see him feel him, be complete again. But like the last several months, he wasn't there. I guess in a way I did see a ghost, that is all I would ever see of him from now on. He wasn't coming back. None of them were. They left me, like a rejected piece of trash. Without a second thought. I gave them everything and they tossed it out and forgot about me. They did not care enough to stay. He did not care enough to work this out, or let me make my own mind about our relationship.

"I guess he really is gone, huh?" I asked myself out loud. I took a deep breath as this realization started to overwhelm my head for the first time. He wasn't coming back. I almost died. and for what? Nothing, he was nothing now. I had to get passed this nothing, this void...before it did consume my life.

Leah, gave me a gentle smile and pulled my hand away from my stomach "Bella, I know how you feel, I know what you are going through. It's like you can't talk about it...you can't think about him, you don't know how you can go on with out him. Like you will stop existing if you don't have him with you. I have lived with what you are feeling right now, but girl listen" then she pressed my hand to my own heart, it had slowed a bit but was still pounding in my chest. She tilted her head a bit to look in my eyes, while hold my hand to my heart "this is real Bella, you are real, and you are letting this guy, who doesn't want you, destroy your life. Do you want him to have that control on you. He doesn't care for you, Bella. Don't make him have too, he won't, he won't do it right, you will never be happy. You will never be able to live again. You have to let him go. Be your own person. Bella, look at me! You have to live for you. you have to love yourself! You are your own keeper now, you are strong enough to get past this guy."

Her words stung, it was like a knife cutting out the dead pieces of my heart. But, as I listened to her words, she was replacing the dead pieces with her strength. filling my heart with her courage...I let my arm fall to my side and took a breath. I raised my head slightly and looked in her eyes. All I could think about was, wow, she is right...I can't let him tear me up anymore...

"how?" I had to ask, she had the answer I needed. She had the strength I needed. The power to heal was there within my grasp, I just had to find it and understand it. I definitely wanted it, more than anything.

"One day at a time, Bella. Lets go, we need to get back before it gets dark." She smiled a vibrant smile, it reached her eyes and I knew she was trying to be sincere and helpful. We started tramping through the damp foliage. "you know, Bella?" She asked, "if you took some classes and learned to defend your self it would help... you need an outlet, and frankly, girl you could use some muscles and a little grace to."

I laughed a little. I did need to learn balance. I tripped over air on good days. "sure Leah!" He probably did not realize it now, but her being here gave me hope. Like someone was looking out for me.

"You know Bella, I was thinking about a trip to Port Angeles soon, you should go with me. we could get are hair done and go shopping." She was pushing it now, I did want to change, but I really did hate shopping. Was every girl in the world addicted to shopping except me.

"I'll think about it Leah." I stated, I did like being around her. Just like Jacob radiated sun and warmth, she radiated, strength and hope for me. I wanted more of this, even if it meant a trip to go shopping. I could handle it. I liked this new Leah, and I need to find the source of her strength. Learn how she got by with half of herself gone.

We had finally made it back to my truck, so I offered her a ride home. She declined, but told me she would call me about our trip and she wasn't taking no for an answer. Oh well, it would make Charlie happy if I hung out with more friends, anyway. Leah was way more tolerable than Jessica any day!

I smiled again and told her I would see her later. she was going to be an awesome friend! I needed her.

Leah's pov

I watched the truck turn the corner out of sight, with Bella tucked away safe inside it. She really was fragile, like porcelain, but somewhere inside her was a strong girl screaming to get out. she would be all right. We would make good friends, I think. I got undressed and tied my dress to my leg again so I could morph into a wolf once more. As soon as I changed I could here the guys whooping and yelping there victory cry. I was in a better mood now so I let what occurred on my end pass through my head, mostly for Jake's sake, but also to update them.

"Leah?" Sam thought to me. "if you really need a day off, go ahead and take the rest of tonight and tomorrow off." I whooped then, too! This was huge! I started sprinting to the house, while watching visions of the vampire being torn to pieces and visions from Jake, of Bella, after a make over by me! It was really funny if you saw it from a happier point of view. The guys were all celebrating while the embers were fading out from the vampire bonfire they created and they did not need my help anymore so I started heading home for a little, well earned break.