Disclaimer: Don't own anything but my warped lil mind. =)

A/N: soooooooooooooo I happened to be watching Pulp Fiction the other day and this scene came on where Vincent shoots Marvin in the face. I've seen it dozens of times before but then it hit me. Dude! That's so Reno and Rude. So ladies and gents... I give you the following warped parody:


Reno and Rude had just picked up the sensitive package that Tseng insisted on being brought back immediately. Vincent Valentine. The man was an enigma. Dark and foreboding but at the same time painfully withdrawn. He used to be one of them. A Turk. Well, really once a Turk always a Turk.

The two men upfront had been discussing something trivial. Vincent paid it no mind as he looked around the area he was seated in. This was a quick transport helicopter. Not the normal one Reno flew. Vincent noticed that Reno was injured, one of his arms in a sling. Must be why the bald one was at the controls.

"Ever see that show MPs?" Reno didn't wait for an answer. "I was watchin' it this one time and dis cop was on and and he was talkin' bout dis gunfight he had in the hallway wit this guy, right? And he just unloaded on this guy and nuttin' happen. He didn't hit nuttin'. Okay it was just him and this guy."

Rude continued to ignore his partner.

"Yanno it's freaky but it happens."

The bald man suddenly turned to look at his partner.

"Look you want to play blind man go walk with the Goddess, but me… my eyes are wide fuckin' open," Rude said.

"Tha fuck that supposed to mean, yo?"

"It means that's it for me. From here on in you can consider my ass retired," Rude claimed.

"Gahdamnit!"

"Don't blaspheme," Rude scolded Reno.

"For Gaia's sake Rude!"

"I SAID DON'T DO THAT!"

"Ayo why you fuckin' freakin' out on me?" Reno demanded an immediate answer of his long time partner.

"Look, I'm telling Tseng and Rufus today. I'm through," the dark man responded.

"Well why don't you tell them at the same time the reason why?"

"Don't worry I will."

"Man and I betcha 10,000 gil they laugh they asses off," Reno smirked when he noticed his jibe hit the mark.

"I don't give a damn if they do…"

Reno starts fiddling with his EMR when he remembers that Vincent is sitting behind them. The former Turk is slouching in his seat. His ethereal face concealed by the high cowl neck of his crimson colored cloak.

"Aye, Vinny, whatta you make of all this?"

Vincent pauses, looks up from his cowl and states, "I am of no opinion on the subject and my name is Vincent."

Turning around, Reno leans over the seats in the cockpit, he rests his EMR against the headrest.

"Well you gotta have an opinion. I mean do you think this Goddess/Loveless shit is right..."

Suddenly, Reno's EMR goes off, casting a Bolt3 spell hitting Vincent Valentine in the face.

"OH!"

"THE FUCK JUST HAPPEN?" Rude's bellow shakes the metal walls of the helicopter.

"Oh fuck! I just blasted Vinny in the face," Reno exclaims.

"Why the fuck did you do that," Rude demands.

"I-I didn't mean to do that! It was an accident!"

"Man, I've seen you fuck up many times but this…"

"Chill out, man. I told you it was an accident. You prolly ran into some turbulence," Reno said, looking for any plausible excuse for his fuck up.

"I did not fly into any motherfucking turbulence," Rude said in a deadly calm tone.

"Look," Reno said, he was pleading with his partner. "I-I didn't mean to blast the wannabe vampire. The EMR just.. casted Bolt3, I-I don't know why."

Rude turned to look at his partner, slowly pushing down his sunglasses to gaze at him directly. Reno took an audible gulp.

"You do realize, you just hit Vincent Valentine with Bolt3. A man with not one, not two, not three but four demons in him. FOUR MUTHAHFUCKIN' DEMONS," Rude roared.

Reno paled. Bad enough he felt bad that his EMR went off and injured an innocent man, but now that Rude ever so gently reminded him of Vincent's special quirks, Reno nearly pissed his pants. Taking a big risk, Reno turned around to take a look at Vincent. Reno started panicking again. Vincent looked like he was dead. "Wait, he always looks like he's dead," the redhead muttered to himself.

Suddenly feeling a blast of air hit him, Reno turned towards his partner. Rude had opened the door on his side and was finishing buckling a parachute bag around him.

"R-rude. Yer, yer not gonna leave me are ya?" Reno was shocked how small his voice sounded.

"Damn straight I am."

With that, Rude jumped out of the helicopter. Reno sat there for a moment looking dumbfounded until his felt the chopper pitch. He quickly acted and jumped in the pilot's seat and took over the controls. Reno did his best to find the closest place he could land safely. He did not want to be in the helicopter a minute longer than he had too.

Suddenly he heard movement from behind him.

"Vi-vi-Vinny?" He whispered.

The sound of really sharp teeth chattering answered him. Reno hung his head in defeat.

"H-hello Ch-Chaos."


A/N: this was fun.. slow day at work so I threw this together.