Language of a forensic scientist describing a blood spatter scene:

"The trajectory angle starts low and goes high establishing that a very short person slashed with an upward motion causing linear spatters overlaying the original blunt force frontal attack with the baseball bat. Very nice indeed."

Language of a Detective's first impression describing the blood spatter after hearing the forensic scientists' explanation:

"Only my brother could describe a fucking sawed off pervert's slam and slash and make it sound like a fucking ketchup commercial! Fries anyone? Did you want those supersized? Did you happen to notice the fucking body asshole?"